[size=14pt]My husband abandoned us and I’m confused[/size]
Dear Bunmi Wednesday, April 13, 2011


By Bunmi Sofola


Dear Bunmi,



I've just been abandoned by my husband of 22 years. He got a better job early last year but in another city. As a result, he rented a one-room apartment and I stayed in the family house with our two daughters. At first, he came home every last weekend of the month until he didn't bother to visit at all.

It was then I discovered he'd taken most of his good clothes. I was so shocked that I managed to talk to his boss at work. He'd lied that he lost his mobile and wasn't keen on getting another one. It was his boss who gave me the number of his new mobile.

Suspecting he was up to no good, I called him from a business center and he was annoyed I was given his number. He said he didn't get in touch because he was fed up with our constant quarrels. When I asked him when he was to be expected, he said I should forget the marriage. One of our girls is doing her youth service and the other one is training as a nurse.

I later found out he was staying with a woman who was expecting his baby. I'm really bewildered by all this.

He's nearing 50 and I am 46. I honestly don't know what's come over him. He used to be a caring father and I thought we'd settled into a comfortable marriage. He's certainly changed and I haven't set eyes on him since the day he callously ended our marriage on the phone. He doesn't want me phoning or texting him and he said we're welcome to the family house.

I don't know where I went wrong. I did everything for him and it's obvious this new woman must have done more. I'm still in love with him and it is now doubtful that he ever loved me. I gave him 22 years of my life, and I feel I've been slapped in the face. Do you think he's having a midlife crisis, or has he gone off the rail? His father treated his mother the same way, so maybe it runs in the family.

Dayo

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