Good day everyone
I’m not good at writing so pls bear with me anyhow you see this.
I’m a young man 24yrs old and my girlfriend 22, I just finished my undergraduate studies and about going for Nysc, While my girl is still in school but she’s already into some online business making good and enough money for herself money that ordinarily she can use to start up a good life. She does not know how to spend which I have complained severally, I don’t really blame her due to the fact that she gets money at any given time she needs it. She can be paid 100k today and be broke in next 3 days calling me and disturbing me for recharge card and all sort of things she can actually do herself. I normally give this to her but it’s now becoming worse and unbearable no matter the amount she gets, she’ll spend it for you in less than one week with no reasonable thing to show for and you’ll be amazed.

To cut it all short, I’m still unemployed but I normally do some little jobs that brings me cash just change compared to what my girl makes in a month. Let me add that she’s a very supportive girl, helped me during my school when I had issues.

I’ve talked and talked now she tags me a nagging guy, and that I have poverty mentality by telling her to have some savings not for me but for herself

I’m just tried and cos she’s not changing keeps doing same thing
I’m even scared of taking the relationship to the next stage.
Cos if things fall out for her
I’ll be the one to take care of her excessive and exorbitant spendings. And I’m just a guy who’s starting life

Pls I need advise

Bros , the foundation of every good relationship begins and ends when both parties see and accept things from the other person's point of view .

So try and make her see things from your perspective by highlighting the pros and cons of her spending habits . But if she's adamant, kindly walk out of the relationship and save yourself the horrors of living with someone who's unbending.

After all, a woman who's used to living extravagantly isn't someone worth marrying and raising children with.

Teach her how to save and manage her money more wisely. With the right knowledge and tools, she will change.

Ammishaddai:
Bros , the foundation of every good relationship begins and ends when both parties see and accept things from the other person's point of view .

So try and make her see things from your perspective by highlighting the pros and cons of her spending habits . But if she's adamant, kindly walk out of the relationship and save yourself the horrors of living with someone who's unbending.

After all, a woman who's used to living extravagantly isn't someone worth marrying and raising children with.

Pay attention to this advice OP...

Ammishaddai:
Bros , the foundation of every good relationship begins and ends when both parties see and accept things from the other person's point of view .

So try and make her see things from your perspective by highlighting the pros and cons of her spending habits . But if she's adamant, kindly walk out of the relationship and save yourself the horrors of living with someone who's unbending.

After all, a woman who's used to living
extravagantly isn't someone worth marrying and raising children with.

Thanks for your comment

She isn’t that extravagant in spending like buying luxuries.
She just spends unwisely and don’t plan for important things
Like at the end of the day she won’t be able to even account what and what the money was spent on

Guy, you gotta teach your woman how to save.

nextBIGthing:




Thanks for your comment

She isn’t that extravagant in spending like buying luxuries.
She just spends unwisely and don’t plan for important things
Like at the end of the day she won’t be able to even account what and what the money was spent on

I've already answered that in my last post

mikigen:
OP they are telling you now you are defending her.
She isn't financially disciplined my guy and I see that you are even too young to control that girl she won't and can't respect you Atleast not for now so how do u intend to make her change when she doesn't even listen to you?

You are a still young, I will advice you face your life and do the little you can to make her see reasons to adjust her lifestyle if you don't notice any changes then let her be even this relationship stuff you are doing now at this your age is not the best for you cos u need to focus and build your life.

Thanks for ur advise sir

take out time to tell her your needs..

invent some needs and table them before her, just tell her you feel like letting her know some things about you..

please, don't ask her for cash ooo and don't agree to collect even if she offer to give you.


If her reaction doesn't change, then she is trying to meet a particular standard and she will pull you down

You can let her spend her money, don't let her exploit you with her extravagance.

I want to get involved with an online biz, may I know the one your gf is into.

O boy no le, she's paying another guys school fees

nextBIGthing:




Thanks for your comment

She isn’t that extravagant in spending like buying luxuries.
She just spends unwisely and don’t plan for important things
Like at the end of the day she won’t be able to even account what and what the money was spent on

You seem to be defending her, how does a 22 year old spend 100k in a week and can't account for what she spend on and you say she is not extravagant, anyways...like you mentioned, you are a young man just starting life, the last thing you need now is a gf being a burden financially when the money stops coming to her as frequently

nextBIGthing:
Good day everyone
I’m not good at writing so pls bear with me anyhow you see this.
I’m a young man 24yrs old and my girlfriend 22, I just finished my undergraduate studies and about going for Nysc, While my girl is still in school but she’s already into some online business making good and enough money for herself money that ordinarily she can use to start up a good life. She does not know how to spend which I have complained severally, I don’t really blame her due to the fact that she gets money at any given time she needs it. She can be paid 100k today and be broke in next 3 days calling me and disturbing me for recharge card and all sort of things she can actually do herself. I normally give this to her but it’s now becoming worse and unbearable no matter the amount she gets, she’ll spend it for you in less than one week with no reasonable thing to show for and you’ll be amazed.

To cut it all short, I’m still unemployed but I normally do some little jobs that brings me cash just change compared to what my girl makes in a month. Let me add that she’s a very supportive girl, helped me during my school when I had issues.

I’ve talked and talked now she tags me a nagging guy, and that I have poverty mentality by telling her to have some savings not for me but for herself

I’m just tried and cos she’s not changing keeps doing same thing
I’m even scared of taking the relationship to the next stage.
Cos if things fall out for her
I’ll be the one to take care of her excessive and exorbitant spendings. And I’m just a guy who’s starting life

Pls I need advise

She looks like a girl that loves the good life and is ready to put up with the hustle..but as her guy you need to continue to make her see reasons why she should not just save but diversify. And you need to upgrade your own hustle too. Help her be better even though it can be hard cos most ladies dont think they simply act.

nextBIGthing:
Good day everyone
I’m not good at writing so pls bear with me anyhow you see this.
I’m a young man 24yrs old and my girlfriend 22, I just finished my undergraduate studies and about going for Nysc, While my girl is still in school but she’s already into some online business making good and enough money for herself money that ordinarily she can use to start up a good life. She does not know how to spend which I have complained severally, I






don’t really blame her due to the fact that she gets money at any given time she needs it. She can be paid 100k today and be broke in next 3 days calling me and disturbing me for recharge card and all sort of things she can actually do herself. I normally give this to her but it’s now becoming worse and unbearable no matter the amount she gets, she’ll spend it for you in less than one week with no reasonable thing to show for and you’ll be amazed.

To cut it all short, I’m still unemployed but I normally do some little jobs that brings me cash just change compared to what my girl makes in a month. Let me add that she’s a very supportive girl, helped me during my school when I had issues.

I’ve talked and talked now she tags me a nagging guy, and that I have poverty mentality by telling her to have some savings not for me but for herself

I’m just tried and cos she’s not changing keeps doing same thing
I’m even scared of taking the relationship to the next stage.
Cos if things fall out for her
I’ll be the one to take care of her excessive and exorbitant spendings. And I’m just a guy who’s starting life

Pls I need advise

Guy, it is no big deal if she spends extravagantly, as a guy you must be wise and make sure you know the kind of girl she is.
The question is how can you allow a girl you love to be spending without nothing to show for it , it actually reveals the foundation of your relationship.
My advise get money from her , and help her do what she cannot do with her money. Trust you me when things goes out of hand for hand, then you will deliver on how you have been helping her do what she can't do.

Except you too is not trustworthy when it comes to money.
Do this and save yourself from unnecessary future stress and brain draining thought.

I think you should stop rescuing her. Just say no and tell her you're struggling and can't meet her needs. Once she is broke and hungry she will learn. If you're always there to help her then she'll never feel the consequences of her actions.

Ammishaddai:
Bros , the foundation of every good relationship begins and ends when both parties see and accept things from the other person's point of view .

So try and make her see things from your perspective by highlighting the pros and cons of her spending habits . But if she's adamant, kindly walk out of the relationship and save yourself the horrors of living with someone who's unbending.

After all, a woman who's used to living extravagantly isn't someone worth marrying and raising children with.

Read again you will see where he mentioned that he have talk about it with her many times but she won't change. Do you think sitting her down again will change anything? She even see him as nagging bf. For me he should focus on his life because not every relationship end in marriage

nextBIGthing:




Thanks for your comment

She isn’t that extravagant in spending like buying luxuries.
She just spends unwisely and don’t plan for important things
Like at the end of the day she won’t be able to even account what and what the money was spent on

That's still a big problem. Think about future before committing to this kind woman, I'm not saying she's a bad woman but if things turn South during Marriage , how will she handled it

Bennysam:

Read again you will see where he mentioned that he have talk about it with her many times but she won't change. Do you think sitting her down again will change anything? She even see him as nagging bf. For me he should focus on his life because not every relationship end in marriage

My bros, I already read his post and I am aware that he already talked with his girlfriend about this before. However, the way he presented his case made me emphasize on him"sitting her down " and having a heart-to-heart talk that is serious and means business .

You suggesting that he should leave her and focus on his life does not sound right. Why? Because he loves this girl and he wants the best for her. Calling it quits before trying all the possible options of reconciliation is certainly not the proper way to handle things .

Ammishaddai:
Bros , the foundation of every good relationship begins and ends when both parties see and accept things from the other person's point of view .

So try and make her see things from your perspective by highlighting the pros and cons of her spending habits . But if she's adamant, kindly walk out of the relationship and save yourself the horrors of living with someone who's unbending.

After all, a woman who's used to living extravagantly isn't someone worth marrying and raising children with.

@ nextBIGthing, listen to this advice up there. Your fears and concerns are valid. That's how a responsible person should reason. If she's adamant, leave her alone.

Ammishaddai:
My bros, I already read his post and I am aware that he already talked with his girlfriend about this before. However, the way he presented his case made me emphasize on him"sitting her down " and having a heart-to-heart talk that is serious and means business .

You suggesting that he should leave her and focus on his life does not sound right. Why? Because he loves this girl and he wants the best for her. Calling it quits before trying all the possible options of reconciliation is certainly not the proper way to handle things .

You misunderstood me, i didn't advice him to leave her entirely but he should stop disturbing her about how she spend her money and focus on himself , make his own money

Bennysam:

You misunderstood me, i didn't advice him to leave her entirely but he should stop disturbing her about how she spend her money and focus on himself , make his own money

...but he wants to build a future with her ,and she probably wants the same too. And that's why he came to this forum to seek advise regarding his relationship

Relation palaver.. Am out.

Na you go teach her how to save.

Let her start with 5%. She should put her savings in an account which has no ATM card. As time goes on she can change it to 10%.

She must remove the savings immediately money enters her account.

Una de advice op. Op de defend babe. Should I tell him?

Different people with different issues.
Facilitate learning on Financial education for her. You may not be the one that will directly teach her that is why I said facilitate the learning process. Use her point of interest, is it books, movies or songs, use that particular one that teaches it and follow through, let her learn through it.

AfroKnight:
Na you go teach her how to save.

Let her start with 5%. She should put her savings in an account which has no ATM card. As time goes on she can change it to 10%.

She must remove the savings immediately money enters her account.

Have tried this technique countless times but it just doesn’t work out
I’ve even tried to take money from her and keep in my personal account...but when she needs the money she always know how to get it back

Light up a blunt listening to your tales, won't want to trade places with you. He don be for you.

nextBIGthing:


Have tried this technique countless times but it just doesn’t work out
I’ve even tried to take money from her and keep in my personal account...but when she needs the money she always know how to get it back

Keep on tarrying with her, it's your birthright to be with her, she'll take all the advice you've given her today... Then we'll coman chop rice very soon

Why hasn't anyone asked what job your girl is doing online??
You sure say no be runs she dey do??

Sha take some of the advice given above and reason with her,if she can't be reasoned with then start looking for ways to dismiss her.

---

She may be a good person but that spendthrift nature of hers could land both of you in the gutter.

Your babe is an online vendor, a cover for runs. She is extravagant cos she knows maga go pay again tomorrow. Toto no dey finish. I'm an OG, what you read is the blunt truth.