I just want to read about other people's experience. I might not be able to describe the phenomenon, but I'll try (bear with me)

We have been married for over a decade now with kids. Like all human interactions (marriage not excluded) we've had our problems but we always manage to resolve it (patience is key - an advice to married couples).

About 3 week ago after one of our usual argument (over some flimsy issue). She walked to me told me we need to talk. She said, and I paraphrase; "If we keep on arguing like this my love for you will keep reducing, and I'll only be staying with you for the kids". She then left for the room. After some few minutes she called me on phone and said "come and take me out" (this was around mid night). She then started crying and complaining of severe headache. She said she wants to go out for a walk at midnight, and crying and acting wired. She loves playing the Qur'an from her phone but at this point she asked me to take it far away from her and lots of other drama.

After about 30 to 40 mins she snapped out of it, her tone changed and she asked me "what are you doing here, are you not coming to bed". As if nothing happened, and when I told her about the incident and our discussions (about the kids and our love) she had absolutely no recollection of it whatsoever (even though it happened just moments ago). She just said she is having severe headaches. I could sense she was visibly disturbed when I told her because she hates any form of mental illness attributed to her.

Recently we travelled and she slept in my sisters place. In the morning she told me she had those severe headaches again and almost called me to come get her in the middle of the night because she was terrified and didn't want to snap into that state again and end up embarrassing her self at my sisters house.

Looking back at some fights we've had over the years couldn't help but think could it be that "she wasn't the one" I've been having these arguments with, but I only start noticing recently?

She normally gets into this state when she's angry (so I try to avoid getting her angry - but its quite hard)

She told me that recently she's been having some wired and fetish urges (even though I have known her to be a good woman)

I don't know if this make sense. I have always thought this kind of things (splits, possession etc.) happened to pretty women (and my wife falls in this category).

I am not the superstitious type and have resolved to stand by her, no one knows about this and I intend to keep it like this as long as it is not beyond our control. But I just want to here from people out there with similar experience

N.B I hope she's not on NL

You have to find a way to help her overcome it (the episodes).

hmm I don't know what to say

That's the early stage of schizophrenia she needs help asap!

Everything else apart from that is normal - She's a good mom, I love her, we have the normal couples fight and reconcile again, she's even doing her PhD in a STEM course.

In the past we had been ascribing these headaches to typhoid or malaria (even though some times it is the case) but they just seem to never go away. Oh yes she is also hypertensive. She is quite an interesting being. Could these physical ailments be the cause of this psychological "thing" or is it the other way round.

I am not naïve to discount there are things we don't fully understand, neither am I narrow minded to think it can only be spiritual.

There was a similar episode before the one I described in the OP, it also happened after she went for a walk at night. So I have resolved not to allow her go outside alone after dark.

Things are really happening.i am glad you noticed all these,some men don't even have time to notice any changes in their wives.

I'm glad you have resolved in your heart to stand by her through it all... I pray you get a lasting solution to the headaches.

ahnie:
Things are really happening.i am glad you noticed all these,some men don't even have time to notice any changes in their wives.

Thanks to the corona and working from home some people get to know things about their partners they didn't previously know

You need to see a psychiatrist. It's not something you can handle.

By the way, the symptoms have always been there, start paying more attention to your wife as you're not even sure whether she's on Nairaland or not.

Acidosis:


You need to see a psychiatrist. It's not something you can handle.

Do we have those kind of therapist in 9ja?

Saifullah01:

Do we have those kind of therapist in 9ja?

Yeah, any secondary or tertiary hospital.

I dey fear ojuju

@mindlog

This isn't split personality as I know it to be but your wife may have undiagnosed mental health issues, especially that headache, it's a sign that she should see a professional.

Saifullah01:

Thanks to the corona and working from home some people get to know things about their partners they didn't previously know

Op is a real nigga,the only time my husband notices me is when I am pressing phones.thats if the nigga has called me more than twice and no response

ahnie:
Things are really happening.i am glad you noticed all these,some men don't even have time to notice any changes in their wives.

OP @myglodata there are various things that could be happening to her. You really need to do some research and get medical help. She could be showing early signs of schizophrenia, Alzheimer’s or dementia related illnesses.

Whatever it is, I would advise you to start doing A LOT of research to figure out clues, people and places you could get help from. Don’t forget to start a diary with notes of everything that happens including incidents, dates, behaviors, symptoms, medical history including those of family and relatives etc. These will help you make connections and be able to tell the whole story to professionals when needed.

ahnie:

Op is a real nigga,the only time my husband notices me is when I am pressing phones.thats if the nigga has called me more than twice and no response

Don’t own the derogatory words colonials used to refer to your ancestors.

Richy4:

That's the raw truth.

ahnie:

That's the raw truth.

.

You need to take her to the psychiatric hospital fast, so that it won't be out of control....

Expert needs to study her behaviour for some days or month, if it needs better diagnosis or drug...

Wish her Gods healing

Let her see a psychiatrist.

They might place her on routine drug but she will be fine.

myglodata:
I just want to read about other people's experience. I might not be able to describe the phenomenon, but I'll try (bear with me)

We have been married for over a decade now with kids. Like all human interactions (marriage not excluded) we've had our problems but we always manage to resolve it (patience is key - an advice to married couples).

About 3 week ago after one of our usual argument (over some flimsy issue). She walked to me told me we need to talk. She said, and I paraphrase; "If we keep on arguing like this my love for you will keep reducing, and I'll only be staying with you for the kids". She then left for the room. After some few minutes she called me on phone and said "come and take me out" (this was around mid night). She then started crying and complaining of severe headache. She said she wants to go out for a walk at midnight, and crying and acting wired. She loves playing the Qur'an from her phone but at this point she asked me to take it far away from her and lots of other drama.

After about 30 to 40 mins she snapped out of it, her tone changed and she asked me "what are you doing here, are you not coming to bed". As if nothing happened, and when I told her about the incident and our discussions (about the kids and our love) she had absolutely no recollection of it whatsoever (even though it happened just moments ago). She just said she is having severe headaches. I could sense she was visibly disturbed when I told her because she hates any form of mental illness attributed to her.

Recently we travelled and she slept in my sisters place. In the morning she told me she had those severe headaches again and almost called me to come get her in the middle of the night because she was terrified and didn't want to snap into that state again and end up embarrassing her self at my sisters house.

Looking back at some fights we've had over the years couldn't help but think could it be that "she wasn't the one" I've been having these arguments with, but I only start noticing recently?

She normally gets into this state when she's angry (so I try to avoid getting her angry - but its quite hard)

She told me that recently she's been having some wired and fetish urges (even though I have known her to be a good woman)

I don't know if this make sense. I have always thought this kind of things (splits, possession etc.) happened to pretty women (and my wife falls in this category).

I am not the superstitious type and have resolved to stand by her, no one knows about this and I intend to keep it like this as long as it is not beyond our control. But I just want to here from people out there with similar experience

N.B I hope she's not on NL

yes my cousin had split personality phase one time in her life, everybody was saying spiritual, but I was the only one who was able to understand what she was going through,

Sometimes she will insult the hell out of you for nothing.

Then the next minute she will come to her senses and won't remember what she said,

She will dress up for party, and won't put on makeup, then when they get to the party she will remember, and go back home, eventually not going back to the party because she's too ashamed of the embarrassment, we managed the phase for like 1year that way.

She has now snapped out of it

It's a medical problem with some of the symptoms she's been showing. Seek medical help.

Whatever you decide to do with her, never be deceived it's spiritual.

@lalasticlala or who ever the mod here is can we get this to FP to get other inputs.

Acidosis:
You need to see a psychiatrist. It's not something you can handle.

By the way, the symptoms have always been there, start paying more attention to your wife as you're not even sure whether she's on Nairaland or not.

Op, take this advice

@ myglodata, your wife's situation is more of an impending medical disaster if serious medical help is not sought on time. Stress is a major factor that induces these symptoms you described in your narration. I want to believe your wife falls into the categories of those who take many of their day to day activities like taking care of the kids, house chores, work, business etc too seriously. She probably finds it difficult getting to sleep on time or when she sleeps, she wakes up much earlier than necessary and then later starts feeling sleepy back around 5am - 7am- these definitely are tell tale signs of mental ill health. If your dear wife ticks some of these signs, you guys need to go to a very good hospital for proper medical evaluation of her situation and of course back every thing up with prayers (probably Rukyah since you are Muslims). Wishing your family the very best at this trying period.

drmorphine:
@ myglodata, your wife's situation is more of an impending medical disaster if serious medical help is not sought on time. Stress is a major factor that induces these symptoms you described in your narration. I want to believe your wife falls into the categories of those who take many of their day to day activities like taking care of the kids, house chores, work, business etc too seriously. She probably finds it difficult getting to sleep on time or when she sleeps, she wakes up much earlier than necessary and then later starts feeling sleepy back around 5am - 7am- these definitely are tell tale signs of mental ill health. If your dear wife ticks some of these signs, you guys need to go to a very good hospital for proper medical evaluation of her situation and of course back every thing up with prayers (probably Rukyah since you are Muslims). Wishing your family the very best at this trying period.

Hmm..

InTheCloudySky:
Kudos for being an attentive and caring husband - to have noticed all these changes in your wife. I'm impressed. Have her see a Neurologist asap. Neurologists diagnose and treat brain disorders, which is likely what she has. Your post points to the symptoms of Early-Onset Alzheimer's Disease (e.g. memory loss, headaches, disorientation in time and space, changes in mood and behavior, etc.). It can affect people in their 40s and 50s, as well as those 65+. As it's a progressive disease, the earlier it's diagnosed, the better. She needs to see a Neurologist.

Best wishes to her, and you.

Thank you.

socialmediaman:
OP @myglodata there are various things that could be happening to her. You really need to do some research and get medical help. She could be showing early signs of schizophrenia, Alzheimer’s or dementia related illnesses.

Whatever it is, I would advise you to start doing A LOT of research to figure out clues, people and places you could get help from. Don’t forget to start a diary with notes of everything that happens including incidents, dates, behaviors, symptoms, medical history including those of family and relatives etc. These will help you make connections and be able to tell the whole story to professionals when needed.

I'll surely start the documenting