Mr joker
1. Nigerian Dad would turn on NTA and sleep. He won't wake up oh, but once you change the channel, that's when you'll hear: "Put it back my friend"
2. Really love my Bae, even if her Dad warns me never to step my foot into his compound i will go with wheelchair
3. Is it wrong to sanitize ur neighbors chicken wit hot water and then quarantine it in ur fridge??
4. I entered Bike early today and the Okada man was singing; "if I die make una no cry for me" Oga please make I come down. I am yet to make it in life
5. Chai, ATM queue wahala....Yesterday afternoon at First Bank's ATM, a girl walked up to me and said, "Please sir I'm in front of your back". Out of annoyance I replied, " Come and stay in the centre of my front".
6. It's when your subscription finish you'll remember that you have games in your phone, that's when you'll discover your talent in playing candy crush...Some people will even turn to engineers , they'll go to settings on their phone and scatter everything...Data is life
7. My mum be like "I'm talking and you are quiet"
Me: but mummy.....
Mum: Keep quiet I'm talking and you are talking...
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8. I made 2million naira in one week. How did you do it? Very Simple. "If you can think it, you can do it" Motivational speakers are mad i swear
9. Once am married, I will have 2 kids, 8 sons, 7 daughters, 5 children, 3 babies and 1 pikin
10. Being hated is nothing new to me. I once appeared on the list of noise makers when I was absent from school. They said it was the echo from my noise yesterday that they heard that day.
11. I almost jumped out of the bus window today when one slay queen said "please increase the volume of the window, heat is hitting" . I swear her English almost hit me out of the window.
12. It's only African parents that will advice you for 6hours and still tell you "I don't have much to say"
13. When your mum is chasing ‍‍♂you with belt,and she falls down Just know that it is over for you, your own Don finish patapata be that, just beg God to blow the trumpet
14. U are in a bus and suddenly the driver shouts, Am tired of this life! Be honest what will you do? As for me ooo I would jump to the nearest ocean I hate rough play
15. When they want to give us drugs as a kid.
American Mom: Open Your Mouth.
Nigerian Mum: Do Aaahh Hahahhaahah
16. Even Rats sef want to be among the richest animals, a rat entered my room, instead of going to where I kept my crayfish and dry fish, its was heading towards my 50 naira.... Na kill I kill am �
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17. Hey! Stop asking me if am single . Do i look double to you
18. I'm just imagining the kind of hunger that hooked the person that discovered coconut could be eaten *
19. Before the # CORONAVIRUS if you sneez people around would say God Bless you
buh if you sneez lasan this period in a public place.......... Ohhh my God yah dead
20. Main reason why I haven't travelled abroad is if I get chased by a dog that dosen't understand kai... kaii... kaiii....
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21. What date did buhari announced the first lockdown? I want to calculate something.
Somebody wants to put pregnancy on me
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22. When will native doctors do their own giveaway?
Even if it's one fowl,we don't mind