Gemma11:


In this case it doesn't matter if the 'thought' would really be carried out. The fact is that it is possible. The other day I heard a man say that if he found out his son was gay the first thing he would do would be to lock him up with three love-peddlers in a hopes to 'cure' him. There are also plenty accounts of gay men in Africa who say their families are pressurising them to get married. I don't understand why you are conveniently excluding the gay equation and the fact that Edirin sought the help of the gay organisation; They didn't seek him.

All Edirin had to do to apply for the order and state why he felt it necessary and whether you like it or not claiming to be gay and being scared of being sent back to Africa for marriage is realistic.

The judge is not going to hand out a forced marriage order just for the sake of it as there are other order orders that could have had the same legal hold as the forced marriage one.

You came to the conclusion that forced marriage is realistic in a region that does not have a record of practicing it based on the fact that some people mentioned someone should marry? Are you having a laff?

What I told you was a gay argument carries more weight, and most UK youths will know that.

Sorry there is no other reason why a street wise black teenager in the UK would go to gay organisation unless they were really gay.

I have heard of illegal immigrants and asylum guys going down that route out of desperation but not  a teenage kid who has indefinite leave to remain in the UK.

Sagamite:

You came to the conclusion that forced marriage is realistic in a region that does not have a record of practicing it based on the fact that some people mentioned someone should marry? Are you having a laff?

You are conveniently forgetting to factor in the gay issue.

I don't know why you are acting brand new. So you can honestly say that if an Nigerian found out that their son was gay and was sleeping around with different men, the idea to marry them off at asap wouldn't even enter the equation? Come one get real!

I'm Urhobo, and I know my people will do anything to save face of having a gay son.

Gemma11:

Sorry there is no other reason why a street wise black teenager in the UK would go to gay organisation unless they were really gay.

I have heard of illegal immigrants and asylum guys going down that route out of desperation but not  a teenage kid who has indefinite leave to remain in the UK.

You are funny.  

You challenged my argument that gay arguments carry more weight by giving example of where people exploited that argument, and then say "there is no other reason why a kid will go to a gay organisation except he is gay".  

There is a high chance he went to the gay organisation because he calculated that will be the only arguable motive to argue an area that does not practice forced marriage is going to do it to him. THAT IS ANOTHER REASON!

Gemma11:

You are conveniently forgetting to factor in the gay issue.

I don't know why you are acting brand new. So you can honestly say that if an Nigerian found out that their son was gay and was sleeping around with different men, the idea to marry them off at asap wouldn't even enter the equation? Come one get real!

I'm Urhobo, and I know my people will do anything to save face of having a gay son.

There is NOTHING LIKE FORCED MARRIAGE in Southern Nigeria even as a gay person. You could not even prove it to exist in your own tribe.

Thinking a child should get married is NOT, I repeat NOT, the same as forced marriage.

Gemma11:

So you don't think it is a bit wierd that this guy bypassed orgs like Childline or the NSPCC which could have easily assisted him in filing for a another type of civic order to protect his rights and specifically chose an organisation that specialises in supporting the rights of gay teens instead? How do you explain that.

Further more the statement on Sahara reporters is just a press release and shouldn't be taken as the Gospel.

Funny this is coming up, when I was at that same age, in the late  nineties, the bold ones amongst my peers  who claimed they were "gays and lesbians" were given Council flats outrightly, whilst those of us non-gays were dumped in Hostels for youths for one year plus,  and forced to undergo some lifeskills BS Can you imagine, now in those times (gosh i feel so old now, lol) there was no such proliferation of computers aside from those in the Colleges which were heavily censored, we only had NNSPC and Childline and CAB and those Personal Advisers in Colleges, yet myself and my mates were aware of such underhanded tactics, now compare to the 1001 child centred organisation out there ramming down children's rights down our throat, now go figure


And  for example, now kids age 10 can get condoms, morning after pills, pregnant and have their School Nurse escort them to the Hospital to get an abortion without their Parents knowing nothing BECAUSE IT IS THESE CHILDREN'S HUMAN RIGHTS Kids aged 5 are being taught it is okay to have feelings for the opposite sex, etc,  SAD

Busy_body:


Funny this is coming up, when I was at that same age, in the late  nineties, the bold ones amongst my peers  who claimed they were "gays and lesbians" were given Council flats outrightly, whilst those of us non-gays were dumped in Hostels for youths for one year plus,  and forced to undergo some lifeskills BS Can you imagine, now in those times (gosh i feel so old now, lol) there was no such proliferation of computers aside from those in the Colleges which were heavily censored, we only had NNSPC and Childline and CAB and those Personal Advisers in Colleges, yet myself and my mates were aware of such underhanded tactics, now compare to the 1001 child centred organisation out there ramming down children's rights down our throat, now go figure


And  for example, now kids age 10 can get condoms, morning after pills, pregnant and have their School Nurse escort them to the Hospital to get an abortion without their Parents knowing nothing BECAUSE IT IS THESE CHILDREN'S HUMAN RIGHTS Kids aged 5 are being taught it is okay to have feelings for the opposite sex, etc,  SAD    

ROFLMAO!!!

Thank you for the example!

What a naive argument not to know what kids in the West are aware of considering the constant brainwash and anti-parent jargons they are directly fed in school as general information for their safety and "rights".

^^@BusyBody
Maybe because those who claimed they were gay didn't have a choice. Edirin did and there are other non gay organisations that could have done have also helped him apply for the same 'forced marriage order' or a 'child protection order' as he could have gone to them as a straight man and still said the same thing.

I was tempted too y'know, lol, but the fact that they were all given Homosexual (is this still politically correct ) made me change my mind sharp, sharp, knowing myself and my then i-will-try-anything-once spirit


*^whistling* Temptation get away from me
                               I need to shine like a likkle star
                           Away up there where the good souls are
                      Get away from me, but not too far

Gemma11:

^^@BusyBody
Maybe because those who claimed they were gay didn't have a choice. Edirin did and there are other non gay organisations that could have done have also helped him apply for the same 'forced marriage order' or a 'child protection order' as he could have gone to them as a straight man and still said the same thing.

You didn't get it, did you My friends are straight like a bat outta hell, if they were gay, of course we would know, common, surely

Reason he deduced going the gay route would be taken more seriously is simply because he knows the white man knows arranged marriages is the least of Nigerian worries, except for the Northerners who hardly travel out anyway, he knows a Nigerian will not be taken seriously and given asylum on the basis that there is war in his Country, he knows a Nigerian will not be taken seriously if he claims he is going to face honour killing if he is returned to his Country, he knows a Nigerian would not be taken seriously if he . . . get the drift. Heck he has even been violently threatening his Mum, jeez, gay people are always in tune with their feminine sides

Not saying there are no gay Nigerian teens out there though.

Busy_body:

You didn't get it, did you My friends are straight like a bat outta hell, if they were gay, of course we would know, common, surely

Reason he deduced going the gay route would be taken more seriously is simply because he knows the white man knows arranged marriages is the least of Nigerian worries, except for the Northerners who hardly travel out anyway, he knows a Nigerian will not be taken seriously and given asylum on the basis that there is war in his Country, he knows a Nigerian will not be taken seriously if he claims he is going to face honour killing if he is returned to his Country, he knows a Nigerian would not be taken seriously if he . . . get the drift. Heck he has even been violently threatening his Mum, jeez, gay people are always in tune with their feminine sides

Not saying there are no gay Nigerian teens out there though.

Thank you again.

I don't think she would ever get it.

Hey BusyBody

I did get it but you didn't get me. I understand your friends are straight but claimed to be gay in order to go to the top of the waiting list. Meanwhile those that didn't had to wait longer. You say that you were the same age as Edirin when you experienced this, 17. So the reason why I said that those who claimed gay to get a council flat asap rather than wait on the list had no choice was because they nowhere else to go because back then it was still the Council's responsibilty to house homeless 17 year olds, gay or not. I think that is still the case now but not sure.

Edirin's case is different. I notice you bring up seeking asylum and what not Edirin is a legal resident of the UK with indefinite leave to remain. He was not making a case against Immigration so I don't know why you brought up honour killings, ayslum etc. He is a teenager, old enough to move out of his parents house, get a job and even get married. Do you understand that he could have simply moved out of his parents house, joined the army, taken his UK passport and ran away from home etc? He did none of those things instead he chose to go to a gay organisation that helps troubled teens to seek help to make a claim against his parents.

Please excuse typos above- using phone.

Gemma11:

So the reason why I said that those who claimed gay to get a council flat asap rather than wait on the list had no choice was because they nowhere else to go.

I take it you know these people Busybody is talking about?

Busy_body:


F[b]unny this is coming up, when I was at that same age, in the late  nineties, the bold ones amongst my peers  who claimed they were "gays and lesbians" were given Council flats outrightly, whilst those of us non-gays were dumped in Hostels for youths for one year plus,  and forced to undergo some lifeskills BS Can you imagine,[/b] now in those times (gosh i feel so old now, lol) there was no such proliferation of computers aside from those in the Colleges which were heavily censored, we only had NNSPC and Childline and CAB and those Personal Advisers in Colleges, yet myself and my mates were aware of such underhanded tactics, now compare to the 1001 child centred organisation out there ramming down children's rights down our throat, now go figure


And  for example, now kids age 10 can get condoms, morning after pills, pregnant and have their School Nurse escort them to the Hospital to get an abortion without their Parents knowing nothing BECAUSE IT IS THESE CHILDREN'S HUMAN RIGHTS Kids aged 5 are being taught it is okay to have feelings for the opposite sex, etc,  SAD    

   "  "  if i talk now dem go sey i don carry my aproko-mouth come 

kai ! the mere suggestion that that boy edirin is gay is just absurd
     

dude is just toying with the system shikena

What is wrong with these stupid children who come from Naija to UK or US?
Is the western water too full of chemicals or what?
Most of them always go off the rails. I know countless idiots here as well who are more British then those of us born aboard theres really no need your skin colour gives you away no matter how western you act. The kids born and raised in the UK are much calmer than these ones they bring from aboard.

Now the mother is going to jail what a terrible shame.

,

Gemma11:

The fact he approached a organisation that supports gay teens speaks volumes.

I am Urhobo and I know the culture well. That being said I wouldn't put it past an Urhobo family to marry of their gay son asap in the hope to 'cure' him. Therefore the forced marrage claim by the boy is believable.

Nah the fact that he approached a Gay  organisation shows what a smart kid he is. He clearly knows that that Gay Rights Organisation carries more clout than all of those other organisations put together.

methinks Gemma is refusing to see reason

This boy is obviously another of the "very many" Nigerian-born miscreants in London who get into the wrong things in order to prove that they are now abroad. Many of them join up with wild Jamaicans etc. It is a well known phenomenon within the Nigerian communities in the London area. He played the system to try and stay in the UK because of a fear the unknown in Nigeria. He is back in Nigeria and he is having fun again, having met other kids his age. His mother, however, has paid a huge price for him to live a decent life.

I read somewhere that he twitters everyday about what he does in Nigeria now.

The British system is pathetic in respect of parenting and the laws surrounding it.

JustGood:

methinks Gemma is refusing to see reason

This boy is obviously another of the "very many" Nigerian-born miscreants in London who get into the wrong things in order to prove that they are now abroad. Many of them join up with wild Jamaicans etc. It is a well known phenomenon within the Nigerian communities in the London area. He played the system to try and stay in the UK because of a fear the unknown in Nigeria. He is back in Nigeria and he is having fun again, having met other kids his age. His mother, however, has paid a huge price for him to live a decent life.

I read somewhere that he twitters everyday about what he does in Nigeria now.

The British system is pathetic in respect of parenting and the laws surrounding it.

From his tweets it appears he is back in London?

Sorry approaching a gay organisation when you are not gay is odd. It is like a white person goign to an Asian organisation for help, doesn't make sense.

What happened to the other thread in Travel?

Gemma11:

Hey BusyBody

I did get it but you didn't get me. I understand your friends are straight but claimed to be gay in order to go to the top of the waiting list. Meanwhile those that didn't had to wait longer. You say that you were the same age as Edirin when you experienced this, 17. So the reason why I said that those who claimed gay to get a council flat asap rather than wait on the list had no choice was because they nowhere else to go because back then it was still the Council's responsibilty to house homeless 17 year olds, gay or not. I think that is still the case now but not sure.

Edirin's case is different. I notice you bring up seeking asylum and what not Edirin is a legal resident of the UK with indefinite leave to remain. He was not making a case against Immigration so I don't know why you brought up honour killings, ayslum etc. He is a teenager, old enough to move out of his parents house, get a job and even get married. Do you understand that he could have simply moved out of his parents house, joined the army, taken his UK passport and ran away from home etc? He did none of those things instead he chose to go to a gay organisation that helps troubled teens to seek help to make a claim against his parents.

Please excuse typos above- using phone.

Sorry to burst your bubble, generally people approach the Council for accommodation more because it is there for the taking, than because they need it, so they will cook up any story or falsify official documents to get one, hope you get the drift. Unlike the indigenous white parents, Nigerian parents don't kick out their wards age 16 and above and tell them to go fend for themselves, rather if they could, they keep you under their roof until they marry you off, so it is not like we had nowhere to go

Likewise, Edinrin's case is not different, he simply falsified those gay claims as a means to an end. Ordinarily, a Nigerian seeking to take out a Forced Protection Order against being forced to marry against his will, would have been treated with derision and scorn, HENCE REASON EDINRIN EMPLOYED THE DOUBLE-PRONGED APPROACH OF CLAIMING HE WAS GAY TOO, as Gayism (if such word exists) is a KNOWN TABOO in Africa. I know Edinrin is not seeking asylum, I never said he was either, I only furnished those examples to highlight the absurdity and ridiculous in this Edinrin matter, thats all.

Outta curosity, what do you have to say to his incessantly coming home late bruised and covered in blood and being lippy and threatening to harm his 'rents if they don't back off and quit querying him?

Chei, you enter battle of wits with Sagamite and you are still here unruffled, not spitting feathers and with not a single hair out of place, wow. Not saying you won cos I am always on the winning team but I like the calm composure and resilience spirit that you have maintained throughout so far, keep it up, it's refreshing and rare on Nairaland

JustGood:

methinks Gemma is refusing to see reason

This boy is obviously another of the "very many" Nigerian-born miscreants in London who get into the wrong things in order to prove that they are now abroad. Many of them join up with wild Jamaicans etc. It is a well known phenomenon within the Nigerian communities in the London area. He played the system to try and stay in the UK because of a fear the unknown in Nigeria. He is back in Nigeria and he is having fun again, having met other kids his age. His mother, however, has paid a huge price for him to live a decent life.

I read somewhere that he twitters everyday about what he does in Nigeria now.The British system is pathetic in respect of parenting and the laws surrounding it.

They always enjoy it back home though, what with the preferential treatment from the Staffs because Mummy has ^{mainly out of guilt of dumping them} bribed them to give him extra food, more comfortable bedding, more provision, favouritism from the Teachers, look of awe and admiring glances from their fellow students based on their "exotic" accents, ajebota mannerisms, a vast procession of Nannies, Maids, Drivers, etc at their beck and call, generous pocketmoney which goes a longer way, the wherewithal to be able to roll with the happening crowd in School, the Babes who can't get enough of them . . . whats not to like eh

ikamefa:

" " if i talk now dem go sey i don carry my aproko-mouth come

kai ! the mere suggestion that that boy edirin is gay is just absurd


dude is just toying with the system shikena

Oya spill jare, this shombo wants to hear

Busy_body:


Sorry to burst your bubble, generally people approach the Council for accommodation more because it is there for the taking, than because they need it, so they will cook up any story or falsify official documents to get one, hope you get the drift. Unlike the indigenous white parents, Nigerian parents don't kick out their wards age 16 and above and tell them to go fend for themselves, rather if they could, they keep you under their roof until they marry you off, so it is not like we had nowhere to go

Likewise, Edinrin's case is not different, he simply falsified those gay claims as a means to an end. Ordinarily, a Nigerian seeking to take out a Forced Protection Order against being forced to marry against his will, would have been treated with derision and scorn, HENCE REASON EDINRIN EMPLOYED THE DOUBLE-PRONGED APPROACH OF CLAIMING HE WAS GAY TOO, as Gayism (if such word exists) is a KNOWN TABOO in Africa. I know Edinrin is not seeking asylum, I never said he was either, I only furnished those examples to highlight the absurdity and ridiculous in this Edinrin matter, thats all.

Outta curosity, what do you have to say to his incessantly coming home late bruised and covered in blood and being lippy and threatening to harm his 'rents if they don't back off and quit querying him?

Chei, you enter battle of wits with Sagamite and you are still here unruffled, not spitting feathers and with not a single hair out of place, wow. Not saying you won cos I am always on the winning team but I like the calm composure and resilience spirit that you have maintained throughout so far, keep it up, it's refreshing and rare on Nairaland

Her saying that the Nigerians that claimed gay to get council flats only did it because they had no choice since they had nowhere to go really backs up my argument here https://www.nairaland.com/nigeria/topic-606299.96.html#msg7777345 that she is most likely still in her formative juvenile years.

You have said it all, the Nigerians claiming the council flats in the 90s where doing it because it was there for the taking. Not because of homelessness or being stranded after being kicked out.

Most took it and still stayed at home while renting it out and making easy money off a sillily socialist policy.

I am going soft on her and not engaging her because I spotted quickly and appreciated she is young and her brain, as well as knowledge, are still in development stages.

I be nice uncle na.