Did my primary 2 in yobe, a 7 year old and I can remember I did like a Fulani girl who was much taller than I was, she was probably 9, she was beautiful, and slim. Still have that memories. Don't know if it's wrong or right so I'll just read comments.

Youngsage:
Haha thank you! I thought I was the only one who figured something seemed odd.

Talk to your kids! Kids of these days are much more smarter and mature than kids have ever been.

A child came to you as a parent to express his thoughts? You should even be happy he came to talk to you in the first place, some won't. Talk to him, but don't hurt the kid

thats the main issue here.... most parents should want their children to be comfortable and feel safe in being fully honest with them and telling them anything, without being afraid to receive a beating. no wonder so many children are confiding with housegirls/boys and gateman.

Xcelinteriors:

Please tell me the things to tell him because I don't know. I really plan to flog that stupid feeling away from him when we get home

Flogging him will only make him worse in the future.

You failed to give us a background of your lifestyle. What kind of movies do you view at home? Does he join you in viewing these movies? What about his father? Is he playing an active role in his son's life? You should ask your son to describe the kind of feelings he has for the girl in his class. This is the only opportunity you have to redirect your son on the right path.

Mizwisdom:



Are you in Africa? what do you mean by there's nothing abnormal in telling his Mother/Father he likes a girl. Is that the reason he goes to school? the child is clearly distracted and this will cause poor academic performance. It's not normal in our culture. He's not even a teenager but he's bold enough to tell his parent that he likes a beautiful girl

Telling his mother how he feels about the girl shows his innocence. Shutting him down, flogging him will only make him get worse in the future.

Xcelinteriors:

Please tell me the things to tell him because I don't know. I really plan to flog that stupid feeling away from him when we get home

People still think sex education is only for the boy child.
The boy has his mind filled with things he has seen from movies and other channels. He thinks when a boy sees a beautiful girl, it's a normal thing for him to declare his feelings, he doesn't know there are right ages and circumstances for boy to meet girl.

This is why his mind needs to be redirected by you. You let him know the feeling he has is not the right one, not even strong enough for what he perceives. Madam what he has is crush common among today's kids. Hope you have not allowed your emotions to make him withdrawn ever from you as far as sexualities are concerned. If you still need what to say to him, send a mail to uneedtotalk40@gmail.com.

Sixfeetbelle:


Ayii! Men ooh. Which kain human species una be? Why would a father be encouraging such thing on a boy this young?

you think u would notice as a wifey?

Robnectar:



you think u would notice as a wifey?

I pray not to cause na fire and brimstone I go raise for house that day on top father and son. 9 year old catching feelings and toasting girls?! Walahi

Sixfeetbelle:


I pray not to cause na fire and brimstone I go raise for house that day on top father and son. 9 year old catching feelings and toasting girls?! Walahi

u won't even notice d conversation btwn father and son, just take am easy

Xcelinteriors:
So this morning I was in the office with my son and he said mum, there's something he want to ask and I should promise not to get angry and I told him to ask anything

Then he drop the bombshell, he said there's this girl he like in his class, I opened my mouth for like few seconds and don't know what to say. I asked him how did he know he like the girl and he told me since the day he stepped into that school he has developed feelings for the girl. Inside me I was shouting blood of Jesus but pretend everything is fine

I said ok can you tell me why you like the girl? He said the girl is intelligent and beautiful. I did not even know what to tell him honestly but am not happy at all and I really want to deal with him when we get home. Please mummies and daddies, how do I handle this

You sound very trigger happy, what is a "bombshell" about a 9 year old liking his mate.

This is a very sensitive age for your boy, and your actions will determine a lot in his future. I beg you in the name of God, do not lay a hand on that boy. Haba! Aunty you fall hand o!
You want to deal with him because he likes a girl , you're not even saying anything about teaching him sex education, the first thing to come to your mind is to "deal" with him.
You sef reason am na!

Robnectar:



u won't even notice d conversation btwn father and son, just take am easy

You're right that I won't notice the conversation but he's still my son and his behaviour and association with other kids will cue me in on what's up. And if when asked he mentions his father,...

Hehehe. Let that day come first

Sixfeetbelle:


You're right that I won't notice the conversation but he's still my son and his behaviour and association with other kids will cue me in on what's up. And if when asked he mentions his father,...

Hehehe. Let that day come first

sounds like u will raise hell that day

lucky you...your child opens up to you...just talk to him about how to deal with the feelings..don't try to be harsh o...u might push him away

Are you mad?

Not only is that evil, but he also will NEVER trust you again.

Xcelinteriors:

Please tell me the things to tell him because I don't know. I really plan to flog that stupid feeling away from him when we get home

What is there to 'correct'??

This is just as bad. Don't over-react to this, it is a natural process. Just check in with him every week or 2 weeks in passing.

greatme2good:
I hope you didn't flog that boy when you got home coz if you did, you have closed every form of closeness he has with you. Just correct him with love.

And he will grow up thinking of girls/women as the 'other'. HE is unlikely to believe in gender equality. Just because you were too stupid and shy to talk with your son about your son's real feelings.

Even if you tell him to forget about the girl. What makes you think he will? What should he do when he likes somebody else?

Ishilove:

There is absolutely NOTHING wrong with what your child is feeling. He is having his first childhood crush and beating him will discourage him from opening up to you. Your baby is very vocal, unlike us who expressed our feelings by constantly cussing and fighting with our crush.

What you should do is gently discourage him from exploring his tender feelings for his classmate. Just let him know that liking the girl is not bad, but let it end there. When he is older he can be friends with her but for now good girls and boys must always 'mind their business', get good grades and become useful members of the society

What happens if he still likes her? What happens when he likes somebody else? Do you think he will share such info with you?

You are pushing him to the internet which will ultimately lead him to porn.

Orestino:
Flog him for opening up at your own peril! that will be the last time he'd open up to you about anything.

[s]Best bet is to tactically talk him out of it making him see reasons why he shouldn't have such feelings at such tender age!
[/s]
Best of luck

cooooooks:
And he will grow up thinking of girls/women as the 'other'. HE is unlikely to believe in gender equality. Just because you were too stupid and shy to talk with your son about your son's real feelings.

Even if you tell him to forget about the girl. What makes you think he will? What should he do when he likes somebody else?

Stop foisting adult complexities on little kids. Kids have their own way of handling strong emotions.

Enoch07:

when I say abnormal, I mean for a 9yrs old bold enough to tell his mum he likes a girl omo it's not normal

So because he told her. Is it now better he tells his friends and they advice him wrongly rather than her so she can show him the way

Mizwisdom:




The world is corrupt especially with easy access to internet and white culture. My advice is for you to censor what he watches, ask his Teacher to monitor him, give him enough house chores to humble him, increase his daily assignments, buy him more books and encourage him to build a reading culture instead of exposing him to internet and television. You should regulate his exposure to them

Regulating his exposure won't exactly help. When he gets into Uni he would want to try it all. Don't get me wrong, its important to regulate his exposure but increasing house chores and assignment won't work.
When he grows up he will tend to hate his mother.

@OP now is the time to teach your child sex education...you clearly haven't done that. Tell him the basics and don't lie to him.
Tell him that sex is sweet but its only for married people. Tell him he should not allow a girl see his dick and not put finger in any girls thing. Tell him the truth now its still early, because if you don't and school resumes, His friends will notice his crushing and start giving him advice.

If your son goes to a 'big man school', tell him everything you should now he is talking to you. Create time for him everyday and tell him to gist you everything and congratulate him for listening to your advice. Also start praying for him more than before. Your boy is arriving puberty and would soon start crushing on girls anyhow, anything you do now will determine whether he draws close to you or runs away from you,

OP try not to push him away now unless it will take God for him to come back. I'm talking from experience ooh

I was about 10years when I came out open like your son and my parents lied,they kept mixing up things for me, telling me all sorts of lies. As soon as I found out they were lies I stopped listening to them and starting doing things my way. It was soo bad that my first sex was in Js2 1st term.

Also Don't always resort to flogging when he breaks rules now he is small. Sometimes sit down and talk to him, if you flog him everytime, he would start resenting you with time. Even if you must flog him sit down and talk with him and tell him why you did it.
I don't know why I'm pouring out my heart like this but please do the right thing let your son not turn out like me a few years back. Treat him right and you will not regret it...

About regulating his exposure, monitor what he watches and also what you watch when he is around. If you are a fan of Telenovelas and the likes, don't watch it when he is around. If you pursue him inside to watch it yourself, he will be curious and he will come back later to watch 'that thing mum doesn't want him to watch...' And after watching, he will want to experiment.

Sorry for the long read. Have a lovely day and goodluck with raising your children

build his moral Standard