Theagnosticdude:
I've been a silent member of this forum for a while. I decided to post this because what I'm passing through right now is severely eating me up.
Before I start, I would like to say a few things about myself. I'm a young man in his mid twenties. I have not been in a lot of relationships/dating. In fact, the only relationship I have been into was the one I had about six years ago, shortly after leaving secondary school. Since I broke up with the girl, I have not been in any worthwhile relationship until about three years when I met this girl in the university. We are in the same department and the same class. I loved the girl and I'm sure she liked me but we didn't date because I wasn't ready for relationship. We were friends and we rolled very well.
At some point, I couldn't hold back the feelings I had for her. So, a few days ago, I asked her for a date which she rejected to my greatest surprise
In her response, she told me that that she sees me as a friend and cautioned me not to ruin the friendship. This response from her broke me down and I die each time I go back to read the chart.
I love her but I've decided to move on. However, the problem now is that I can't move on. I've been trying to get her off my mind for the past few days but can't. I can't even concentrate in the class again neither can I read and I have exams in less than two weeks.
All I need from you is some pieces of advice on how to come out of this mess. You may call me a simp or you may say she has put me in her friendzone but all that insults do not matter to me right now. Your mature response is all I need right now.
Thanks

ChiefSosa:
This is the time for you to love YOURSELF MORE. You're too focused on her and what she's got going on. Focus more on yourself and what makes you happy. There's more to life than being too infatuated with someone. You don't have to hate her, just put more effort into other things that interest you. You're losing focus on your studies, I hope you realize she's not losing focus on hers? E go shock u wen she go finish school, go marry born pikin and u go still dey struggle for school. No dey use woman mata dey bother yourself o, cause woman fit easily sort herself out for this life. Na man really get long way to go. Your egungun is not careful, you're allowing him to cross express for someone that won't cross gutter for you. Just do you bro and if this advice doesn't work, na e be say we go carry you enter ashawo quarter be that, talk to some Nlanders, dem go arrange location for you.

bepositive11:
First of all, ignore the comments telling you to sleep with girls left and right. Don't do that. You would lose sensitivity. Sex would lose its meaning to you. Men who do that can't even bond through sex anymore. I feel sorry for them.

What you should do now is channel all the love you had for her to yourself. It will take time, so take it one step at a time and be patient with yourself. Take care of yourself mentally, physically, and emotionally. Look for new opportunities of growth. Learn a new skill. These are just a few examples. Make your own list.

And don't try to force yourself to stop thinking about her. That'll only make you think about her more. When she comes up in your mind, let it pass and turn focus your mind on something else.

And for now, force yourself to study. Don't fail your exams because of her. It's really not worth the price you'll have to pay in the long run.

Another thing to remember is that if you truly loved her, you're never going to stop loving her, so just accept it and continue on with your life.

I will tell you my story. The exact same thing happened to me two years ago. One of the most painful experiences I've ever had in my life. Today, I'm doing really well. I have a great career going on for me. I'm just waiting for the pandemic to be over so that I can start traveling the world. They have also started showing interest in me, but I'm not interested anymore. They will always have a special place in my heart though.

Be positive. Turn this painful experience into a learning experience, into a growth experience. Make it change you for the better and learn from your mistakes.

FreeSpirited:
Mid 20s...that shd be around 25 I guess. Go and learn how to toast babes...start toasting gals...randomly.
You don't have confidence. You are locked to a gal in an environment where thousands of gals are available. Lol. You are blinded with the delusion of scarcity of girls in the midst of plenty...
U have a lot to learn, unlearn and leave ur comfort zone.. otherwise, u will hate ursef cos gals will fuccking deal with ur self image and manhood. Nothing else to tell u.

lilvicky68:
You have to choose between love and your studies.. concentrate on yourself..Las last na lust dey do you no be love..

Theagnosticdude:

I know I have a lot to learn in the areas you mentioned... toasting, dating, confidence building etc. But I'm not a complete dumbass when it comes to this areas either. I know how to go out for the girls that I like. After my first relationship, I've been trying as much as I can to refrain from further relationships just to avoid heartbreaks. But I don't know how I couldn't hold back my feelings for this particular girl.
Well, all that I want right about now is not going out to find another date but to get her off mind completely.
Thanks though

Theagnosticdude:

Thank you for your thought response

Theagnosticdude:
I've been a silent member of this forum for a while. I decided to post this because what I'm passing through right now is severely eating me up.
Before I start, I would like to say a few things about myself. I'm a young man in his mid twenties. I have not been in a lot of relationships/dating. In fact, the only relationship I have been into was the one I had about six years ago, shortly after leaving secondary school. Since I broke up with the girl, I have not been in any worthwhile relationship until about three years when I met this girl in the university. We are in the same department and the same class. I loved the girl and I'm sure she liked me but we didn't date because I wasn't ready for relationship. We were friends and we rolled very well.
At some point, I couldn't hold back the feelings I had for her. So, a few days ago, I asked her for a date which she rejected to my greatest surprise
In her response, she told me that that she sees me as a friend and cautioned me not to ruin the friendship. This response from her broke me down and I die each time I go back to read the chart.
I love her but I've decided to move on. However, the problem now is that I can't move on. I've been trying to get her off my mind for the past few days but can't. I can't even concentrate in the class again neither can I read and I have exams in less than two weeks.
All I need from you is some pieces of advice on how to come out of this mess. You may call me a simp or you may say she has put me in her friendzone but all that insults do not matter to me right now. Your mature response is all I need right now.
Thanks

Viridis:
Meet her face to face tell her strongly that don't want you to be ordinary friends. If she still refuse, avoid her. I tell you this, there is no way you will love a girl that you cannot move on, highest it will take time. Am telling you from first hand experience.

If you have friends, spend time with them it will help you heal quicker

Theagnosticdude:
I've been a silent member of this forum for a while. I decided to post this because what I'm passing through right now is severely eating me up.
Before I start, I would like to say a few things about myself. I'm a young man in his mid twenties. I have not been in a lot of relationships/dating. In fact, the only relationship I have been into was the one I had about six years ago, shortly after leaving secondary school. Since I broke up with the girl, I have not been in any worthwhile relationship until about three years when I met this girl in the university. We are in the same department and the same class. I loved the girl and I'm sure she liked me but we didn't date because I wasn't ready for relationship. We were friends and we rolled very well.
At some point, I couldn't hold back the feelings I had for her. So, a few days ago, I asked her for a date which she rejected to my greatest surprise
In her response, she told me that that she sees me as a friend and cautioned me not to ruin the friendship. This response from her broke me down and I die each time I go back to read the chart.
I love her but I've decided to move on. However, the problem now is that I can't move on. I've been trying to get her off my mind for the past few days but can't. I can't even concentrate in the class again neither can I read and I have exams in less than two weeks.
All I need from you is some pieces of advice on how to come out of this mess. You may call me a simp or you may say she has put me in her friendzone but all that insults do not matter to me right now. Your mature response is all I need right now.
Thanks