Raikishi:
1) Select an amount you want to save every month without thinking of anybody but yourself

2) Take out expenses for the month (transport, feeding, bills etc., school fees for children if any)

3) Take out 10% of what is left for unforeseen requests from close family (Mother, Father, Sister, Brother no friends whatsoever in this category)

4) Do you have anything left?

Yes: Based on priorities (your priorities) distribute this to help someone that you know needs it and that GOD will bless you for


No: I for talk but...

Follow this strategy
Stop being stupid mahn..
These people are just using you
If nah them dey abroad they probably wonmt remember you ever.

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ikoroduarea:


I have been doing this for them for over 10 years. I ma not a stingy person. I have a very active charity foundation for the support of less privileged, which they've benefited from too many times. My wife had earlier recovered from sick shortly before the second time ease of covid19. My major problme is the pressure and contstant demands. Its not even up to 48 hoursi sent the senior one money before the younger one demanded for money for his shop again. Thank you for your concern. Like i said earlier, insults are welcome. Thank you everyone.

Don’t even listen to that guy.

teekay021:
I will try to be straight with you because I am also a victim of extortion, I leave in canada and I have large friend base as a matter of fact I champion most of the gathering we organized before I left Nigeria. My case is strangely someone who deliberately put himself in an uncomfortable position and protray myself as a friend in need and family to them all, even my first savings was shared among many . I think what we get wrong is gifting someone money without asking. I swear to God I have sent out money to someone while I never get a thank you message back I felt compel to do it over and over again . I'm still doing a bit but I have converted 80% of my resources to be solely for me and my family alone . You should know and learn how to say No. you will be amazed as they approach you with sense of entitlement and command . A friend of mine just got a venza ( on finance ) he upload the pucture with a native attire ( agbada) to his whatsapp . Immediately his i box was floode with requst message . You should do your best but remember you come first and you can't satisfy everyone.

Hahahaha

You are sending money to people who cannot say thank you
Don’t you work hard for your money?
There are good people in this life o..

When people like this come, start narrating your financial problems to them

My Warri people said "Lean on me, no be press me die". When a handshake reaches the elbow then it becomes something else.

OP you owe them nothing if they've refused to get brain all this while you've been assisting them.

[quote author=OCway92806 post=92181074]

Why are you this bitter. Really! I had to check again if you are the OP. I'm not a typical Nigerian that stoops low to answer insults cos I have high self esteem. Do well to share your opinion without being overly bitter. Nairaland is a small world you know and as I said in my first post, I stand to be corrected constuctively. I have been in the OP's position before and I know how he feels. So I can relate with it. Unfortunately, you seem to think mainland is your small London. Oops!

Mindlog:


You lose the assertiveness when you begin to explain why you are saying NO, giving the other person the opportunity to whittle your resolve.

Personally, I have internalized it and learnt how not to feel guilty when I say NO to whatever/ whoever I can't say YES to.

This one deep

Hmmm!
This reminds me of a close relative whom I helped in a similar way. Omo!! the babe wan come open office for my head I even advise am based on what to do wey go fit dey yield money for am she nor gree do. She start to vex for me unto say money nor dey come out from me to her again like say she work money put for my pocket. People can be so ungrateful and inconsiderate. She nor even know how I take gather the one wey I give her make she take start business o!
She missed my calls two times on two occasions and never bothered to flash or call me back.
Wos!! I lock up since that time.
Mi ò r'áyè òshì

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Lambarry1:
No mind am jare na the I have arrived mentally dey worry am. How much you get wey everyone dey disturb you 4 money. Fake op

Why the thing dey pain you? Dem deport you or u be aduro?

OCway92806:



I’m on you “Mainland Dreams Nigerians “ today idiot, somebody remembered the struggle from the past life God has already provided him an opportunity to see how things are done normally, something you won’t know cos where you stay is “racket” Nigeria

And because of those memories go and google the term “memories” you troll, he decided to show love back to his friends who are obviously delinquents, hater oshi, and don’t even try to deny it ! because you are one ! And from your “baddest guy” comment you a straight bitch

You need some English lessons. Couldn't read what you posted

dangoteinlaw:
Op op op how many times i call u, i have alot of siblings and friends abroad not that i ask them for anything coz I myself I'm okay here coz most of us finished together but coz of the connection and things we passed through together they almost see me like their father here infact whenever anyone wanted to do something there ir in Nigeria i am the first person they call. Yhe only luck i have is that i am doin 200% okay coz if I wasn't i am very certain they willl do more than send me a meager 300k so let me ask if there's some way they really helped u like sacrificed alot for you? I and Stanley way back eh we both lived together in a room. He was rusticated gor a year, wanted to go back home i told him his life will be ruined coz his parents won't give him another chance i asked him to stay back and i will take care of him which i did. He got wayward at some point joined cult but i never left him, i was stabbed coz of him but i knew his future was outside this world, i always saw wings on him whenever i see him which he himself never knew and today he's more than okay. Tell me if I needed money how much will such person send? 100k? Lmao. So that's why i asked was there anything big tin they did that u are not saying, if there is i beg of u don't leave them. Try and see how u can help the situation, giving someone 50k is not help, its beer money, set the person up so he can fish for himself. Even when things don't work out with the business try and see ow u can solve it help out again, they may br your helpers tomorrow. I have seen billionaires die and all their so called wealth distributed by the same ppl they think were desturbing them, no let them use juju on you yet. Help them out if you are capable. As for me its even my joy helping out old friends, it gives me that sense of a big circle. They are not doing well but at least they are alive and in my circle, the little message i send them i have them to send those messages and they already me. Their prayers are following me thats why god keep blessing me. The bible says that some ppl give more and still have more in stock but some keep all they have and yet are still poor.

You are very proud. They sent you money and you said it's beer money, why didn't you reject it+ Proud mf

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Are you sure you don't owe them in any way? Cos I can't understand why they bill you and you pay unless of course you are indebted to them in some way.

jesmond3945:
have you sent money to your mother or siblings? Do you currently have any investment? Do you have landed properties?

Good questions;
With the exemption of sending money to mother, I have who only enjoy sending money to friends through me but never sends to me.I do account for him every 10kb if doing a project for him,sometimes mine will go for it.I didn't complain when I had nothing, so I will not complain now.I am a proud person actually,so I do it without telling an outsider.He finds it difficult to give any of his siblings but when outsiders disappoints him,he will tell u how much he sends to them and expects u to be at war with them because of him...But unfortunately for him,his siblings are focused in life.

jesmond3945:
have you sent money to your mother or siblings? Do you currently have any investment? Do you have landed properties?

Good questions;
With the exemption of sending money to mother, I have one who only enjoy sending money to friends through me but never sends to me or any of my siblings.I do account for him every 10kb if doing a project for him,sometimes mine will go for it.I didn't complain when I had nothing, so I will not complain now.I am a proud person actually,so I do it without telling an outsider.He finds it difficult to give any of his siblings but when outsiders disappoints him,he will tell u how much he sends to them and expects u to be at war with them because of him...But unfortunately for him,his siblings are focused in life.

ikoroduarea:
Hi all,

I will really appreciate if moderator can help push this to front page.

Firstly, insults are welcome. I reside in Europe. Two of my friends they are biological brothers, they've been sucking me. I have been sending them money regularly for years, yes years, but I now realised that these people are not ready to work or learn any skill. Even their own biological brother in abroad reported them to me and doesn't take them serious anymore except their mum. Infarct, i used to send money to their mum too. But they just keep asking me for money everytime. Imagine I just sent you money when you said you are sick, two days after you sent me voice record asking me for money to rent a shop. Then the younger one who's chat bellow asking me for 100k for three of them as if I am picking money on the floor here. To some people in Nigeria who always think all nigerians in diaspora think we always think you're begging for money whenever you say hi just to hear from us, it is not the case. How about this too?

I am really tired. My wife who always agree I should help them have started complaining too. These two friends suddenly changed because I used to send them money even before they ask. It's like every week one problem must happen to them that require money. They will just send account number and the deadline time. They keep coming, coming, coming back again after giving. I have paid hundreds of thousands of naira for visa processing for one of them maybe at least they will stop asking me for money and one will be able to help his brother, but the visa was unsuccessful.

Few days ago one of them ask me to give him my sister's number that he just want to greet her since it's been years he saw her last. Behold, the next day my sister called to ask when did I hear from my friend last and did he mention about financial problem to me, I told my sister that he called me two days ago and asked of her number which I gave him. My sister said he requested for money to support his house rent and she sent him some money. I was shocked. Can you imagine guys? My friend. I am not saying it's a crime for him to ask my sister money but why lie to me that you just want to greet her when you asked me for her number? Whereas I just sent him money too not even up to a week.

See another demand again, see my reply, see his reply.

I know one or the two of them will start gossiping me around that I am proud, but they won't tell them about the good I have done for them, I have been doing. They won't. Some friends are not worth it anymore. I am very upset now that it's affecting me mentally and with my wife. Even my children were asking me last night "dad are you alright, you're not happy".

You know what again, one of them sent messages to my wife asking for mobile phone. I saw it but my wife didn't know that I saw it not until I responded to him myself and told my wife to never bother. My wife later sent the phone to him. Since then he's been using that opportunity to demand from her. Though he eventually stopped it but continue asking me only.

I have sent so much money but they just never stop asking. And I am not the time that take pictures and flaunt them on social media. I live my life on low-key.

I need your honest opinion.

Insults are welcome I promise I won't react to any insult.

I wanted to block them on my social media especially on WhatsApp but I had a rethink so they won't feel like I am proud because I am in abroad.

Brother it seems you have too much of money to dole out. you gave those leeches the leeway opportunity to see u as maga way day pay. You owe them no allegiance or reason. simply block them on social media.

If you want to help any one, let them give u good reasons n not frivolities. if u fail, these gays will be the first to mock u.

I am peeved at u while typing this. you don't know Friends. they go day even insult your wife especially when they nor see shishi from u. bros steer clear of them. I tuetuelize u from Edo state

ikoroduarea:
Hi all,

I will really appreciate if moderator can help push this to front page.

Firstly, insults are welcome. I reside in Europe. Two of my friends they are biological brothers, they've been sucking me. I have been sending them money regularly for years, yes years, but I now realised that these people are not ready to work or learn any skill. Even their own biological brother in abroad reported them to me and doesn't take them serious anymore except their mum. Infarct, i used to send money to their mum too. But they just keep asking me for money everytime. Imagine I just sent you money when you said you are sick, two days after you sent me voice record asking me for money to rent a shop. Then the younger one who's chat bellow asking me for 100k for three of them as if I am picking money on the floor here. To some people in Nigeria who always think all nigerians in diaspora think we always think you're begging for money whenever you say hi just to hear from us, it is not the case. How about this too?

I am really tired. My wife who always agree I should help them have started complaining too. These two friends suddenly changed because I used to send them money even before they ask. It's like every week one problem must happen to them that require money. They will just send account number and the deadline time. They keep coming, coming, coming back again after giving. I have paid hundreds of thousands of naira for visa processing for one of them maybe at least they will stop asking me for money and one will be able to help his brother, but the visa was unsuccessful.

Few days ago one of them ask me to give him my sister's number that he just want to greet her since it's been years he saw her last. Behold, the next day my sister called to ask when did I hear from my friend last and did he mention about financial problem to me, I told my sister that he called me two days ago and asked of her number which I gave him. My sister said he requested for money to support his house rent and she sent him some money. I was shocked. Can you imagine guys? My friend. I am not saying it's a crime for him to ask my sister money but why lie to me that you just want to greet her when you asked me for her number? Whereas I just sent him money too not even up to a week.

See another demand again, see my reply, see his reply.

I know one or the two of them will start gossiping me around that I am proud, but they won't tell them about the good I have done for them, I have been doing. They won't. Some friends are not worth it anymore. I am very upset now that it's affecting me mentally and with my wife. Even my children were asking me last night "dad are you alright, you're not happy".

You know what again, one of them sent messages to my wife asking for mobile phone. I saw it but my wife didn't know that I saw it not until I responded to him myself and told my wife to never bother. My wife later sent the phone to him. Since then he's been using that opportunity to demand from her. Though he eventually stopped it but continue asking me only.

I have sent so much money but they just never stop asking. And I am not the time that take pictures and flaunt them on social media. I live my life on low-key.

I need your honest opinion.

Insults are welcome I promise I won't react to any insult.

I wanted to block them on my social media especially on WhatsApp but I had a rethink so they won't feel like I am proud because I am in abroad.

Don't you want to have savings? Don't you want to be able to cater well for your wife and children?

What about your own family (siblings and parents)? Do they bother you this much?

Those people have seen you as a maga. Please cut them off because they will never stop. They will always have one problem running into another problem and they have built their tent on your head.

They are able men. Let then go and hustle for themselves. I don't think you are helping them by always giving them. Don't be shocked if they have built their houses with the money you are sending them while you haven't.

omooba969:


You talk too much.

How do you mean
C'mon my dear, don't be insensitive!
Do you know how draining this can be
Is money even easy to come by

ibkkk:

[/b]

How do you mean
C'mon my dear, don't be insensitive!
Do you know how draining this can be
Is money even easy to come by

Op comes across as someone who can't say NO when it's not convenient, he needs to know that he owes no one...

HE TALKS TOO MUCH.

omooba969:


Op comes across as someone who can't say NO when it's not convenient, he needs to know that he owes no one...

HE TALKS TOO MUCH.

Oh, now I understand you.
Come for a hug!

Op , your ego might be your ruin. You want to be perceived as great. But don't have enough money and brain to back it up. That is why you can't say no.

Jaqenhghar:

I learnt form naija prople long time ago. My mother was seriously sick they were still calling her on phone to beg. I was the one holding the phone then. I asked them if they are aware the situation she is in. They answered that yes but that my mum promised blah blah blah.

Can you imagine? SMH

ikoroduarea:
Hi all,

I will really appreciate if moderator can help push this to front page.

Firstly, insults are welcome. I reside in Europe. Two of my friends they are biological brothers, they've been sucking me. I have been sending them money regularly for years, yes years, but I now realised that these people are not ready to work or learn any skill. Even their own biological brother in abroad reported them to me and doesn't take them serious anymore except their mum. Infarct, i used to send money to their mum too. But they just keep asking me for money everytime. Imagine I just sent you money when you said you are sick, two days after you sent me voice record asking me for money to rent a shop. Then the younger one who's chat bellow asking me for 100k for three of them as if I am picking money on the floor here. To some people in Nigeria who always think all nigerians in diaspora think we always think you're begging for money whenever you say hi just to hear from us, it is not the case. How about this too?

I am really tired. My wife who always agree I should help them have started complaining too. These two friends suddenly changed because I used to send them money even before they ask. It's like every week one problem must happen to them that require money. They will just send account number and the deadline time. They keep coming, coming, coming back again after giving. I have paid hundreds of thousands of naira for visa processing for one of them maybe at least they will stop asking me for money and one will be able to help his brother, but the visa was unsuccessful.

Few days ago one of them ask me to give him my sister's number that he just want to greet her since it's been years he saw her last. Behold, the next day my sister called to ask when did I hear from my friend last and did he mention about financial problem to me, I told my sister that he called me two days ago and asked of her number which I gave him. My sister said he requested for money to support his house rent and she sent him some money. I was shocked. Can you imagine guys? My friend. I am not saying it's a crime for him to ask my sister money but why lie to me that you just want to greet her when you asked me for her number? Whereas I just sent him money too not even up to a week.

See another demand again, see my reply, see his reply.

I know one or the two of them will start gossiping me around that I am proud, but they won't tell them about the good I have done for them, I have been doing. They won't. Some friends are not worth it anymore. I am very upset now that it's affecting me mentally and with my wife. Even my children were asking me last night "dad are you alright, you're not happy".

You know what again, one of them sent messages to my wife asking for mobile phone. I saw it but my wife didn't know that I saw it not until I responded to him myself and told my wife to never bother. My wife later sent the phone to him. Since then he's been using that opportunity to demand from her. Though he eventually stopped it but continue asking me only.

I have sent so much money but they just never stop asking. And I am not the time that take pictures and flaunt them on social media. I live my life on low-key.

I need your honest opinion.

Insults are welcome I promise I won't react to any insult.

I wanted to block them on my social media especially on WhatsApp but I had a rethink so they won't feel like I am proud because I am in abroad.

Sometimes you have to reason without bringing emotions.

If you drop dead today will they take care of your children and wife. Will they even visit your family?