". . .so even if by mistake I wife her in future and the Lord decide to take me when we have a grown up child like me, who is planning on becoming a graduate this year and have even spent 30 years in marriage already....she won't even mourn me for long before accepting another man's proposal or bleeping with another man or probably her one time ex."


You cannot wife who you love by mistake!

Better marry her if you love her and she loves you.


It is her opinion and suggestion she gave you. As a man you decide to indulge your mum in the conversation or not. She's even a lady that is considers others emotional state.


If you marry her and eventually the Lord decide to call you home in a ripe or unripe age, and you have children, she's 100% free to marry another man. That choice is left to her. It isn't out of place. It is allowed. So long she showed you respect traditionally.


1 Corinthians 7:39 says: "A wife is bound by law as long as her husband lives; but if her husband dies, she is at liberty to be married to whom she wishes, only in the Lord."


And what guarantee do you have if you get married to another lady (aside from this said girl) that she won't marry another if you depart before her?


My guy no kill yourself with unnecessary thinking and stress. Just write down your will and let your beneficiaries feel your absence.

chinchonglee:
U re definitely a child.

Ur GF was only suggesting something, since ur mom told you her opinion let the matter die already... Stop assuming nonsense

the matter tire me

I'm just going to be blunt about this. Your mom is 52 years old, she lost your dad 5 years ago and she wants to live the rest of her life alone and you are happy? What kind of a son are you? Do you know that she could live another 50 years? Do you not feel sorry that she will be alone? Or you plan to for her to live with you and your wife forever? Is it forbidden for a 52 year old to have sex? Do you know that it is not all about sex even? It is about companionship and growing old together. My father has died for 11 years now and we have asked my mother to remarry and she refused Mind you, she's 56, but she looks hot. She is a lecturer and so many eligible men have come to ask for her hand in marriage but she's rejected them all. Unlike you that is happy at your mother's loneliness, we feel sorry for her. I wonder why you want her to mourn your dad forever. Even the Bible says that couples are not bound after death. Maybe you are very selfish or you are misogynist. Who knows if it were your father that is the widower you would have encouraged him to marry another wife to take care of him. Mtcheww

chinchonglee:
U re definitely a child.

Ur GF was only suggesting something, since ur mom told you her opinion let the matter die already... Stop assuming nonsense

No mind my guy jare!

I tried not to talk but a lot has been said about the matter.

I think OP is just jealous on behalf of his father that he can't stand the thought of another man touching his mother.

My father died in 2014 and my mom wasn't 50. I can't count how many times my siblings and I have spoken to her about giving whoever is coming into her life a chance. We have all left home and the last born despite being done in school can't because we are afraid something bad might happen to her. Recently,she fell sick in the middle of the night and thank God the last born was r home to take her to the hospital. But she still stood her ground that she wouldn't remarry.

When my mother-in-law died, I told my husband to discuss with his father about getting another wife,bit because I don't love my mother inlaw but I knew what my mum is going through and it isn't easy losing a spouse. My father in-law said he won't remarry because he loves his wife so much,but he had to after a year when he feel in the house and for 24hours he couldn't get help.

Your girlfriend was just concerned about your mother and doesn't want her to be a burden to you ,by either coming to live with you or you having to live with her because of loneliness in the future.

OdefaGirl:



Na waa ooo, you shock me.

Try and get shock absorber

IamPlato:
you Are Not Normal

LOL, no be small thing o. I guess if she had remarried she would have been cursed by God. But as she no gree remarry God will bless her. Women Don suffer for some men hand

chinchonglee:
U re definitely a child.

Ur GF was only suggesting something, since ur mom told you her opinion let the matter die already... Stop assuming nonsense

He is obviously still growing up


There is nothing wrong with remarriage


I dont know why a suggestion like that should cause scuffles

Foodqueen:
The truth is sometimes when some girls don't av any reasonable thing to say, they spew rubbish. It's in their DNA.

They don't know that somethings hurt more than sword.

To her, she thinks she was been helpful.

The girl is harmless what she suggested is not bad. well, life shall everyone has a way of reasoning issues but in this case there is none. if e too pain the o.p he should let it off his mind by telling the girlfriend that he takes an exception to the word life goes on and not is childish tinkn bla bla bla.

Mvici:
Loneliness kills. Marriage is till death do any of the parties part.

That was the only part I catch on but I knew someone like u will comment, ur last sentence no sweet me sha

you Are Not A Wise Person At All.


So You Broke Up With Her Because Of That Wise suggestion.

You Don De Even Reason Your Own Future Death.

You Are The Most Insecured Motherfvcker on This Planet

Mvici:
I Lost Confidence In My Girlfriend The Moment She Asked Me To Marry For My Mother.

I had a girlfriend some few months back before the covid 19 outbreak, that was after we went home from school due to the strike and the pandemic, we both are in the same school which is IBB university lapai, in our final.

So at home this faithful day, I put a call through! We both were talking, laughing on phone, so she ask about my mum, I said she was fine and she now ask abt her loneliness because no one at home, I told her but I'm still here with her, she ask what if school resume and what if we should go for our service next year, she now told me to marry another man for my mum.... lol... telling me who knows" that my mum might like the idea if I should table it with her. Gosh! I actually laughed about it then on phone with her but inside me, it wasn't funny at all.

The next day, what she told me was still bordering me, so many things were just running on my mind...so even if by mistake I wife her in future and the Lord decide to take me when we have a grown up child like me, who is planning on becoming a graduate this year and have even spent 30 years in marriage already....she won't even mourn me for long before accepting another man's proposal or bleeping with another man or probably her one time ex.

I decided to ask my mum with play, mum be sincere to me, you and my dad have been married since far back 1986... U both were in marriage for about 30 yrs before he past away few years ago, may his soul rest in peace..this is 5yrs now are you considering on marrying any one or having any kind of body movement or even can stand the presence of another man in your life?

Guess what her reply was....
Mum said my dad was the only man she know in her life and that's how it going to remain by God grace, period! and I shouldn't ask her such again with cry/smiles on her face because she has me and I will give her groundchil........

Seriously I don't know why I brought this here but pls tell me, any girl that can ask a 52 Year old woman to re_marry even after she has a child, isn't it clear that she can't stay without having sex to anyone as long as her husband is on a peace keeping mission or even travel abroad?

Thanks everyone.

Focus on your studies uncle!
Your grammar is too awful; And at this stage (Final year), it’s a huge concern to the nation.
By the way, I agree with your girlfriend, your mum have all the right to remarry.
She can’t mourn your dad forever.

@Op marriage is "till death do you guys part".. once one spouse dies, the other is very free to remarry and move on with life after a mourning period.

Back to topic, I feel your girlfriend was insensitive to raise such an issue in the first place. The onus lies on your mum to decide if she wants to remarry or not and not an outsider making a "joke" out of her situation.
Too many dumb and insensitive people abound in the world today, so no surprises here.

Mvici can you remain a widower when your wife is gone? It is very easy for you to feel irritated but not so with others.

Onyxunlimited:
I'm just going to be blunt about this. Your mom is 52 years old, she lost your dad 5 years ago and she wants to live the rest of her life alone and you are happy? What kind of a son are you? Do you know that she could live another 50 years? Do you not feel sorry that she will be alone? Or you plan to for her to live with you and your wife forever? Is it forbidden for a 52 year old to have sex? Do you know that it is not all about sex even? It is about companionship and growing old together. My father has died for 11 years now and we have asked my mother to remarry and she refused Mind you, she's 56, but she looks hot. She is a lecturer and so many eligible men have come to ask for her hand in marriage but she's rejected them all. Unlike you that is happy at your mother's loneliness, we feel sorry for her. I wonder why you want her to mourn your dad forever. Even the Bible says that couples are not bound after death. Maybe you are very selfish or you are misogynist. Who knows if it were your father that is the widower you would have encouraged him to marry another wife to take care of him. Mtcheww

Well said

emmnprince:
". . .so even if by mistake I wife her in future and the Lord decide to take me when we have a grown up child like me, who is planning on becoming a graduate this year and have even spent 30 years in marriage already....she won't even mourn me for long before accepting another man's proposal or bleeping with another man or probably her one time ex."


You cannot wife who you love by mistake!

Better marry her if you love her and she loves you.


It is her opinion and suggestion she gave you. As a man you decide to indulge your mum in the conversation or not. She's even a lady that is considers others emotional state.


If you marry her and eventually the Lord decide to call you home in a ripe or unripe age, and you have children, she's 100% free to marry another man. That choice is left to her. It isn't out of place. It is allowed. So long she showed you respect traditionally.


1 Corinthians 7:39 says: "A wife is bound by law as long as her husband lives; but if her husband dies, she is at liberty to be married to whom she wishes, only in the Lord."


And what guarantee do you have if you get married to another lady (aside from this said girl) that she won't marry another if you depart before her?


My guy no kill yourself with unnecessary thinking and stress. Just write down your will and let your beneficiaries feel your absence.

He is very unreasonable. Will the mourning take him to heaven? Will the mourning make him come back to life? He sounds like a hypocrite. His type will run to remarry less than a year after his wife dies

Onyxunlimited:
I'm just going to be blunt about this. Your mom is 52 years old, she lost your dad 5 years ago and she wants to live the rest of her life alone and you are happy? What kind of a son are you? Do you know that she could live another 50 years? Do you not feel sorry that she will be alone? Or you plan to for her to live with you and your wife forever? Is it forbidden for a 52 year old to have sex? Do you know that it is not all about sex even? It is about companionship and growing old together. My father has died for 11 years now and we have asked my mother to remarry and she refused Mind you, she's 56, but she looks hot. She is a lecturer and so many eligible men have come to ask for her hand in marriage but she's rejected them all. Unlike you that is happy at your mother's loneliness, we feel sorry for her. I wonder why you want her to mourn your dad forever. Even the Bible says that couples are not bound after death. Maybe you are very selfish or you are misogynist. Who knows if it were your father that is the widower you would have encouraged him to marry another wife to take care of him. Mtcheww

shutup, are you not tired of fvcking already



Any woman that's still going crazy for sex at 50something is a nympho.

At that age, you should be rechanneling your energy to other things of life and preparing yourself to meet your maker anytime the call comes in.



Don't let western life to fool you, at 60yrs and above, sexual urge begins to die

U re so childish....Just look at wat u posted...d lady is obviously more intelligent Dan u

Mvici:
I am a man and it is written that men are polygamous in nature and can marry as many as they like even in the old testament we see great men that marry more than one....but I tell u with the way I love that girl before, eventually had it been we later marry...and we had a son, we even spent 30yrs which I know by then i would be probably 60somthing.... seriously I won't really think much of another woman

Guy don't stress yourself, I understand where you're coming from.

You're still a boy, maybe not in age but in thinking.

There's nothing wrong in what your girlfriend said so there shouldn't be any cause for alarm.

Don't worry with time and as you grow older you're gonna learn.

And for those biblical quotes you made above, that's BOLONEY. There's no way you can interprete the bible by applying your common sense. The Bible is the word of God and as such, you need the guidance of the holy spirit to truly understand what is written.

The Lord will deliver you

Good to hear that, but your English is awful!

Kriss216:
All these happened cos you always over-talk with your girl on phone.. When you have nothing to say, just drop the call.. Stop engaging with unnecessary talks on phone with all these Nigerian girls... Nothing dey their head aside fucck!

That statement in bold form spoiled all the sense you made up to that point!


Not all Nigerian girls have nothing on their head aside sex. Maybe the ones wey you meet and who knows maybe this old adage:[i] "Like attract like" [/i]was at work in your life in your association and relationship with them!

As a Muslim when ur spouse dies u have 4 months and 10 days to mourn him or her after which u can remarry... this is will go a long way to curb immorality and protect the dignity and religion of the muslim woman i knw of a guy who was digging his mum after the demise of the father ur girlfriend's suggestion is cool if u ask me mind u marriage is not abt sex alone what happened to companionship meanwhile since u said u stylishly asked her abt getting another man in her life did u also ask her if in the last 5 years she has not had anyone or anything going in and out of her kini since u think marriage is about sex alone lol

What if you asked your father the question assuming he was the one alive and he said he will remarry will that make u marry ur girlfriend

evil girls

You girlfriend loves your family, especially your mum. A 52 years old woman and you want her to give up like that. Do you think a 52 year old woman does not have sex feeling again? Those are the age normal women reach their prime. You are a selfish boy. Imagine God designed your mum to live till 85 or 90. It means she still has 33/38 yrs of lonely life and she will be finding solace in her children that may turn against her tomorrow. All of you are leaving home soon, that's when she will really feel it. 5 yrs are enough to mourn. If she finds a responsible man in Church/Mosque, maybe a widower, she can continue the next phase of her life with him.
Cos I want my mom to always be happy. I will even be the one hooking her up if I find a very responsible man in Church for her. I will do a thorough investigation and background check. I will consider a widower first but options are open. Did you see Simi's (the singer) mum wedding?

Your girlfriend showed one thing here, "SHE THINKS ABOUT YOUR MOM AND HAS HER INTREST AT HEART".

Thats a trait many girls don't have, especially in these day of toxic feminism, where girls don't like their partners mum or wish not to have a mother inlaw.

But if you feels she's was wrong for trying to think of how your mum will fare when you're not with her, then you can leave her and go and find another person, that will probably become a barrier between you and your mum. My 1kobo contribution. BUH WHAT DO I EVEN KNOW SELF.

Thank you I like this

chinchonglee:
U re definitely a child.

Ur GF was only suggesting something, since ur mom told you her opinion let the matter die already... Stop assuming nonsense

It pays to be wise. There is nothing wrong with the advice given by your gf @OP. While your mum's decision is highly commendable there is nothing wrong with re-marrying after the death of one's spouse.

There is ntin wrong in what your Girlfriend said, infact your Mom can't open to u that she sometimes feel lonely which I'm very sure of... Body nor be fire wood na, even if it's not sex most times she will need someone to talk to every day, when school resumes u will leave your mom and go back who will be there by her side

u are a man no allow stop thinking like a boy

Mvici:
them no go understand Sha, na me been wear the shoe that day hear wetin she talk, maybe na out of ignorance she take talk amm but seriously from my side which I won't mention..... family members will think u were never loyal throughout those long period....haba! over 30 with a son
No be say hungry dey worry u or ur husband family ain't accommodating.... She might not even be the type cause no one knows tomorrow....it all depends on an individual mindset though.
I broke up with her not even because of that.....that one is a personal matter but the issue of my mum getting another man was really confusing so I wanted to hear more, explore and learn more about marriage which is all about sacrifice.

Op, like I said before, with time, age and experience you'll understand better.

No amount of comments or advice will sink into your head correctly, do you know why? You're still young at heart and mind.

Don't fret! Wisdom comes with experience not just age.

Let me reiterate, there's nothing wrong with what your girlfriend said.

Mvici:
[s]I Lost Confidence In My Girlfriend The Moment She Asked Me To Marry For My Mother.I had a girlfriend some few months back before the covid 19 outbreak, that was after we went home from school due to the strike and the pandemic, we both are in the same school which is IBB university lapai, in our final.So at home this faithful day, I put a call through! We both were talking, laughing on phone, so she ask about my mum, I said she was fine and she now ask abt her loneliness because no one at home, I told her but I'm still here with her, she ask what if school resume and what if we should go for our service next year, she now told me to marry another man for my mum.... lol... telling me who knows" that my mum might like the idea if I should table it with her. Gosh! I actually laughed about it then on phone with her but inside me, it wasn't funny at all.The next day, what she told me was still bordering me, so many things were just running on my mind...so even if by mistake I wife her in future and the Lord decide to take me when we have a grown up child like me, who is planning on becoming a graduate this year and have even spent 30 years in marriage already....she won't even mourn me for long before accepting another man's proposal or bleeping with another man or probably her one time ex.I decided to ask my mum with play, mum be sincere to me, you and my dad have been married since far back 1986... U both were in marriage for about 30 yrs before he past away few years ago, may his soul rest in peace..this is 5yrs now are you considering on marrying any one or having any kind of body movement or even can stand the presence of another man in your life? Guess what her reply was....Mum said my dad was the only man she know in her life and that's how it going to remain by God grace, period! and I shouldn't ask her such again with cry/smiles on her face because she has me and I will give her groundchil....Seriously I don't know why I brought this here but pls tell me, any girl that can ask a 52 Year old woman to re_marry even after she has a child, isn't it clear that she can't stay without having sex to anyone as long as her husband is on a peace keeping mission or even travel abroad?Thanks everyone[/s].

Listen to me, son.

The only reason why you brought it here is to show the whole world how stupid you really are.

You've not even married her and you are already thinking of what she will do when you die.

Why don't you drag her with you to your grave so that you will be rest assured she wont be _fucking any other nigga when you are gone?

You kids of nowadays will never stop amazing me the stupid way you guys reason at times.

Na wa o!