| Re: Would You Permit Your Partner To Be A Surrogate? by Liposure: 2:47pm On Dec 14, 2020 |
UndauntedYOCA:
I'd prefer egg donation to being a surrogate as I'm scared of childbirth, however, I would most def love to.have 4 kids and then adopt 2 or more since there are many kids who deserve to.be loved and taken care of and of course, I have so much love to give. Na money remain and perhaps, husband.
If your husband doesn't approve of it then don't do it, you were fit back then doesn't mean you'll be fit this time. Plus, you aren't married to yourself, you're married to.your husband. mother theresa |
| Re: Would You Permit Your Partner To Be A Surrogate? by UndauntedYOCA(f): 2:48pm On Dec 14, 2020 |
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| Re: Would You Permit Your Partner To Be A Surrogate? by queenfav(f): 2:54pm On Dec 14, 2020 |
I admire you...For me,i saw hell carrying my own child..I won't do it for another!Also the love i have for my baby wouldn't be this strong if someone had carried her pregnancy,then handed her over to me.Naturally humans never appreciate things that come easy.
Also,do you honestly think you will have no qualms handing over the baby at birth, without some sort of emotional attachment? My kind of person,i would want to be in that child's life even as a family friend... It's really tough, except you are doing it for strictly financial reasons.
Lastly every pregnancy is a risk.What if you get some sort of pregnancy induced illness or complication.It's not after every pregnancy you get the luxury of a 100% snapback o.tlTrust me ,i know first hand!My baby is a almost a year old and i still get bad waist pains,plus i am battling with ketorasis pilaris which i never had pre pregnancy.So think about it... Also very few Nigerian men would stand by and support you while you carry a child that isn't theirs for 9 months! 2 Likes |
| Re: Would You Permit Your Partner To Be A Surrogate? by Nobody: 3:01pm On Dec 14, 2020 |
squad03:
I have been pondering on this for several years and I'll appreciate the inputs of good people on this forum.
Way before I got married,I had considered that should I encounter any delay in childbearing,I would be open to 'unconventional' means like IVF, Surrogacy or adoption.
Thankfully,I didn't encounter any delay and my husband and I have had 2 kids.I am not keen to have any more kids but my husband is open to more so we are keeping our fingers for a few more years.
Despite having completed my family (maybe temporarily), I have always kept on my mind the urge to volunteer to be a surrogate for another family.Why not since pregnancy treats me really well,my body snaps right back and I hardly experience that postpartum drag, it's a superpower I feel bad about going to waste since I probably won't be having anymore kids for myself.
Over the years,I have encountered couples I would gladly have engaged in this conversation but every time I run it past my husband (before I get their hopes up) he shoots the idea down.
I found it quite odd at first until I read about a woman who after 2 kids died during childbirth as a surrogate for another couple. That was scary for me but it didn't quite dampen the desire.
The first couple I spoke to him about are friends of ours who have been making efforts and he said he appreciates my kindness but that this is Nigeria where nothing is black and white and he wouldn't want any troubles as a result of it.
I paused for a bit.
We have all been friends for a while since we were all single and there's an adage in Yoruba that translates to 'Communual eating isn't sweet if one person doesn't contribute' and there has been that silent wedge even though it's often ignored.
For me, I can hardly see the downside to this,granted I will have to pause my career for just a few months during the advanced stage or early postpartum phase but that pales in comparison to going on the journey with a friend who can be a part of it every step of the way,can come to Antenatal and ultrasound scans..it's exciting to me.They will be rest assured that I will be taking all the right steps to ensure perfectly healthy babies.Please bear in mind that the baby(ies) will be 100% theirs (husband's sperm and his wife's eggs),I will just be a happy incubator.
There are legal aspects I am happy to follow through as they please and this is no quest for financial gains as my family is more than comfortable.
I also have a cousin who has been trying for a baby but has medical conditions which have hindered this so far and I will do this for her in a heartbeat but I have to convince my husband to allow me.
I have been having sleepless nights about it and I'm hoping that since it's family this time,he won't hesitate to give me his blessings considering it's a sacrifice for him as well.This is the only time I can take this break in my career and I want it to be meaningful.
God answers prayers in diverse ways,maybe this is it for my cousin.
Husbands in the house,how will you react to such a request from your spouse?
Wives,can you volunteer to be a surrogate?
Parents-to-be,will you allow known persons to be surrogates for you or have you considered any downsides to it?
I come in peace and for the love of babies,may the joy go round.
It's a nice thought. Really beautiful but everything has a consequence. Sarah , the wife of Abraham tried to help God to perform a miracle. She gave her servant(Hagar) to her husband for a wife . They finally gave birth to a child called Ishmael (God didn't still accept him as the child of promise). Ismael was called the child of the bond woman while Isaac was of the freebond(It has a more deeper spiritual effects). Ismael(the founder of....)grew (carnally ) and stood up against Isaac the (Father of Israel) till date(Spiritual sense will tell you what am talking about. Right now, Ismael descendants are living in the land they were given by Abraham (the oil rich land), while Israel occupy dry land in Asian continent. Ismael(son of the bond woman) and Israel( freeborn) are ever at war . The error Sarah made is ever affecting the descendants of Israel. War all over her borders . She' hated without a cause but all came from Sarah. Think on this !! There's another one: A woman called Naomi: lost her husband and her two sons; she decided to return back to her people . One of her daughter in-laws( Ruth) made up her mind to follow her. The other refused and remained . Ruth was later the grand mother of David in the bible while the other was the grand mother of the five giants David and his men killed. This was a matter of decision. Don't help God to perform His miracle. His time is not your time , He's eternity. The best you can do for your friends is to pray for them or to adopt. However, this is merely an advice , you are free to do whatever pleases you. I wish i can explain more especially on the first example but this is a social platform 2 Likes |
| Re: Would You Permit Your Partner To Be A Surrogate? by Obioramichael(m): 3:03pm On Dec 14, 2020 |
A little question before I give my take on this..
Should incase your husband accepts your kind gesture to help
1. During the 9 months that you will be pregnant where will you stay?.. With your husband or with the family you will be having the child or children for?
I. If answer is with the family
2. Are you going there with your children or you are going to leave the children with your husband for the whole nine months to run their affairs
ii. If the answer (to number 1 questions) is with your husband
3. So all those little and tough nagging women give while pregnant would be channeled to a man who is aware that the child isn't his.. Hope you are not going to wake him up in the middle of the night to massage your legs while carrying another man's pregnancy..
4. Hope you will be ready to give him sex any time and in any position you guys have been having it before the pregnancy?
5. Hope you won't judge him when he starts looking outside for pleasure during the period you will be pregnant..
6. Hope you won't be angry if he ends up having a child from another woman since you are a lover of children who loves helping to put a smile on people's face by serving as an incubator but is still keeping your hands crossed when it comes to serving as an incubator to give your husband more kids..
You need to consider this before going ahead with those actions..
AND Finally, hope you won't go back to claim anything in future if things go south...
For my take on this your question.. My answer IS... I'M SOFT HEARTED BUT MY WIFE MUST ACCEPT THIS TERMS AND CONDITIONS BEFORE I GIVE MY GO AHEAD ODER.. 7 Likes |
| Re: Would You Permit Your Partner To Be A Surrogate? by repent4christ: 3:10pm On Dec 14, 2020 |
You have the capacity to endure and surrogate for another but don't want to have more kids? And you think because God had given you grace to birth easily you want to abuse it.....It's because your husband is soft that's why you have the guts to bring this nonsense or maybe your jobless...if am your husband I get you pregnant...you must bear more children to keep you busy....Surrogate kor....take foolish risk for another ni. 2 Likes |
| Re: Would You Permit Your Partner To Be A Surrogate? by meobizy(f): 3:19pm On Dec 14, 2020 |
All these professional writers, sha. At least it was a more enjoyable read than the normal chicken dribble some people pen here. The only solution is for this dream to remain a fantasy. If you divorce while still young then you can engage in the venture. Look at it from another angle; will you accept your husband to donate his sperm to help another family? Such deep thought can reveal how selfish your idea is. |
| Re: Would You Permit Your Partner To Be A Surrogate? by Twenty8: 3:22pm On Dec 14, 2020 |
900warriorz:
Why would my Wife carry another person's child?
I'm proudly African fa  Can you believe the what this woman is saying fa? You want to carry another man's child, and you expect a correct/undiluted/unmixed/unwashed African man to treat you like a baby during pregnancy? Olorun ma je |
| Re: Would You Permit Your Partner To Be A Surrogate? by annyz: 3:34pm On Dec 14, 2020 |
squad03:
I have been pondering on this for several years and I'll appreciate the inputs of good people on this forum.
Way before I got married,I had considered that should I encounter any delay in childbearing,I would be open to 'unconventional' means like IVF, Surrogacy or adoption.
Thankfully,I didn't encounter any delay and my husband and I have had 2 kids.I am not keen to have any more kids but my husband is open to more so we are keeping our fingers for a few more years.
Despite having completed my family (maybe temporarily), I have always kept on my mind the urge to volunteer to be a surrogate for another family.Why not since pregnancy treats me really well,my body snaps right back and I hardly experience that postpartum drag, it's a superpower I feel bad about going to waste since I probably won't be having anymore kids for myself.
Over the years,I have encountered couples I would gladly have engaged in this conversation but every time I run it past my husband (before I get their hopes up) he shoots the idea down.
I found it quite odd at first until I read about a woman who after 2 kids died during childbirth as a surrogate for another couple. That was scary for me but it didn't quite dampen the desire.
The first couple I spoke to him about are friends of ours who have been making efforts and he said he appreciates my kindness but that this is Nigeria where nothing is black and white and he wouldn't want any troubles as a result of it.
I paused for a bit.
We have all been friends for a while since we were all single and there's an adage in Yoruba that translates to 'Communual eating isn't sweet if one person doesn't contribute' and there has been that silent wedge even though it's often ignored.
For me, I can hardly see the downside to this,granted I will have to pause my career for just a few months during the advanced stage or early postpartum phase but that pales in comparison to going on the journey with a friend who can be a part of it every step of the way,can come to Antenatal and ultrasound scans..it's exciting to me.They will be rest assured that I will be taking all the right steps to ensure perfectly healthy babies.Please bear in mind that the baby(ies) will be 100% theirs (husband's sperm and his wife's eggs),I will just be a happy incubator.
There are legal aspects I am happy to follow through as they please and this is no quest for financial gains as my family is more than comfortable.
I also have a cousin who has been trying for a baby but has medical conditions which have hindered this so far and I will do this for her in a heartbeat but I have to convince my husband to allow me.
I have been having sleepless nights about it and I'm hoping that since it's family this time,he won't hesitate to give me his blessings considering it's a sacrifice for him as well.This is the only time I can take this break in my career and I want it to be meaningful.
God answers prayers in diverse ways,maybe this is it for my cousin.
Husbands in the house,how will you react to such a request from your spouse?
Wives,can you volunteer to be a surrogate?
Parents-to-be,will you allow known persons to be surrogates for you or have you considered any downsides to it?
I come in peace and for the love of babies,may the joy go round.
Just say u want to have a taste of another man sperm inside you. Why not get pregnant and have more kids for your husband. Your are just trying to fetch ants infected fire wood & hope u will not start groaning when lizards starts visiting u. |
| Re: Would You Permit Your Partner To Be A Surrogate? by Twenty8: 3:35pm On Dec 14, 2020 |
squad03:
I have been pondering on this for several years and I'll appreciate the inputs of good people on this forum.
Way before I got married,I had considered that should I encounter any delay in childbearing,I would be open to 'unconventional' means like IVF, Surrogacy or adoption.
Thankfully,I didn't encounter any delay and my husband and I have had 2 kids.I am not keen to have any more kids but my husband is ope more so we are keeping our fingers for a few more years.
Despite having completed my family (maybe temporarily), I have always kept on my mind the urge to volunteer to be a surrogate for another family.Why not since pregnancy treats me really well,my body snaps right back and I hardly experience that postpartum drag, it's a superpower I feel bad about going to waste since I probably won't be having anymore kids for myself.
Over the years,I have encountered couples I would gladly have engaged in this conversation but every time I run it past my husband (before I get their hopes up) he shoots the idea down.
I found it quite odd at first until I read about a woman who after 2 kids died during childbirth as a surrogate for another couple. That was scary for me but it didn't quite dampen the desire.
The first couple I spoke to him about are friends of ours who have been making efforts and he said he appreciates my kindness but that this is Nigeria where nothing is black and white and he wouldn't want any troubles as a result of it.
I paused for a bit.
We have all been friends for a while since we were all single and there's an adage in Yoruba that translates to 'Communual eating isn't sweet if one person doesn't contribute' and there has been that silent wedge even though it's often ignored.
For me, I can hardly see the downside to this,granted I will have to pause my career for just a few months during the advanced stage or early postpartum phase but that pales in comparison to going on the journey with a friend who can be a part of it every step of the way,can come to Antenatal and ultrasound scans..it's exciting to me.They will be rest assured that I will be taking all the right steps to ensure perfectly healthy babies.Please bear in mind that the baby(ies) will be 100% theirs (husband's sperm and his wife's eggs),I will just be a happy incubator.
There are legal aspects I am happy to follow through as they please and this is no quest for financial gains as my family is more than comfortable.
I also have a cousin who has been trying for a baby but has medical conditions which have hindered this so far and I will do this for her in a heartbeat but I have to convince my husband to allow me.
I have been having sleepless nights about it and I'm hoping that since it's family this time,he won't hesitate to give me his blessings considering it's a sacrifice for him as well.This is the only time I can take this break in my career and I want it to be meaningful.
God answers prayers in diverse ways,maybe this is it for my cousin.
Husbands in the house,how will you react to such a request from your spouse?
Wives,can you volunteer to be a surrogate?
Parents-to-be,will you allow known persons to be surrogates for you or have you considered any downsides to it?
I come in peace and for the love of babies,may the joy go round.
Why do you desire to match a sleeping tiger's tail? My own answer is that NEVER. Does |
| Re: Would You Permit Your Partner To Be A Surrogate? by Asiseeit: 3:47pm On Dec 14, 2020 |
For how much o? |
| Re: Would You Permit Your Partner To Be A Surrogate? by gidado14(m): 3:58pm On Dec 14, 2020 |
squad03:
I have been pondering on this for several years and I'll appreciate the inputs of good people on this forum.
Way before I got married,I had considered that should I encounter any delay in childbearing,I would be open to 'unconventional' means like IVF, Surrogacy or adoption.
Thankfully,I didn't encounter any delay and my husband and I have had 2 kids.I am not keen to have any more kids but my husband is open to more so we are keeping our fingers for a few more years.
Despite having completed my family (maybe temporarily), I have always kept on my mind the urge to volunteer to be a surrogate for another family.Why not since pregnancy treats me really well,my body snaps right back and I hardly experience that postpartum drag, it's a superpower I feel bad about going to waste since I probably won't be having anymore kids for myself.
Over the years,I have encountered couples I would gladly have engaged in this conversation but every time I run it past my husband (before I get their hopes up) he shoots the idea down.
I found it quite odd at first until I read about a woman who after 2 kids died during childbirth as a surrogate for another couple. That was scary for me but it didn't quite dampen the desire.
The first couple I spoke to him about are friends of ours who have been making efforts and he said he appreciates my kindness but that this is Nigeria where nothing is black and white and he wouldn't want any troubles as a result of it.
I paused for a bit.
We have all been friends for a while since we were all single and there's an adage in Yoruba that translates to 'Communual eating isn't sweet if one person doesn't contribute' and there has been that silent wedge even though it's often ignored.
For me, I can hardly see the downside to this,granted I will have to pause my career for just a few months during the advanced stage or early postpartum phase but that pales in comparison to going on the journey with a friend who can be a part of it every step of the way,can come to Antenatal and ultrasound scans..it's exciting to me.They will be rest assured that I will be taking all the right steps to ensure perfectly healthy babies.Please bear in mind that the baby(ies) will be 100% theirs (husband's sperm and his wife's eggs),I will just be a happy incubator.
There are legal aspects I am happy to follow through as they please and this is no quest for financial gains as my family is more than comfortable.
I also have a cousin who has been trying for a baby but has medical conditions which have hindered this so far and I will do this for her in a heartbeat but I have to convince my husband to allow me.
I have been having sleepless nights about it and I'm hoping that since it's family this time,he won't hesitate to give me his blessings considering it's a sacrifice for him as well.This is the only time I can take this break in my career and I want it to be meaningful.
God answers prayers in diverse ways,maybe this is it for my cousin.
Husbands in the house,how will you react to such a request from your spouse?
Wives,can you volunteer to be a surrogate?
Parents-to-be,will you allow known persons to be surrogates for you or have you considered any downsides to it?
I come in peace and for the love of babies,may the joy go round.
hell no either me or him
|
| Re: Would You Permit Your Partner To Be A Surrogate? by Rossycee(f): 4:22pm On Dec 14, 2020 |
squad03:
I have been pondering on this for several years and I'll appreciate the inputs of good people on this forum.
Way before I got married,I had considered that should I encounter any delay in childbearing,I would be open to 'unconventional' means like IVF, Surrogacy or adoption.
Thankfully,I didn't encounter any delay and my husband and I have had 2 kids.I am not keen to have any more kids but my husband is open to more so we are keeping our fingers for a few more years.
Despite having completed my family (maybe temporarily), I have always kept on my mind the urge to volunteer to be a surrogate for another family.Why not since pregnancy treats me really well,my body snaps right back and I hardly experience that postpartum drag, it's a superpower I feel bad about going to waste since I probably won't be having anymore kids for myself.
Over the years,I have encountered couples I would gladly have engaged in this conversation but every time I run it past my husband (before I get their hopes up) he shoots the idea down.
I found it quite odd at first until I read about a woman who after 2 kids died during childbirth as a surrogate for another couple. That was scary for me but it didn't quite dampen the desire.
The first couple I spoke to him about are friends of ours who have been making efforts and he said he appreciates my kindness but that this is Nigeria where nothing is black and white and he wouldn't want any troubles as a result of it.
I paused for a bit.
We have all been friends for a while since we were all single and there's an adage in Yoruba that translates to 'Communual eating isn't sweet if one person doesn't contribute' and there has been that silent wedge even though it's often ignored.
For me, I can hardly see the downside to this,granted I will have to pause my career for just a few months during the advanced stage or early postpartum phase but that pales in comparison to going on the journey with a friend who can be a part of it every step of the way,can come to Antenatal and ultrasound scans..it's exciting to me.They will be rest assured that I will be taking all the right steps to ensure perfectly healthy babies.Please bear in mind that the baby(ies) will be 100% theirs (husband's sperm and his wife's eggs),I will just be a happy incubator.
There are legal aspects I am happy to follow through as they please and this is no quest for financial gains as my family is more than comfortable.
I also have a cousin who has been trying for a baby but has medical conditions which have hindered this so far and I will do this for her in a heartbeat but I have to convince my husband to allow me.
I have been having sleepless nights about it and I'm hoping that since it's family this time,he won't hesitate to give me his blessings considering it's a sacrifice for him as well.This is the only time I can take this break in my career and I want it to be meaningful.
God answers prayers in diverse ways,maybe this is it for my cousin.
Husbands in the house,how will you react to such a request from your spouse?
Wives,can you volunteer to be a surrogate?
Parents-to-be,will you allow known persons to be surrogates for you or have you considered any downsides to it?
I come in peace and for the love of babies,may the joy go round.
Your kind is rare though, you sound like one with a good heart. My dear this is Africa and most men won't allow that. If your husband is not in support please let it slide. Also think about it in two different ways, what if something goes wrong or a problem emerges in the future can you handle it. I will advice you to continue to pray for them, depending on how long they have been married you can advice them to try adoption while believing God to bless them with their own children. 1 Like |
| Re: Would You Permit Your Partner To Be A Surrogate? by Chrissygolg(f): 4:25pm On Dec 14, 2020 |
This all hose down on self thought and well consideration. On my opinion this side of the world don't welcome every decision so meditate some more or seek counseling from an experienced like. 1 Like |
| Re: Would You Permit Your Partner To Be A Surrogate? by CorperKola: 4:26pm On Dec 14, 2020 |
this post makes me think you should consider psychological and psychiatric test for your intended spouse before marriage just to avoid stuffs like these |
|
| Re: Would You Permit Your Partner To Be A Surrogate? by EricSmallz(m): 4:35pm On Dec 14, 2020 |
UndauntedYOCA:
Lol, I love kids! I could adopt before I have mine, while having mine or after I must had mine. Koko is to adopt. That's great. I am from a very wide family. I like kids though, but I don't think I can accommodate more than two. |
| Re: Would You Permit Your Partner To Be A Surrogate? by DarkJeddi(m): 4:40pm On Dec 14, 2020 |
[quote author=futurerex post=97059112][/quote] Yes,the Corpse of another always seems like a log of wood to the bystander..  |
| Re: Would You Permit Your Partner To Be A Surrogate? by Nobody: 4:50pm On Dec 14, 2020 |
slawormiir:
Damnnn niggarrrr
Isoright....grab my Hennessey and my weed while i seek for knowledge on this topic
A real niggar should always smoke some weed, bang enough pussy, drink some bottles, make some dope money and SEEK FOR KNOWLEDGE anyday anytime twice on Monday especially on topic like this that is almost beyond his comprehension
Am going to put on my intellectual cap while blazing my weed as i perused and read between lines on every comment on this topic stop stereotyping the plant. |
| Re: Would You Permit Your Partner To Be A Surrogate? by Kentuforchrist(m): 5:10pm On Dec 14, 2020 |
Jesus!
Wat on Earth is wrong with u Nigeria must u copy everything from the West.
How can u be a surrogate just to please other people.....my dear it will end in premium tears.
If my wife tell me this kind thing,I go just slap that her mouth |
| Re: Would You Permit Your Partner To Be A Surrogate? by cococandy(f): 5:11pm On Dec 14, 2020 |
Reading the responses OP is getting. Lack of comprehension everywhere.
At topic, I guess the question is for guys but I understand if a man is genuinely concerned and says no. Giving birth is indeed a life and death matter. I applaud you for even thinking of it for charity. It’s not an easy plight 3 Likes |
| Re: Would You Permit Your Partner To Be A Surrogate? by cococandy(f): 5:14pm On Dec 14, 2020 |
Sad sad Obioramichael:
A little question before I give my take on this..
Should incase your husband accepts your kind gesture to help
1. During the 9 months that you will be pregnant where will you stay?.. With your husband or with the family you will be having the child or children for?
I. If answer is with the family
2. Are you going there with your children or you are going to leave the children with your husband for the whole nine months to run their affairs
ii. If the answer (to number 1 questions) is with your husband
3. So all those little and tough nagging women give while pregnant would be channeled to a man who is aware that the child isn't his.. Hope you are not going to wake him up in the middle of the night to massage your legs while carrying another man's pregnancy..
4. Hope you will be ready to give him sex any time and in any position you guys have been having it before the pregnancy?
5. Hope you won't judge him when he starts looking outside for pleasure during the period you will be pregnant..
6. Hope you won't be angry if he ends up having a child from another woman since you are a lover of children who loves helping to put a smile on people's face by serving as an incubator but is still keeping your hands crossed when it comes to serving as an incubator to give your husband more kids..
You need to consider this before going ahead with those actions..
AND Finally, hope you won't go back to claim anything in future if things go south...
For my take on this your question.. My answer IS... I'M SOFT HEARTED BUT MY WIFE MUST ACCEPT THIS TERMS AND CONDITIONS BEFORE I GIVE MY GO AHEAD ODER..
1 Like |
| Re: Would You Permit Your Partner To Be A Surrogate? by Coinbased: 5:34pm On Dec 14, 2020 |
no |
| Re: Would You Permit Your Partner To Be A Surrogate? by jonalbert: 5:49pm On Dec 14, 2020 |
PatientFusion allows patients and/or patient-authorized representatives to view, download and transmit patient health record data directly from the patient portal. |
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| Re: Would You Permit Your Partner To Be A Surrogate? by Ultimategeneral: 5:50pm On Dec 14, 2020 |
The part where she wrote; "and I will be a happy incubator"  seriously, nigga like myself couldn't comprehend that. |
| Re: Would You Permit Your Partner To Be A Surrogate? by candygirl4real: 6:00pm On Dec 14, 2020 |
Na wa oh...people are really thinking realistically indeed. |
| Re: Would You Permit Your Partner To Be A Surrogate? by Raskasal(m): 6:34pm On Dec 14, 2020 |
I would only allow my wife do it on a medical term and if the party involved is a close family member. What I mean is if the process of sperm collection and transfusion will be through IVF. More so there are ladies now who opted to be a ful time surrogate mother due to the monetisation involved, speak to a doc, and they'll get one for you. |
| Re: Would You Permit Your Partner To Be A Surrogate? by shigishege: 6:46pm On Dec 14, 2020 |
Wonder shall never end for dis nija. Another man's sperm in ur own body? What a shameful woman! |
| Re: Would You Permit Your Partner To Be A Surrogate? by ebullient19(f): 8:18pm On Dec 14, 2020 |
Wahala dey like bicycle
Lol |
|
| Re: Would You Permit Your Partner To Be A Surrogate? by ThinkSmarter: 9:19pm On Dec 14, 2020 |
squad03:
I have been pondering on this for several years and I'll appreciate the inputs of good people on this forum.
Way before I got married,I had considered that should I encounter any delay in childbearing,I would be open to 'unconventional' means like IVF, Surrogacy or adoption.
Thankfully,I didn't encounter any delay and my husband and I have had 2 kids.I am not keen to have any more kids but my husband is open to more so we are keeping our fingers for a few more years.
Despite having completed my family (maybe temporarily), I have always kept on my mind the urge to volunteer to be a surrogate for another family.Why not since pregnancy treats me really well,my body snaps right back and I hardly experience that postpartum drag, it's a superpower I feel bad about going to waste since I probably won't be having anymore kids for myself.
Over the years,I have encountered couples I would gladly have engaged in this conversation but every time I run it past my husband (before I get their hopes up) he shoots the idea down.
I found it quite odd at first until I read about a woman who after 2 kids died during childbirth as a surrogate for another couple. That was scary for me but it didn't quite dampen the desire.
The first couple I spoke to him about are friends of ours who have been making efforts and he said he appreciates my kindness but that this is Nigeria where nothing is black and white and he wouldn't want any troubles as a result of it.
I paused for a bit.
We have all been friends for a while since we were all single and there's an adage in Yoruba that translates to 'Communual eating isn't sweet if one person doesn't contribute' and there has been that silent wedge even though it's often ignored.
For me, I can hardly see the downside to this,granted I will have to pause my career for just a few months during the advanced stage or early postpartum phase but that pales in comparison to going on the journey with a friend who can be a part of it every step of the way,can come to Antenatal and ultrasound scans..it's exciting to me.They will be rest assured that I will be taking all the right steps to ensure perfectly healthy babies.Please bear in mind that the baby(ies) will be 100% theirs (husband's sperm and his wife's eggs),I will just be a happy incubator.
There are legal aspects I am happy to follow through as they please and this is no quest for financial gains as my family is more than comfortable.
I also have a cousin who has been trying for a baby but has medical conditions which have hindered this so far and I will do this for her in a heartbeat but I have to convince my husband to allow me.
I have been having sleepless nights about it and I'm hoping that since it's family this time,he won't hesitate to give me his blessings considering it's a sacrifice for him as well.This is the only time I can take this break in my career and I want it to be meaningful.
God answers prayers in diverse ways,maybe this is it for my cousin.
Husbands in the house,how will you react to such a request from your spouse?
Wives,can you volunteer to be a surrogate?
Parents-to-be,will you allow known persons to be surrogates for you or have you considered any downsides to it?
I come in peace and for the love of babies,may the joy go round.
U got the heart of Gold. U re amazing. U don't reason like a typical Nigerian . U re like Mother Theresa. Please do convince your husband that you are doing that for love, for humanity. To put smiles on the face of loved ones. To bring peoples hope alive. This is commendable I must tell you . U appears to be way more enlightened than your husband. Ur husband seems to be very traditional. He may likely be conforming to the archaic societal rules where sentiments and stereotypes are attached to every human actions. I wish you good luck in your adventure towards bringing joy and laughter to families. May whatever you believe in Bless you and guide you. With love Abakaliki. Daalanu Nne, Ezigbo Nwanyi 1 Like |
