Rubbiish:

Think about what?
Are u suggesting he shouldn't help his mum? I never knew u were this wicked!

you’re right . But how long should he keep up helping his family when he’s yet to find his feet??

Omo it’s not easy ehn .., meself don Dey think of running away

Lush100:
Let me tell a story.

I got to a very close friends house.
A pastors wife was very ill.
We were asked to take her to a specific hospital in another location.
The place was described to us but we didn't know the place before.
While me and my friend were driving, the woman was in severe pains which made her scream at the pain.
My friend offered no apology throughout the journey and he went taking a roundabout over the circle for about 3 times because he was making call. I think that roundabout was crucial to getting the location, he didn't want to miss it.
We finally got to the hospital and we took the woman in. Told her sorry.

He says his focus was to get to that hospital and that apology thing will distract him. He says she was to endure that pain till he got there.

I learned and I hope I have passed a message to you dear op and others.

NB. He was 3 years younger than me.

ten years ago,a man gave me same advise. But it's easier when you're not the person on the wheel

You sink or swim.
Many in worst condition like you have make it (and yes, many perished).

He's trained himself in school.

I never said he shouldn't help his parents/family your emotions have beclouded you.

I said he should stop telling them everything about himself.

CharisEleos:


Keep quiet!
He should man up and abandon his family?

How can you say such about the parents that trained him in school?


Did the parents die when they were starving to send him to school?

In your mind now, you're smart.. mtchew!

Divoc19:
He's trained himself in school.

I never said he shouldn't help his parents/family your emotions have beclouded you.

I said he should stop telling them everything about himself.

Lol.. emotions beclouded.me? For telling you to desist from advising someone wrongly? Very shallow!

He trained himself in tertiary, fine. Who trained from primary up to secondary level? Always think before you talk.

So, if he doesn't disclose anything about himself to his family, is it you he should now disclose it to like he has done here on nairaland?

I still maintain my stance. Stop causing discord in a family.

See your life outside?
Did I say he shouldn't disclose Anything? I said Everything

Calm down bro.
I came in peace

Don't mention me again.

CharisEleos:


Lol.. emotions beclouded.me? For telling you to desist from advising someone wrongly? Very shallow!

He trained himself in tertiary, fine. Who trained from primary up to secondary level? Always think before you talk.

So, if [b]he doesn't disclose anything about himself to his family, [/b]is it you he should now disclose it to like he has done here on nairaland?

I still maintain my stance. Stop causing discord in a family.

You better tough up bro!, someone asked if you're dead will they call you!?... She's 100% stating reality, distance yourself from demanding people and achieve something for yourself!, cus if you are worthless or even dead none of them will care!, na person wey belleful dey give person food wey im remain. Really at the end it's you and you alone that matters most, it's an unfair world we live in!

Caleycashh:
You better tough up bro!, someone asked if you're dead will they call you!?... She's 100% stating reality, distance yourself from demanding people and achieve something for yourself!, cus if you are worthless or even dead none of them will care!, na person wey belleful dey give person food wey im remain. Really at the end it's you and you alone that matters most, it's an unfair world we live in!

This is my mindset

Hmm Nigeria is tough my brother just stay positive, the truth is that your pay is too small to cather for such responsibilities, I will suggest you explain things to your siblings and mother, things have changed money has lost value, people who cather for huge responsibilities has more than one source of income to stay afloat, tell them to bear with you for sometime by looking for other way to survive so that you can save and diversitfy your income, all hands should be on desk to pull the family out of poverty, explain a very polite way to them that this is having negative effect on your mental health, let them know you are not telling them to stay off but they should help you in anyway they can, it could be by lessing their demand for money. Just handle it amicably we all know family is all we have but they shouldn't be the one that will kill us

jimmychang:



This is my mindset

that's how it is bro!... As we come alone naso we go leave alone oo, even person mother no go follow m go talk more of others!

Divoc19:
He's trained himself in school.

I never said he shouldn't help his parents/family your emotions have beclouded you.

I said he should stop telling them everything about himself.

Don't mind that guy, na their type they spoil family and are highly manipulative, them no go hussle but wan chop because una relate!... As Naija be so na only my Mom I send and the sending na when I dey alright!... I no follow anybody come this life and I can firmly say even ant no go follow me go!

Divoc19:
It's also not fun the see her in helpless situation either.
This is what has made our youth desperate for money The Pressure is always too much from loved ones.

Absolutely

It's still boils down on individuals/family's orientation. You don't have to cut corners or easily get influenced by peer pressure, all in the name of you want to put a smile on someone's face.

He can't hoard the money in his account while his mum goes hungry, he has no choice than to support.

Caleycashh:
Don't mind that guy, na their type they spoil family and are highly manipulative, them no go hussle but wan chop because una relate!... As Naija be so na only my Mom I send and the sending na when I dey alright!... I no follow anybody come this life and I can firmly say even ant no go follow me go!

Lol

In a nutshell you owe no man, with exception to your mum

Caleycashh:
You better tough up bro!, someone asked if you're dead will they call you!?... She's 100% stating reality, distance yourself from demanding people and achieve something for yourself!, cus if you are worthless or even dead none of them will care!, na person wey belleful dey give person food wey im remain. Really at the end it's you and you alone that matters most, it's an unfair world we live in!

not everyone has that mindset to get tough

Naturally giving is part of some people, the moment you asked they give. Expect you don't ask

Even if you don't ask, they might want to know how you've been fairing. Especially their nuclear family and perhaps closed friends/associates

Caleycashh:
that's how it is bro!... As we come alone naso we go leave alone oo, even person mother no go follow m go talk more of others!

Omo I do send money home everytime when everything was rosy.I sent a huge amount for them to invest for me and now I need to sell of the investment they are telling me stories. .I was in huge debt men ..Na only God know how I take survive.
From there I no send anybody again.Make everybody go Bleep themselves.

jimmychang:


Omo I do send money home everytime when everything was rosy.I sent a huge amount for them to invest for me and now I need to sell of the investment they are telling me stories. .I was in huge debt men ..Na only God know how I take survive.
From there I no send anybody again.Make everybody go Bleep themselves.

Hahahaa, bros when e comes to money trust no one!!!

VTJN:
not everyone has that mindset to get tough

Naturally giving is part of some people, the moment you asked they give. Expect you don't ask

Even if you don't ask, they might want to know how you've been fairing. Especially their nuclear family and perhaps closed friends/associates

II was like that bro... Even displease my self to please a lot of ungrateful idiots, well I learned the hard way when I was deported and actually know the real mindset of people, I can tell you 99% people stick around cus of what they will benefit from you the painful part is when you are down they will be the ones mocking you, one thing I'm grateful for is that I'm still young and going higher everyday, now I no send even ant, they can all go to hell!!!

Caleycashh:
Hahahaa, bros when e comes to money trust no one!!!

Exactly my bro

VTJN:
Lol

In a nutshell you owe no man, with exception to your mum

100%

OP, the secret of success is in reading books. I recommend Richest Man in Babylon for you. It's insightful and will help you on making your choices. You'll realise that saving, at least, a tenth of your salary would not hurt you at all. You'll still remain the same and as if you spent it.

I know this is very hard but please, try.

Daniel058:


They should be farming if they live in the village, how can people living in village bother someone in the City paying bills here And there to be sending money for food.
Unless she has a health challenges.

Some moms wicked Kwa , though myself almost 90% of my family(immiate) members depend on me but if any of them try frustrate me , I will tell the very person never to dial my number again . You can't kill yourself because they are your family members . You are not God... Most people becomes very lazy when they see that someone is taking care of their bills. op don't let your kindness kill you, talk to her and your siblings that amount you Make is much money in their mind.

Noted: Try the Best you can for them and never abandon them whatsoever the situation maybe, because if you do you might regret it
till the end of time. Nobody is lazy is just that things ain't working right again in the country at the moment.

Moxil:
Good day lovers of Nairaland, sincerely speaking, am writing this with sadness in my heart
I graduated from a federal polytechnic last two years, while I was in school, I hustle hard to train myself by running assignment, projects and seminars for my fellow students, sometimes I missed classes just for me to meet up in financial aspect as nobody to help, then I finally graduated 2019...
Though during my stay in school, from the little I gather from hustling around I still send some money to my parents in the Villa for them to eat and buy what they need to buy as nobody to be of help...

Now it happens that am working in a place that am getting 40k as salary, the responsibilities now become so terrible that I can't even save a Kobo at the end of the month
Mumsy keeps calling, siblings keeps calling, feeding, clothing and other minor expenses, am just like is this how am going to continue living my life....

Am so tired of everything right now....just imagine getting to know that am still having like 2400 in my account in the morning and mumsy called around 12pm that she has not eating since yesterday....I don't have any option than to send the 2000 to her just now left with nothing...

Everything seems to be going worse...why is this life so harsh, a lot of plans to be great but no help to meet up.... expenses all day without a better of getting income

Dude dont try to please anyone..Your parents choose to bring you to this world, they should take care of themselves as well. Yours is yo play any part that you can. Stop listening to very useless advices and suggestions up there You dont kill yourself to please people. Especially people that you should be their responsibility. You can decide to send between 10-15per month to the house at the end of the month, and it ends there...Family peoblemyno dey finish..Your parents started this problem by giving birth to many with little resources, its their problem to solve not yours. Peace