An Australian backpacker walks into a bar and orders a pint of lager from the barmaid. She recognises his accent and they begin chatting. Over the course of the night they get to know each other quite well. At the end of her shift he asks if she wants to come back to his place for sex. Although she is attracted to him, she declines. He then offers her £200. The waitress is also travelling the world and is short of funds, so she agrees.
The next night he returns and orders another lager. Later in the evening, he offers her another £200 for her services. She is only too happy to agree. This goes on for five nights.
On the sixth night the traveller comes in, orders a lager, and sits in the corner. Hoping to earn more cash in another night of passion, the waitress pulls up a seat, and asks him where's he's from. "Melbourne," the traveller replies. "So am I! What suburb in Melbourne?" she asks. "Glen Iris," he replies. "That's amazing," she says, "so am I! What street?" "Cameo Street, he replies. "This is unbelievable," she says. "What number?" "Number 20." "You are not going to believe this but I'm from number 22 and my parents still live there!" "I know," the man replies. "Your father gave me £1,000 to give to you."

A man's been drinking at a pub all night.
When he stands up to leave, he falls flat on his face.
He tries to stand one more time, but to no avail.
He figures he'll crawl outside and get some fresh air and maybe that will sober him up. Once outside, he stands up and, sure enough, he falls flat on his face.
Finally he decides to crawl the four blocks to his home.
When he arrives at the door, he stands up and falls flat on his face.
He crawls through the door into his bedroom. When he reaches his bed, he tries one more time to stand up.
This time, he manages to pull himself upright but he quickly falls right into bed.
The next morning he awakens to see his wife standing over him, shouting: "So, you've been out drinking again!"
"Why do you say that?" he asks.
"The pub called. You left your wheelchair there again."

Nice one,

u Da man!!!!

@australia style

That will teach those bitches some goddam lesson

yeah thanks to u FORUM/JOKES!
i ve gotten A QUERY!
BEEN LAUGHIN,
AT WORK!!!!

oluyemimi:

yeah thanks to u FORUM/JOKES!
i ve gotten A QUERY!
BEEN LAUGHIN,
AT WORK!!!!

OMG oluyemimi, next time try to send the link to your boss, let him have a glimpse of what nairaland is all 'bout.
I'm sure he'll divide his time btw his work and nairaland.

A colleague of mine actually told me i'm addicted to nairaland, cant do without visiting the site.

am still at work at this time cos of this forum

mimiko:

am still at work at this time because of this forum

Nice really nice.