The elegant Helen Prest-Ajayi is a mother of three beautiful daughters. At 60, her youthful appearance belies her age and that was the first thing that struck me when I walked into her beautiful residence for the interview. An ex-beauty queen, author and literacy advocate, Mrs. Prest-Ajayi, still retains the poise and charm that earned her the coveted Miss Nigeria title 41 years ago. Here, she speaks about motherhood, healthy living and support system.


PT: You are a mum of three beautiful girls; do you sometimes wish you had a son? Do you miss not having a son?
Helen Prest-Ajayi: No, not at all. My daughters’ husband will be my sons. Motherhood is not about you and your desires, it’s about the children that God has gifted to you. Children are not jewelry around your neck, neither are they meant for you to fulfill all your unfulfilled ambitions in your children.

No, your children are separate, God has given them to you to raise and to become useful to fellow human beings and society. It’s not about raising them to be a carbon copy of you and your unfulfilled ambitions, they are individuals that have their destiny. They have their own lives; you are a shepherd to guide them to fulfill their destiny.

You didn’t bring them here to fulfill your destiny, you are not having children because of what you want, you are having them as a gift from God to come into the society and world and grow into whatever the world requires of them.

My prayer is that my children would be useful to the family and to society at large. My vision for every child is to become a useful human being, nurturing, caring, kind, useful, hardworking, intelligent. I raise human beings that will make a difference, that will contribute to making the world a better place. They should come to do good and depart. My children are an extension of me, quite alright, but I hope they are a good extension and they should also be an extension of themselves as well.

FABMUMNG: Thoughts on Mother’s Day?

Helen Prest-Ajayi: Mothers’ Day is a great day to say thank you to mothers everywhere. We need to say thank you. Without mothers, there will be no children. Mothers are really the seed starting points in a home, in a community, in a society, in a country. The quality of a mother determines the quality of society. We need to take motherhood and mothers really more seriously. It is not something that should just be left to chance.

Because when the wife, the woman, the mother is educated, it is likely that the children will be educated; mothers are the first teachers, you can only give what you know. And education is everything. That early education is everything, that’s where you learn about a balanced diet, hygiene, etc.

We currently have Coronavirus and yet some people are behaving as if they’ve never been told to wash their hands before. If you went to school and come from an educated home, you will know that it starts with washing hands.
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