I Was Chosen As King: Should I Damn The Consequence Or Forget About It Entirely? - Family - Nairaland
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| I Was Chosen As King: Should I Damn The Consequence Or Forget About It Entirely? by JONNYSPUTE(m): 8:51am On Jun 23, 2020 |
....Good morning folks. Sure we are all good and managing the effects of pandemic well?. To God be the glory. This is going to be long because I will want us to read and understand it very well before commenting. Reason is because any decision taken is going to affect both myself,my immediate family members, extended and the entire community. I have been thinking about the way forward since December last year. It happened that we lost our king (Eze) 5years ago and the community has been in turmoil due to the inability of the elders to select a new king. Reason is that it is rotational between my village and the other village. My village is now supposed to bring out the next king and my compound has been told to bring out somebody to be crowned as a king. I never envisaged or dreamt of becoming a king in my life because. (1) My father is still alive. (2)I'm not the most senior in the entire family. But then,the elders met me last December and told me that the diety in the community has selected me to become the next king and that I have to pick another wife from the community before I will be crowned. I told them point and blank that the oracle is mistaken due to the reasons I mentioned above but they are not taking it. Now everyone in my village is against me for refusing the offer and saying I'm doing it be cause I don't want to hurt my wife which is true. Now my question is,What do I do? Should I damn the consequence and pick another wife and be crowned a king in other to make my community happy or should I forget about the whole idea entirely and allow the community sort themselves out? I'm confused here. N B. My wife is aware of all this. Thanks. Please bring this to front page cause I'm no longer myself. So many sleepless nights and selfish advices from the elders in my community. I really need to hear the truth from people I don't know. 54 Likes 6 Shares |
| Re: I Was Chosen As King: Should I Damn The Consequence Or Forget About It Entirely? by qeemus: 8:58am On Jun 23, 2020 |
Hmm 5 Likes 4 Shares |
| Re: I Was Chosen As King: Should I Damn The Consequence Or Forget About It Entirely? by correctyourself(m): 8:58am On Jun 23, 2020 |
Seriously, first of all just as you explained here discuss it with your wife and her acceptance will go along way to help you make decision. 160 Likes 6 Shares |
| Re: I Was Chosen As King: Should I Damn The Consequence Or Forget About It Entirely? by annex1: 9:02am On Jun 23, 2020 |
Emem Isong, kunle Afolayan, Tunde Kelani would be interested in this script  I can tell you really love your wife. What is her opinion on this? If it doesnt sit well with her as it doesnt with you then stand your ground. Besides what kind of "king making" requires you to compulsorily take another wife. Tell them your own Deity has prohibited you from marrying another wife. But only accept if madam is fine with it for the sake of peace in your family and community. Because your responsibility is first to your wife, family and thirdly, the community. 387 Likes 9 Shares |
| Re: I Was Chosen As King: Should I Damn The Consequence Or Forget About It Entirely? by JONNYSPUTE(m): 9:06am On Jun 23, 2020 |
annex1:....Been doing this all this while and because of this,I ve not been to the village since December to see my parents. They all come over to my base now to see me.My wife has not said anything about it since and I can understand her.Even my Dad is confused cause such has never happened. You can't crown me a king while my father is alive..My father and I feels there's a conspiracy against us. 256 Likes 8 Shares |
| Re: I Was Chosen As King: Should I Damn The Consequence Or Forget About It Entirely? by ecolime(m): 9:08am On Jun 23, 2020 |
annex1:Nice story line. I like it 20 Likes 5 Shares |
| Re: I Was Chosen As King: Should I Damn The Consequence Or Forget About It Entirely? by bukatyne(f): 9:10am On Jun 23, 2020 |
We need to ascertain some issues: 1. Are you interested in the Kingship? 2. What is your wife's opinion on the Kingship? 3. What leverage do you have in this situation? i.e. If you don't become the king, what happens? 4. What leverage does the village have over you? If you refuse their kingship, what can they stop you from achieving? 5. If you are interested in the kingship and have some sort of leverage, do you have the mental strength to insist it is done your way: kingship with no second wife? 241 Likes 11 Shares |
| Re: I Was Chosen As King: Should I Damn The Consequence Or Forget About It Entirely? by Macphenson: 9:13am On Jun 23, 2020 |
Honestly speaking, in as much as enlightened, educated and exposed we are, we still have our traditions as Africans. It is indeed a difficult situation you find yourself , and a tough decision to make. But the truth is you have to face reality. In such a situation where it is you and the community, I will advise you take the kingship, it is an honour for you to be chosen,and trust me your generations yet unborn will be proud of you. It.is also a rare and great priviledge for you to render service to your people , and for you to also write your name in gold. As for your wife, this is where you have a challenge. No woman wants to share her man. Please appeal to her that ordinarily you want to be with only her, but circumstances have changed everything, also reach out to her family first, and present your case to them. That's a sign of respect and regards for them. As long as it is the dictates of the tradition, overtime they will understand but not without certain reservations and concerns. Let them.understand that your taking another wife is absolutely circumstancial and not intentional. Please take up this rare priviledge of serving you people. My own personal request is this Please place the interest of your subjects at heart while on the throne. Be a father to them. Don't be like our present day political "Ezes". 239 Likes 17 Shares |
| Re: I Was Chosen As King: Should I Damn The Consequence Or Forget About It Entirely? by Righteousness89(m): 9:18am On Jun 23, 2020 |
My Brother! If you will take up the Post, your Faith should be a Paramount Factor. Don't allow any other form of god or diety to make u do what you should not! Respectfully Tell your people that you will Accept the throne but that things will be done in a Christian way. You Respectfully tell them what your faith stands for. If they Accept, Good! If they do not, then Respectfully decline them Position is not a Qualification for Eternal Life.. 419 Likes 35 Shares |
| Re: I Was Chosen As King: Should I Damn The Consequence Or Forget About It Entirely? by Artiiclebeast: 9:19am On Jun 23, 2020 |
JONNYSPUTE: Wow.. God is great oh. Na so I take become king friend oh. Jonnyspute, na me oh, your mainest paddy. I dey park my kaya come Rivers State oh na me go be your Abobaku. I no mind to help you marry the second wife ask dem if that one go work. If e too hard make you tell madam to just pick who she dey comfortable with just to fulfil all righteousness plus showing her how much you respect her. Are you fed up with the status quo Nigeria is today? Join us here https://www.nairaland.com/5942435/nigerian-youths-lets-get-together Search and join our telegram group (nigerianyouthsaretired) 38 Likes 1 Share |
| Re: I Was Chosen As King: Should I Damn The Consequence Or Forget About It Entirely? by VirginFinder: 9:23am On Jun 23, 2020 |
Righteousness89: 1 Like |
| Re: I Was Chosen As King: Should I Damn The Consequence Or Forget About It Entirely? by JONNYSPUTE(m): 9:25am On Jun 23, 2020 |
bukatyne:.....Thank you for bringing this up. (1) I'm not interested and have never thought or dreamt of being a king in my life.Even though I would have loved to but I can't due to my wife, my kids,never wanted a polygamous family because of its endless fight after my demise. My wife simply told me to do what I wanted, though she herself doesn't buy the idea of me becoming a king. This your third point is exactly where i and my father has talked extensively and he has assured me that nothing will happen if I refused and I believed him. He said traditionally it is very wrong for a father to bow for a son as the king and that is why he believed that there's a conspiracy against us because he is also the president General of my community. I don't think they can stop me from achieving anything now except they will want to be at war with my entire family. Your last question is the bone of contention. They said throughout the history,that every king must marry from the community and since my wife is from another state,that I should pick up a wife from our community. 26 Likes 1 Share |
| Re: I Was Chosen As King: Should I Damn The Consequence Or Forget About It Entirely? by JONNYSPUTE(m): 9:27am On Jun 23, 2020 |
Macphenson:... I won't lie to you. I'm so so so confused here. 2 Likes |
| Re: I Was Chosen As King: Should I Damn The Consequence Or Forget About It Entirely? by Ningen(m): 9:31am On Jun 23, 2020 |
It's your life. Why should other people dictate how you live? Don't be miserable just to make others happy. Besides, you'll probably make a bad leader. Because your ideals and beliefs are against it. 61 Likes 2 Shares |
| Re: I Was Chosen As King: Should I Damn The Consequence Or Forget About It Entirely? by JONNYSPUTE(m): 9:31am On Jun 23, 2020 |
Artiiclebeast:....Nawa you ooo. Is not an easy decision to make.A dilemma |
| Re: I Was Chosen As King: Should I Damn The Consequence Or Forget About It Entirely? by Artiiclebeast: 9:33am On Jun 23, 2020 |
JONNYSPUTE: I can imagine the dilemma. From your narrative, I suspect a conspiracy to humiliate your popsy through you. Never mess with those old village people wey get wicked native intelligence oh, na the people wey Oshiomole learn work from oh. You can imagine people wey go Siddon come plan say if person die na so so part from the cow you go give dem, and anytime wey cow meat hungry dem na to look for one.person kpai so that burial go fit happen. Dem go even come inspect the cow/goat tozo or blokos to know whether e gallant. Abi na the one wey dem go say if man die na him brother go inherit the woman? Abi na some wey go tell you say na first son go inherit all him papa property? All their rules na always selfish and self-serving ones. 52 Likes 3 Shares |
| Re: I Was Chosen As King: Should I Damn The Consequence Or Forget About It Entirely? by FlordFlorez(m): 9:38am On Jun 23, 2020 |
Seek ur wife's opinion first. But this's very ironical. One man's food is another's poison. Many people have died/fought over this same throne u're rejecting oh. 12 Likes |
| Re: I Was Chosen As King: Should I Damn The Consequence Or Forget About It Entirely? by Kendumazy(m): 10:08am On Jun 23, 2020 |
This is dicey. Just wondering what is their plans in not choosing your father but you? Just wondering! 7 Likes |
| Re: I Was Chosen As King: Should I Damn The Consequence Or Forget About It Entirely? by JONNYSPUTE(m): 10:11am On Jun 23, 2020 |
Kendumazy:.... Same thing I'm wondering about and when I enquired,they said they are not the ones making the decision to select me. |
| Re: I Was Chosen As King: Should I Damn The Consequence Or Forget About It Entirely? by SweetCunt97(f): 10:11am On Jun 23, 2020 |
When it comes to oracle and deity matter, I no dey chook mouth. Those things can make life difficult for you if you refuse them. 10 Likes 1 Share |
| Re: I Was Chosen As King: Should I Damn The Consequence Or Forget About It Entirely? by SweetCunt97(f): 10:12am On Jun 23, 2020 |
JONNYSPUTE:Eze John 1 of Nairaland. You go faaji for men when dem crown you ryt? Do small giveaway  9 Likes 1 Share |
| Re: I Was Chosen As King: Should I Damn The Consequence Or Forget About It Entirely? by JONNYSPUTE(m): 10:19am On Jun 23, 2020 |
SweetCunt97:....Hmm. Are you indirectly telling me to take another wife and be crowned? 3 Likes |
| Re: I Was Chosen As King: Should I Damn The Consequence Or Forget About It Entirely? by SweetCunt97(f): 10:24am On Jun 23, 2020 |
JONNYSPUTE:Well, don't u wanna be king? You can damn it all if not interested |
| Re: I Was Chosen As King: Should I Damn The Consequence Or Forget About It Entirely? by JONNYSPUTE(m): 12:57pm On Jun 23, 2020 |
ecolime:....This is exactly why I found it difficult posting it here. Sounds like a Nollywood script right? This is a true life story bro.Some people know me here and I wouldn't post this stuff here if is not real. 10 Likes 1 Share |
| Re: I Was Chosen As King: Should I Damn The Consequence Or Forget About It Entirely? by Nobody: 1:21pm On Jun 23, 2020 |
The most important thing is what you want and what you are willing to sacrifice. However one thing is certain your life, your immediate family and extended family will never remain the same again. You are in-between Peace and War. Choose wisely. 7 Likes 1 Share |
| Re: I Was Chosen As King: Should I Damn The Consequence Or Forget About It Entirely? by bukatyne(f): 1:21pm On Jun 23, 2020 |
JONNYSPUTE: In summary, your aversion to the throne is 1. Polygamy (which is solved if you have the consent of your wife) 2. Your dad (Because of the culture) Your wife doesn't want to be a queen or she doesn't want to be in a polygamous marriage or she does not want both? There seems to a lot of drama (referring to number 2). If your dad as the President General of the community said no lele, leave their Kingship for them. If you are forging ahead, your wife can claim your state /town by marriage. 3 Likes |
| Re: I Was Chosen As King: Should I Damn The Consequence Or Forget About It Entirely? by JONNYSPUTE(m): 1:28pm On Jun 23, 2020 |
bukatyne:....Seems you are yet to understand how this village politics is played? I don't want polygamy and even if I agree on the first condition,which is picking a wife from my community,I can't still be crowned while my father is alive.So they will still have to wait for a long time before they get a king because my father is not gonna die now. 10 Likes 2 Shares |
| Re: I Was Chosen As King: Should I Damn The Consequence Or Forget About It Entirely? by JONNYSPUTE(m): 1:31pm On Jun 23, 2020 |
Palema007:...Don't even know how to go about this. So many sleepless nights and worries.Im becoming a shadow of myself. Can't even think straight at all. 1 Like 1 Share |
| Re: I Was Chosen As King: Should I Damn The Consequence Or Forget About It Entirely? by Nobody: 1:36pm On Jun 23, 2020 |
JONNYSPUTE:You can't be crowned until your dad is dead, you don't want a polygamus home. Why worry yourself? Sir, live in peace and let them not cause a problem in your family. When the time comes, I wouldn't be surprised if their 63 Likes 2 Shares |
| Re: I Was Chosen As King: Should I Damn The Consequence Or Forget About It Entirely? by JONNYSPUTE(m): 1:45pm On Jun 23, 2020 |
Palema007:....Thanks for this.You re right 15 Likes |
| Re: I Was Chosen As King: Should I Damn The Consequence Or Forget About It Entirely? by lopjohnny(m): 1:58pm On Jun 23, 2020 |
Were you told any negative implications that might befall you if at all you refuse the kingship? It is better to maintain your current status than to ruin and destroy your family you've been building hitherto. One thing is, even if you are happy with the whole thing, your wife will NEVER be happy with it. You've got no excuse to embrace polygamy. By the way, I just hope you are aware of what kingship entails.. are you aware of the spiritual implications that go hand in hand with it? 9 Likes |
| Re: I Was Chosen As King: Should I Damn The Consequence Or Forget About It Entirely? by ecolime(m): 2:04pm On Jun 23, 2020 |
JONNYSPUTE:Let me be mute because I am pro-nuclear family and would definitely be biased in my advise. Lalasticlala help push this to frontpage to get broader views on this. 1 Like 1 Share |
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