Football vs Sex

1. Going to ur boyfriend or girlfriend house without being invited= OFFSIDE
2. Dating a girl 2day have sex same day= FREE KICK
3. Condom= DEFENDER
4. Abortion= RED CARD
5. Condom break= PENALTY
6. Girl with a lot of energy= CAPTAIN
7. Having sex without condom= OWN GOAL
8. Going out and taking a lot of time before coming back= MAN OF THE MATCH
9. Sex three girls in a day= HATTRICKS
10. Eight years of sex without pregnancy= ARSENAL
11. After 2 rounds of sex and u still request for more= EXTRA TIME
12. Taking it gently wen
having sex= FAIR PLAY
13. Biting ur girlfriend nipple= SUAREZ
14. Two legs on the shoulder= THROW IN
15. Asking her on hw do u want it?= INSTRUCTIONS FROM THE TOUCH LINE
16. A lady using pills after sex and get pregnant= DEFENSIVE ERROR
17. Having sex with ur girlfriend and ur mom open the door= INJURY
18. Lady getting pregnant= GOOOOOOOOOOOOAL
19. Girl telling u to stop= YELLOW CARD
20. De guy that inpregnant the girl= ACTIVE STRICKER
The person that is reading it= ACTIVE FAN

Hmmm not my handwriting oooooo

7.

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When you lick plate - Header
When you spread legs - Scissors kick
When you self-service yourself - Own goal
When you take from the back - Barca
When you do anal - Arsenal
When she's your bestie - Friendly match
When it's your house - Home match
When you do 69 - Counter attack