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I Engaged My Girlfriend, Now I Am Thinking Of Calling Off The Engagement - Romance (19) - Nairaland

Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Romance / I Engaged My Girlfriend, Now I Am Thinking Of Calling Off The Engagement (58316 Views)

I Broke Up With My Girlfriend Now Shes Back But I Am Confused / My Ex Girlfriend Now Hates Me / Man Proposing To His Fiancée Misplaced The Engagement Ring (pics) (2) (3) (4)

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Re: I Engaged My Girlfriend, Now I Am Thinking Of Calling Off The Engagement by Excel99: 6:05pm On Jan 16, 2021
My two Kobo advise is that, you can't change anyone. Only God has the prerogative to change people. If you go on to marry her, be prepared for consistent heart break. Even if she leaves that guy, there will be another. I like to ask though, have you made her to reach orgasm. Are you a selfish lover in the bed. This could be key

1 Like

Re: I Engaged My Girlfriend, Now I Am Thinking Of Calling Off The Engagement by Hassanmaye(m): 6:06pm On Jan 16, 2021
lordswill03:
I had exactly similar experience! Now I'm married to her.... Alot to tell you but then can't type here. If you can send me a chat on 08038322116
Abeg tell me your experience
Re: I Engaged My Girlfriend, Now I Am Thinking Of Calling Off The Engagement by Hassanmaye(m): 6:18pm On Jan 16, 2021
Komu1048:



Bro, continue getting close to the new girl and make her your companion. The fact that the girl is able to leave you for a while to form one yeye vex without wanting to reconcile, means she didn’t love you like you do to her and she sees the other guy as a better choice and that’s why the small love she had for you is fading away cox the dude calls her and she will be more than happy to jump on his arm. How you guys fall in love is still a mirage to me, wetin dem Dey give una chop or how e Dey be sef

Maybe, the way I was brought up sha. I didn’t grow up under this lovy lovy, my dad a confirm redpiller. My mum will even be happy any day she receive hug n I’m just a better version.
grin grin grin
Re: I Engaged My Girlfriend, Now I Am Thinking Of Calling Off The Engagement by Hassanmaye(m): 6:19pm On Jan 16, 2021
silento:
Op u are mumu I have an ex who is married our chat on WhatsApp is Hi and xup trust she has begged me many times to Bleep her on call

Girls are more wiser in relationship than we guys use ur brain the guy is get a good respond that's why they keep talking on phone ur girl is smart u are just mumu here
Will you bang
Re: I Engaged My Girlfriend, Now I Am Thinking Of Calling Off The Engagement by Hassanmaye(m): 6:21pm On Jan 16, 2021
Bolaji26:
Bro.. You are on your own. .


We are in the same shoe.


I have engaged mine too and she has this guy that always call her on the phone, we fought about it and she told me Ntn is between them.



I started feeling uncomfortable the day i heard dem flirting on voice call, so I decided to spy on her WhatsApp and succeeded but couldn't see anything suspicious in her chat.


Week Leta, i was spying on her WhatsApp and my mind just say make i go check her achirve .


O boy, Wat i saw ehn, she always Archive that guy chat.




I compile all d evidence and broke up with her d nxt day
.

Trust those hoes at ur own Peri

kiss
Abeg what do you by archieve
Re: I Engaged My Girlfriend, Now I Am Thinking Of Calling Off The Engagement by DrayZee: 6:26pm On Jan 16, 2021
Siberry:



Rubbish. I talk to my husband every fucking day except the days he accuse me of some stupid shit. There is more to life than men and sex. Let love pay the bills naa. Yea when it's time to pay for rent, put food on the table, sort out energy bills, go flash love to them and they will give you receipt.
Your case is very very different. The OP knows there’s an actual person who carries her attention. She always calls him but never texts. You think that isn’t worthy of suspicion?
All of that aside, she’s a 22 year old Nigerian girl. It wouldn’t be a surprise if his suspicions are actually happening.
Re: I Engaged My Girlfriend, Now I Am Thinking Of Calling Off The Engagement by Hassanmaye(m): 6:26pm On Jan 16, 2021
Focusmind:
OP, I just pity you. Despite people's reservations and comments, you seemed more determined in defending her.

Oga discharge her immediately and move on. Marriage no be joke o but una no go hear. Ok na, just continue.
No na leave the Mumu abeg

2 Likes

Re: I Engaged My Girlfriend, Now I Am Thinking Of Calling Off The Engagement by Bolaji26(m): 6:35pm On Jan 16, 2021
Hassanmaye:

Abeg what do you by archieve

Achirve can be use to save important msgs /page.


It is also a collection of data moved to a repository for backup, to keep separate for compliance reasons

1 Like

Re: I Engaged My Girlfriend, Now I Am Thinking Of Calling Off The Engagement by Yadid(m): 6:54pm On Jan 16, 2021
Serene123:


Explain further Bro


This is it. Gather yourself together. Relationship/marriage is not do or die. By saying you should be disinterested, I mean stop seeing the continuity of the relationship as if she's doing you the biggest favour in life. On the other hand, don't also see the ending of the relationship as the biggest loss in life. Have this attitude of whether it works hereafter or not, it is all in your favour. Show her this attitude and she will surely be rattled to be upfront with you. More so, being disinterested is essential for your well-being. Just be like a judge or an outsider trying to figure out what is going on really.
Re: I Engaged My Girlfriend, Now I Am Thinking Of Calling Off The Engagement by Bahddo(m): 7:00pm On Jan 16, 2021
Serene123:
Please I will need your constructive opinion on this. Been battling with this thoughts for some time now.

I engaged my girl last year. Reason why I did engage her was because I saw her intent to be with me. I have seen her gave out her cash to help get somethings for our new apartment. She has even used her cash to buy some properties she wants in the house when we get married.
She has stood and defended me to her family on why she is getting married to me. She has really earned my trust and never regretted engaging her. She is one girl that every man will like to have as wife

In the course of our relationship months back, I noticed there is this guy that call her. I questioned and she said is just a friend. I have told her I am not comfortable with the call. Yes I have listened to the calls and it doesn't sound serious
On 25th Dec I place a call across to her phone and she wasn't picking. She later told me reason why she didn't pick.
While we were together I noticed she didn't pick cos she went out with the same guy I have been complaining about. I got to know via a pic.
She has insisted nothing serious is going on.
I was so angry and I needed to take her phone and check up something. We struggled with the phone and she injured her nails.. She is saying I am a woman beater and I have anger issue.
She started keeping to herself and phone and was bold to tell me that this action of mine has succeeded in killing the feelings she has for me.

She has asked for time to get her mental health back and for close to two weeks now we haven't been flowing well..

I have tried to talk to her so we fix this shit but she said she needs time.

I have decided to give her the time she needs while I focus on something else. Yes, I miss her

I won't lie, is emotional for me and someone is currently trying to fill her vacuum by being all nice. I am getting closer to her, but my heart still yearn for my fiance.

I don't know if I am doing the right thing by being close to another lady. I don't know if I should belivee her that she has lost feelings for me and move on.
I need your advise.

Sorry for the lengthy thread

you are both cheating on each other. You can still walk away. Marriage isn't special.
Re: I Engaged My Girlfriend, Now I Am Thinking Of Calling Off The Engagement by silento(m): 7:00pm On Jan 16, 2021
Hassanmaye:

Will you bang

Nope

1 Like

Re: I Engaged My Girlfriend, Now I Am Thinking Of Calling Off The Engagement by dragunov: 7:04pm On Jan 16, 2021
Serene123:


Her chats, sms, messenger all clean.

Someting happened and her WhatsApp was showing on my phone for months grin without her knowing. I didn't see a single chat with the guy.
Not one.

You know what? She may probably never get back with you. The reason why she is stalling and asking for time off is to see if she can solidify her business with the other dude. She wants to scrutinize the guy very well before she makes the decision of either coming back or dumping you. At this level, you cannot afford to let your emotions take the best turn on you. Be calm and level headed. Take her off your mind but don't give hopes to the other girl trying to fall in. When you're sure you can handle not missing her again you can start getting along with the other nice girl if she is still available. Women are so crafty and that is why you need to be emotionally brutal at times.

1 Like

Re: I Engaged My Girlfriend, Now I Am Thinking Of Calling Off The Engagement by Hassanmaye(m): 7:10pm On Jan 16, 2021
TruthSpeaker:


You have not done anything yet, she might still be outsmarting you by immediately deleting conversations after they are made. She might even reserve the romantic part for just real phone calls instead of bitching with WhatsApp.
Personally I’m convinced the so-called friend is fucking her really hard and probably even better than you do it with her. She might just prefer to settle with you for convenience sake. You failed to profile the dude to know if he is financially doing better than you.
You have already seen a future cause of hypertension, so you better leave her for good or begin to groom a sidechick for the future. Apparently she already has a loaded spare dick.
Hahahahahaha my guy, my pelvic one break

1 Like

Re: I Engaged My Girlfriend, Now I Am Thinking Of Calling Off The Engagement by Dieuetla: 7:10pm On Jan 16, 2021
Serene123:


Confuse

Haven't seen tangible evidence against her and the guy despite hacking her phone and reading all her chats for months.

Just the call that put me off. And the call have continued for months

I am torn between believing her or just calling it off.

Re: I Engaged My Girlfriend, Now I Am Thinking Of Calling Off The Engagement by Dieuetla: 7:23pm On Jan 16, 2021
The lady knows what you are capable of, so you can never see any evidence.
So far they are seeing each other every time they don't need much online.
You can ask her what you are not doing well sexually, this is the most cause of her attitude
quote author=Serene123 post=98090276]

Confuse

Haven't seen tangible evidence against her and the guy despite hacking her phone and reading all her chats for months.

Just the call that put me off. And the call have continued for months

I am torn between believing her or just calling it off.

[/quote]
Re: I Engaged My Girlfriend, Now I Am Thinking Of Calling Off The Engagement by Focusmind: 7:28pm On Jan 16, 2021
Hassanmaye:

No na leave the Mumu abeg

He needs to be rescued now that it is still early. He is on a path of self-destruction. Young men these days should put on their thinking cap.

2 Likes

Re: I Engaged My Girlfriend, Now I Am Thinking Of Calling Off The Engagement by WackyJ1(m): 7:30pm On Jan 16, 2021
Serene123:


I didn't expect less when I came here. Nairalanders will never tell you to work out stuff.

I have digested the whole comments and decided to give her time to think.

The first four comments on your post told you what you needed to know.

But you're hell bent of screwing yourself.

All the evidence is there.

But your attachment to her is making you discard all the evidence that she is cheating on you for the one thing you can hold on to to tell yourself she is not.


You are not experienced.

That is why you are like this.


Those of us who have been cheated on and believed several times until evidence came to wake us up by force,

We have already seen the signs.

1. She has someone she always calls

2. She didn't pick your calls and lied to you about the reason why

3. You found out, she didn't confess.
b. You found out from a picture of the two of them. A picture she was supposed to delete.

4. She fought you for your phone and then turned around to gaslight you by calling you a woman beater.

5. She wasn't remorseful and instead told you she needed space for her mental health. She wasn't even trying to reconcile.

She is somewhere collecting mental health prick.


I have listed 5 things that show she is cheating on you.

You have only one thing to hold on to as the reason for your hope.

I would have ended things at reason number 2.

If you believe she is not cheating and there were no chats with the guy, why are you here?


You want someone to cuddle you with false truths. You should have met your female friends for that.

But guess what.

Even your females friends will tell you she is cheating on you.


Let me tell you one more eventuality.

She will be back.

She will apologise. She will beg. She will soothe your ego and you will take her back.

You will be happy.

You will think you have won.

Just save money for your DNA test along with the money you will be spending on the wedding.

And if the gods are kind to you, you will see proof that she was cheating while claiming to be restoring her mental Health.

10 Likes 2 Shares

Re: I Engaged My Girlfriend, Now I Am Thinking Of Calling Off The Engagement by Hassanmaye(m): 7:31pm On Jan 16, 2021
Mcslize:


Don't you think you already guilt blaming yourself? To me you did nothing wrong. This is a girl you want to marry o. If she had nothing to hide, I see no reason why she was dragging her phone with you till the extent her nails got broken.

Do know that women easily get emotionally carried away even if they know that the secret said guy is an unserious fellow who just want to play with their emotions at the detriment of their serious relationships.

She might be deleting her chats with the said guy. You think she will leave her sensitive chats in her phone when she knows she is planning of getting married soon? She won't want you to find out anything even if she is cheating.

She already knows you are suspecting something, that was why she went on guilt blaming you trying to manipulate you to believe you did wrong by dragging her phone with her and trying to check her phone. That's a tactic ladies usually use when they are cheating to make a guy seems like a monster why they are the victims.

If she had nothing to hide, she wouldn't have been dragging her phone with you.

I will still suggest you look well before you leap. This type of lady won't respect you when you finally marry her. It will become worst.
You are a smart man, have you swallowed the Redpill? You understand the game so well, leave him he will learn
Re: I Engaged My Girlfriend, Now I Am Thinking Of Calling Off The Engagement by Hassanmaye(m): 7:40pm On Jan 16, 2021
360command:
if a girl tell you she needs time, she is with some guy who is interested in her that way she can evaluate who the guy is..

Now that she has taking a break from you, it gives her the opportunity to try someone else and if eventually she is with her new guy and you call , she knows how to act and play upon the whole issue.

The new guy asks, "who is it"? It will be easier for her to say , "some guy disturbing me or my ex...."

At this point, the new guy sees her as genuine and he will fall gaou (foolish)..

I will tell you what I have experienced..

To be a fool for the first time is ok but to be fool twice, then you are a fool for life.
Abeg tell me your experience let me learn

1 Like

Re: I Engaged My Girlfriend, Now I Am Thinking Of Calling Off The Engagement by Mcslize: 7:54pm On Jan 16, 2021
Hassanmaye:

You are a smart man, have you swallowed the Redpill? You understand the game so well, leave him he will learn

Exactly. Humans like learning through the hard way. Quite a number of men notice some of these red flags often times in their partners during dating but overlook them and they later turn out to be unbearable to them after marrying such ladies.

At the end, they end up with divorce cuz the man will have no peace of mind knowing your wife is cheating on you but still unable to accept that simple fact. No matter how one tries to defend such a woman, the man will just be deceiving himself.

Of course, when they meet people outside as couple, they will smile but the man himself knows all is not well in their relationship/marriage.

The right time to correct any infidelity in one's partner is during courtship. If he fails to sit the lady down and give her his terms and conditions regarding that aspect, forget it, such a man has missed it completely.

A woman that cannot respect your terms and conditions regarding infidelity or keeping a male friend as bestie is not ready for marriage.

I don't believe on the "he is just a friend. A lady's best friend should be his partner. Any lady keeping another male friend as bestie is a big joker, let alone consistently chatting and maintaining calls with one particular guy all the time. That's an obvious red flag a wise guy should not overlook especially when marriage is coming into the picture.

Proceeding with such a lady for marriage will be a waste of time and resources.

5 Likes

Re: I Engaged My Girlfriend, Now I Am Thinking Of Calling Off The Engagement by Mcslize: 7:58pm On Jan 16, 2021
Ninisun:



Yes,why must he injure her because of assumptions?, has the tendency of beating her in future.He overreacted cus from what he wrote,its a long distance rship and so should act with evidence.

He didn't beat her. They were dragging the phone and her over cherished long nails got broken.
Re: I Engaged My Girlfriend, Now I Am Thinking Of Calling Off The Engagement by Hassanmaye(m): 8:09pm On Jan 16, 2021
Millenniumlady:
if not you move where No let swear for you poo after she has finish suffer for you time for her to enjoy and have you all alone to her self you want to move.......i blame the said lady if I'm the one i know what i would have done you'll be the one begging me self
What will you have done baby? The easiest way now ladies hook a man down is by using kayanmata, he will not go anywhere he will not even think about it
Re: I Engaged My Girlfriend, Now I Am Thinking Of Calling Off The Engagement by Mummymahdi(f): 8:12pm On Jan 16, 2021
Nawao, such comments are really portraying womanhood in bad or worse light, have things really gone bad do much? Up to this level? May God have mercy, is as if every man in that slide if the v ountry is getting married to a prostitute that he slept with so many times and praying she will b loyal after marriage.


Ladies in serious rship should avoid keeping male friends likewise Men should distance themselves fr on keeping fee male friends, always respects terms and c onditions of each oda and be sure to make some sacrifices for the love, and respects.

1 Like

Re: I Engaged My Girlfriend, Now I Am Thinking Of Calling Off The Engagement by Hassanmaye(m): 8:13pm On Jan 16, 2021
Kaeboy:

Two different WhatsApp can run on a phone at a time but one WhatsApp account can't be logged in, in two places at a time, it's not possible.
How your first statement
Re: I Engaged My Girlfriend, Now I Am Thinking Of Calling Off The Engagement by Hassanmaye(m): 8:14pm On Jan 16, 2021
slumcat:

Guy, you're not wise at all. Na confirm mumu you be walahi.
So she only collects money without getting d!ck from him? Ahahaha. No man can be that foolish.

I don't think you're smart enough to get married in today's Nigeria. If you do, just know that outsiders go straff your wife wella.

Upon all the comments you've read here, you ignored all. You too mumu.

Hauahhahaha I swear when I read this comment I run out
Re: I Engaged My Girlfriend, Now I Am Thinking Of Calling Off The Engagement by Hassanmaye(m): 8:40pm On Jan 16, 2021
slumcat:
List of red flags ignored by the OP.

-You had to hack her whatsapp. This shows that you've had some reasons to suspect her.

-She doesn't pick the guy's calls in your presence and vice versa.

-No trace of chats between her and the suspect. Strictly calls. This alone is highly suspicious.

-She says he is only a friend but goes out on secret dates (even important dates like 25th Dec.) and takes pictures with him.

-She dragged her phone with you to the point of damaging her nails.

-Out of the blue she calls you a woman beater, says she lost her emotions for you and she suddenly needs some time to get her mental health together.

-2 weeks has passed and she hasn't reached out. When you try to fix things she says she needs more time Lol.


For any wise person, any 2 of the above stated red flags would be enough to make one take a break and put on their thinking cap. Worse still, this is someone that has your fvcking ring!.

The truth is that some people are naturally foolish so it is impossible to install wisdom in them. Even if the so called fiancee calls him and told him she was cheating, he would say she was drunk.

You called your so called fiancee on 25th December and she couldn't pick. You later found out that she went out on a date with him. What do you think they were doing when you called? grin. Are you still a child? You no get sense?.

Don't you know that fvcking a lady when her main guy is calling is a huge turn on for guys? Worse still she couldn't pick your calls. Meaning the d!ck is very big so she will likely moan out loud lol grin grin.
See you fulfilling the fantasy of your fellow men grin grin.

Ahahahahaha grin.

Hahahhahha wickedness
Re: I Engaged My Girlfriend, Now I Am Thinking Of Calling Off The Engagement by Aderr: 8:49pm On Jan 16, 2021
Serene123:
Please I will need your constructive opinion on this. Been battling with this thoughts for some time now.

I engaged my girl last year. Reason why I did engage her was because I saw her intent to be with me. I have seen her gave out her cash to help get somethings for our new apartment. She has even used her cash to buy some properties she wants in the house when we get married.
She has stood and defended me to her family on why she is getting married to me. She has really earned my trust and never regretted engaging her. She is one girl that every man will like to have as wife

In the course of our relationship months back, I noticed there is this guy that call her. I questioned and she said is just a friend. I have told her I am not comfortable with the call. Yes I have listened to the calls and it doesn't sound serious
On 25th Dec I place a call across to her phone and she wasn't picking. She later told me reason why she didn't pick.
While we were together I noticed she didn't pick cos she went out with the same guy I have been complaining about. I got to know via a pic.
She has insisted nothing serious is going on.
I was so angry and I needed to take her phone and check up something. We struggled with the phone and she injured her nails.. She is saying I am a woman beater and I have anger issue.
She started keeping to herself and phone and was bold to tell me that this action of mine has succeeded in killing the feelings she has for me.

She has asked for time to get her mental health back and for close to two weeks now we haven't been flowing well..

I have tried to talk to her so we fix this shit but she said she needs time.

I have decided to give her the time she needs while I focus on something else. Yes, I miss her

I won't lie, is emotional for me and someone is currently trying to fill her vacuum by being all nice. I am getting closer to her, but my heart still yearn for my fiance.

I don't know if I am doing the right thing by being close to another lady. I don't know if I should belivee her that she has lost feelings for me and move on.
I need your advise.

Sorry for the lengthy thread

That guy already fvcked her.

1 Like

Re: I Engaged My Girlfriend, Now I Am Thinking Of Calling Off The Engagement by Kaiser94(m): 8:50pm On Jan 16, 2021
She’s cheating on you... Trust me
Re: I Engaged My Girlfriend, Now I Am Thinking Of Calling Off The Engagement by ngwababe(f): 9:37pm On Jan 16, 2021
Serene123:
Please I will need your constructive opinion on this. Been battling with this thoughts for some time now.

I engaged my girl last year. Reason why I did engage her was because I saw her intent to be with me. I have seen her gave out her cash to help get somethings for our new apartment. She has even used her cash to buy some properties she wants in the house when we get married.
She has stood and defended me to her family on why she is getting married to me. She has really earned my trust and never regretted engaging her. She is one girl that every man will like to have as wife

In the course of our relationship months back, I noticed there is this guy that call her. I questioned and she said is just a friend. I have told her I am not comfortable with the call. Yes I have listened to the calls and it doesn't sound serious
On 25th Dec I place a call across to her phone and she wasn't picking. She later told me reason why she didn't pick.
While we were together I noticed she didn't pick cos she went out with the same guy I have been complaining about. I got to know via a pic.
She has insisted nothing serious is going on.
I was so angry and I needed to take her phone and check up something. We struggled with the phone and she injured her nails.. She is saying I am a woman beater and I have anger issue.
She started keeping to herself and phone and was bold to tell me that this action of mine has succeeded in killing the feelings she has for me.

She has asked for time to get her mental health back and for close to two weeks now we haven't been flowing well..

I have tried to talk to her so we fix this shit but she said she needs time.

I have decided to give her the time she needs while I focus on something else. Yes, I miss her

I won't lie, is emotional for me and someone is currently trying to fill her vacuum by being all nice. I am getting closer to her, but my heart still yearn for my fiance.

I don't know if I am doing the right thing by being close to another lady. I don't know if I should belivee her that she has lost feelings for me and move on.
I need your advise.

Sorry for the lengthy thread


But just two weeks, you're already seeing another lady. Na only una wan dey undesirable life pass us

1 Like

Re: I Engaged My Girlfriend, Now I Am Thinking Of Calling Off The Engagement by hollarunji08(m): 9:51pm On Jan 16, 2021
I do say it, this life is beautiful

OP, don't break, as in don't shake, ur so call girlfriend is cheating on u because if she doesn't has any suspicious things on her phone, I don't see any reason for her to be dragging the phone with you...

If ur girlfriend is the type that doesn't pick some particular call when she's with u claiming the person calling is a mad man all or sorts, truth must be said, that's exactly she used to tell other guys when u are calling also.... Wise up

2 Likes

Re: I Engaged My Girlfriend, Now I Am Thinking Of Calling Off The Engagement by Aderr: 9:52pm On Jan 16, 2021
WackyJ1:


Let me tell you one more eventuality.

She will be back.

She will apologise. She will beg. She will soothe your ego and you will take her back.

You will be happy.

You will think you have won.

Just save money for your DNA test along with the money you will be spending on the wedding.

And if the gods are kind to you, you will see proof that she was cheating while claiming to be restoring her mental Health.
You are really experienced! She will come back because the new guy after using her well will dump her and this guy would take her back. grin Then when she knows she has him under her thumb like a button, she will start comparing him unfavorably to the other guy because she knows he is weak. She will torment him for as long as they lived together and never respect him.
Re: I Engaged My Girlfriend, Now I Am Thinking Of Calling Off The Engagement by Nobody: 9:55pm On Jan 16, 2021
Hassanmaye:

How your first statement
there is app that you can use to run duplicate of apps on your phone.

1 Like

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