Confuzedman:
The thing juz weak me.she is a nice person generally

if that's the only reason, then maybe she is the one BANKROLLING the relationship #justmaybe#





Otherwise flee bro. Flee!!!

pocohantas:


There is no new Poco.

The old poco we know would find ways to blame the guy for trying to enslave the girl.


This November go good sha. Hehehe

Innobee99:
U are the first man that's angry for dodging a stray bullet

He still don't know what God has done for him

Davash222:

The old poco we know would find ways to blame the guy for trying to enslave the girl.


This November go good sha. Hehehe

There is no slavery in willingly cooking for a man you claim to love. I will only have a problem with it if he is unappreciative, unsupportive and unproductive. OP doesn’t strike me as all that.

pocohantas:


There is no slavery in willingly cooking for a man you claim to love. I will only have a problem with it if he is unappreciative, unsupportive and unproductive. OP doesn’t strike me as all that.

You concluded so fast on the OP, you know him?

UncleJJ:


She stayed in your house for a week! You sef no get conscience that's why the universe is teaching you a lesson.

Never ever in your life develop any serious interest in a girl who not living with her parents or guardian. Never in your life . You want the women who are very close to the home and I mean very close.

LOL !! @ some point we all have to leave our parent house abi ! i don't expect any female from 26yrs n above earning salary to still live under her parent.
The most important thing is home training, once she has it, where she stays is outrightly irrelevant.

Davash222:

You concluded so fast on the OP, you know him?

I don’t, but reading his post tells a lot. A typical alfa male would have said something like “this is a girl I feed, clothe, blablabla. Last month I bought her a phone”

Eishhh! Those ones make my brain go skrrrrrr!

pocohantas:


If all you said is true, permit me to say, your fiancee is not a smart human. She asked how you have been coping before she came? Well, now she is there, she should make herself useful!!

Sometime ago I was having a chat with my friend. He claims to be a strong defender of the patriarchy, but I still consider him one of the most rational Nigerian men. Anyway, he asked me a question;

Him: Is it bad if I EXPECT my wife to cook for me?

Me: NO, I can’t think of any reason that should be bad. I really do hope this answer isn’t because it is an easy thing for me, but heck NO!

Him: Does it make me chauvinist, misogynistic, wicked, entitled?

Me: Lol, Noooooo

I can’t remember everything we discussed, but he said something that struck. He said, what some people call gender roles is more of ACCOUNTABILITY. Someone has to be RESPONSIBLE for something, anything and everything.

I think it is okay to have REALISTIC expectations and even in offices, we have KPIs (the organization's EXPECTATIONS of us). We try hard to meet these expectations, but when it comes to marriage, we sharpen our mouths like a beak and start whining. Yet we wonder why marriages are failing. Why everyone is single but has so much opinion on relationships/marriages- #selflove generation.

These things spur us to be better and as long as they are done with love, respect and mutual interest/understanding, I would never see any wrong in them.

Marry/date people that have sense. Your fiancee doesn’t seem to be one.

@Pocohantas! Your parents did a great job.

pocohantas:


I don’t, but reading his post tells a lot. A typical alfa male would have said something like “this is a girl I feed, clothe, blablabla. Last month I bought her a phone”

Eishhh! Those ones make my brain go skrrrrrr!

You expected him to lie? He’s yet to buy those things for her na. Lol

There’s nothing wrong in listing your achievements in a dead relationship, lol. You know?

Confuzedman:
This is not a fiction, i had to create a new acct for advise. I have been dating my fiancee for over a year, tho it was a long distance stuff. Trouble began when she started visiting regularly. I noticed that whenever she comes, she’ll be reluctant to do certain things. When I get back from work, she will start acting like she is sick, somebody that was online all day. Later she said she doesn't know market,i got someone to buy foodstuffs for her, she still didn’t cook it. Whenever she visits, same story.I decided to have a talk with her over it, can you believe she said I am complaining too much. She asked if I haven’t been eating before she visited. I was heartbroken to hear that from her. As if that wasn’t enough, she said she is not marrying again and she isn’t a housegurl

I called her to talk after work today and she was still giving me attitude. Her friend is saying I was too harsh

Lalasticlala, plz help

Na God save you so

Davash222:


You expected him to lie? He’s yet to buy those things for her na. Lol

There’s nothing wrong in listing your achievements in a dead relationship, lol. You know?

Every Nigerian man has done that. I even read here that about 99% have.

I don’t know if it is wrong, but I particularly find it irritating. Whatever you did while the going was good, I like to think the person earned it or it is what you wanted to do at that time. Let it go...

pocohantas:


Every Nigerian man has done that. I even read here that about 99% have.

I don’t know if it is wrong, but I particularly find it irritating. Whatever you did while the going was good, I like to think the person earned it or it is what you wanted to do at that time. Let it go...

Heart break ain't a child's play. listing your achievements in a failed relationship might be a way for the person to heal.

Davash222:

Heart break ain't a child's play. listing your achievements in a failed relationship might be a way for the person to heal.

Okay! That was funny!

Innobee99:
U are the first man that's angry for dodging a stray bullet

i just weak

Mr Confuzedman what do want from marriage, what are your expectations regarding the roles and responsibilities of your wife, what kind of family do you want?

from your write up, you want a woman that cooks, which is fine. Now, your said fiancee is not ready to cook. Now you are a Confuzedman, why?

Some men need to start opening their eyes and going for women that embodies what they want.

Imagine you started trying to reason with her, so that is how you would be reasoning with her to cook for you if you had married her?

I will keep insisting that, men are the cause of their own early deaths, men are the architects of their own downfall, because they would see a woman that clearly has issues and would still be trying to reason with her

I have no pity for such men.

uruba23:


lol it is no excuse hello she is your visitor you treat her like a queen.

mumu

EmmaNuella77:
BTW

It is spelt fiancee - for the female
And fiance- for the males

Both are pronounced as
Fi-on-sei

Okay?

who asked you...Over sabi.

You are really a confuzed man....I know you will go and beg the nonentity later on..Weak nigga.

Jack005:
who asked you...Over sabi.

I'm a cheerful giver Abeg
Its for free and its for the betterment of other people

EmmaNuella77:





I'm a cheerful giver Abeg
Its for free and its for the betterment of other people

wow! I Iove cheerful givers. Biko give me mine.

pocohantas:


If all you said is true, permit me to say, your fiancee is not a smart human. She asked how you have been coping before she came? Well, now she is there, she should make herself useful!!

Sometime ago I was having a chat with my friend. He claims to be a strong defender of the patriarchy, but I still consider him one of the most rational Nigerian men. Anyway, he asked me a question;

Him: Is it bad if I EXPECT my wife to cook for me?

Me: NO, I can’t think of any reason that should be bad. I really do hope this answer isn’t because it is an easy thing for me, but heck NO!

Him: Does it make me chauvinist, misogynistic, wicked, entitled?

Me: Lol, Noooooo

I can’t remember everything we discussed, but he said something that struck. He said, what some people call gender roles is more of ACCOUNTABILITY. Someone has to be RESPONSIBLE for something, anything and everything.

I think it is okay to have REALISTIC expectations and even in offices, we have KPIs (the organization's EXPECTATIONS of us). We try hard to meet these expectations, but when it comes to marriage, we sharpen our mouths like a beak and start whining. Yet we wonder why marriages are failing. Why everyone is single but has so much opinion on relationships/marriages- #selflove generation.

These things spur us to be better and as long as they are done with love, respect and mutual interest/understanding, I would never see any wrong in them.

Marry/date people that have sense. Your fiancee doesn’t seem to be one.

.....Mama de mama.

Jack005:
wow! I Iove cheerful givers. Biko give me mine.

Give you what exactly?
Abeg I still dey find my destiny helper o

JONNYSPUTE:
.....Mama de mama.

I still dey wait your giveaway. Good morning, my oga.

MLTR:




LOL !! @ some point we all have to leave our parent house abi ! i don't expect any female from 26yrs n above earning salary to still live under her parent.
The most important thing is home training, once she has it, where she stays is outrightly irrelevant.

i disagree a bit. women mature differently plus age is nothing but a number

pocohantas:


Then let her go. It is either her values are fcked or you’re probably not the man she would do those things for.

@ confuzedman .. There lies your problem. You are not the guy she wants to do all those things for.

them they advice you .. you dey stubborn too.. marry her .. if she mumu no come complain oo.. else we go drag your generations here

uruba23:


lol it is no excuse hello she is your visitor you treat her like a queen.

If she is a queen then he supposed to be a king, if you watch africamagic epic movies where did you see a king pulling or holding a chair for his queen, imagine peter edochie with his constumes & crown in d kitchen, guards on standby. that wil be the last movie d director will produce you guyz got these miseducation of treat her like a queen, from a continent that don't even have traditional rulership.

Liposure:
i disagree a bit. women mature differently plus age is nothing but a number

Its your right to disagree, but you don't have to feel attacked, women mature differently buh @least way ahead of men. an 18yr old gurl is most definitely more mature than a 19yr old boy.
no matter the stunt growth a 26yr old lady is mature to have her own space or home.
Women get into marriage as early as 15,18 or 20 buh you can't see a boy of 20yrs wear a wedding suit even if he is dangote 1st son.
Age is not just a number for women cos it counts. men are wine & women are milk, put that into consideration with time.

Confuzedman:
The thing juz weak me.she is a nice person generally

Then marry her and hire a maid. Next please no time

MLTR:




Its your right to disagree, but you don't have to feel attacked, women mature differently buh @least way ahead of men. an 18yr old gurl is most definitely more mature than a 19yr old boy.
no matter the stunt growth a 26yr old lady is mature to have her own space or home.
Women get into marriage as early as 15,18 or 20 buh you can't see a boy of 20yrs wear a wedding suit even if he is dangote 1st son.
Age is not just a number for women cos it counts. men are wine & women are milk, put that into consideration with time.

we are both saying the same thing. I meant turning independent at an earlier age than 26

Liposure:
we are both saying the same thing. I meant turning independent at an earlier age than 26

Good to know. about the age 26 i cited that as a benchmark.