Parents are mostly blamed for the moral decadence in our society. Especially when it turns to be the girl child.


Is it really the child or the parents?

I grew up with an old woman that when she gives you food to eat and you complain that you want to eat something else. You MUST tell her how to get money to get you what you want to eat. At last you will eat the food with tears dropping inside the bowl, after collecting a brutal beating.

When she notices a kind of bad trait in you, she'll do anything to correct it.


In my thirties but still when I dish food to eat, I don't touch the meat till I finish my food. Meat that I bought with my own money. I remember the last time I stopped crying over meat was when I was around 7, it was a knife that was thrown at me and the knife injured me, it made me realize life is more precious than meat. Till today, meat and fish is like bonus to my food.


Growing up was very hostile but I look back and thank her because her corrections can not be forgotten. Some people as well grew up in this manner but turned out to be worse. Then we blame the upbringing.


Everyone grew up with or without proper guidance. But what you chose to do with your life is what matters. Is it for good or for worse?.

If it's for good, we applaud the parents for good up bringing, if it's for bad, we shame the parents for bad upbringing. Though this doesn't stop the fact that some parents are bad, but do you know some notable people grew up in a dysfunctional home? They witnessed all the bad parenting and endured till they could make a better decision for themselves.

If you know your right to your left, believe me your upbringing won't matter, what will matter is your morals.

Over to you readers. Who should take the blame when a child turns bad?

Pardon my write up. I'm not writer. Just expressing my thought.

EDITED: someone raised a motion. He said village people(devil) has their own role in the matter. This is true though. When I say true. It is TRUE.

The devil.

Must we blame someone when things don't go well?

That aside, parents can only do their best. It's up to each child to decide what they'll do with their lives.
Parents can only influence your choice to a certain degree...

PS: I'm not downplaying the importance of good parentage

Father.

Fortissimo502:
The devil.

funny as it sounds but it's true. I know of very bright boy that all of a sudden changed course. He got worse to the extent of stealing from her guardian in broad day light. He goes to his guardian and demand money, when they object, he'll forcefully take the money from them and push them to the ground. (Like you are tussling with someone to collect money from the person).

How he turned bad still remains a mystery to everyone. Many years has passed but he's gotten worse. Moving around with gun.

When I say bright, he was admired. I admired him as a kid too.

Staphylococcus:
Father.

explain. Be detail.

Liutay:
Must we blame someone when things don't go well?

That aside, parents can only do their best. It's up to each child to decide what they'll do with their lives.
Parents can only influence your choice to a certain degree...

PS: I'm not downplaying the importance of good parentage

You be better person. Sound judgement.

Classic nature vs nurture. They are intertwined and complementary, nurture shapes what nature has given.

it all depends on:
A) the AGE of the child....
a child going bad at a very young age would be down to DNA, while a child going bad in his teen years could simply be down to puberty, friends they associate with and/or failed upbringing.

B) the FAMILY of the child...
a child raised in a violent negative environment will be different than a child raised in a loving caring environment

C) the COMMUNITY where the child lives
a child is as good as the community he/she lives in... so you can raise your children "at home" the best you can, but when they walk out the door and are faced/crawling with demons all day at school and/or befriend demons at school and/or are influenced by outside forces (social media etc) to become demons....then your children can go bad.

MrBrownJay1:
it all depends on:
A) the AGE of the child....
a child going bad at a very young age would be down to DNA, while a child going bad in his teen years could simply be down to puberty, friends and/or upbringing.

B) the FAMILY of the child...
a child raised in a violent negative environment will be different than a child raised in a loving caring environment

C) the COMMUNITY where the child lives
a child is as good as the community he/she lives in... so you can raise your children "at home" the best you can, but when they walk out the door and are faced/crawling with demons all day at school and/or befriend demons at school and/or are influenced by outside forces (social media etc) to become demons....then your children can go bad.

true about the DNA. Back in the days there’s this family everyone was sure nothing good can come out of it. Three generation of the family turned the same. But a girl child came out different. At a very young age she ran away from home several times because she knew she couldn’t fit in the family. A sound mind noticed and adviced they take her far away from home.


The truth is, pikin wey nor wan spoil nor go spoil. Society/upbringing or not.

doitforyou:
Classic nature vs nurture. They are intertwined and complementary, nurture shapes what nature has given.

apt!!

[s]

Staphylococcus:
Father.

[/s]

stupidity:
Parents are mostly blamed for the moral decadence in our society. Especially when it turns to be the girl child.


Is it really the child or the parents?

I grew up with an old woman that when she gives you food to eat and you complain that you want to eat something else. You MUST tell her how to get money to get you what you want to eat. At last you will eat the food with tears dropping inside the bowl, after collecting a brutal beating.

When she notices a kind of bad trait in you, she'll do anything to correct it.


In my thirties but still when I dish food to eat, I don't touch the meat till I finish my food. Meat that I bought with my own money. I remember the last time I stopped crying over meat was when I was around 7, it was a knife that was thrown at me and the knife injured me, it made me realize life is more precious than meat. Till today, meat and fish is like bonus to my food.


Growing up was very hostile but I look back and thank her because her corrections can not be forgotten. Some people as well grew up in this manner but turned out to be worse. Then we blame the upbringing.


Everyone grew up with or without proper guidance. But what you chose to do with your life is what matters. Is it for good or for worse?.

If it's for good, we applaud the parents for good up bringing, if it's for bad, we shame the parents for bad upbringing. Though this doesn't stop the fact that some parents are bad, but do you know some notable people grew up in a dysfunctional home? They witnessed all the bad parenting and endured till they could make a better decision for themselves.

If you know your right to your left, believe me your upbringing won't matter, what will matter is your morals.

Over to you readers. Who should take the blame when a child turns bad?

Pardon my write up. I'm not writer. Just expressing my thought.

EDITED: someone raised a motion. He said village people(devil) has their own role in the matter. This is true though. When I say true. It is TRUE.

What is your definition of bad?
From your story, I feel you weren't treated with love and that meat ting, to me, is poverty mentality.
You see, most people don't know training of kids is an art. It is not by scaring your kids or forcefully making them do things, that'd make them morally upright.
I am not a teacher, but my love for kids made me study kids for years. I was once a kid. Believe you me, regardless of what people think, I got severe physical and verbal beatings from my parents, as a kid. But it never deterred me from doing what I had in mind always. Why? Cause I adapted to the pain and punishment.
See, all kids are different, fam. That's what I noticed. I enjoy spending time with kids more than my own peers.
You don't need to be hostile to your kids in the name of trying to instill discipline in them.
Some kids go wayward not because they lack proper home training but because their parents don't believe in them and always expect the worst from them. So they use that mindset in the real world.

I will always love, cherish, adore, confide, cater, believe, Respect, bless, protect, correct and lead my future kids, the right way and God's way.

MY ADVICE TO PARENTS AND FUTURE PARENTS:
Hostility is not discipline. Correct your kids lovingly and always. Don't treat your kids like they're your enemies.

NockMedia:

What is your definition of bad?
From your story, I feel you weren't treated with love and that meat ting, to me, is poverty mentality.
You see, most people don't know training of kids is an art. It is not by scaring your kids or forcefully making them do things, that'd make them morally upright.
I am not a teacher, but my love for kids made me study kids for years. I was once a kid. Believe you me, regardless of what people think, I got severe physical and verbal beatings from my parents, as a kid. But it never deterred me from doing what I had in mind always. Why? Cause I adapted to the pain and punishment.
See, all kids are different, fam. That's what I noticed. I enjoy spending time with kids more than my own peers.
You don't need to be hostile to your kids in the name of trying to instill discipline in them.
Some kids go wayward not because they lack proper home training but because their parents don't believe in them and always expect the worst from them. So they use that mindset in the real world.

I will always love, cherish, adore, confide, cater, believe, Respect, bless, protect, correct and lead my future kids, the right way and God's way.

MY ADVICE TO PARENTS AND FUTURE PARENTS:
Hostility is not discipline. Correct your kids lovingly and always. Don't treat your kids like they're your enemies.

i will pretend I didn’t see the “poverty mentality” to avoid plenty talks.


So tell me about kids that was shown love and brought up in a very holy, well to do family but they turn bad? With all the art, mathematics, economics, religion, social studies, physics and chemistry(literally) combine the child still choses a wrong path.


Definition of “bad” here is when a child turns out to be what the society condemns.

stupidity:
i will pretend I didn’t see the “poverty mentality” to avoid plenty talks.


So tell me about kids that was shown love and brought up in a very holy, well to do family but they turn bad? With all the art, mathematics, economics, religion, social studies, physics and chemistry combine the child still choses a wrong path.


Definition of “bad” here is when a child turns out to be what the society condemns.

First off, don't mistake schooling for education.
You see, Humans are prone to mistakes. Even we adults and parents still make mistakes, from time to time.
Will you condemn a kid for making a mistake? No. But you should correct him/her.
How do you correct a kid?
You don't correct a kid with hostility. You need to correct a kid from a place of love. But if you as an adult isn't feeling loved and is frustrated one way or the other with your life, you transfer that aggression and frustrations on that kid, unknowingly.
Notice the way the whites and Asians discipline their kids and compare it to the way blacks do.
At the end of the day, which society churns out more criminals and wastemen? You know the answer.
To be honest, I wouldn't want to come back to this world as a black, not because of my skin colour or features but because of the Blackman's mentality. It's Primitive.

NockMedia:

First off, don't mistake schooling for education.
You see, Humans are prone to mistakes. Even we adults and parents still make mistakes, from time to time.
Will you condemn a kid for making a mistake? No. But you should correct him/her.
How do you correct a kid?
You don't correct a kid with hostility. You need to correct a kid from a place of love. But if you as an adult isn't feeling loved and is frustrated one way or the other with your life, you transfer that aggression and frustrations on that kid, unknowingly.
Notice the way the whites and Asians discipline their kids and compare it to the way blacks do.
At the end of the day, which society churns out more criminals and wastemen? You know the answer.
To be honest, I wouldn't want to come back to this world as a black, not because of my skin colour or features but because of the Blackman's mentality. It's Primitive.

lol. @ don't mistake schooling for education. I was been sarcastic with the subject list. Literally.


I get your point but I'm still telling you, in some cases, the child doesn't feel that love. Haven't you seen parents crying and asking where they gone wrong to deserve some children?

I'll still say it's the mindset. I had all the chance to practice and indulge in illegal stuffs while growing up. But I made sure I avoided those areas not because I was scared. I just didn't blend in. That wasn't me.

This is a simple question even though it seems complicated on the surface.

The first thing you should want to find out when you come across a 'bad' child, teenager, or adult.. is whether any of his/her parents was like that.

Any negative vice that a person is guilty of which his/her parents never engaged in, is certainly a result of their own misdirection.

the society

I will said majorly parents. Many parents forgot or did not know who they were growing up. Parents expect their children acts according to who they are and not who they were. Believe me, many children are replica of their parents but people don't know because the parents are grown and have undergone mental development due to experiences n exposure, training is like a way to improve who the child is and not to change him/her. I came from a family where mum was not really available(early death) and all what dad does is to just give us money to go to school and return then play around without any serious monitoring and I tell you non of us made trouble or grew haywire despite low care and attentions. Society does but our source matters. We grew to better what we inherited most times.