If you’ve been the victim of an affair, you know that it hits like a punch to the gut. The many emotions that follow feel like a hailstorm of pain. There are some predictable emotions, such as; anger, panic, betrayal or a sense of loss.

Yet, in the array of feelings that hit so hard, there may be some emotions that you never expected to feel.

When I sit with couples to discuss the aftermath of an affair, here are five emotions that take everyone by surprise; Shame, Emptiness, Possessiveness, Annoyance and Relief.

You can as well, share your experiences and opinions.