cutedharmee:

You totally misunderstood the message he was trying to pass across. But candidly those point of his is nothing but the truth. Take it or leave it.

It is not the truth you sick man.

My saphire with different monikers having conversations with herself, lol.

Why? And we really want to curb Female rape?

Do you know that most male rapist are psychologically disturb lots,some of whom form their sexual orientations from past molestations by Aunties and Maids ? A molested male child will grow to be a rapist because that was what he was exposed to while growing (although not in all cases) But it is interwoven.

Until we are able to read what goes on in a Rapist mind we may never be able to find solutions. The best we will all do is to scream and rant like what we have been seeing everywhere.

We need to fight RAPE across all genders ! And yes Men get rape too!

Very true...

Hate it that women always want to pose as victims ....
When we are ready to deal with rape we'll deal with it ..as for now let's keep claiming victims just because we are women

-

Here's the truth to all these, unless you all can seat and reason logically and not emotionally,you or rather We may never overcome this societal problem Rape or at least have a reduction in rape cases. Unless you lots go beyond ranting, typing long Epistles on social media or engaging in baseless arguments on Nl (which ends after few days and everyone goes back to their normal lives) We may never head anywhere.

When I saw Vera thread ,I was close to tears.It hurts and no one deserves that. But has that ever changed the fact that such is likely to happen again? It will, and like "We" always do, There will be uproar, we will rant, create threads,type theoritically correct Epistles, celebrities will REACT,Pastors will pray, Offenders would be punished and then we will go back to our normal lives until another case of million cases finds it's way on the internet again then we will have a repetition of the whole process.Please who are we decieving? . Until we understand the roots and address the issue, We may never get anywhere. And since most perpetrators are MEN. Isn't it wise to try to get into the minds of these people then profer solutions rather than issue unrealistic commands Online? Or getting to understand why they do what they do than create gender wars and man hating threads and opinions? I wonder where it has all got us all these years.


The world is bad enough, bad people are everywhere both Men and Women. Getting all emotional and spewing words that only last a moment won't get us ANYWHERE!

Been over a year but I just couldn't resist commenting. Too much sense lives here. Wisdom!

safarigirl:


We Appreciate All The Sensible Men That Are Standing With Us In These Times. We Appreciate All The Men That Are Not Quick To Pick Offense And Attack Us For Speaking Out. Plenty May Be Useless, But There Will Always Be Those Who Have Sense.

Rape won't stop until we change our approach to prosecution in this country.

When a thief is caught, his family members come to your house and plead till you accept. If you don't accept, the whole town gives you a bad name for prosecuting someone who caused you pain.

The same goes for rape. I've heard many cases like that. The guy goes to beg the girl's parents and then they ask (read coerce) the girl to forgive the guy.

When a criminal is caught, people should stop begging on their behalf. Even if they'll beg, they shouldn't castigate anyone that doesn't accept the plea.

Twoclans:


They have already started mentioning male rape,some are even asking why she had to go to the church at such an ungodly hour to read as if they were there when it all happened.

In as much as I fear rape and understand the scar it can cause my greatest fear is for people who are rape apologist and enablers. They are everywhere on nairaland and to imagine that nairaland is to some extent a reflection of the society we find ourselves .Waohhh

I just have this funny feeling the rapist is on nairaland.. This behaviour from majority of the male monikers cannot be ordinary .

I'm yet to see anyone support rape here. Stop saying what isn't.

You girls want men to support you against rape and rapists but you're always codedly calling all men rapists or at least potential rapists.

And, yes, women should learn to comport themselves. It's the bitter fact. Take it or leave.

Does advising someone to keep their money in the bank make one a theft enabler?

Does advising parents to watch the kind of programs their kids watch make one a promiscuity enabler?

Does manufacturing locks for houses and cars make companies theft enablers?

Does asking customers to keep their pins and account details secret make banks scam enablers?

So, how does asking women to dress modestly, avoid ungodly hours and seclusion with the opposite sex make one a rape enabler?

How? A honest question.

Even ugly girls dey follow shout rape. What normal man can look you in the face and still have the confidence to rape you?

Dem dey rape chimpanzee? Mtcheeeeew!

Afrobasic:


Same to all your children. Both male and female would be raped violently to death. May you weep uncontrollably all the days of your life.

Disgusting Vermin.

your mouth has spoken your portion and so shall it be.

Twoclans:


They have already started mentioning male rape,some are even asking why she had to go to the church at such an ungodly hour to read as if they were there when it all happened.

In as much as I fear rape and understand the scar it can cause my greatest fear is for people who are rape apologist and enablers. They are everywhere on nairaland and to imagine that nairaland is to some extent a reflection of the society we find ourselves .Waohhh

I just have this funny feeling the rapist is on nairaland.. This behaviour from majority of the male monikers cannot be ordinary .

the perpetrators turned out to be a woman

-

Make una getat!
Na only una dem dey rape? Always making noise, seeking attention & using victim mentality.

Generalnomercy:
@op, you've spoken well, However, women, ladies, girls should also respect themselves and be responsible for once.

Insecurity is insecurity everywhere in the world irrespective of male or female involvement.

It's not about the men but about common sense and fallen moral standards.


You will always find girls at the wrong place, in the wrong companies.

You will always finds girls doing what they're not supposed to be doing.

Like the girl's case in Benin, NOTHING, I MEAN NOTHING SHOULD HAVE TAKEN HER TO THAT SHRINE/CHURCH AT THAT UNGODLY HOUR, THE TRUTH BE TOLD.


MY SISTERS, NO MAN WILL EVER RAPE A GIRL IN AN OPEN PLACE, THE GIRL MAY HAVE GONE TO WHERE SHE SHOULD HAVE AVOIDED BEFORE RAPE CAN OCCUR.


GIRLS USE YOUR COMMON SENSE TO PREVENT RAPE.

GOD SAVE ALL !!!

stop giving dumb advise - u are a rapist sympathizer probably even a rapist - you people use this type of trash so you can justify whatever evil you get up to .
Do you not even sound stupid.to yourself - "no man will rape a girl.in an open place" - fyi a large number of rapes occur in women's homes - by brothers , cousin, friends , uncles etc . and. diots like you will still be yarning trash .Shut the fvck up please . Bloody rape apologist .

Afrobasic:


For you.

Yes for you. Amen. if you reply again, you hasten the coming to pass of the curse for you.

Ladyhippolyta88:
Op well said.

I feel devastated when reading the news about women and girl who get raped.
This rape culture and wanting to shame the victim instead of the perpetrator encourages rape because the lowlifes think they can get away with it.

We really need to reorientate our men and young boys growing up that they are not entitled to a woman's body without her consent.
Nigerian men should call themselves to order they have no right to abuse women.

Rapist should be made to face the music.
To rape apologist or enablers remember you have female relatives among you and you will not want them to live in fear that their human dignity is being insulted so instead of justifying rape acts denounce them and report them.

we should also teach our girls nt to be entitled to a man's/boy's money.

It's sad.

Rape is as despicable as any crime could be, and should be fought by the collective effort of everyone in the society.

Unfortunately, people have let their emotions get in the way of their reasoning and use the 'misopportunity' such an ignoble act provides, to wear the crown of victimhood while they slander and demonize every member of the male gender.

Others have used this same 'misopportunity' to apportion blames to the victims who deserve all the help they can get.

I feel sad.

The OP raised valid points in her post (and subsequent rebuttals), but it was easy (too easy) to notice how much she let sentiments get in her way.

I have also observed with despair, the vile insults many have hurled at each other on a thread as sensitive as this one.

Shame! Shame on you all!

To everyone with helpful suggestions females could use to protect themselves from being rape victims, keep that advice to yourself, your sisters and your daughters. Your advice won't bring the change and healing our society desires.

To everyone who believes every man is a guilty rapist until proven innocent, keep your assumptions to yourself, your brothers and your sons. Your assumptions won't deliver the peace and safety our society desires.

Do all you can to conquer evil. But be careful, lest you become another evil that needs conquering.

Ladyhippolyta88:
Do women and girls plan to get raped?So how exactly should they be responsible in this context.You are sounding like a rape enabler.

The topic is about rape and women are mostly the victims even men also but women are more disadvantaged and get shamed for being raped your comment is a clear example.

It is being perpetrated by men so it is about them and their failed moral standard and lack of commonsense.Is there a venue to where rapist are found that you are saying they find themselves in wrong places.


Uncle what are they supposed to be doing? Are you to tell them what to do.So in the closed place they are in women should not feel safe abi?Instead of you to denounce these rapisr you are busy sounding like a rape apologist and blaming women?what right do they have to rape and kill her.What are you saying abeg?So she cannot even feel safe in church the house of God again so where exactly can a woman feel safe in this country.I am lost for words with what I am reading.I am yet to see where you have condemned rape culture in Nigeria ooo.

NO GOD WILL SAVE YOU FIRST

You should be saved first so that people with your line of reasoning will not be justified to rape people since it is the lady's fault for being there in the first place.
Mtcheww

it's like complaining about thieves robbing people and not advising them to lock up their doors at night.

There will always be rapists in our midst and society....that dude is asking women to take responsibility for their own safety as well. It's akin to protecting your house because there will always be thieves.

Stop reasoning with your emotions. Protect yourself and do your part

* Stay the f*uck away from the assemblage of men. It doesn't even speak well of you.

* I don't see why you're in a man's room or passing the night there if you're not dating. It makes you look loose.

* No one should go out at night male or female. It's a real risk even for the male.

As far as I'm concerned this is a blame thread encouraged by a mod.

See as una dey heap blames with this double PhD thesis but nowhere una even educate girls on how to dress or behave or protect themselves. It's a blame thread all right.

I'll like to ask: why don't women like taking responsibility?

Generalnomercy:



It's your choice to live a carefree life and you pay the price.

You hate advice but the same you also blame men, why?

Go wear your thinking cap to enable your common sense because it appears deactivated.

You can as well go to an uncompleted building in your neighborhood to study by midnight today, come back tommorow and blame men.

Common sense should teach you that safety comes first. Have you not been visiting different men ? Did they rape you? That's to show you that not "all men" are rapists, the same way not " all women" live a carefree life.

Since there is no way to identify a rapist, the best way is to be cautious, but unfortunately the breed of females we have in this age always throw caution to the wind.

Inasmuch as I discourage such wicked act, the women should take responsibility for once.

Women should propose stringent laws against rape of both sexes and sponsor it at the national assembly.

Rape cases have always ended up in favour of the rapists, do you know why?

Position of the law is simple: "WHY DID YOU GO THERE IF YOU DON'T " WANT" IT?

YOU AS A WOMAN, HAVE TO PROVE BEYOND EVERY REASONABLE DOUBT THAT IT WAS NOT CONSENSUAL.

My NGO have been fighting for woman with such cases for over ten years now and I know the resources that has gone into that, and from my experience, Prevention remains the best law for now.

INDEED YOU NEED HELP OF GOD.

its quite obvious what you are - it's just sad that you have the audacity.and the lack of shame.to come to be justifying yourself and your fellow bros in the business . Useless fellow
Pls close down your useless NGO . No woman needs an irresponsible advocate who will be blaming her for her own rape . This your dirty mindset should not be found anywhere.near an NGO for women , abeg .

Ishilove:
Nobody should even mention male rape here.

Men gets raped too. It is the honest truth.

BigJoe19:
Until you women stand up against women raping young boys and men I could give zero fvcks if women are raped, you women thought them how to rape remember, starting from when you women touch the small boys sexually.

Zero fvcks given, zero fvcks taken. If you don't like my post you can commit suicide

oga mi , how many women have you raped ? This ur situation is not an "if " it is a "when "

BigJoe19:
This girl, you too get sense, leave all these emotional women alone, let them keep ranting, let them not tackle the root of the problem. I laugh at their stupidity

big joe , why are you so invested in something you obviously do not care about ? This must be a " catch me if you can " scenario . Have you raped any girls recently ?.

I know of a case and heard of another where a Guy was gang raped till he FAINTED! Two cases. They could have died. But then you know what my reaction was then? I laughed! Yea.... I laughed and asked what led the man there. And I was told one was a bike man who went to ask for his pay when the lady he took delayed in returning. This thing happen but because the society like I did will laugh at such occurrence most are covered.

Now if you understand what rape victim pass through, you will understand why we have lots of rapist around. The only difference is, Most female rape victims do not have the exact strength to inflict on their counterparts what they went through, a luxury the Males enjoy. See I'm not downplaying Female rape, it's gruesome and not a nice experience.But I just believe we ought to do away with these emotional outbursts we see everywhere when such case happen and seek real solutions. That's my point.

you laughed when you heard someone was raped ? But ur here telling people not to be emotional - we should all be laughing like you , right?

BigBashiru:

It is not the truth you sick man.

You have a very big problem. Must u insult everyone? Anyway dah shows d stuff u made of. Bye �

BigJoe19:
Women laugh at men who get raped, women are not saints they just hate being on the victim but like being the perpetrators of the wickedness, spare us your sermons, if you can't speak about males getting raped, then you are not against rape, you are just a bloody attention seeker.

this is a fvcking LIE ! It is men that laugh at men who talk about being raped .

Nigerian women, call yourself to order. Reduce the number of bastards.

My anger? Well perhaps I'm annoyed at the constant uproar that follows rape without effect, I'm annoyed by EMPTY emotional bickerings that happens here when the outside world is as silent as graveyard, I'm annoyed by the "Captain save women's rights" most ladies do on Nl while they shiver and hide under their beds offline. I'm angered by constant fights that happens here , the chest beating, the mouth making by resident Feminists here while most go offline taking safety precautions, I'm annoyed by the pathetic "Me against the Men" ideologies displayed here often by some ladies while in the real world it's something else. I'm displeased at how most Nl feminist mislead young people, when they are suppose to teach safety and empower themselves you see them barking. Perhaps if op has instructed ladies to always walk with a teaser or papper spray, I would have seen the sense but no. The command is to the Men. Visual Men!

You know I find it amusing that some lady will come to dish instructions like this to Virtual Men, Men in a society who are hardly trained Responsibility and Respect. Men who are mostly informed to be Lord and that they can have whatever they want.
I find it amusing that no one is talking about Male Child Molestation or Male rape when that and other factors are responsible for what we are experiencing here.
I find it amusing that no one is advising women to pay equal attention to all children especially when it comes to sexuality. But no, isn't the attention on the female child because she has a womb and bride price on her.
I find it both annoying and amusing that instead on us to focus on preaching and teaching kindness and goodness across genders we are busying issuing command cheques to some individuals
And no one is talking about freedom, relaxing problematic societal rules and norms for all genders.

Babe I'm angry! Very angry!

you are here talking about " visual men " you are a fvcking rape apologist. So becos a man has two eyes he is an uncontrollable animal It's this trash talk that justifies rape ..dont be hiding your support for rapists under big grammar and intellectualism - come.out and support rapists with your full chest , abeg

Do men walk around with dicks in hand looking for women to rape?
I don't get the whole bullshit about rape. AND RAPE IS TERRIBLY EVIL.
Yes, there are rapist but not up to 2% of men are rapists. it's like every other crime, so what's all the exaggeration and generalization about?
Besides remember where we are in the age of #Me Too, where a woman can use here leg and go to a man's house, use her hand to remove her clothes, have consensual sex and then turn around and call it rape.... just because she did not enjoy it or may be something happens after the sex that she does not like.
So OP, I don't know where you live on earth but ALL MEN ARE NOT RAPISTS, MOST MEN ARE NOT RAPISTS but like every crime only a few lunatics on the fringes are rapists.
I don't get calling ALL NIGERIAN men out for a nonsense that does not make sense to the majority of men. And overwhelming majority of men ARE NOT RAPISTS.
I am not a rapist and I don't even know a single rapist, therefore, I take exception to your clout chasing generalization about Nigerian men being rapists.
if you live in a rapists den then i advice you to get out but don't come here creating a rather useless thread calling out ALL NIGERIAN men for a crime that MOST NIGERIAN MEN HATE.
We are not talking about the usual attitude of Nigerian women thinking of eating a man's hard earned money and calling him mugu while all the while dangling sex as a bait.
Please enjoy your fame for chasing clout... I HATE RAPE, I HATE RAPISTS, I DON'T RAPE and I am a proud NIGERIAN MAN.
Stop with all that #Me Too shit and the victims mentality. Call your fucking self to order not ALL NIGERIAN MEN... mtcheew

NIGERIAN MEN DON'T NEED A NONSENSE, UNFOUNDED, GENERALISED FALSE ACCUSATION TO KNOW THAT RAPE IS TERRIBLE - Atleast, there is no man that does not have a woman in his life. And I am yet to see a man who enjoys having the women in his life getting raped.

Abeg ooo abegoo, this is how you people will start this nonsense about believe all women as if women are angels levitating over the rest of us mortals.

CALL OUT THE SPECIFIC PERSON THAT RAPED YOU OR COMMITTED THE RAPE, NOT ALL NIGERIAN MEN!

Magnoliaa:

Men KNOW. They KNOW. They are just comfortable with the statues quo. It is frankly a waste of advocacy for women to channel energies into educating them and making them aware. If they wanted to be ''enlightened'' on women's plights, they'd be. They simply are just disagreeing with you here for the same of it. Better for one to be completely pro-women than waste time on these lots.

pocohantas:


End of discussion!

Perhaps,
it's all about the rage.

safarigirl:
LOL

Not a thread from last year making it to Front Page now.

Something wey I don do forget, y'all want to now bring late outrage.


Anyway, you guys enjoy the RageFest.

You can't keep up, the energy is dead less than a year. Glad you now LOL.
Look at them up there, that's your motive.