Should I Marry My Widow Friend? - Dating And Meet-up Zone - Nairaland
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Which Do I Marry: The One Who Loves Me Or The One I Love? / My Friend Is Looking For A Relationship, She Is 55 Years Old Shy Arab, A Widow / My Desire A Sugar Mama....single...divorcee...widow Am Here. Baby (2) (3) (4)
| Should I Marry My Widow Friend? by 8oracle(m): 3:03pm On May 29, 2007 |
Am very close to a beautiful widow of three sons, one is in the university, Though we have discussed the possibility of marriage. She said she will accept if i ask her. She had made her intent known to her sons, who kicked against her getting remarried. But when they found out am the one involved, they kind of mellowed down. Should i go ahead and ask her to marry me? Have anyone been involved in this kind of relationship and marriage? What re your experience? She is 39yrs while am 36. But her age doesn't bother me an iota inch |
| Re: Should I Marry My Widow Friend? by IBDat(m): 3:43pm On May 29, 2007 |
Well some people will say as long as u're both in love that is all that matters. I say that is a good basis to start from: - Her children, have they now accepted and cool with this or are they just moaning under their breaths? - Her ex, his is still alive? - What of his family? As they would like to see their Nephews/Nieces/Grand children/Cousins etc As long as you understand that this women already has a family be it in a relationship or not and you feel you cool with that and can handle it, then YES go ahead if that is where your heart lies  |
| Re: Should I Marry My Widow Friend? by ikamefa(f): 5:14pm On May 29, 2007 |
if there is acceptance from all concerned and this marriage is not based on pity!  but true love! , then carry go!  |
| Re: Should I Marry My Widow Friend? by lauryn(f): 5:16pm On May 29, 2007 |
ikamefa: whatchu kno bout true love?  |
| Re: Should I Marry My Widow Friend? by ikamefa(f): 5:18pm On May 29, 2007 |
lauryn:  lauriniiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii!  how'dy?wetin i sabi? nattin jare! " " |
| Re: Should I Marry My Widow Friend? by lauryn(f): 5:25pm On May 29, 2007 |
bodi dey clot! how've u been?. I bin hear sey na U dey hammer for Nl o, biko troway gist jor |
| Re: Should I Marry My Widow Friend? by ikamefa(f): 5:37pm On May 29, 2007 |
gist kor ! story ni i look like tatafo to you? |
| Re: Should I Marry My Widow Friend? by lauryn(f): 5:40pm On May 29, 2007 |
aren't U?. Biko, no dey disappoint me like dat jor, do tell pls. I hia sey na u dey run things for hia! |
| Re: Should I Marry My Widow Friend? by cuteass1(f): 9:32pm On May 29, 2007 |
@ IBDat I kind of want to second you but . . IBDat: I totally hands down, lying on the floor agree with you on this one. Love isn't all that matters, you got to make the ingredients on the "recipe list" complete  IBDat: Well if they say they've accepted with a smiling face, then he just has to believe them. If they're moaning under their breaths, thats their own plate of rice, he ain't a mind reader IBDat: The topic did say "widow" which makes me guess strongly that the ex-hubby is dead. IBDat: Well that shouldn't be a problem if all other things are in their right places, the kids from her earlier husband are adults and should know that they have a "father's family", their mum's new husband notwithstanding. IBDat: Yea, i love the sound of that. Both of you should know what surrounds your new relationship, I know many have done it in the past so it wouldn't be out of the blue or unheard of. Even the bible announces death as one of the causes that could lead to re-marrying. But let her not in the cause of things forget her other family, she has kids with them, so to an extent, she belongs there, and she should also "give honor to whom honor is due" by telling them about your intentions when the proposal is done. If they accept, well and good. If they don't, thats their bone to chew but she owes them the knowledge If you guys have your hearts in the right place, why the hell not?? |
| Re: Should I Marry My Widow Friend? by 8oracle(m): 1:40pm On Jun 04, 2007 |
My Fellow Nairalanders, My Pop and Mom having told them about my intent to marry yhis widow had objected on technical grounds. 1 No matter what may,that in future the children may take away thier mother way from me, it like a fresh spinster getting married to a widower with three grown up sons, thinking that she will be an inheritor to the man's asset, they even gave me examples around. 2 In view of my revealing the widow might seems to have have not much of an assets from the former late hubby, and having not inform them about her intent to get remarried, that immediately she did, she will be called to give account of what and what that belonged to the late hubby, no matter how little it might be, not to allow any inheritance of thier late son to come to me, or us. they gave me a local example of my neice who is living pretty until she vocalised her intent to remarry, her late husband's bros turn to some other things else. 3 Or i may be gullible, t he widow trying to use me to accellerate her remaining sons education or other training, and restrict herself from having any baby though she said he will, and latter blame our if to be childlesness marriage as an avenue to leave me . All the same i do inform them of bringing the lady home, to forstall on giving a dog a bad name and hang it. |
| Re: Should I Marry My Widow Friend? by sikis(f): 2:41pm On Jun 04, 2007 |
Your posts just confirmed my fears that i will have a hard time finding a man who will marry me against all odds in this country, i was widowed a while ago , i am now 35 and people keep asking why i havent remarried. First of all it is not in my hands, i havent met the " right" man yet. But apart from this i have been a bit weary of dating again, you meet a man and the minute he finds out that you are a widow with 2 kids he takes to his heels, even when they do hang on, i discover that thay just want to take advantage of your vulnerability. Now i know that the ones who truly love you wll not take the plunge becuase of societal values, like someone said love is not enough, Does that mean i should accept the fact that i ll never remarry a man from this country? So whats a lonely widow to do, |
| Re: Should I Marry My Widow Friend? by coolsimon(m): 4:45pm On Jun 04, 2007 |
| yes if she possesess the qualities I am looking for. I thiing there is no problem for that. |
| Re: Should I Marry My Widow Friend? by Nobody: 6:28pm On Jun 05, 2007 |
if you feel like she's got what you desire in a woman, go for her. safe |
| Re: Should I Marry My Widow Friend? by 8oracle(m): 10:10am On Jun 08, 2007 |
@sikis, Your contribution makes sense, but it seems you may not have understood my feeling for this widow friend of mine. I do not bother an aorta of her having three grown up sons. The bare facts which was laid down by my parents was that at present the marriage would mostly favor this widow, but in due course lets say 20yrs from now when the sons will retaliate against me for having taken away their mom, and will do everything within there power to retake thier mom. For a fact they gave me examples of men within our village village, and environ whom these aftermath had became their lot. Presently am considering all options and have to laid these bare fact on the table before her. The most understanding issue is my paents are liberal thinkers, they even suggested that, had it been females re the kids of this widow, they would not hesistiate informing her to come over and see them. |
| Re: Should I Marry My Widow Friend? by ozoneflake(m): 7:32pm On Jun 11, 2007 |
My brother pls thats another mans wife living with his children. The way you sound am begining to think that you may have killed the poor man to take his wife. For Gods sake cant you find your thru love and stop living in cold romantic dreams, or you want to wait till the day his children will beat you up. Stop this bull shit and find a lovely young gal to love, i beg you. |
| Re: Should I Marry My Widow Friend? by 8oracle(m): 1:00pm On Jun 12, 2007 |
ozoneflake: Far be it from what you assume, she had been widowed for 9yrs before when we became aquainted just three months ago, my hands re free and clean. The fact i found out showed it seems an abhorence a never married man, like myself saying i want to marry this widow friend of mine, even friends i thought enlighthened deeply frowned against it, why so in Nigeria? this kind of marriage stuff goes okay in most part of the world, Europe, Continental US, even Arab countries, this is the most preffered marriage of choice. What's gwam with us? |
| Re: Should I Marry My Widow Friend? by ozoneflake(m): 2:07pm On Jun 13, 2007 |
Marriage is not an old scrap that could be abandoned when it gets too rusty. It is a life time involvement therefore you need some body who will ever remain young in your heart. |
| Re: Should I Marry My Widow Friend? by 8oracle(m): 12:57pm On Jun 14, 2007 |
I am happy to found myself among the leaque of gentlemen. |
| Re: Should I Marry My Widow Friend? by publicview: 1:27pm On Dec 13, 2007 |
Any new development? straight to the point have you lay her hard? |
| Re: Should I Marry My Widow Friend? by Nautillus(m): 1:41pm On Dec 13, 2007 |
I think you should ride out your parents view of the situation 4 they know more that we do MOST TIMES. I hope you come out ok eventually. Take heart bro |
| Re: Should I Marry My Widow Friend? by 8oracle(m): 2:44pm On Dec 13, 2007 |
publicview: I am a gentleman several times with her, i will never resist her chocolate thighs, if that is what you mean.The going is good in that respect |
| Re: Should I Marry My Widow Friend? by zignor(m): 3:13pm On Dec 13, 2007 |
8oracle: I knew it . . .her chocolate thigh  dude, are you jazzed? |
| Re: Should I Marry My Widow Friend? by 8oracle(m): 3:38pm On Dec 13, 2007 |
@zignor, we re two responsible adults, we re not allergic to such pleasures, we want our relationship to remain at that level. Our lovemaking is as if we re in Eden, With Yanni (Devotion album) playing at the background .What a oooooooooooophs. Good that publicview asked. |
| Re: Should I Marry My Widow Friend? by zignor(m): 4:09pm On Dec 13, 2007 |
If you say so, then go ahead and marry her I wish you |
| Re: Should I Marry My Widow Friend? by ariblaze(m): 7:58pm On Dec 14, 2007 |
@poster you seem to have a good head on you and your post suggests this lady does too i thus see no reason why you would want our take on this, if i were you i would go ahead,put a degree of permanency into what you already have |
| Re: Should I Marry My Widow Friend? by amievivian(f): 12:06am On Dec 15, 2007 |
ariblaze: arisweet!!! nice words |
| Re: Should I Marry My Widow Friend? by saucekid(m): 12:40pm On Dec 15, 2007 |
zignor: definitely he is jazzed  |
| Re: Should I Marry My Widow Friend? by rosecare(f): 1:09pm On Dec 15, 2007 |
hmmmmmmm what ever such is life!!!!!!! |
| Re: Should I Marry My Widow Friend? by Nobody: 1:58pm On Dec 15, 2007 |
@ 8oracle: You were doing great, untill you decided to state what you get up to with your lady, that was a bit unlike you! Still, you 2 seem pretty well matched, I would certainly considering her. As for her children, they're pretty much grown up, I'm sure they wouldn't want their mom to remain alone for the rest of her natural. Besides, you seem to get on with them too. All the best of luck, but you probably don't need it, tie the knot - life is all about taking risks, if you don't, you'd always ask yourself what could have been. If you do marry her, and it doesn't work out, (I think it will though) at least, you'd know you did try. |
| Re: Should I Marry My Widow Friend? by AOYEGBESANYAHOOCOM(m): 3:15pm On Dec 15, 2007 |
Siena from mechanics to match making? Poster do wotever u fancy, who cares. |
| Re: Should I Marry My Widow Friend? by saucekid(m): 3:47pm On Dec 15, 2007 |
@ rosecare, which kain such is life preaching be this?? |
| Re: Should I Marry My Widow Friend? by kunle75(m): 5:31pm On Dec 15, 2007 |
LANDERS, cant u pple for once give this guy a good advice, av known this honorable house to be very tact in terms of decisions and advice of wch av found useful often times but as for this discussion on ground me i opt out patapata my hand no dey at all,cant he for once look else where for his wife must he go looking after his widow friend?for God sake there are young and energetic ladies out there who are single,seriously searching and besides he said they both became acquinted bearly 3 months ago HABA!!!!!!!!!!!,my bros thread the terrain with caution ok and be sure ur heart is genuine towards that woman,shld anything happen u will definitely be held responsible.HAVE FUN WHILE IT LAST |
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