Personally I don't think it is right. It might mean nothing to her but alot to you, it's something you should discuss with her and you both will certainly reach an understanding

So some people would answer this question Wahala �

For the husband to notice this and be worried about this and make it a subject of discourse on social media, I sincerely think the husband is immature and insecure.

Tomorrow, it will be "should my wife kneels to greet her elder brother when all she does is hugs me".

God, anytime I want to marry, don't give me a woman that makes every simple and irrelevant thing an issue.

Perfecttouch:
this your comment doesn't make sense..
She for marry the brother now..

Why can't she just set the table and everyone comes to eat at once?
Why make the husband inferior in his own house?

As in, the phrase "in my own house dey burst my brain".

God bless you Son! You saved the day. Women are autonomous and do many things without introspection. The situation with your parents is a strong case of compatibility.

BMathew:
This situation is very rude oh, you won't understand until you're married.
I was oppotuned to have similar experience while am still with my parents back then. That thing really hurts my dad and he wasn't a man of much word.

My mum senior brother came and my dad invited him to the family dinning table instead of using the visitor's room. It seems my dad was very famished and that triggers the dinner to be prepared before time.
Then my mom served the visitor first and I took the food from the kitchen, I was placing the tray on the table and my dad approached it, I told him it wasn't for you but for the visitor sir...."He said politely ooookay oh and stylishly looking or something and he left the dinning to his room and sigh hmm uuh.
When I noticed that, I told my mum what I saw and he said he would take the food to him herself. He took the food to him in his bedroom and after some minutes my mom brought the food out for him to eat on the dinning and it was settled. The following morning, the dinning were already set for my dad and the visitor before they call them for their breakfast.

It means so much and I learnt big from that scene that day.
Don't mind people bashing you cus they don't know what they're saying.
Politely call your wife and tell her how you feel about that and If you can't call her kindly drop a message for her cus if you didn't address it it would take the anger to another level and you could start hating her brother for that same reason.
Glad you're a man of understanding.

You just dey look for trouble where trouble no dey

SayAsSeen:
Hello friends, I'd like to ask intelligent and older minds for advise about an issue before I react.

My wife's elder brother is visiting my house and my wife has been serving his food first before serving and bringing my good, in my own house.


Please I just want to ask if this is wrong or right or even just normal?

I worked all through the night and was famished by the time the day broke this morning. I gave her some dough and told her to prepare me noodles and sardine, emphasizing on the fact that I was very hungry.

NOTE: Her Brother was still asleep at this time.

She prepared the meal, split it into two. Woke up and served her brother first in my guest room before coming to my room to give her hungry husband his food.

I was so mad, I ignored the food, went out to smoke a cigarette. While I was doing that it occured to me ask for advice here, because I didn't want to ask anybody I knew personally.

I still don't know whether to be mad, or to just ignore it.

I am a strong believer of common sense and respect and her actions this morning lack both! It would have take her less than 30 seconds to give me my food then go wake and serve her brother!

Is she told me she needed money for something and I put my younger sister's need over her's-no matter how tribal her's might be-i know how she'd react and the amount of making up I'd have to do.

I am trying to be very mature about this, that's why I keeping things anonymous?

Besides I'd like to know, I possibly can't be the only person who has experienced this sort of situation because they say there's nothing new under the sun. Please who has ever felt this way, I am very understanding and if something irks me, it would irk every body else too.


Wish I could explain better

DICKstractor:



Why's everything becoming a problem to this new generation marriage


From the look of things, I don't think the next 5-10 generation can handle marriage


One day your wife go mess, you go say the mess smells so unfamiliar. That it is not from the kind of food you guys eat at home. Meaning, she's cheating

#spits

The thing weak me ohhh......seems alot of pple are not ready for marriage......was trying to digest what i just read b4 i saw ur comment.....May God help us

/
I don't see anything wrong in that.

As long as you refuse to be a man in your house, your wife has every right to use you as a door mat.

/

Are u a human being at all. You should not respond to the comments cos u know say u f**k up. You need a rehabilitation before getting married

ignis:


It takes an idiot to recognize one.

chatinent:
The way men pick on irrelevant things these days now amuse me.

About the part you said her bro was asleep and she woke him up to serve him, it smells a bag full of lies said to solidify your points.

It's funny how you think his point is irrelevant but conveniently claimed he is lying about the part you feel might be an issue...stop being a hypocrite.

BullyBullies:



God bless you for your rational contribution. How can your husband be hungry and he gave you money 6o make him food, and you made the good but went to serve your sleeping brother first before going to serve your starving husband who worked through the night? That's a big disrespect. Sometimes many people that comment don't think on their own, they form their judgment based in what is popular in the comment section. Only few people on the social media give judgment independently regardless of popular opinion.

Noooooo, not giving opinion base on popular but that how 75% of Nigerians reason irrationally and that give credence to how naija turn to banana republic.

Bro you've lost the man in you if your wife served her brother before giving you food in your own house....


Even in a social gathering a wife who knew her onions must first give her husband food before any fuccking body...


Yoruba women get respect die for their husbands

Well,, u & ur visitor r important & both of u need to be treated with respect..
My mum serves my dad food in his room. But when ever there's family around, she serves the food on the dining table and calls both parties to the table to eat.. She actually puts the food on a big dish & let's both parties serve them self to create that unity between them..

Pataricatering:
oga , I'm married and I do exactly the same thing - I serve guests first - my husband is not disabled that he can't enter kitchen and dish out his own food if necessary.
There is nothing I detest like ego driven decisions - they usually lack sense and they open the door for entitlement and further unreasonable behaviour.

First...
OP made some modifications to his thread, I think you need to read that first so as to have the full picture of things and gain proper understanding...

Secondly...
It is plain disrespect to put the needs of guest over your spouse (husband/wife) when he/she have frowned at it several times... It shows that you undermine their feelings and that could bring contempt and this has NOTHING at all to do with ego...

If your spouse frowns at something, common sense should tell you to atleast, consider what they're saying and change were possible, not to adamantly cling on to a habit even when it's clearly causing issues in your marriage...

Family comes first...
Those guests you're putting above your spouse will go and then you will have to deal with your spouse's displeasure (if any)...
When I was much younger...
My mum has NEVER served a guest food first when my dad was around, and this was not because she was scared of dad or something, buh it was one of her ways of telling him "I value you above all else"...

But tis your family sha...
Do whatever works you ...

A lot of kids are here bashing the guy.


If the guy did that for his mum or sis ..they would have bashed him.

He has a point. Men are driven by ego and he damn has every right to give treated as the most important person in his house. He is the crown of the woman and shouldn't be given second level treatment. All I will advise is that you tell her calmly, perhaps playfully that you didn't like that....then move on and never mention it again


All the best.

Pataricatering:
oga , I'm married and I do exactly the same thing - I serve guests first - my husband is not disabled that he can't enter kitchen and dish out his own food if necessary.
There is nothing I detest like ego driven decisions - they usually lack sense and they open the door for entitlement and further unreasonable behaviour.

So you can walk to the kitchen for guests and say your husband is not disabled to serve himself

Men are in bondage these days.

Treepower2000:

I can see why Nigeria is where we are today.
No rational thinking.
The man pointed out that he told his wife that he was hungry and wife's brother still sleeping.
What's the rational of waking up someone in bed to serve him food before someone awake and hungry because he is a guest.
The so called brother in-law have outstayed his welcome and should therefore go back home.
After a week in another person's house you should not expect to be treated as a guest because you have become part of the household and should expect no special treatment.
Respect is reciprocal.

Indomie generation would not understand!

SayAsSeen:


This is the umpteenth time! Since he arrived

You should have said something the first time she did it.
I know how you fell. Talking to her is your only option sir.
She obviously doesn’t see it as a bad thing.

as a guest visiting or living with u?is he a senior or junior brother?u cant eat before ur guest especially if he is ur wife senior brother.it culd be dfft if he is a kidbro!IS THAT CLEAR TO YOU SIR,OGA LANDLORD?GOODLUCK!

It's something you can Talk over with her.
She may reason that since her Brother is a visitor,she Will attend to him First.

SayAsSeen:
Hello friends, I'd like to ask intelligent and older minds for advise about an issue before I react.

My wife's elder brother is visiting my house and my wife has been serving his food first before serving and bringing my good, in my own house.


Please I just want to ask if this is wrong or right or even just normal?

I worked all through the night and was famished by the time the day broke this morning. I gave her some dough and told her to prepare me noodles and sardine, emphasizing on the fact that I was very hungry.

NOTE: Her Brother was still asleep at this time.

She prepared the meal, split it into two. Woke up and served her brother first in my guest room before coming to my room to give her hungry husband his food.

I was so mad, I ignored the food, went out to smoke a cigarette. While I was doing that it occured to me ask for advice here, because I didn't want to ask anybody I knew personally.

I still don't know whether to be mad, or to just ignore it.

I am a strong believer of common sense and respect and her actions this morning lack both! It would have take her less than 30 seconds to give me my food then go wake and serve her brother!

Is she told me she needed money for something and I put my younger sister's need over her's-no matter how tribal her's might be-i know how she'd react and the amount of making up I'd have to do.

I am trying to be very mature about this, that's why I keeping things anonymous?

Besides I'd like to know, I possibly can't be the only person who has experienced this sort of situation because they say there's nothing new under the sun. Please who has ever felt this way, I am very understanding and if something irks me, it would irk every body else too.


Wish I could explain better

It is not right.

Just tell ur wife u prefer being served first which is your right.

mardis:
Op, forget all those saying, there is nothing wrong in it. Infact everything is wrong with it. I am very sure majority of them aren't married so they don't see it they way you are seeing it. If it was her parents i would understand. Her brother stay your house shouldn't exeed 3days, he should go stay in a hotel. Culture and tradition permit a wife to serve her husband first before others. It is respect. The brother should even be the one to correct that.
Please talk to her, just do it in a calm way, so she can understand and correct herself.

Can't imagine staying in an in-law home beyond a day!

Man up. Tell her you are not cool with it. If u keep harbouring this feeling u may explode someday.

tundeloveday:
Are u a human being at all. You should not respond to the comments cos u know say u f**k up. You need a rehabilitation before getting married

Tell you mum to come and rehabilitate me.

tundeloveday:
You are crazy for this statement

It takes a crazy person to know one.

God1000:
I'm scared of getting married due to heartbreaking stories we read these days, some people are just in hell.

99% of Nigeria's indomie women generation are not wife material!

SayAsSeen:


This is the umpteenth time! Since he arrived

Really this is your problem in life?
Have you tot of your brother in law as a visitor?
Your brother in law is prolly older than your gf and yourself.
... But why don't you and your Gf eat together?


Oga smoke your joint and go indoors...

Gloriagee:
I serve guests first, spouse next and me, last . Anything wey remain dey ok.
...walahhi, u dey worry.

The guest have stayed 8days and is no longer a guest!

SayAsSeen:
Hello friends, I'd like to ask intelligent and older minds for advise about an issue before I react.

My wife's elder brother is visiting my house and my wife has been serving his food first before serving and bringing my good, in my own house.


Please I just want to ask if this is wrong or right or even just normal?

I worked all through the night and was famished by the time the day broke this morning. I gave her some dough and told her to prepare me noodles and sardine, emphasizing on the fact that I was very hungry.

NOTE: Her Brother was still asleep at this time.

She prepared the meal, split it into two. Woke up and served her brother first in my guest room before coming to my room to give her hungry husband his food.

I was so mad, I ignored the food, went out to smoke a cigarette. While I was doing that it occured to me ask for advice here, because I didn't want to ask anybody I knew personally.

I still don't know whether to be mad, or to just ignore it.

I am a strong believer of common sense and respect and her actions this morning lack both! It would have take her less than 30 seconds to give me my food then go wake and serve her brother!

Is she told me she needed money for something and I put my younger sister's need over her's-no matter how tribal her's might be-i know how she'd react and the amount of making up I'd have to do.

I am trying to be very mature about this, that's why I keeping things anonymous?

Besides I'd like to know, I possibly can't be the only person who has experienced this sort of situation because they say there's nothing new under the sun. Please who has ever felt this way, I am very understanding and if something irks me, it would irk every body else too.


Wish I could explain better

Now it is really obvious that these MEN are the reasons behind many of the problems couples face in their homes. Just this morning, another married man came here to cry, this evening another married man is crying on an irrelevant issue.

So, if it was her father that came to visit and she served her father food first before you, you would continue crying like this?

Eeei God, Please many of these Men need wisdom.

SayAsSeen:
Hello friends, I'd like to ask intelligent and older minds for advise about an issue before I react.

My wife's elder brother is visiting my house and my wife has been serving his food first before serving and bringing my good, in my own house.


Please I just want to ask if this is wrong or right or even just normal?

I worked all through the night and was famished by the time the day broke this morning. I gave her some dough and told her to prepare me noodles and sardine, emphasizing on the fact that I was very hungry.

NOTE: Her Brother was still asleep at this time.

She prepared the meal, split it into two. Woke up and served her brother first in my guest room before coming to my room to give her hungry husband his food.

I was so mad, I ignored the food, went out to smoke a cigarette. While I was doing that it occured to me ask for advice here, because I didn't want to ask anybody I knew personally.

I still don't know whether to be mad, or to just ignore it.

I am a strong believer of common sense and respect and her actions this morning lack both! It would have take her less than 30 seconds to give me my food then go wake and serve her brother!

Is she told me she needed money for something and I put my younger sister's need over her's-no matter how tribal her's might be-i know how she'd react and the amount of making up I'd have to do.

I am trying to be very mature about this, that's why I keeping things anonymous?

Besides I'd like to know, I possibly can't be the only person who has experienced this sort of situation because they say there's nothing new under the sun. Please who has ever felt this way, I am very understanding and if something irks me, it would irk every body else too.


Wish I could explain better

Cc SIRTee15 1x2x3
What do you have to say about this? Are we blaming the woman in this case too?

faste:
99% of Nigeria's indomie women generation are not wife material!

And 99% of indomie generation MEN need WISDOM.