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What Would You Advice In This Situation? - Family - Nairaland

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Please Married Nairalanders, What Would You Do In This Situation? / I Need Advice In Getting A Partner / Ladies What Will You Do In This Situation? (2) (3) (4)

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What Would You Advice In This Situation? by Angelluvy(f): 1:39pm On Feb 09, 2021
A lady who never wanted to have a child, Accordingly to her, she don't want all the pain and stress women go through to nurture a baby.

She aggreed with her partner. And both claim they don't want children, but two yrs into the marriage, she mistakely took in.

Now she want an abortion and the man wouldn't let her. The family is breaking out. She claim the man trick her.

What would you advice here?
Re: What Would You Advice In This Situation? by StPete: 1:44pm On Feb 09, 2021
How can a man trick you when you first have the power to use birth control pills of several kinds if you're so dedicated to not having children.

Also, if she truly didn't want any child, she would've done an abortion without mentioning it to her husband

1 Like

Re: What Would You Advice In This Situation? by madridguy(m): 1:50pm On Feb 09, 2021
She should also trick the man too and get rid of the pregnancy grin

I just hope the lady never get pickin somewhere come dey bobo the guy.

1 Like

Re: What Would You Advice In This Situation? by Angelluvy(f): 1:56pm On Feb 09, 2021
madridguy:
She should also trick the man too and get rid of the pregnancy grin

I just hope the lady never get pickin somewhere come dey bobo the guy.
But the man is aware now.
Re: What Would You Advice In This Situation? by zed7: 1:57pm On Feb 09, 2021
Some people never take responsibility for anything, always blaming others. A woman who doesn't want kids would have done some form of birth control, either temporary or permanent.
As for the man, he should have kept to his agreement. No point raising a child whom one partner doesn't want. There will always be inner resentment.

6 Likes

Re: What Would You Advice In This Situation? by Angelluvy(f): 1:59pm On Feb 09, 2021
StPete:
How can a man trick you when you first have the power to use birth control pills of several kinds if you're so dedicated to not having children.

Also, if she truly didn't want any child, she would've done an abortion without mentioning it to her husband
accordingly to her There were both drunk on two to three occasion. No protection
Re: What Would You Advice In This Situation? by Nobody: 2:06pm On Feb 09, 2021
What's the meaning of this?

1 Like

Re: What Would You Advice In This Situation? by adanny01(m): 2:49pm On Feb 09, 2021
StPete:
How can a man trick you when you first have the power to use birth control pills of several kinds if you're so dedicated to not having children.

Also, if she truly didn't want any child, she would've done an abortion without mentioning it to her husband

She should have done Hysterectomy before meeting her husband.

1 Like

Re: What Would You Advice In This Situation? by DaddyRochie1642: 2:50pm On Feb 09, 2021
Op tell us the truth,.... I know It's YOU that this thing happened to.
Re: What Would You Advice In This Situation? by StPete: 2:51pm On Feb 09, 2021
adanny01:


She should have done Hysterectomy before meeting her husband.

Simple! You can't keep the uterus and pretend not to want children

4 Likes 1 Share

Re: What Would You Advice In This Situation? by Angelluvy(f): 3:31pm On Feb 09, 2021
DaddyRochie1642:
Op tell us the truth,.... I know It's YOU that this thing happened to.
No. Not me.
Re: What Would You Advice In This Situation? by Angelluvy(f): 3:32pm On Feb 09, 2021
adanny01:


She should have done Hysterectomy before meeting her husband.
Yes. You're right. That's past now, the deed has been done.
Re: What Would You Advice In This Situation? by bukatyne(f): 3:44pm On Feb 09, 2021
Angelluvy:
A lady who never wanted to have a child, Accordingly to her, she don't want all the pain and stress women go through to nurture a baby.

She aggreed with her partner. And both claim they don't want children, but two yrs into the marriage, she mistakely took in.

Now she want an abortion and the man wouldn't let her. The family is breaking out. She claim the man trick her.

What would you advice here?

If she really wanted an abortion or no kids, why did she notify him?
Re: What Would You Advice In This Situation? by angelfallz(m): 3:48pm On Feb 09, 2021
What would be would be. She said she doesn't children, God said otherwise. Abortion is murder. so she should start getting her mind set for motherhood.

Angelluvy:
A lady who never wanted to have a child, Accordingly to her, she don't want all the pain and stress women go through to nurture a baby.

She aggreed with her partner. And both claim they don't want children, but two yrs into the marriage, she mistakely took in.

Now she want an abortion and the man wouldn't let her. The family is breaking out. She claim the man trick her.

What would you advice here?
Re: What Would You Advice In This Situation? by adanny01(m): 3:57pm On Feb 09, 2021
Angelluvy:
Yes. You're right. That's past now, the deed has been done.

No, it's not in the past.

She can do the abortion and hysterectomy at once.

If her husband accepts her that way then that's good but if not she should know that he never meant to be the person she thought.

This situation is like an AS genotype couple that know what they are doing but still insist on doing it for love.

It's possible he didn't want to lose her and pretended.

She has to sit down with her husband and talk reality. I feel like she is the one emotionally blackmailing her husband.

There are husband's that have been by their wife's for all their lives when they couldn't bare children, but its not that they don't want children.

It's naive of her to think he will not want kids if the opportunity avails itself.

I have seen guys who love a girl that doesn't want sex till wedding day, but the guy gets his sex elsewhere and still love the one he is not having sex with. The girl who is not having sex is delusional about her status.

1 Like

Re: What Would You Advice In This Situation? by mosdii(m): 4:08pm On Feb 09, 2021
Nigerian Girls Are Useless...All Of Them
Re: What Would You Advice In This Situation? by Klass99(f): 4:25pm On Feb 09, 2021
smiley

2 Likes

Re: What Would You Advice In This Situation? by Liposure: 4:47pm On Feb 09, 2021
There's no excuse for carelessness. She knew what was at stake when she decided to mate without PPE. Even at that no pills after copulation. This wasn't a mistake. Assuming she was forced perhaps...She should just go ahead and have the baby, afterall she's not the first to get pregnant.
Re: What Would You Advice In This Situation? by apatheticme(f): 4:55pm On Feb 09, 2021
As long as she's married, she should have the child!

When she becomes a mother, her mindset will change!

Motherhood is one of the most beautiful things a woman can experience in life! Though stressful, but seeing my kids faces, their innocent giggles, especially my daughter brings smiles to my face regardless of any stress I'm under!
Re: What Would You Advice In This Situation? by madridguy(m): 5:02pm On Feb 09, 2021
Is the man following her up and down?

Angelluvy:
But the man is aware now.
Re: What Would You Advice In This Situation? by Angelluvy(f): 6:09pm On Feb 09, 2021
mosdii:
Nigerian Girls Are Useless...All Of Them
Why do you want to drag your innocent mother into an online insult? What's your problem spoit child?
Re: What Would You Advice In This Situation? by Angelluvy(f): 6:15pm On Feb 09, 2021
Klass99:


Meaning no offence but this woman is sounding dumber and dumber, with more details you reveal, and if it's you my apologies.

I know for certain I don't want children and I don't plan to have any, so I am very deliberate, intentional and meticulous about it not happening.

You don't make mistakes with this sort of thing, she has been careless in different ways. Getting drunk then romping without before or after precautions, is just one of the ways she has been careless. I'm just saying not trying to rain on her parade.

If she's legally married let her have the baby, they say it changes our minds about not wanting kids, hopefully that may happen for her, but if it doesn't she still needs to be thoughtful and considerate of her spouse and the foetus. Her desire cannot at this time trump his or the foetus who didn't ask to be conceived.

Whatever she decides pls let her not terminate the foetus, it is not just mere blood forming in her womb, it is a whole and complete person taking shape inside of her already. And please tell her to move on from this without being this careless in future, if she's truly serious about not wanting kids.

It's a friend I'm advising, I've really exhausted all my advice that's why I brought it here for bigger mind.

She's insisting on divorce, but the man said no until their baby is born.
Re: What Would You Advice In This Situation? by Angelluvy(f): 6:17pm On Feb 09, 2021
madridguy:
Is the man following her up and down?

Since last week, she has been on house arrest. The man wouldn't let her out and promise to kill her if she have Miss carriage.
Re: What Would You Advice In This Situation? by Lucrativress(f): 6:23pm On Feb 09, 2021
Angelluvy:
A lady who never wanted to have a child, Accordingly to her, she don't want all the pain and stress women go through to nurture a baby.

She aggreed with her partner. And both claim they don't want children, but two yrs into the marriage, she mistakely took in.

Now she want an abortion and the man wouldn't let her. The family is breaking out. She claim the man trick her.

What would you advice here?
She didn't freeze her ovaries or take out her eggs,unconsciously she rekindled her Husband's interest in having kid's
Compromise,just compromise and have the Baby if you still want to keep the Marriage
Taking in already got his interest, you might just like the feeling of giving birth after giving birth
Marriage is about compromising

2 Likes

Re: What Would You Advice In This Situation? by Nsiehi: 6:55pm On Feb 09, 2021
She can give birth to the baby and put up for adoption.

1 Like

Re: What Would You Advice In This Situation? by Klass99(f): 11:53pm On Feb 09, 2021
smiley

1 Like

Re: What Would You Advice In This Situation? by Nobody: 4:44am On Feb 10, 2021
On one hand, he should've stuck to their agreement prior to the marriage, as it's an oral contract. On the other hand, people's life decisions can change over time and this may be the case with him, while she's an exception. He could end up going outside the marriage to have a child due to her refusal, so if she wants to continue the marriage or at least amicably, she should compromise and have this one baby, then tie her tubes. However, for her to want an abortion over this means her decision to remain childfree is firm and I'm not one to judge a woman over her personal decisions or what she wants to do with her body.

3 Likes

Re: What Would You Advice In This Situation? by Richy4(m): 7:39am On Feb 10, 2021
adanny01:


She should have done Hysterectomy before meeting her husband.

It's like you know this kind of thing too muchooo lipsrsealed....I have to google just to know what that word is..
Re: What Would You Advice In This Situation? by extol1(m): 8:23pm On Feb 14, 2021
op, the foundation of the marriage was based on pure lies. to an African man, child or children are his pride. a man with so much wealth without a child is not value in the society. and I want to believe that the lady know that the man lied to her by agreeing to her terms.
for me, she can give birth to the baby and take the baby to an orphanage home
Re: What Would You Advice In This Situation? by extol1(m): 8:28pm On Feb 14, 2021
Angelluvy:
A lady who never wanted to have a child, Accordingly to her, she don't want all the pain and stress women go through to nurture a baby.

She aggreed with her partner. And both claim they don't want children, but two yrs into the marriage, she mistakely took in.

Now she want an abortion and the man wouldn't let her. The family is breaking out. She claim the man trick her.

What would you advice here?
you means we have this kind of people in this Nigeria. so as a married couple they will be using condom whenever they want to have sex.
Re: What Would You Advice In This Situation? by BaeMercy(f): 8:53pm On Feb 14, 2021
Angelluvy:
A lady who never wanted to have a child, Accordingly to her, she don't want all the pain and stress women go through to nurture a baby.

She aggreed with her partner. And both claim they don't want children, but two yrs into the marriage, she mistakely took in.

Now she want an abortion and the man wouldn't let her. The family is breaking out. She claim the man trick her.

What would you advice here?
why did she marry if she doesn't want kids when she knows she can mistakenly take in... some women sha
Re: What Would You Advice In This Situation? by Nobody: 8:54pm On Feb 14, 2021
extol1:
op, the foundation of the marriage was based on pure lies. to an African man, child or children are his pride. a man with so much wealth without a child is not value in the society. and I want to believe that the lady know that the man lied to her by agreeing to her terms.
for me, she can give birth to the baby and take the baby to an orphanage home

While they had an agreement pre-marriage and it's not right for him to suddenly change his mind, I don't think he lied to her. Had he lied about not wanting kids, he probably would've tried to get her pregnant within the first year of marriage, but for him tor remain childless for two years, it may be

1) a change of mind on his part - he now desires to have kids
2) pressure from family to have kids

I doubt he tricked her to get pregnant either. Since she's so adamant on not wanting kids, she should've taken the necessary precautions for herself.

1 Like

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