Got talking with a friend who just moved to Lagos about 7 months ago..
About 2years ago, he was in a financial tussle and and couldn't feed his family as things got extremely worst for him.. So his wife advice she goes to her mother's place till things pick up for him. They live in Sango Ota then.. Her wife left for her mother's place at ede with their 2kids..the mother is a civil servant who earns little and she lives in a room.
The wife got a job in a bar where she works from 3pm to 10pm and sometimes 11pm..

Now my friend is not dojng bad for himself and decides to move his family to join him in Lagos..
Each time he initiate this move, the wife will look for an excuse not to come.. Said they've discussed this more than 10 times already and just some days ago, the wife told him the manager of the bar she works just got another place and wants to make her the manager..
He said only if my friend could open a shop for her where she sells pet drinks, bottle water and other edible things and my friend said no problem about that but knowing her, she might come up with another excuse.

He just got a 2 bedroom apartment and probability of him leaving Nigeria next year is like 80%..
Pls house, what can he do?
He loves his wife and missed his kids.. Atleast for a year, he want his kids to be with him. They are just 5yrs and 3yrs and they been separated almost 2 yrs now..
The wife even told him sometimes ago to come pick his kids but he won't be able to cope with the nature of work he does and he can't employ a nanny or house help to take care of them going by what happens nowaday in the country..
Sometimes, he can be away for 2days or a week..
Another thing, he said he doesn't wanna look selfish since his wife might be given a manager role in a new bar. He doesn't want to be like a stumbling block to her though he promised to open a shop, stock it even more than she thinks..
He is very confused...

Ishilove
Pocahontas
Abeg nairaland female and males, help me to advice him, I don't like the way he was behaving yesterday, he looks so moody

There are some matters I don't just conclude, the woman might have seen hell taking care of the children when the husband was away or the husband didn't know where they live or still move closer to the family? I think their communication and intimacy are still so dull, why not inform her mother or sit down together to know how to move the family forward since the husband is traveling out of the country next year and he is still always away to work 2 days, Osun to Lagos is far, they can still make it work. I can't blame the wife, we are all human being, that is why good communication and intimacy is good for good couples, some men think money is everything? No! Women need companionship even when you are far. I don't know if the woman is there because of someone making her relax and happy than the husband that is only hustling for money let him find a week to go and know where the wife is.

A manager just like that? . A bar manager for that matter?

First of all,women(bannies) who work in hotels and bars always have a higher tendency of getting proposals from different men...And you and I know that women have chicken brains that ordinary mere things can easily entice

Oga op,tell your friend that a nairalander named obax said he should just start counting his loses already because it's very clear that madam is already codedly chewing another sweeter diick

That woman don go....She has already set her mind to purpose of leaving your friend...If not,those her mumu excuses no join one bit self

Choi.. Another guy man don dey chop him wife ooohh!!

Crossroad1:
Got talking with a friend who just moved to Lagos about 7 months ago..

I hate it, when you make humans like you feel irreplaceable, be it husband, or be it wife, because the other person tends to take it for granted... That woman never talk wetin dey make her avoid her husband, because a responsible woman sef, will be the one disturbing her husband so much on why they have to be together, not in this case she asking the man to come pick his kids while she continues selling beer... The man should inform thier families..

BKsoul:
I hate it, when you make humans like you feel irreplaceable, be it husband, or be it wife, because the other person tends to take it for granted... That woman never talk wetin dey make her avoid her husband, because a responsible woman sef, will be the one disturbing her husband so much on why they have to be together, not in this case she asking the man to come pick his kids while she continues selling beer... The man should inform thier families..

she said the wife's mother have on several occasions told him to come pick his family.. The mother wants the family together.. The woman left her husband due to violence and abuse which she still suffer back injury from till date but says she regret leaving her husband..
Na the guy wife be the problem now..

Sonnobax15:

A manager just like that? . A bar manager for that matter?

First of all,women(bannies) who work in hotels and bars always have a higher tendency of getting proposals from different men...And you and I know that women have a chicken brain that ordinary mere things can easily entice

Oga op,tell your friend that a nairalander named obax said he should just start counting his loses already because it's very clear that madam is already codedly chewing another sweeter diick

That woman don go....She has already set her mind to purpose of leaving your friend...If not,those her mumu excuses no join one bit self

I even suspect she is having an affair with the so call manager but I can tell him this make I no kuku finish am..
But what about the kids she doesn't have time for?
And no be say she even get her own apartment, she still lives in a room with her mom, her siblings and the kids

Vegetable man,I hate men who are not in control,his wife joining him should be a command.Somehow I like redpillers, those ones that are loving and not toxic but have things under their control and talk less.

I think he has lost the so called wife already.. Imagine her telling him to come take d kids,while she continue her patrol (work) at the bar. She used the "about to be manager thing" loose guard the said husband Some women sabi manipulate some men sha.
She value bar work pass family Whala be like wetin again?

Crossroad1:
she said the wife's mother have on several occasions told him to come pick his family.. The mother wants the family together.. The woman left her husband due to violence and abuse which she still suffer back injury from till date but says she regret leaving her husband..
Na the guy wife be the problem now..

Na the same thing we dey talk.... Your friend is making that silly woman feel irreplaceable, he should take one of his matured brother, both of them should go to the wife's family, tell her and the mum that since she has refused to come home, that he wants to take a new wife, and he will be going with his kids to go stay with his own mum, let everything be on record, every of thier calls should be on record, because once that silly woman realizes that the grass is not greener on the other side, she will come with blackmail on how she stood by him and made him what he is today but she no fit make herself... On no account should he beg her, he should behave like a strong man, because if he begs her to come home, that woman will use him to play ludo oooh, the next thing you will hear when ever the man says or does anything is shebi you are the one who begged me to come home...

BigYash:
I think he has lost the so called wife already.. Imagine her telling him to come take d kids,while she continue her patrol (work) at the bar. She used the "about to be manager thing" loose guard the said husband Some women sabi manipulate some men sha.
She value bar work pass family Whala be like wetin again?

As in eehn.... God , any day you want to give me husband, God please don't bring weak men my side...

BKsoul:
As in eehn.... God , any day you want to give me husband, God please don't bring weak men my side...

Wow! I pray some of the SIMPs see your comment here,so that they will learn.(Even though some of them will forever be weakling). And I pray God gives you a real man,and not a Weakling (Simp)

BKsoul:
Na the same thing we dey talk.... Your friend is making that silly woman feel irreplaceable, he should take one of his matured brother, both of them should go to the wife's family, tell her and the mum that since she has refused to come home, that he wants to take a new wife, and he will be going with his kids to go stay with his own mum, let everything be on record, every of thier calls should be on record, because once that silly woman realizes that the grass is not greener on the other side, she will come with blackmail on how she stood by him and made him what he is today but she no fit make herself... On no account should he beg her, he should behave like a strong man, because if he begs her to come home, that woman will use him to play ludo oooh, the next thing you will hear when ever the man says or does anything is shebi you are the one who begged me to come home...

the guy na hard man, he just got soft because of the kids.. Let's assume he has someone he can trust to take care of the kids because his mom too is a very busy civil servant, he won't think twice about her

Somebody is seriously drilling the wife and making her lose her senses. She's also enjoy the relative freedom she's getting, forget the talk of making her a manager, that one na delay tactics. Women are gullible, you need strong hands to tame them.

BigYash:
Wow! I pray some of the SIMPs see your comment here,so that they will learn.. And I pray God gives you a real man,and not a Weakling (Simp)

I no too sabi type long, but let me tell you one story..... There is a couple i know, chukwuma and his wife, any small thingwey no reach anything, this woman will start packing her loads that she wants to go, the man will beg, or sometimes call her family, we go beg her... One faithful day, bro chukwuma called as usual that she has started packing her loads again because he told her to keep quiet, me wey dey hungry that day, i told bro chukwuma to grant her wish for once, so she will understand that she is now a married woman, na so bro chukwuma go charter taxi come ooh without the knowledge of his wife, as the woman see taxi, she shock, bro chukwuma told her to bring her packed load to taxi and leave his house, as in she should go to her father's house, he gave her 50thousand, that he will come for her, whenever he needs her, she begin beg, started calling everyone to beg her husband, when she called me, i told her to come home since its what she has ever wanted, madam said no ooooh, she can't leave her husband, then why do you want to give your husband bp, she had nothing to say.... They sha later settle... But my point of telling you this story is that since this last incident till today making 3 years, my sister has never packed her load again or threatened to leave...

The woman left her husband due to violence and abuse which she still suffer back injury from till date but says she regret leaving her husband..
Na the guy wife be the problem now.

Which nonsense talk is this? Then you are hiding some real stories from us, he is a woman beater?! She regret leaving her husband, hummmmmm.... Why is he insisting she should come over then? No wonder the woman is making herself happy in her new job

Please always say the truth, stop bringing half stories here so that God will not be angry with you creating lies against the woman and her children

Crossroad1:
the guy na hard man, he just got soft because of the kids.. Let's assume he has someone he can trust to take care of the kids because his mom too is a very busy civil servant, he won't think twice about her

abeg, he no hard anything... If she dies today? Will he follow her Abi he no go move on?

Wife lost already.

BKsoul:
I no too sabi type long, but let me tell you one story..... There is a couple i know, chukwuma and his wife, any small thingwey no reach anything, this woman will start packing her loads that she wants to go, the man will beg, or sometimes call her family, we go beg her... One faithful day, bro chukwuma called as usual that she has started packing her loads again because he told her to keep quiet, me wey dey hungry that day, i told bro chukwuma to grant her wish for once, so she will understand that she is now a married woman, na so bro chukwuma go charter taxi come ooh without the knowledge of his wife, as the woman see taxi, she shock, bro chukwuma told her to bring her packed load to taxi and leave his house, as in she should go to her father's house, he gave her 50thousand, that he will come for her, whenever he needs her, she begin beg, started calling everyone to beg her husband, when she called me, i told her to come home since its what she has ever wanted, madam said no ooooh, she can't leave her husband, then why do you want to give your husband bp, she had nothing to say.... They sha later settle... But my point of telling you this story is that since this last incident till today making 3 years, my sister has never packed her load again or threatened to leave...

If all SIMPs can just do like brother chucks for once. I discovered that women naturally love to test their men,and once a man falls for their manipulations, he will forever regret it.. Wait o.. Are you a male or female?Because this is the first time,I'm seeing a "f" with wisdom in relationship topics on nairaland...

BigYash:
If all SIMPs can just do like brother chucks for once. I discovered that women naturally love to test their men,and once a man falls for their manipulations, he will forever regret it.. Wait o.. Are you a male or female?Because this is the first time,I'm seeing a "f" with wisdom in relationship topics on nairaland...

Lol.....i am a female but its not a matter of being male or female, its a matter of knowing where to balance the equation.... Ask some married women whose husband rejects sex or food once there is an issue, and the women will beg before the man accepts to talk or even eat... The day those women stopped crying and begging thier husbands to eat or talk to them was the day those men stopped it... I never beg small pickin to eat, na big man with big gbola i will beg to eat ... If you have any issue, be it the male or female, common sense demands that you call your partner and sort things out...

BKsoul:
Lol.....i am a female but its not a matter of being male or female, its a matter of knowing where to balance the equation.... Ask some married women whose husband rejects sex or food once there is an issue, and the women will beg before the man accepts to talk or even eat... The day those women stopped crying and begging thier husbands to eat or talk to them was the day those men stopped it... I never beg small pickin to eat, na big man with big gbola i will beg to eat ... If you have any issue, be it the male or female, common sense demands that you call your partner and sort things out...

You're wise.. Keep it up...

BigYash:
You're wise.. Keep it up...

osheey.... I appreciate..

Pls read it again.. That was her mum's story, the mom don't want her life to be like hers

Olunmercy56:


The woman left her husband due to violence and abuse which she still suffer back injury from till date but says she regret leaving her husband..
Na the guy wife be the problem now.

Which nonsense talk is this? Then you are hiding some real stories from us, he is a woman beater?! She regret leaving her husband, hummmmmm.... Why is he insisting she should come over then? No wonder the woman is making herself happy in her new job

Please always say the truth, stop bringing half stories here so that God will not be angry with you creating lies against the woman and her children

See reason why i dey always tell me Niqqa's " noh follow full housewife package" even billionaire's wife's dey work, our brodas go get small raba dey form bill gate. Had it been d woman get the "small office" as his about to do now, e for noh get problem wen e go broke, dem for noh even separate in d first place, nah to dey manage with her small income plus his own side hustle too.
Logically dem don divorce since wen she pack go her mama house.
Make e just forget her go find a responsible, business oriented lady to marry, at least he go dey wise dis tym

Crossroad1:
Pls read it again.. That was her mum's story, the mom don't want her life to be like hers

Okay