MISSCONGENIALITY:
That's the problem. You got loan to start up something for her and yet you don't want to her to nurse it to grow. How will you feel if by the time you are paying of the Laon, thé business is long dead? Will you take another loan to start another business for her or you will let her seat idle at home? You are the real owner of the business, yes I agree, but don't you want your business to grow to a level where you won't even bother if your salary doesn't come for months?
How grateful do you want her to be if not by bothering about the growth of the business you started for her?
I understand that things are hard and you may have no choice than to eat from the business because na person wey eat dey run business, but don't you think she will feel bad that most of the shelves that were filled up before are now empty because there's no more money to fill them?
If your plan is for it to Crash so that you can collect another Laon, then it's okay. You own the business you know how you want it to go.
However, if you took loan, started a business just to eat off it, it's still okay. Maybe you should just send your wife to acquire a skill so that while the business is running down, she will be learning something.
As for her being jobless when you married her, you saw her like that and liked her and went ahead to marry her despite her joblessness and even after the marriage, you went ahead to look for baby instead of sending her to acquire a skill or starting a business. It was untill she became depressed from staying at home alone all day and yet no child to keep her busy that you thought of starting off a business for her..so don't bring her joblessness before marriage into it. Maybe you have even used it against her several times and her new behavior could be a reaction to the emotional torture you give her. Marry person wey get something doing, una the.too dey proud or too opinionated, now you are torturing a woman simply because she was jobless when you married her and now started a business for her.

distinguish:
We have been married for a year now. We have been trying to conceive. Because of the emotional stress attached my wife said she can't be staying at home alone, it causes her stress. She said she wants to start doing something. At least a business.

I took a loan from my place of work and we started the business for over 2 months now. The issue now is that, I don't always have cash on me anymore. Any little money I got it's for the business. Basically, we mostly feed from the business.

Yesterday, after we returned home, she started giving me attitude, I asked her what the issue was, she started telling me how I am killing the business, not taking good care of her, not having money to take care of her and all sort of rubbish, she brought out how incompetent I am as a husband and what have you. I never said a word to reply her and its eating me up seriously, I could not sleep the whole night. This is the person that I sacrificed a lot for. I was supposed a take a professional course this November, but because of her I had to postpone it.

Please I need your advice.

PS: I did not eat the food she prepared last night.

uuzba:

The woman who married the man knows him better than any of us.
Most times they are looking at the man's attitude.
Personally this money come, money go business is controlled by God himself.
He will just personally mess you up and take away your money
JUST FOR THE SAKE TO SEE HOW YOU WILL BEHAVE without money.
Like the story of Job in the Bible.
An honest man will remain closer to God and his wife will see it.
A fake man will get angry and betray God and his wife will see it.
When the money comes back later, the woman has now known EXACTLY the kind of character the man has.

uuzba:

The woman who married the man knows him better than any of us.
Most times they are looking at the man's attitude.
Personally this money come, money go business is controlled by God himself.
He will just personally mess you up and take away your money
JUST FOR THE SAKE TO SEE HOW YOU WILL BEHAVE without money.
Like the story of Job in the Bible.
An honest man will remain closer to God and his wife will see it.
A fake man will get angry and betray God and his wife will see it.
When the money comes back later, the woman has now known EXACTLY the kind of character the man has.

Davash222:

A man will kneel and beg a woman to marry him
Same man will still pay bride price
Same man will still train and set up the woman

Just for procreation


We need to revisit and readjust some ethics in this institution called marriage.

uuzba:

The woman who married the man knows him better than any of us.
Most times they are looking at the man's attitude.
Personally this money come, money go business is controlled by God himself.
He will just personally mess you up and take away your money
JUST FOR THE SAKE TO SEE HOW YOU WILL BEHAVE without money.
Like the story of Job in the Bible.
An honest man will remain closer to God and his wife will see it.
A fake man will get angry and betray God and his wife will see it.
When the money comes back later, the woman has now known EXACTLY the kind of character the man has.

distinguish:
We have been married for a year now. We have been trying to conceive. Because of the emotional stress attached my wife said she can't be staying at home alone, it causes her stress. She said she wants to start doing something. At least a business.

I took a loan from my place of work and we started the business for over 2 months now. The issue now is that, I don't always have cash on me anymore. Any little money I got it's for the business. Basically, we mostly feed from the business.

Yesterday, after we returned home, she started giving me attitude, I asked her what the issue was, she started telling me how I am killing the business, not taking good care of her, not having money to take care of her and all sort of rubbish, she brought out how incompetent I am as a husband and what have you. I never said a word to reply her and its eating me up seriously, I could not sleep the whole night. This is the person that I sacrificed a lot for. I was supposed a take a professional course this November, but because of her I had to postpone it.

Please I need your advice.

PS: I did not eat the food she prepared last night.

distinguish:
We have been married for a year now. We have been trying to conceive. Because of the emotional stress attached my wife said she can't be staying at home alone, it causes her stress. She said she wants to start doing something. At least a business.

I took a loan from my place of work and we started the business for over 2 months now. The issue now is that, I don't always have cash on me anymore. Any little money I got it's for the business. Basically, we mostly feed from the business.

Yesterday, after we returned home, she started giving me attitude, I asked her what the issue was, she started telling me how I am killing the business, not taking good care of her, not having money to take care of her and all sort of rubbish, she brought out how incompetent I am as a husband and what have you. I never said a word to reply her and its eating me up seriously, I could not sleep the whole night. This is the person that I sacrificed a lot for. I was supposed a take a professional course this November, but because of her I had to postpone it.

Please I need your advice.

PS: I did not eat the food she prepared last night.

distinguish:
We have been married for a year now. We have been trying to conceive. Because of the emotional stress attached my wife said she can't be staying at home alone, it causes her stress. She said she wants to start doing something. At least a business.

I took a loan from my place of work and we started the business for over 2 months now. The issue now is that, I don't always have cash on me anymore. Any little money I got it's for the business. Basically, we mostly feed from the business.

Yesterday, after we returned home, she started giving me attitude, I asked her what the issue was, she started telling me how I am killing the business, not taking good care of her, not having money to take care of her and all sort of rubbish, she brought out how incompetent I am as a husband and what have you. I never said a word to reply her and its eating me up seriously, I could not sleep the whole night. This is the person that I sacrificed a lot for. I was supposed a take a professional course this November, but because of her I had to postpone it.

Please I need your advice.

PS: I did not eat the food she prepared last night.

otokx:
Welcome to the Nigerian husband world, it will get worse then it may get better, just hang in there.

Davash222:

A man will kneel and beg a woman to marry him
Same man will still pay bride price
Same man will still train and set up the woman

Just for procreation


We need to revisit and readjust some ethics in this institution called marriage.

Haakeem:
Your wife must be from igbo or yoruba tribe ah most of them can't bere it with their husband,but once GOD accepts prayer and the husband got visa and flew out from the country without taking his wife, those type of wives would be the one ranting that they were with you when everything was hard,you were with me what?.....my advise is that you continue refusing her food till you faint off

millionboi:
ah which kind advice is this?

silvoclaira:
@Op I feel for you and the family. Things are really expensive out here and money nor reach.

https://www.nairaland.com/6853192/inflation-women-please-pity-husbands

Please just take it easy on your wife. The pressure on you is the same kind of pressure on her too.

Things are really hard this times in Nigeria, so we only have to be patient and try absorbing all the shocks okay.

I believe you are a good man, your wife is a good woman.

If She is into business which is a daily thing so, she should know how tough things are today and you both can work it out better. You both should have a honest discussion of what is on ground today.

Lastly try and be in your best mind and shape, eat food. Take care of yourself and be healthy.

Bola146:
Wahala in marriages especially when the foundation is faulty I'll never advise a idle lady to go into marriage, she must have something little to support her husband at home, she should learn a handiwork or business, instead of spending much on wedding, they can use it for her to start a business and do a low key wedding. If she can't understand your financial condition as an adult and how Nigeria economy is so bad now, I don't know what else she needs. Emotionally she might be disturbed for infertility.

distinguish:
We have been married for a year now. We have been trying to conceive. Because of the emotional stress attached my wife said she can't be staying at home alone, it causes her stress. She said she wants to start doing something. At least a business.

I took a loan from my place of work and we started the business for over 2 months now. The issue now is that, I don't always have cash on me anymore. Any little money I got it's for the business. Basically, we mostly feed from the business.

Yesterday, after we returned home, she started giving me attitude, I asked her what the issue was, she started telling me how I am killing the business, not taking good care of her, not having money to take care of her and all sort of rubbish, she brought out how incompetent I am as a husband and what have you. I never said a word to reply her and its eating me up seriously, I could not sleep the whole night. This is the person that I sacrificed a lot for. I was supposed a take a professional course this November, but because of her I had to postpone it.

Please I need your advice.

PS: I did not eat the food she prepared last night.

distinguish:
We have been married for a year now. We have been trying to conceive. Because of the emotional stress attached my wife said she can't be staying at home alone, it causes her stress. She said she wants to start doing something. At least a business.

I took a loan from my place of work and we started the business for over 2 months now. The issue now is that, I don't always have cash on me anymore. Any little money I got it's for the business. Basically, we mostly feed from the business.

Yesterday, after we returned home, she started giving me attitude, I asked her what the issue was, she started telling me how I am killing the business, not taking good care of her, not having money to take care of her and all sort of rubbish, she brought out how incompetent I am as a husband and what have you. I never said a word to reply her and its eating me up seriously, I could not sleep the whole night. This is the person that I sacrificed a lot for. I was supposed a take a professional course this November, but because of her I had to postpone it.

Please I need your advice.

PS: I did not eat the food she prepared last night.

BarrElChapo:


A business that the man took a loan for and is repaying+interest from his salary account every month.

Where do you expect the man to feed from in the interim ? Another loan. Okay the man isn't feeling the pinch in his finances, what if the woman got the loan herself she can never repay the loan from that business right.

I don't know what to say to you cos your heart is one meant for beasts.