Am 29, she is 20, We are into [i]dis [/i]long distance relationship stuff.

She has been out of secondary school since 2 yrs but considering her IQ, the love we share and our compatibility to some reasonable degree, I was working on possibly proposing and getting married to her, while she continue with her education after marriage on part-time basis (it worked for me for same reason of lack of financial support from my parents)

But She just told me that by next year that she will be starting preparations for her admission.

PLEASE MY SINCERE BROTHERS AND SISTERS HERE (trying to be sensible here)

Proposing to her now is out of place (IE. for a girl that is preparing to pursue her academic career)

Then considering time factor, writing Jamb/exams, waiting and sorts, I may not be dt patience since marriage opportunity will not be anywhere in view.

WHAT DO I DO PLS? (I don't want her to think that i just want to discontinue the relationship with some funny reasons)

Hmm brb

Poster am not really sure i understand what you are tryna say, is it dat you want to quit your relationship cos your girl is going to school,and you don't know how to make her see reasons,if yes,then my advice is,you can wait a lil longer if you really love this girl and if she loves you too,just pray and ask God for directions,am sure he'll help you on what to do.

koolchicco:

Hmm brb

Am waiting for your come back.

k-money £:

[size=20pt]Old man be focused you hear whatever will be will be[/size]***

Even if what must be must be, what do i do @ d moment?

freecocoa:

Poster am not really sure i understand what you are tryna say, is it dat you want to quit your relationship cos your girl is going to school,and you don't know how to make her see reasons,if yes,then my advice is,you can wait a lil longer if you really love this girl and if she loves you too,just pray and ask God for directions,am sure he'll help you on what to do.

Right on spot, I guess she is always wondering whats will be going on my mind concerning the relationship, but because i don't want to make a statement that will not come to be(proposing to her)

But I have to any other option than to wait.

GOD CAN AS WELL ESTABLISH HIS WORD THROUGH CIRCUMSTANCE, AM PRAYING ABOUT IT.

She's only 20 and you want to propose marriage to her already?  She maybe intelligent, but that doesn't necessarily mean that she will be ready to settle down and take on a life changing experience such as this.  She is more likely still "immature" and have alot to learn about life.  That's very helpful that she is book smart, but she also has to be mature in other ways to.  Seems like she has her head on straight by continuing her education on in life.  This is a sticky situation.  

How long have you two been dating??  Because marriage is serious business and requires alot of responsibilties keeping a home and being a wife and maybe down the line having children.  Some women are able to toggle the married life as well as attend school at the same time.  But you sound like a guy that requires alot of attention from his mate and that may become a huge problem down the line.  School is very time consuming which means it will definitely take away alot of alone time with her.  But if you feel if it's worth it and you two can make out a schedule for alone time but it's going to have to take alot of patience and understanding on your part.  Are you able to cope with that without resenting or regretting her?  You two definitely need to sit down and discuss what your short term goals are in your lives. Ask her where she see herself in the next year or so.  This should've been asked on the first date.  Anyway, don't rush things thinking she will find someone else.  You never know what can happen. But whatever you choose to do, just let her know your goals in life right now (include marriage, family, work etc.) and then you two going have to decide if you two are going to be compatible in the very near future.  If you decide to let her go and attend school and all that good stuff, make sure you let her know kindly why it's not going to work out.  That way she not left wondering what the heck is going on or think bad about you.

I hope any of this helps. Good luck.

190:

[size=18pt]K money abeg take that Irritating DOG OFF MY SCREEN!! [/size]

Please 190, spear that battle, i need results, my post shouldn't form a basis for battle, am not a battle ground.

For now post your comment(s)

livedit:

She's only 20 and you want to propose marriage to her already?  She maybe intelligent, but that doesn't necessarily mean that she will be ready to settle down and take on a life changing experience such as this.  She is more likely still "immature" and have alot to learn about life.  That's very helpful that she is book smart, but she also has to be mature in other ways to.  Seems like she has her head on straight by continuing her education on in life.  This is a sticky situation.  

How long have you two been dating??  Because marriage is serious business and requires alot of responsibilties keeping a home and being a wife and maybe down the line having children.  Some women are able to toggle the married life as well as attend school at the same time.  But you sound like a guy that requires alot of attention from his mate and that may become a huge problem down the line.  School is very time consuming which means it will definitely take away alot of alone time with her.  But if you feel if it's worth it and you two can make out a schedule for alone time but it's going to have to take alot of patience and understanding on your part.  Are you able to cope with that without resenting or regretting her?  You two definitely need to sit down and discuss what your short term goals are in your lives. Ask her where she see herself in the next year or so.  This should've been asked on the first date.  Anyway, don't rush things thinking she will find someone else.  You never know what can happen. But whatever you choose to do, just let her know your goals in life right now (include marriage, family, work etc.) and then you two going have to decide if you two are going to be compatible in the very near future.  If you decide to let her go and attend school and all that good stuff, make sure you let her know kindly why it's not going to work out.  That way she not left wondering what the heck is going on or think bad about you.

I hope any of this helps. Good luck.

We've been together for like 20 months, I will wait a while then discuss it with her.
For now i still doubt the financial capability of her people.
Am not seeing anything here as a do or die affair, If i get a go ahead from my heartthen i shall proceed but if otherwise, then nothing happens.
Financially, morally am equal to the task for marriage!
Am actually against late marriage especally when there is no any special reason that will necessitate it.

To some reasonable degree, i took care of my only younger one n my mom(dad late)
Gainfully/self employed, have a car of my own and have almost completed my building,

I DON'T THINK THAT AM RUSHING INTO MARRIAGE,  FOR A GUY THAT DON'T FOOL AROUND WITH GIRLS (WHICH AM TRYING TO PREVENT)

k-money £:

[size=20pt]Old man be focused you hear whatever will be will be[/size]***

I BEG OF YOU, FOR GOODNESS SAKE AND FOR THE SAKE OF MY CHALLENGES, QUICKLY KINDLY TRASH DISUPLOAD (if there is any English like that) THAT SHIT DOG


Thank you

That's a long time so you two should pretty much should know each other. I think that is awesome that you have a lot to offer her but my worries is if SHE would be ready for all this. You mentioned you are 29 right? So you are pretty much establishing yourself. She is just starting. SHE is still very young. That's what I meant by her being inexperienced with life. I still think you ought to talk to her about your feelings if you are truly feeling that she is the one. But if you are fine either way it goes as you just stated. Then I say go for it and ask her. Never hurt to take a chance. You just gotta be prepared for whatever the outcome is.

In short, she's too young for you.  You're ready to settle down and she's five years away. 
Just tell her the truth, and break up amicably; she'll find someone else at school for sure.

^^^Agree!!! Straight to the point, Brilliant!!!!

OP.
jUST LET HER GO . . . , She ll definitely find the right person for her!

@Poster. . .take this as painful advice: Cut her a big slack! The marriage idea will not fly with her now 'cos she's too immature to handle it, regardless of her so-called IQ. Experience is the best teacher and many people on this thread are talking from experience. Put her in back-up mode and go with the flow, make other girl friends and never set your heart on this girl for a long term relationship now. Even for "very normal" girls at that age, it is very difficult to pull through but if she's anything less than "normal" ("normal" means reasonable, rational, patient, can truly love and understand what it means, etc), the mountain you wish to surmount approaches the size of Everest in a geometric progression!

All points noted.

Thank you.