In Africa and other continents like Asia, bride Price and dowry are the two major conditions for marriage. The parents of the bride collect money and other valuable things from the groom before they release their daughter to him. In a situation where these conditions are not met, some families will not approve or conduct the marriage. They prefer to keep their marriageable daughters than to give them out to men who cannot afford their demands. This practice has always made me wonder. Where does it come from? Definitely, it is not from the Bible because God did not collect anything from Adam before He gave him Eve as a wife. Some people hold the belief that it is a kind of compensation and appreciation to the parents of the lady. Yes, it is good to appreciate but when it now becomes a demand, it is no longer an appreciation but exploitation. And if we are to go by this belief, why must it be one-sided? What do the parents of the man get in return for raising their son to become a responsible man? Because they also deserve appreciation and compensation. Others have argued that what the man gets in return is the woman. Excuse me! This is not fair to the man and the woman. Why should the woman be used as an exchange for money and material things in the name of marriage? She is not a slave. In my research, a group of teenagers from the Asian continent told me that men buy wives when they are ready to get married. And I asked them how. They said that the men pay for pride price. You can see the wrong belief associated with the bride price.

Look! In marriage, the lady is not doing a favour to the man for accepting to marry him and likewise the man. They are both favouring each other. The man is marrying the woman and the woman is marrying the man. No one should feel superior while the other is feeling inferior. So, I wonder why the man and his parents pay the bride price and dowry without getting anything in return than the woman. These two people are marring themselves, it is an agreement between them. If there is no agreement, there will be no marriage. So, why is the man mandated to meet the aforementioned conditions?

Let us consider what the Bible says about the bride price and dowry.

1. Bride price is not a condition for marriage but only as a penalty for rape.

Exodus 22:16-17: "If a man seduces a virgin who is not pledged to be married and sleeps with her, he must pay the bride-price, and she shall be his wife. If her father absolutely refuses to give her to him, he must still pay the bride-price for virgins."

Deuteronomy 22:28-29: "If a man happens to meet a virgin who is not pledged to be married and rapes her and they are discovered, he shall pay her father fifty shekels[a] of silver. He must marry the young woman, for he has violated her. He can never divorce her as long as he lives."

You can still pay the bride price and still be denied the woman to be your wife by her father.
At the same time, if the man has never slept with the woman, there should be no need to pay money on her behalf.

2. There was never ever a place in the Bible where God commanded the bride's parent to present a price. It is the groom's responsibility to bring whatever for the lady he wants to marry.

For example, the marriage between Isaac and Rebekah. There was no monetary exchange or penalty between the two families. Affordable gifts were given to Rebekkah's family by Abraham (but not demanded by Rebekkah's family). Read Genesis 24:52-54.

3. Bride price, according to the Bible, is all about virgins.

Genesis 24:15-16: "Before he had finished praying, Rebekah came out with her jar on her shoulder. She was the daughter of Bethuel son of Milkah, who was the wife of Abraham’s brother Nahor. The woman was very beautiful, a virgin; no man had ever slept with her. She went down to the spring, filled her jar and came up again."

4. Payment of monetary bride price is a tradition and not a direct commandment from God.

In some countries like India, a woman actually pays a dowry for the groom and not the other way round.

5. Presenting list or asking for monetary bride price is a man-made rule. Therefore, it becomes a sin because it's better to obey GOD rather than men.
Acts 5:29: "Peter and the other apostles replied: "We must obey God rather than human beings!"

I see nothing wrong with bride price....the only thing is that the list and the amount should not be too exuberant....yhure not selling yhur daughter

Does the Bible support this point?

Debzempire:
I see nothing wrong with bride price....the only thing is that the list and the amount should not be too exuberant....yhure not selling yhur daughter

Jacob served his in-laws for gud 14 years as payment for 2 of his daughters.. Leave our tradition as Jesus even asked to give to Caesar what belongs to Caesar..

That was slavery and exploitation. In fact, the man deceived Jacob and took advantage of his needs.
If we want to practise the Bible, let's go for it in full and if it is the culture, let's face it. But we cannot combine the two if we must avoid confusion.

Nbotee:
Jacob served his in-laws for gud 14 years as payment for 2 of his daughters.. Leave our tradition as Jesus even asked to give to Caesar what belongs to Caesar..

Timijo:
That was slavery and exploitation. In fact, the man deceived Jacob and took advantage of his needs.
If we want to practise the Bible, let's go for it in full and if it is the culture, let's face it. But we cannot combine the two if we must avoid confusion.

Dats the point exactly.. Jacob didn't see it as an unfair deal neither did his family. They only unfair part of it was being cheated into a second 7yr service for the wife he wanted.

Look at it from this angle...


If there is no bride price from the groom...lots of underage girls will run into a man's house and be getting pregnant just because they found love at first sight....

Lots of our daughters will likely make their own decisions and marry anybody that comes their way..


The bride price have kept many men from being irresponsible. Because you paid for what you valued.


My only concern is that, the bride price should be reduced so that many men at age 30 can marry at ease.


Also, if God was to speak to us in this era, there'd be another version of the Bible to explain things based on this era...

Coz back then, the apostles were solely to stay in the church and they study the scriptures and we're very brilliant and filled with wisdom.

But today, these pastors have different professions. Some are doctors, engineers and lawyers which they get paid from their jobs to the government or as private companies... So there shouldn't be offerings and tithes any more.

You made some relevant points.

yanabasee1:
Look at it from this angle...


If there is no bride price from the groom...lots of underage girls will run into a man's house and be getting pregnant just because they found love at first sight....

Lots of our daughters will likely make their own decisions and marry anybody that comes their way..


The bride price have kept many men from being irresponsible. Because you paid for what you valued.


My only concern is that, the bride price should be reduced so that many men at age 30 can marry at ease.


Also, if God was to speak to us in this era, there'd be another version of the Bible to explain things based on this era...

Coz back then, the apostles were solely to stay in the church and they study the scriptures and we're very brilliant and filled with wisdom.

But today, these pastors have different professions. Some are doctors, engineers and lawyers which they get paid from their jobs to the government or as private companies... So there shouldn't be offerings and tithes any more.