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Nairaland Forum / Entertainment / Jokes Etc / What Is The Funniest Thing U Ever Heard In Your Life (2825 Views)
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What Is The Funniest Thing U Ever Heard In Your Life by rahjan: 3:55pm On Jan 03, 2011 |
Guys lets just have fun;i dont care if its an original joke or real life event as long as somebody has not heard it before, then make that person laff. ps: i will not be responsible for soiled laundry due to too much laffing. oya lets start.who wants to go first? |
Re: What Is The Funniest Thing U Ever Heard In Your Life by rahjan: 4:05pm On Jan 03, 2011 |
This is something i found on the net, little childrens' defination of what love is If falling in love is anything like learning how to spell, I don't want to do it. It takes too long." -- Glenn, age 7 "Love is like an avalanche where you have to run for your life." -- John, age 9 "I think you're supposed to get shot with an arrow or something, but the rest of it isn't supposed to be so painful." -- Manuel, age 8 "No one is sure why it happens, but I heard it has something to do with how you smell. That's why perfume and deodorant are so popular." -- Mae, age 9 "Love is the most important thing in the world, but baseball is pretty good too." -- Greg, age 8 "Once I'm done with kindergarten, I'm going to find me a wife." -- Tom, age 5 "On the first date, they just tell each other lies, and that usually gets them interested enough to go for a second date." -- Mike, 10 "I'm in favor of love as long as it doesn't happen when Dinosaurs is on television." -- Jill, age 6 "One of the people has freckles, and so he finds somebody else who has freckles too." -- Andrew, age 6 "My mother says to look for a man who is kind. That's what I'll do. I'll find somebody who's kinda tall and handsome." -- Carolyn, age 8 "It gives me a headache to think about that stuff. I'm just a kid. I don't need that kind of trouble." -- Kenny, age 7 "One of you should know how to write a check. Because, even if you have tons of love, there is still going to be a lot of bills." -- Ava, age 8 "When somebody's been dating for a while, the boy might propose to the girl. He says to her, 'I'll take you for a whole life, or at least until we have kids and get divorced.'" -- Anita, 9 "I'm not rushing into being in love. I'm finding fourth grade hard enough." -- Regina, age 10 "Most men are brainless, so you might have to try more than once to find a live one." -- Angie, age 10 "A man and a woman promise to go through sickness and illness and diseases together." -- Marlon, age 10 "[Being] single is better . . . for the simple reason that I wouldn't want to change no diapers. Of course, if I did get married, I'd figure something out. I'd just phone my mother and have her come over for some coffee and diaper-changing." -- Kirsten, age 10 "Love is foolish, but I still might try it sometime." -- Floyd, age 9 "Love will find you, even if you are trying to hide from it. I been trying to hide from it since I was five, but the girls keep finding me." -- Dave, age 8 |
Re: What Is The Funniest Thing U Ever Heard In Your Life by jokingmary(m): 4:12pm On Jan 03, 2011 |
Nice try |
Re: What Is The Funniest Thing U Ever Heard In Your Life by eldav(m): 4:15pm On Jan 03, 2011 |
wetin u sabi be nice? |
Re: What Is The Funniest Thing U Ever Heard In Your Life by rahjan: 4:21pm On Jan 03, 2011 |
Check out this job application of the decade: Application Letter for Replacement of the Dead Manager RE: APPLICATION FOR REPLACEMENT OF THE DEAD MANAGER Reference is made to the recent death of the Manager at your Company and wish to apply for the replacement of the dead Manager. Each time I apply for employment I am told there is no vacancy but on this one, i have caught you red handed. I even attended the funeral and all burial process and made sure that I hear from you who will take up the position. All I can remember was you saying that it will be difficult to replace him meaning there is no one at the moment. Its sad that he has left us but at least I benefit as he has left a vacancy for me. I only hope there will be no corruption as we are all still mourning. He was my neighbor and it will be easy for me to continue with his legacy because I was seeing the time he was coming for work and knocking off. I will be sending my pictures whilst attending the funeral and burial so that you can see how tough I was and can be when employed. Thanks for advertising the funeral because I could not have known. Yours smiling, Exaud Minja |
Re: What Is The Funniest Thing U Ever Heard In Your Life by jokingmary(m): 4:24pm On Jan 03, 2011 |
eldav:No let me face you |
Re: What Is The Funniest Thing U Ever Heard In Your Life by eldav(m): 4:29pm On Jan 03, 2011 |
which face? abi d one with slashes abi awala mark? ugly yoruba brat. |
Re: What Is The Funniest Thing U Ever Heard In Your Life by jokingmary(m): 4:32pm On Jan 03, 2011 |
Now I'm sure u need to see the doctor cause ( 1) I'm not Yoruba (2) I don't have any awala mark like u do ( u know that people hardly recognize u because of it ) |
Re: What Is The Funniest Thing U Ever Heard In Your Life by eldav(m): 4:46pm On Jan 03, 2011 |
joker shift one side,ur guts dey annoying. |
Re: What Is The Funniest Thing U Ever Heard In Your Life by jokingmary(m): 4:48pm On Jan 03, 2011 |
eldav:Yep but urs is U should understand |
Re: What Is The Funniest Thing U Ever Heard In Your Life by denzel2009: 4:55pm On Jan 03, 2011 |
Here is one
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Re: What Is The Funniest Thing U Ever Heard In Your Life by EfemenaXY: 5:00pm On Jan 03, 2011 |
hehehehe!!! @Denzel - your rejection letter na die!! you've got me laughing real hard year best joke of the year so far - Nice!! Keep 'em coming pls |
Re: What Is The Funniest Thing U Ever Heard In Your Life by denzel2009: 5:10pm On Jan 03, 2011 |
Efemena_xy: I don't call people Skank ho, I'm respectful. |
Re: What Is The Funniest Thing U Ever Heard In Your Life by StudioCFR(m): 6:38pm On Jan 03, 2011 |
lol @Skank! |
Re: What Is The Funniest Thing U Ever Heard In Your Life by Nobody: 11:29pm On Nov 05, 2012 |
OH MAN!! I found a new thread to hijack. I have several but here are a few. - A few years ago friend of mine asks me and another: "What time does 'MIDNIGHT LOVE' come on?" - This guy I grew up with took me and some others to a brand new ice cream shop some years back. They were giving out samples to people as a celebration for their new location's opening. So this mugu lol walks up to the counter, pulls out his wallet and asks: "How much is a FREE sample"? - This beautiful but airhead chick I used to hang out with saw my binder with the Jamaican flag on it. She asked me if I was American. I said, "yeah. my mom is Jamaican". She replies "where in Africa is Jamaica"? with this dumb ass smile on her face >> LOL! - We were talking about gate way drugs in my highschool health class. Somehow weed became the topic...and then of course Jamaica (smh). Next thing I know while I was discussing Rastafarianism with my class this DOMINICAN...I REPEAT DOMINICAN!!! Asked me "wait! slavery was in Jamaica too?!" -_- - This dude walked up on me @ an open house and asked me "what is your name?" mind you I had on a blasted name tag. smh. I have more!! Will post them later. |
Re: What Is The Funniest Thing U Ever Heard In Your Life by Nobody: 11:31pm On Nov 05, 2012 |
denzel2009: Studio CFR: lol lol wtf? |
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