I still cant understand this whole thing. I believe the Bible is very clear on the issue of premarital sex. I attended a wedding of a Christian Sister, to my utmost surprise, she was already pregnant. I mean her wedding gown couldnt hide the swollen stomach.
I was surprised, to say the least disappointed. It was a church wedding. The Presiding pastor cannot tell me that he wasnt aware.
I dont  know were we are heading in the Church. I think if we profess to be Christians,then we should be Christians indeed.
What do you think?

The fact she got pregnant before her wedding does not prove she's not a Christian; nor does it prove she's one.

Indeed, there are many issues that some Christians have sadly fallen into; which should not make anyone of us happier over them. However, it is one thing to have fallen so sadly into such a situation; and it's quite another thing to be proud in it.

While I hope they enjoy their married life, I do hope they would not be prideful about their mishap. God is able to forgive them when as they truly seek His grace.

It is wrong to be pregnant before wedding (Heb 13:4). ;DBut if it does happen God is merciful to forgive(Eph 2:4-5). Never give-up

Well, its unfortunate when a xtian sister gets pregnant b4 wedding but that does not mean the person is the worst sinner.

Some pple do try to keep themselves but they might fall into the temptation once and here comes the big belly. The best thing is this situation is to ask God for forgivreness and move on. The unfortunate thing is that some xtians would want to run away from the scandal, then opt for abortion.

Abortion will hide the act from men but not from God, therefore, in as much as we pray not to fall into such temptation, those who found themselves in it should not try hiding it through abortion to avoid the wrath of God. You can hide from man but nothing is hidden from God.

Remember, its not by might. No one is perfect.

We should try to avoid criticisms and pray for God's divine grace to guard our spiritual lives.

@teena
i second that, well said

Correct me if I'm wrong,
but the young lady didn't climb on top of herself and get herself pregnant did she? I read the post and is seems like everyone i talk about the lady, but I hear no talk of the man, who I am 99.9% sure that he had a little something to it.

All I am saying, is it takes two tango, ad she did not climb on top of herself (or behind herself, whichever is their preference) and get herself pregnant. Lets talk of her lack of responsibility by being on some from of birth control, and lets talk of his stupidity of not using a condom in this day in age thats just dangerous.

Birth control is to readily available and cheap and their is no reason why ANY couple should become pregnant before marriage if they are engaging in pre-marital relations.

I myself am a Christan, and believe that pre-maritial sex is wrong. I also believe that the flesh is weak and a boy and a girl together will do what they will do. Be smart about it. And don't put all the blame on the woman, thats alls i say

peace.

As a christian I would say this is wrong, but there are a lot of people claiming to be christians who actually do fornicate, you can point out this your so -called sister simply because she is pregnant.

Anyway, I know of a few people who were pregnant at their church wedding this is because they had already been to the registry a few months back before the church wedding, you never know if this is the case with this same person , so she might not have defiled her marrital bed. In any case if she has then , God is merciful and kind and he will surely forgive bought parties.

@ Poster

In every case of pre-marital sex in the Bible there is no punishment for the sexual act. The only penalty is the compensation to the father for the woman's change in status.

Exodus 22:16 - 17, "If a man seduces a virgin who is not engaged, and lies with her, he must pay a dowry for her to be his wife. If her father absolutely refuses to give her to him, he shall pay money equal to the dowry for virgins."

Deuteronomy 22:28 - 29, "If a man finds a girl who is a virgin, who is not engaged, and seizes her and lies with her and they are discovered, then the man who lay with her shall give to the girl’s father fifty shekels of silver, and she shall become his wife because he has violated her; he cannot divorce her all his days."

The key here is that it is not an offence for a man and woman having sex. The punishment is for the change in value of the woman as bride.

@ Poster

In every case of pre-marital sex in the Bible there is no punishment for the sexual act. The only penalty is the compensation to the father for the woman's change in status.

Exodus 22:16 - 17, "If a man seduces a virgin who is not engaged, and lies with her, he must pay a dowry for her to be his wife. If her father absolutely refuses to give her to him, he shall pay money equal to the dowry for virgins."

Deuteronomy 22:28 - 29, "If a man finds a girl who is a virgin, who is not engaged, and seizes her and lies with her and they are discovered, then the man who lay with her shall give to the girl’s father fifty shekels of silver, and she shall become his wife because he has violated her; he cannot divorce her all his days."

The key here is that it is not an offence for a man and woman having sex. The punishment is for the change in value of the woman as bride.

So what are you saying? That the Bible advocates pre-marital sex. Brother, go and truly read and ask God for divine understanding, that is the only way you will understand.

Oh don't come and give me that "Qu''ran" said this crap. I have read some parts of the Qu''ran and it doesn't seem like God's words. Sorry it doesn't.

@Teena

Thanks for that, you said it all.

Family and culture also has a role to play in this. I’ve seen situations where the bride is asked to get pregnant before the wedding . . .it is archaic and demeaning ^{(testing the woman's fertility before their son gets stuck)} but it is done.

Family and culture also has a role to play in this. I’ve seen situations where the bride is asked to get pregnant before the wedding . . .it is archaic and demeaning (testing the woman's fertility before their son gets stuck) but it is done.

Yeah I've heard of that too.

What if she can't get pregnant? So they will defile her and leave her? Rubbish.
What if she's not at fault? They will defile her, leave her, and move on to the next?

That archaic thinking needs to be squashed and women need to stop being so desperate and letting these men do this to them.

MC Usman:

@ Poster

In every case of pre-marital sex in the Bible there is no punishment for the sexual act. The only penalty is the compensation to the father for the woman's change in status.

Exodus 22:16 - 17, "If a man seduces a virgin who is not engaged, and lies with her, he must pay a dowry for her to be his wife. If her father absolutely refuses to give her to him, he shall pay money equal to the dowry for virgins."

Deuteronomy 22:28 - 29, "If a man finds a girl who is a virgin, who is not engaged, and seizes her and lies with her and they are discovered, then the man who lay with her shall give to the girl’s father fifty shekels of silver, and she shall become his wife because he has violated her; he cannot divorce her all his days."

The key here is that it is not an offence for a man and woman having sex. The punishment is for the change in value of the woman as bride.

There are 2 problems here:
1. MC Usman is reading the qu'ran into the bible. In is'lam, the penalty for fornication and adultery is death.
2. MC Usman either has a very poor understanding of the bible or he is just exhibiting the usual is'lamic penchant for deceit.

Just start from the 10 commandments, the sin of adultery and fornication is boldly declared. However God gives us the benefit of repentance and forgiveness . . . virtues that are sadly absent in your own cult that is unhealthily focused on death.

~Lady~:

Yeah I've heard of that too.

What if she can't get pregnant? So they will defile her and leave her? Rubbish.
What if she's not at fault? They will defile her, leave her, and move on to the next?

That archaic thinking needs to be squashed and women need to stop being so desperate and letting these men do this to them.

Precisely.

Now imagine if the problem was from the guy, they'll blame the woman (because it's a man with fertility problem is unheard of) and then move to the next and the next. . .it's sad but in the end, the women are to blame. I can't imagine someone suggesting that rubbish to me and go with it.

4 Him:

2. MC Usman either has a very poor understanding of the bible or he is just exhibiting the usual is'lamic penchant for deceit

~Lady~:

That the Bible advocates pre-marital sex. Brother, go and truly read and ask God for divine understanding, that is the only way you will understan

I did not say so i was just pasting views of Christain Writers on the subgect. See 4ur self

Writers Comments:

G. Rattray Taylor, author of Sex in History: [The adultery Commandment, essentially a property offense against another's mate, does not require] that a man should restrict his attentions to his wife; indeed, when a wife proved barren, she would often give one of her handmaidens to her husband that she might bear children for him. Nor was there any ban on premarital sex; it is seldom appreciated that nowhere in the Old Testament is there any prohibition of unpremeditated fornication--apart from rape, and subject to a father's right to claim a cash interest in a virgin. Once a girl had reached the age of 12 1/2 years, she was free to engage in sexual activity, unless her father specifically forbade it.

A document commissioned by the House of Bishops of the Episcopal Church (Continuing the Dialogue, published by Forward Movement, Cincinnati, 1995) stated on page 45 that the passages in this Biblical story (SONG OF SONGS )are "in praise of sexual love, celebrating youthful passion, with no reference to marriage, It affirms that sexual love is in itself good and beneficial."

In Sexual Paradox: Creative Tensions in Our Lives and in Our Congregations (Pilgrim Press, New York, 1991), Celia Allison Hahn noted on page 192 that "The story (SONG OF SONGS ) is clearly not about marriage or procreation , but about the delights of erotic love."


In New International Biblical Commentary: , Song of Songs (Henderson Publishers; Peabody, Massachusetts; 1999), Roland E. Murphy and Elizabeth Huwiler noted on page 243 that "According to many [interpreters], the central couple is not married. This view is supported by the fact that the lovers must part in the morning, Also, most of the couple's lovemaking apparently takes place out of doors, in the wilds, and in gardens, [Overall, the text] does not seem to insist that the appropriate expression of sexuality is necessarily limited to marriage."

There is nothing said about premarital sex in the New Testament.
The scriptures were not written in English. "Fornication" is a great example of the lies in translation of some bibles. Some English bibles say that, others say the more correct translation "sexual immorality". The koline Greek word that has been mistranslated as fornication is porneia.

There is no biblical basis whatsoever to translate porneia into fornication (singles sex).
Porneia meant sexual immorality which included:
1) Sex during women's menstruation.

2) Adultery which biblically was understood by the Hebrews to mean wrong for a married women to have sex with another man since violated her husbands property rights. It was never understood to be wrong for a married man since his wife had no such rights. The married man could have as many wives and concubines (breeders) as he wished as long as not married (another man's property. Nothing ever was wrong with singles sexuality. "Fornication" is a total mistranslation of Greek "porneia"

3) Pagan sex goddess prostitution. Porneia as used in I Cor 6-9, falsely translated in some bibles as fornication was actually the practice of the prostitutes in the Temples of Corinth selling their services as a part of pagan fertility goddess worship which was what Paul was warning against. Not even specifically about prostitution (still legal and very popular in Israel today) but used as a pagan sexual goddess worship.

4) Pederasty - one of the worst of all sexual sins that took various forms: The practice of pederasty falls into three distinct styles. First is the relationship between an older man and a young boy. Second is the practice of slave prostitutes. Third is that of the effeminate "call boy" or prostitute. Other practices included a heterosexual male degrading another heterosexual male by anal intercourse after capturing them in battle. Another practice was heterosexual's using anal intercourse to drive out other heterosexual strangers they didn't like such as the case of the Sodom story.

It had absolutely nothing to do with homosexuality as we know it today, which is simply being as God designed some people to be.Adultery in biblical times did not mean what it means to us today. Clearly there was never a word said about the fact Hebrew men could have as many wives, concubines (breeders) and "other women" as they could afford. THIS IS NOT ADULTERY, in the Hebrew understanding of the Adultery Commandment of Moses. Adultery as understood by what Moses said was only wrong for married women, never a married man.

Christ taught in the Sermon on the Mount that the only law is the law of love. He demonstrated this by reversing four of the OT laws which conflicted with loving people. Therefore anything that was hurtful, not by mutual consent etc. would be immoral for a Christian, but obviously not loving sexuality regardless of marital status or natural sexual orientation.

It is wrong for a Christian sister to have sex even before marriage not even pregnancy alone,but incase it happens the man should pay her bride price and ask God for forgiveness.

I dont think its wrong

Well no sentiments. No!

wrong wrong, its absolutely wrong

It is wrong. the Bible expressly talks about the marriage bed being undefiled.
Worse still is the heinous crime of abortion all in the name of presenting a pious front to all & sundry looking pretty in the wedding pixs.
I strongly feel we need to redefine who a true christian is nowadayz.

mistake mistake

its actuallty quite encouraging for me to see so many Christians standing against pre-marital sex. Its wrong according to the Bible, and God is merciful, so He'll forgive all sins. Lets just do what's right, and move on by god's Grace.

rooshie:

its actuallty quite encouraging for me to see so many Christians standing against pre-marital sex. Its wrong according to the Bible, and God is merciful, so He'll forgive all sins. Lets just do what's right, and move on by god's Grace.

You really think the people yarning all that nonsense are really practicing what they preach? Lmao 

That means my senior sister has really commited a terrible sin

She did her wine carrying last December and the dowry was paid on that day. By January she did her court marriage and they went striaght to the church for the Pastor's blessings. The white wedding is coming up in october and she has taken in. What do you people suggest since the court marriage was attended by parents from both sides. You know before October there will be rumour that she got pregnant before her wedding.

echoes:

That means my senior sister has really commited a terrible sin

She did her wine carrying last December and the dowry was paid on that day. By January she did her court marriage and they went striaght to the church for the Pastor's blessings. The white wedding is coming up in october and she has taken in. What do you people suggest since the court marriage was attended by parents from both sides. You know before October there will be rumour that she got pregnant before her wedding.

isnt the whole registry thing done like a couple of days before white wedding?

People complai8n cos it just doesnt amke sense tio see a preghnant person in white. It doesnt even matter if you are not a virgin anymore, that at leats cant be seen in public but a visible bump? That doesnt make any sense. Instead for them to stick to cream, they never do. they fool themselves with white

Reminds me of an episode of Sex And The City actually. Miranda finally marrying the father of her kid, went to look for wedding dersses an dthe lady came to her with a white dress and she yelled at her saying "I have a kid! The jig is up!" . Now that's a woman that knows what she's doing

Has anyone read the story of the conception of Jesus by the Virgin Mary? Maybe we need to click on "Refresh"

We are not talking of court oath taking here. They did their court wedding and have gotten the certificate from the court. And they can decide either to do the white wedding in october or leave it.

echoes:

We are not talking of court oath taking here. They did their court wedding and have gotten the certificate from the court. And they can decide either to do the white wedding in october or leave it.

what is the diffrence between court wedding and registry?

So are you saying they shouldnt be wedded cos the girl's pregnant? Maybe they should conduct a virginity test on men and women before wedding them in the church. The sin is not in taking in; it’s in the pre-marital sex. Someone who engages in pre-marital sex and someone who takes in before marriage is committing the same sin as far as Christianity is concerned.

D-reloaded:

You really think the people yarning all that nonsense are really practicing what they preach? Lmao

Who told you they are not practising it? who made you the judge anyway? But then thats beside the point, everyone has a sense of right and wrong, even when they do the wrong thing, dosent mean they dont know what is right.

I’m sha going for a cream gown; no need deceiving myself, pregnancy or no pregnancy.

Ujujoan:

who made you the judge anyway?

Law school. Would you still be whining if I wrote "most" instead?

So are you saying they shouldnt be wedded because the girl's pregnant

Who are you referring to here? I think the problem people have is with certain tarditions that believe a woman should be pregnant before getting married to "test fertility"

Nor was there any ban on premarital sex; it is seldom appreciated that nowhere in the Old Testament is there any prohibition of unpremeditated fornication

I'm glad he said Old Testament and not the New Testament. It is the Old covenant and not the New one.
Here's the thing you need to understand about the Bible. It is made up of the Old Law and the New Law. We have the Old law to show how God's people fall from glory and how merciful God can be. It gives us the commandments and shows how the people fall from it. Therefore we are to learn from their mistakes, it is our history. In order to know where you're going, you need to know where you're coming from, so you wont end up in the same spot.
The New Law doesn't just wipe out the Old Law, it enforces it and makes it easier for us to come closer to God. Loving God is not and should not be that hard. Love is not hurtful.

"in praise of sexual love, celebrating youthful passion, with no reference to marriage,  It affirms that sexual love is in itself good and beneficial

um no it doesn't. See this is why not just any random Emeka can or should be allotted power to interpret the Holy Bible. The Song of Songs uses the love between a man and a woman to show how God loves us. It is not a sexual book. This person clearly misses the part about the Bride and the Bridegroom and the virgin at the end whose brothers protect her so that she may not be spoilt for marriage.
I hope you're not just searching the internet and taking whatever you find to be truth, that would be so naive of you. You know that any random person can post anything on the internet.

The scriptures were not written in English. "Fornication" is a great example of the lies in translation of some bibles

I am French and I say Rouge, my English friend calls it Red, where is the lie?

There is no biblical basis whatsoever to translate porneia into fornication (singles sex).
Porneia meant sexual immorality which included:

Porneia means any illicit sexual intercourse, including fornication, adultery, homosexuality, sex with animals, sexual intercourse with relatives, sexual intercourse with man and woman.

What you said is correct except that because you are unlearned about the Bible you think it is a lie. All these are mentioned there, 1 Cor 6:9 Do you not know that the unjust will not inherit the kingdom of God? o not be deceived; neither fornicators nor idolaters nor adulterers nor boy prostitutes nor sodomites.
If you continue reading down you will see that it speaks of sexual immorality as a whole but actually mentions them.

Stop calling the Bible lies when you know nothing of it.

D-reloaded:

Law school. Would you still be whining if I wrote "most" instead?

Then you are totally in the wrong place. This is not a court of Law!!

D-reloaded:

Who are you referring to here? I think the problem people have is with certain tarditions that believe a woman should be pregnant before getting married to "test fertility"

I'm talking to the poster. Why should the pastor refuse to wed them because the lady's pregnant. Pregnancy's not the crime, pre-marital sex is. If anything should be done at all, then a virginity test should be conducted and churches should not be allowed to wed non-virgins.

I personally dont know of any tradition that believes a woman should get pregnant before getting married 'to test fertility'. Traditionally, a woman is not supposed to sleep with the husband before marriage. Infact, its a taboo.

Somehow I think christians encourage theselves to be hypocritic. A church with a rule of no wedding for pregnant women is only encouraging the lady to do an abortion if she finds herself pregnant before marriage. Fornication should be the target, not pregnancy; afterall, pregnancy is only an outcome of fornication.

@poster,
It is totally wrong but that does not mean that the lady should be crucified.
The pastor in question should have waited till after the child birth to avoid this kind of
misconception or whatsoever.

Let him who had never commited such offence cast the first stone. None is righteous.
Have you also searched yourself? We all know that it is wrong but majority of us keep on doing it.
May the LORD GOD have mercy on us (amen).