I write this, sequel to a thread I read here a few days ago (precisely on Valentine's Day), on why people should preserve themselves and remain virgins till marriage.
After seeing the thread, my mind swayed right directly to the sayings of some men on this forum, on the opinion that marriage only favours the woman and not the man; then I tried connecting the dots.

That same day, my mind led me back to around a year ago while I was still serving. I rented a self-con, next to a young bar attendant of around 28 years, let's call him Kay. It was a twin flat, so we shared the same veranda and our rooms were very close.
This guy had a very young, charming, moderately rich, perfectly shaped, extremely slender, dark girl staying with him. Let's call her Joy. I'd later discover she was in 200L studying nursing but couldn't go home during the Corona, so, lied to her parents she was held in the school hostel instead.

In all honesty, I do not know her age, but my instinct told me she couldn't be more than 19. I even tried spying on her facebook account but couldn't get her exact age.

Guys, not to bore you, Kay and this girl, Joy, have sex more than they talk to each other. There is no day, no single day, I will not hear her whimpers in my room. It is not exaggeration if I say that no day passed without them having sex. They copulate so much that, at a time, the girl's walking posture changed. Her legs were not as free and slender as they used to.

Not just the sex. This girl spends anyhow for Kay. I got to later discover that she's the only child of her rich parents, so they never allow her lack anything.

In fact, I also learnt that the iPhone this guy, Kay, uses was bought by Joy as a birthday gift for him.
This guy would copulate roughly with the girl before leaving for work in the morning and roughly again when he comes back at night. Even midnights weren't left out as I occasionally would need to put up my speaker's volume just to distract me. And surprisingly again, this girl must cook for him before he comes back, from her own money.

Another shocking thing about this was, I have witnessed on more than 4 occasions, whenever we sit outside to gist, especially on weekends, this guy would say it openly that he cannot marry her, and that she should go and cook the rubbish she was making for him in her husband's house. That only her future husband deserves salty rice, hard beef, blah blah blah and not him. The girl too would just sit there, laughing sheepily.

I have also witnessed on one or two occasions, where this guy would throw this girl out at night on frivolous grounds. On one night after he had thrown her out and I had begged that he please allow her in, I heard their faint chatters on how that he wasn't enjoying her again, and that he needed something tighter, hence suggested sodomy. (I lie you not.)

At a time, I couldn't stand the excruciating agony Kay was putting this girl through that I wanted to sit her down and talk some sense into her, but it'd have been a waste. This girl is completely in love, or shall I say, foolishly in love, with him.

This act continued so long, until I finished my service there, packed my things and left the state.

My good people of nairaland, I can categorically say that this guy, Kay, milked this girl financially and sexually. Trust me, that girl has no sexual sweetness anymore. I just feel sorry for whoever her future husband will be. You know after you bite into a sugar cane and then spit it out after squeezing and enjoying its sweetness? That's what Kay has done to that girl.

....

Now, where's the connection?

Imagine if a girl like that who, at her tender age, has wasted her sexual prowess gets picked by a God fearing virgin man of God and is given an exorbitant bride price to pay?

Back in school, I have witnessed girls get laid with as low as Sharwarma and Vanilla ice cream.
Imagine a lady loses her virginity for ordinary meat pie and Bigi Chapman, and when the time for marriage comes, the prospective suitor is given over 200, 000 to pay as bride price.

Well, as for me. I have never messed anyone's child up.

And God is my witness, if she isn't a virgin, I will never drop a naira as pride price. Even a kobo like this, I will not pay.
The only reason I will marry a non virgin is if she'll pay my bride price, then I can reconsider.

In all honestly, I can say that marriage favours only the woman and not the man.

This life no balance

DONFRANSKID:
This life no balance

E no balance at all, my brother.

She is a female simp if there is any definition of such

lefulefu:
She is a female simp if there is any definition of such

Trust me, hers is worse than a simp's. I just feel it is immaturity and youthful gra gra.

Sammmyyyy:


Trust me, hers is worse than a simp's. I just feel it is immaturity and youthful gra gra.

she go overgrow such nativity but she might end up as a bitter young woman from d experience

lefulefu:
she go overgrow such nativity but she might end up as a bitter young woman from d experience

You're right bro. That's one of the reasons for the growing number of bitter misandrists parading themselves as feminists in our society today.

So sad.

Wyry:
Nigerian girls are useless.

Not my handwriting ooo

OP

Permit me to say you have a skewed view on why some people remain virgins and why some are not.

Let me tell you a story, there was a lady I was told whom her dad deflowered at the age of ten and did so for close to 15 years, this event left her sexually scared, and ready to go down with the guy she's in a relationship with, she couldn't even take good decisions on who to settle down with.

You see sometimes you don't throw stones without finding out the underlaying cause, I use to hold your view but that changed when I interacted with some very wounded ladies and guys alike. There is more to life that being a virgin or not, however we must not and never condone careless living.

That guy Kay is a Real Nigga and I love him just already

And what should we derive from this? I don't understand

Bola146:
And what should we derive from this? I don't understand

In summary broda is saying that in Nigeria, bride/pride price should be paid for only virgins. Female non virgins should pay dowry to male virgins

Yusufisraelj:
OP

Permit me to say you have a skewed view on why some people remain virgins and why some are not.

Let me tell you a story, there was a lady I was told whom her dad deflowered at the age of ten and did so for close to 15 years, this event left her sexually scared, and ready to go down with the guy she's in a relationship with, she couldn't even take good decisions on who to settle down with.

You see sometimes you don't throw stones without finding out the underlaying cause, I use to hold your view but that changed when I interacted with some very wounded ladies and guys alike. There is more to life that being a virgin or not, however we must not and never condone careless living.

You have a valid point, bro and thank you for your wise submission.
Of course I have lived life enough to know there's more to life than just virginity.
What I harmlessly hope to achieve with recounting that experience is to aggrandize the fact that the society has placed so much emphasis on the issue of the man paying a bride price, without considering the prognosis, intricacies and whether the bride price is really worth paying.

heendrix:
That guy Kay is a Real Nigga and I love him just already

God dey.

Bola146:
And what should we derive from this? I don't understand

The post is for smart people, actually.

heendrix:
That guy Kay is a Real Nigga and I love him just already

May karma catch up with him wherever he is. How can someone be that heartless na??....

KidDarkness:

In summary broda is saying that in Nigeria, bride/pride price should be paid for only virgins. Female non virgins should pay dowry to male virgins

It is a transparent innuendo... It is opened to many interpretations.

Maryjane001:

May karma catch up with him wherever he is. How can someone be that heartless na??....

That's just it. Heartlessness. But trust me, the girl wouldn't have listened too even if someone had called her to speak sense into her.

That infatuation was to the extreme.

Sammmyyyy:


You have a valid point, bro and thank you for your wise submission.
Of course I have lived life enough to know there's more to life than just virginity.
What I harmlessly hope to achieve with recounting that experience is to aggrandize the fact that the society has placed so much emphasis on the issue of the man paying a bride price, without considering the prognosis, intricacies and whether the bride price is really worth paying.

I love your submission and use of words.

Yea this a great challenge in the country infact this has affected me directly at one time, but you see parents don't have a perogative of how thier daughters live outside thier homes and sincerely it's not on them but on the lady to be person of integrity, virtuous and insightful. I hope such comes your way .

Yusufisraelj:


I love your submission and use of words.

Yea this a great challenge in the country infact this has affected me directly at one time, but you see parents don't have a perogative of how thier daughters live outside thier homes and sincerely it's not on them but on the lady to be person of integrity, virtuous and insightful. I hope such comes your way .

Amin Amin. Thanks bro, may the bests come our ways.

Guy, go to campuses, among corpers among young people allowed to cohabit..the only thing they want to do all day and all night and that is on their minds is sex.
This your story is nothing new. I can give you 101 stories like this.

Parents need to be on top of their games. Some youths say how can your parents come to campus or visit you? What rubbish. Parents have the right so long as they pay the Bill's and fees. Many parents live in self denial. Their girls are saints their boys are good when in reality they are almost prostitutes or armed robbers

Na wa oo!
As tall as I am, I'm short of words.

Parents need to make sure their children are well groomed with certain cultures instilled in them before they are allowed to leave for higher institution. The ones who gain admission at early ages should be put in care of campus fellowship leaders and also given close marking. Na wetin save people like me be that... Our life for no get meaning today.

blackboy:
Guy, go to campuses, among corpers among young people allowed to cohabit..the only thing they want to do all day and all night and that is on their minds is sex.
This your story is nothing new. I can give you 101 stories like this.

Parents need to be on top of their games. Some youths say how can your parents come to campus or visit you? What rubbish. Parents have the right so long as they pay the Bill's and fees. Many parents live in self denial. Their girls are saints their boys are good when in reality they are almost prostitutes or armed robbers

God bless you bro. This is so on point. This is one of the reasons I maintain that in all of these, parents have a very big role to play. Teenagers of these days, especially those ones between the ages of 16 - 20 have a quite high propensity of turning wayward and recalcitrant.

Ki olórun fún wa ló mo tó máa gbóran... May the Almighty gift us children who listen.

anochuko01:
Na wa oo!
As tall as I am, I'm short of words.

Parents need to make sure their children are well groomed with certain cultures instilled in them before they are allowed to leave for higher institution. The ones who gain admission at early ages should be put in care of campus fellowship leaders and also given close marking. Na wetin save people like me be that... Our life for no get meaning today.

This is pure fact. The home is the closest social group, obviously. If a child will turn wayward or not, it starts all in the home.

Maryjane001:

May karma catch up with him wherever he is. How can someone be that heartless na??....

This is just 0.00001% compared to what Pvssy holders do to guys so News like this gives me so much joy and encourage more guys to wake up

Oga oo

Things deh happen

heendrix:


This is just 0.00001% compared to what Pvssy holders do to guys so News like this gives me so much joy and encourage more guys to wake up

Actually, on the contrary, every one is responsible for each of their own actions..no matter the gender involved..each must take responsibility of their actions

Sammmyyyy:


Trust me, hers is worse than a simp's. I just feel it is immaturity and youthful gra gra.

Exactly! It's just pure immaturity.

Nawa


But op, indirectly,are you telling us you're a virgin??




I'm juss asking ooo, dazall.




Iz jus a kwesion ooo

where do some people keep there conciousness, self esteem, self value and and empathy. Kai, the dude no try at all.