I'm typing this post with tears in my eyes, anytime I see families going to places of worship together, eating together etc. I always wish that is my family!

I lost my father at a tender age in 1995, (though I wasn't born with a silver spoon (in my mouth).
Then my mother took me down to village, after I completed my primary school at village, I relocated back to Jos for my secondary education.

As a teenager/orphan in the street, I sponsored my secondary education from A to Z! After my secondary school I moved to Abuja in search of better life, I got a menial job, after a short while the company collapsed.

Since I don't have any adviser or helper, I returned to Jos and invested my savings into transportation, hoping to further my education, unfortunately, the 'little' business crashed!!!

I didn't give up, I moved down to Port Harcourt, there I met a big/rich man and served him, while serving him I acquired my professional diploma, when the man knew about it and discovered that I'm an orphan he was impressed and immediately he secured a job for me at the place of his work.

Being somebody who's multi-talented, again, while seeking admission I invested my money into entertainment, I shot three videos and promoted the videos in Port Harcourt, Abuja, Jos and Lagos and eventually completed the album.

When I got admission at the University of Port Harcourt, with the little savings that I had, I'd decided to invest #750,000 into transportation as a backup-source for my education in case the current job ends, but unfortunately, lost gave me another heavy blow! I ended up selling that car 250k, What intrigued me is that two months later I met the guy who bought the car and asked him whether the car is still troubling him, he said nothing was wrong with the car. My neighbour invested #85, 000 on a car and he 'ate the fruit of his labour'. Despite the fact that mine was a second-new (direct-belgium), everything 'diminished' mysteriously.

In the middle of my studies, AMCON liquidated/took over the company where I was working that the owner/company was indebted to the tune of over #90 billion naira, then almost 95 per cent of us were paid off.
My gratuity and my savings was close to 700k,

When I made a wide consultation majority advised that I should go into transportation again that I shouldn't give up, and they recommended a Mazda for me, when I hearkened to their advice and bought the Mazda brand, believe me, the car refused to work after both manual and digital diagnoses from one mechanical workshop to the other. After I've spent all that I had on the car, no money to renew my rent, my landlord evicted me (one room).

Then the mechanics/car electricians and friends had advised me to seek spiritual help that this is not ordinary. Each time before I invest in any business I must seek the face of God (Prayers and fasting) since I don't have any best friend apart from God/Jesus.

As a 'fatalist' but I was convinced by their advice and being a Catholic I headed to church for counseling (one of the parishes in PH), right at the gate, I was told that I can't see any of the priests because of covid 19 protocol, then I headed to a nearby Protestant/Pentecostal church, when I met the resident pastor and narrated to him my ordeals in life. He shed tears and 'revealed to me that the hand of God is upon me, God is calling me but I don't want to answer His call that's why I'm experiencing these misfortunes and crises in my life, that my call is to be an evangelist not a pastor. Regardless of covid 19 he prayed for me!

But deep down, I don't want to become a man of God because poverty/setback has dealt with me mercilessly, if I do today because of chronic-poverty/setback then I'll become nothing but a (419) materialistic man of God, definitely, whether I like it or not wealth must influence me. Let me have the money first... As in the case of Mathew a treasurer of the state...equivalent to the present secretary to the government of the federation, he left his position and all that he had and followed Jesus...That's my logic about the situation.

My life is full of sorrow... when I remember that anytime I'm about to step into my glory that's when misfortune strikes: I invested up to #1.2 m, on my music career I didn't reap a dime, the manager who's trying to get a record label for me in Lagos has died, I still planned to go and live with my brother in-law in Lagos at the end of my programme, my in-law too passed away. Again, I've planned to move to Lagos in 2020 but unfortunately covid 19 pandemic stroke in, killed and buried my dream of becoming a super star.

I was offered automatic employment with Arik air, the day the group chairman of the company arrived Port Harcourt to collect our files, that very night federal government seized Arik air my dream of living a happy life was shattered.

I'm still feel pains whenever I remembered the amount of money I've invested on various investments over the years without yilding positive results.

Now I'm penny less, not long ago within this year, a good Samaritan made an offer for me to travel out (Europe) for my masters if my result is finally out, where can I get funds for my Visa and other logistics? Currently, I'm doing 'multiple' domestic job for somebody and my salary is #20,000, I attend two-hours lecture in a day and three times in a week, my fare/transport from elelenwo to choba to-and-fro is one k.
Now my current boss is threatening to sack me that he can't be paying me full salary for part time job.

Despite the fact that I am not comfortable with the job, I am still managing it while seeking another one but if the man finally sack/kick me out of his house,... anything can happen! My questions now are;
what have I done to deserve this? What are my sins? Will my suffering ever end in this life? Is God truly watching me? Did God leave me to my fate because I'm fatherless/orphan? Etc.
For the past 25 years now I'm battling with poverty in the streets

Please for counseling, prayers etc contact me:
melasalmona@yahoo.com

Because I'm beginning to see suicide as best option.

Suicide is never an option. Please contact me. www.lovelashblog.com

Lovelash:
Suicide is never an option. Please contact me. www.lovelashblog.com

Ok thanks, I'll

Sorry if this sounds harsh but a times people need to hear the hard truth.

You're an ingrate!

Do you know how many people who were not orphans would have given to have been in your shoes?

Look at the countless opportunities you've had and you still have the audacity to blame God?

You need to learn to be grateful first otherwise you'd only have yourself to blame, because yours is not a lack of opportunities but wrong choices.

God bless.

jesusjnr2020:
Sorry if this sounds harsh but a times people need to hear the hard truth.

You're an ingrate!

Do you know how many people who were not orphans would have give to have been in your shoes?

Look at the countless opportunities you've had and you still have the audacity to blame God?

You need to learn to be grateful first otherwise you'd only have yourself to blame, because yours is not a lack of opportunities but wrong choices.

God bless.

I believe you just 'skimmed' the article, please read it again and tell me the wrong choice

Guy make I tell you d truth when God call u and you refuse what is happening to you will become worst till you answer the call o , look st the story of Jonah , I go advice you to answer the call give your life to him and he’ll bless you beyond measures

Melagros:
I'm typing this post with tears in my eyes, anytime I see families going to places of worship together, eating together etc. I always wish that is my family!

I lost my father at a tender age in 1995, (though I wasn't born with a silver spoon (in my mouth).
Then my mother took me down to village, after I completed my primary school at village, I relocated back to Jos for my secondary education.

As a teenager/orphan in the street, I sponsored my secondary education from A to Z! After my secondary school I moved to Abuja in search of better life, I got a menial job, after a short while the company collapsed.

Since I don't have any adviser or helper, I returned to Jos and invested my savings into transportation, hoping to further my education, unfortunately, the 'little' business crashed!!!

I didn't give up, I moved down to Port Harcourt, there I met a big/rich man and served him, while serving him I acquired my professional diploma, when the man knew about it and discovered that I'm an orphan he was impressed and immediately he secured a job for me at the place of his work.

Being somebody who's multi-talented, again, while seeking admission I invested my money into entertainment, I shot three videos and promoted the videos in Port Harcourt, Abuja, Jos and Lagos and eventually completed the album.

When I got admission at the University of Port Harcourt, with the little savings that I had, I'd decided to invest #750,000 into transportation as a backup-source for my education in case the current job ends, but unfortunately, lost gave me another heavy blow! I ended up selling that car 250k, What intrigued me is that two months later I met the guy who bought the car and asked him whether the car is still troubling him, he said nothing was wrong with the car. My neighbour invested #85, 000 on a car and he 'ate the fruit of his labour'. Despite the fact that mine was a second-new (direct-belgium), everything 'diminished' mysteriously.

In the middle of my studies, AMCON liquidated/took over the company where I was working that the owner/company was indebted to the tune of over #90 billion naira, then almost 95 per cent of us were paid off.
My gratuity and my savings was close to 700k,

When I made a wide consultation majority advised that I should go into transportation again that I shouldn't give up, and they recommended a Mazda for me, when I hearkened to their advice and bought the Mazda brand, believe me, the car refused to work after both manual and digital diagnoses from one mechanical workshop to the other. After I've spent all that I had on the car, no money to renew my rent, my landlord evicted me (one room).

Then the mechanics/car electricians and friends had advised me to seek spiritual help that this is not ordinary. Each time before I invest in any business I must seek the face of God (Prayers and fasting) since I don't have any best friend apart from God/Jesus.

As a 'fatalist' but I was convinced by their advice and being a Catholic I headed to church for counseling (one of the parishes in PH), right at the gate, I was told that I can't see any of the priests because of covid 19 protocol, then I headed to a nearby Protestant/Pentecostal church, when I met the resident pastor and narrated to him my ordeals in life. He shed tears and 'revealed to me that the hand of God is upon me, God is calling me but I don't want to answer His call that's why I'm experiencing these misfortunes and crises in my life, that my call is to be an evangelist not a pastor. Regardless of covid 19 he prayed for me!

But deep down, I don't want to become a man of God because poverty/setback has dealt with me mercilessly, if I do today because of chronic-poverty/setback then I'll become nothing but a (419) materialistic man of God, definitely, whether I like it or not wealth must influence me. Let me have the money first... As in the case of Mathew a treasurer of the state...equivalent to the present secretary to the government of the federation, he left his position and all that he had and followed Jesus...That's my logic about the situation.

My life is full of sorrow... when I remember that anytime I'm about to step into my glory that's when misfortune strikes: I invested up to #1.2 m, on my music career I didn't reap a dime, the manager who's trying to get a record label for me in Lagos has died, I still planned to go and live with my brother in-law in Lagos at the end of my programme, my in-law too passed away. Again, I've planned to move to Lagos in 2020 but unfortunately covid 19 pandemic stroke in, killed and buried my dream of becoming a super star.

I was offered automatic employment with Arik air, the day the group chairman of the company arrived Port Harcourt to collect our files, that very night federal government seized Arik air my dream of living a happy life was shattered.

I'm still feel pains whenever I remembered the amount of money I've invested on various investments over the years without yilding positive results.

Now I'm penny less, not long ago within this year, a good Samaritan made an offer for me to travel out (Europe) for my masters if my result is finally out, where can I get funds for my Visa and other logistics? Currently, I'm doing 'multiple' domestic job for somebody and my salary is #20,000, I attend two-hours lecture in a day and three times in a week, my fare/transport from elelenwo to choba to-and-fro is one k.
Now my current boss is threatening to sack me that he can't be paying me full salary for part time job.

Despite the fact that I am not comfortable with the job, I am still managing it while seeking another one but if the man finally sack/kick me out of his house,... anything can happen! My questions now are;
what have I done to deserve this? What are my sins? Will my suffering ever end in this life? Is God truly watching me? Did God leave me to my fate because I'm fatherless/orphan? Etc.
For the past 25 years now I'm battling with poverty in the streets

Please for counseling, prayers etc contact me:
melasalmona@yahoo.com

Because I'm beginning to see suicide as best option.

Melagros:

Ok thanks, I'll

email me: nifemilash@gmail.com

Azammmi:
Guy make I tell you d truth when God call u and you refuse what is happening to you will become worst till you answer the call o , look st the story of Jonah , I go advice you to answer the call give your life to him and he’ll bless you beyond measures

Anyway thanks for your contribution

No talk say u no hear sha , follow God your own go better

Melagros:

Anyway thanks for your contribution

Melagros:
I
Now I'm penny less, not long ago within this year, a good Samaritan made an offer for me to travel out (Europe) for my masters if my result is finally out, where can I get funds for my Visa and other logistics? Currently, I'm doing 'multiple' domestic job for somebody and my salary is #20,000, I attend two-hours lecture in a day and three times in a week, my fare/transport from elelenwo to choba to-and-fro is one k.
Now my current boss is threatening to sack me that he can't be paying me full salary for part time job.

Despite the fact that I am not comfortable with the job, I am still managing it while seeking another one but if the man finally sack/kick me out of his house,... anything can happen! My questions now are;
what have I done to deserve this? What are my sins? Will my suffering ever end in this life? Is God truly watching me? Did God leave me to my fate because I'm fatherless/orphan? Etc.
For the past 25 years now I'm battling with poverty in the streets

Please for counseling, prayers etc contact me:
melasalmona@yahoo.com

Because I'm beginning to see suicide as best option.

Please trust God to bring you through your current circumstance and to better soon. I do know that God is Father to those who have none and mother to the motherless.

If you can help it, try not to focus too much on the current situation. Look for ways to distract yourself while you wait on God to fight on your behalf.

Kobojunkie:
Please trust God to bring you through your current circumstance and to better soon. I do know that God is Father to those who have none and mother to the motherless.

If you can help it, try not to focus too much on the current situation. Look for ways to distract yourself while you wait on God to fight on your behalf.

I appreciate your input

Bro I sympathize with you what you are facing can be likened to ants infesting a place where sugar can be found.The difficulties your are going through is a pointer to the fact that you are a great person and forces are only trying to frustrate you,My brother know this and know peace.I pray for you that the lord preserve you and also make you prosper.

lostnegro:
Bro I sympathize with you what you are facing can be likened to ants infesting a place where sugar can be found.The difficulties your are going through is a pointer to the fact that you are a great person and forces are only trying to frustrate you,My brother know this and know peace.I pray for you that the lord preserve you and also make you prosper.

thank you