The cost of repairs was going to be deducted from his salary on a monthly basis, but the fellow unceremoniously stopped coming to work after a month. He was later spotted in traffic selling air fresheners.

Blaise was put on probation, and the MD selected semo and egusi soup for his first food test.

The egusi also tasted...funny...

Ishilove:

UyaiIncomparabl:
I feel highly insulted for having to drag my honourable people of Akwa Ibom into this.

I won't forgive you.

Kondomatic:


Baba cannot can.


There was a time Kogi state government gave massive loans to teachers in some parts of the state.
I think it was around 2013/2014.

A lot of teachers took the loan but when the government started deducting the loans from their salary as agreed and they saw what's left, many resigned

UyaiIncomparabl:
I feel highly insulted and attacked for having to drag my honourable people of Akwa Ibom into this.

I won't forgive you.

mariahAngel:


Do you get notifications when Akwa Ibom is mentioned?

Nwaanyi kalaba

JidennaJason:


I feel same way too, but I remember how my Israeli boss do complain of his chef (Umoh) undying love for Roots and refined strong gin

mariahAngel:


Do you get notifications when Akwa Ibom is mentioned?

Nwaanyi kalaba

UyaiIncomparabl:


Make I nor talk.

That's Chef Umoh's business o.

All I have to say is "we are the best". Ishilove, take your time.

pocohantas:


This is a very serious offense in reality. Calling an AkwaIbom person, “Calabar”. Even some people from other ethnic groups in Cross River would take offense when you lump all of them as Calabar. My friend takes it very personally o. She would tell you, “I am NOT from Calabar”.

UyaiIncomparabl:




I nor be Calabar. You hear, Aunty Maria?

pocohantas:


Nigerians are just impossible. At my former place of work, there was a worrying trend on loans too. Theirs was even worse because they were japa’ng. The organization had to go the extra mile to curtail it.

pocohantas:


This is a very serious offense in reality. Calling an AkwaIbom person, “Calabar”. Even some people from other ethnic groups in Cross River would take offense when you lump all of them as Calabar. My friend takes it very personally o. She would tell you, “I am NOT from Calabar”.

JidennaJason:



Ishi coconut head, just see the way you destroyed my Akwa Ibom brothers...

That Ogogoro is the biggest motivation to an average chef from that side.

MejiLoyon:
When you tell someone safe journey no be only by motor accidents. So many factors dey including this shit factor.

At least you see bank enter

My own worse
And it happened to Mejiloyon when I was in 200 level. Mom has always warned me from eating outside because I react to seasonings especially those white ones like Vedan and Ajinomoto. One Saturday near exam period owu don blow men we go chow party chow. I won't say the meal so I won't seem tribalistic. But on our way back na that time I know say khaki no be leather. My belle first do tiiiiiuuuuunnnnn with one small mess . I overlook am. I just see my guy deji just start to run. Just like that he start to run. Wetin dey worry this one? Before you know I don dey sweat. All my body sweat full am. God so good I don pass great Hall. The way I take enter bush. You think I'm relieved Abi. Nah. You see the anus has a way of loosening when you don dey near toilet. Before I say make I loose belt shit don pour. All my legs all my boxers everywhere shit. Time was 3 pm.
Fellow Nigerians. I clean my body ,throway the jeans come turn Tarzan. I didn't leave that bush till 12 or 1 am. Yes I trekked butt naked to the hostel. It was my guy wande that left a three quarter for me at the carpark. Wande if you're here you know who I am finally. 9 hours in the bush. Dodging people,doing nothing,got bitten by insects and stuffs. It was horrible. Na so we shit am..I mean see am

mariahAngel:


I'm still waiting for the rest of the story...

Ishilove:
We occasionally have need for a chef in our company, especially when the MD is around in the country. He is based in the UK, you see, and is only around about 3 to 4 times a year. During those times, the MD, who is a foodie, hosts a lot of parties and attends even more on an owambe level.

The last chef we had was fired for being a drunk, getting into a drunken fight with a fellow drunk and stabbing him on the bank when he turned to flee the brawl. Akwa Ibomites are known for their top notch culinary skills, however all the chefs we have hired from that area have an inordinate love for ogogoro. There was another who took one of the company vehicles, a 2006 Toyota Camry for a drunken jolly joy ride and crashed the vehicle somewhere around Berger. The cost of repairs was going to be deducted from his salary on a monthly basis, but the fellow unceremoniously stopped coming to work after a month. He was later spotted in traffic selling air fresheners.

All these unsavoury experiences with Akwa Ibomites made the company venture outside the shores of the country to far away Benin republic where a citizen of that country, a wiry, baby voiced and camel faced young man by the name of Blaise was hired to replace the lately sacked chef. He came highly recommended and we all had high hopes that we would no longer have embarrassing episodes caused by the regular intoxication of our Nigerian compatriots.

Blaise was put on probation, and the MD selected semo and egusi soup for his first food test.

By 'gingerly', I mean catwalk. Hold your breath, squeeze your ass tight and roll your hips. And walk