Good day nairalander. I am creating this thread according to the previous thread named My wedding has finally crashed. Pls pardon my writings as am not too good with English writing.

Here is my own story according to the previous thread.
Seems like we both are going through the same issues mentioned by you. Acoording to the thread my marriage has finally collapse. Infact it looks like your wife is related to my own wife in some certain ways cos she exhibit same trait your wife display. You have said all and a word is enough for the wise. Single guys should open their eyes and pray real hard before settling down with any lady expecially those that were raised by single ladies and those that came out of polygamous home. They are really toxic and unbearable. My wife mom abandone them to their father when they were young and it was their step mom that raised them. The father had many wives and also her mum married multiple husband before she married their father and still left him to marry another again. So you can imagine how messed up their background was. I knew all this when i was still dating her but let me say i was carried away with love or probably lust and didnt make me consider those things.
The issue am facing now with my woman, when i maried her, i only did traditional marriage and didnt do any registry. After the traditional, madam show me hell o that i was even looking for a way out cos of peace of mind. Now after some years, my father inlaw just called me recently that we should go and do our registry which is court wedding. He mentioned that he gave me a week to get this done and if i dont have enough funds , he is willing to assist financially. Now my question is with the way my wife has behave in the past, should i still go ahead and do the court wedding now after 5 years we did our traditional. Pls i need answers and advice from matured married men out there cos if left to me, i am not doing any court wedding cos the way i look at it, i dont think our marriage will last with the way my wife had behaved. If its you, will you proceed to do the court marriage.

Hummmmmm... 5 years of marriage? You are still doubting your marriage? Is it because your father in-law said he gave you one week or what?! Or he is willing to help financially Or you are still in the marriage because her father is rich, please tell us the other side of the story jare Like seriously, I'm totally lost you know the answer yourself unless you are here telling lies

Poster, I'd advise that you shun his threat.

Him daughter no dey give you peace of mind and him still want you to tie yourself more.

BTW, what will happen if the one week he gave you elapse?

If you don't feel like doing it please don't.

Yes

You're the one wearing the shoe and you alone know where it pinches you, with what that man narrated yesterday and you saying you are experiencing a similar thing, I'll beg you in the name of God if you want to live long don't go ahead with such marriage. The Bible clearly stated that it is good to live at the roof top than living in the same house with a troublesome woman, the Bible can't lie. For your peace of mind and for you to live long and train your children, do away with such woman while you can... Have a good day sir

After making up your mind, and now YOU NEED ADVICE only from "MATURED MARRIED MEN" right? Okay...let me tell you something; You made your woman what she has become!! You are waste up in this and definately not a damnnn niggarrrrr been in NL since 2011

Peace of mind is golden,

I don’t know why women and their families even bother Nigerian men for “court marriage”. Apart from relocation purposes and proof of marriage in some organizations, I won’t go to the registry with any Nigerian man.

Of what use is it? Do they pay alimony?
Even child support, if the man doesn’t have conscience, you will drag and tire.

After going to the registry, the man can easily decide to marry another wife traditionally, while tying the woman down. They will na tell you to live apart for 2 years before you guys can separate. Guy man fit done born 2 with his new wife. The woman will be there, attending all the crusades in Lagos. Abeg o.

Baba, abort that mission pronto. If after good five years you aren't convinced about the propriety of your wife, why make it a lifetime commitment? Why fetter yourself with commitment whose result/benefits you are certain will produce agony and pain? Bob Marley advocates we should "emancipate yourselves from mental slavery." Doing what gives you pain is a form of self-hate. Or, are you a masochist?

It's clear you have endured rather than enjoyed the marriage so far, why is it that you can't disclose to your ordeal to your father-in-law? Are you afraid of him? What are your fears exactly? No one is going to save you, if you don't do what is necessary to protect yourself from becoming insane because of a woman.

Your nonsense description of her family background is totally off, it does not define who she is,

I know of a man raised by a single mother, he is a very evil and nasty creature to his wife and children, I also know a daughter to a single mother, she is a sweet soul to her in laws and everyone else, they all love her,

I know a lady and a man from a dysfunctional polygamous home who have taken it upon themselves to not let their background define them, they are doing well in their homes today,

I also know one idiot man from a stable home who is mentally insane, who feels he is bigger and greater than God himself, sees every breathing thing as lesser beings who should pay homage to him alone, I do not want to talk about the female part.....

With all this scenery I painted oga Op, is their negative character a sum product of their background or it is an individual trait?

You have not told us why you married her despite all you knew.

Please disregard and ignore your FIL's threat. Your decision should be based on the state of the relationship with your wife.

You've said a lot of things without saying nothing.

InTheCloudySky:
You've said a lot of things without saying nothing.

I'm trying to understand it all..

OP, do you mean that your wife is still like that now orrr it's all in the past? Cos if after 5yrs, you do not see a beautiful future with her.. 5yrs of living, lusting & sharing memories together and it's still pretty hazy, I dunno but you both do not have any business going the long way.

I don't understand the Op. Tell us what your wife did to you and how you have contributed to the whole crisis. Blaming single parenting on every issue in your marriage sounds like you are a weakling. Give us instances, let us judge base on that not generalizing a post. Even widows and widowers are single parents, you mean none can raised children properly? If your five year marriage is not working please part ways and move on with your life. Stop giving excuses

Do the registry, even if it's for doing sake. You are a real man, for you to have been together for 5 years, with these complains about her and you're not even hinting on divorce, you have tried my brother.

Just do IT. It's nothing different.
I pray, she will appreciate you sooner or later.

Marriage is not all rosy. Every married couple have a story to tell. This is yours.

Afodot0022:


Pls i need answers and advice from matured married men out there cos if left to me, i am not doing any court wedding cos the way i look at it, i dont think our marriage will last with the way my wife had behaved. If its you, will you proceed to do the court marriage.

My concern is the ultimatum from the father. He the man of your home and decide what you want with your wife and not what your father-in-law wants.

Based on your concerns, you may want to seek counseling with your wife and be truthful to discuss the future of you both together.

Do that court wedding at your own peril. With all the red flags you still wanna go enter a legal bondage? Think like a real man! Never give in to threat and never be at mercy of anybody!

Divoc19:
Do the registry, even if it's for doing sake. You are a real man, for you to have been together for 5 years, with these complains about her and you're not even hinting on divorce, you have tried my brother.

Just do IT. It's nothing different.
I pray, she will appreciate you sooner or later.

Marriage is not all rosy. Every married couple have a story to tell. This is yours.

At the bolded, why would you advise such?

He is already in it and he is not asking for divorce.

Registry Marriage no dey kill person

MufasaLion:


At the bolded, why would you advise such?

Afodot0022:
Good day nairalander. I am creating this thread according to the previous thread named My wedding has finally crashed. Pls pardon my writings as am not too good with English writing.

Here is my own story according to the previous thread.
Seems like we both are going through the same issues mentioned by you. Acoording to the thread my marriage has finally collapse. Infact it looks like your wife is related to my own wife in some certain ways cos she exhibit same trait your wife display. You have said all and a word is enough for the wise. Single guys should open their eyes and pray real hard before settling down with any lady expecially those that were raised by single ladies and those that came out of polygamous home. They are really toxic and unbearable. My wife mom abandone them to their father when they were young and it was their step mom that raised them. The father had many wives and also her mum married multiple husband before she married their father and still left him to marry another again. So you can imagine how messed up their background was. I knew all this when i was still dating her but let me say i was carried away with love or probably lust and didnt make me consider those things.
The issue am facing now with my woman, when i maried her, i only did traditional marriage and didnt do any registry. After the traditional, madam show me hell o that i was even looking for a way out cos of peace of mind. Now after some years, my father inlaw just called me recently that we should go and do our registry which is court wedding. He mentioned that he gave me a week to get this done and if i dont have enough funds , he is willing to assist financially. Now my question is with the way my wife has behave in the past, should i still go ahead and do the court wedding now after 5 years we did our traditional. Pls i need answers and advice from matured married men out there cos if left to me, i am not doing any court wedding cos the way i look at it, i dont think our marriage will last with the way my wife had behaved. If its you, will you proceed to do the court marriage.

Why is the man interfering suddenly, even giving you a deadline. Don't try that crab,tell your siblings and parents. The man and his daughter have bad plans,don't allow any sickos to coarse you. Ask them if ''TRADITIONAL MARRIAGE IS NOT LEGAL''.
Guyman, use your upper. Take away your property and investment documents from that house. Oboy, be guided

Isi gini?

[quote author=Afodot0022 post=104208553]Good day nairalander. I am creating this thread according to the previous thread named My wedding has finally crashed. Pls pardon my writings as am not too good with English writing.

Here is my own story according to the previous thread.
Seems like we both are going through the same issues mentioned by you. Acoording to the thread my marriage has finally collapse. Infact it looks like your wife is related to my own wife in some certain ways cos she exhibit same trait your wife display. You have said all and a word is enough for the wise. Single guys should open their eyes and pray real hard before settling down with any lady expecially those that were raised by single ladies and those that came out of polygamous home. They are really toxic and unbearable. My wife mom abandone them to their father when they were young and it was their step mom that raised them. The father had many wives and also her mum married multiple husband before she married their father and still left him to marry another again. So you can imagine how messed up their background was. I knew all this when i was still dating her but let me say i was carried away with love or probably lust and didnt make me consider those things.
The issue am facing now with my woman, when i maried her, i only did traditional marriage and didnt do any registry. After the traditional, madam show me hell o that i was even looking for a way out cos of peace of mind. Now after some years, my father inlaw just called me recently that we should go and do our registry which is court wedding. He mentioned that he gave me a week to get this done and if i dont have enough funds , he is willing to assist financially. Now my question is with the way my wife has behave in the past, should i still go ahead and do the court wedding now after 5 years we did our traditional. Oga pls don't try to take such risk of doing court marriage with her. Let her father do his worst.