Four Reasons Why You Should not Allow Yourself To Become A Baby Mama - Family - Nairaland
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| Four Reasons Why You Should not Allow Yourself To Become A Baby Mama by Darlingme(f): 4:49pm On Jan 10, 2022 |
To be honest with you, in as much as the modern world made us believe that “it’s not a big deal to have a child outside wedlock” “so long as you are financially stable, you can go ahead and have a child for any man of your choice” My dear, I’m aware your life , how you live it, it’s your business, but there are certain things that are not just all about you, so long as you introduced a third party (a child) into your it. Before you decided to become a baby mama for any man out there, there are few things I would love you to understand. 1. YOUR CHOICES BECOME LIMITED 2. YOU MIGHT RAISE A BITTER CHILD 3. LACK OF SELF TRUST/ SELF CONFIDENCE 4. STIGMATIZATION 5. YOU MIGHT END UP BECOMING A DESPERATE PERSON More details in the video below You can share your view or more opinion to help a future victim. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=InOVp7HQAts 3 Likes 3 Shares |
| Re: Four Reasons Why You Should not Allow Yourself To Become A Baby Mama by MrBrownJay1(m): 5:21pm On Jan 10, 2022 |
ARRANT NONSENSE OF THE HIGHEST ORDER!!!!! Darlingme: DELUDED NONSENSE #1 the same choices that a married mother has, is the same that a babymama would have... no difference whatsoever! 2. YOU MIGHT RAISE A BITTER CHILD DELUDED NONSENSE #2 why would a child be bitter when he has the love from daddy and mummy?!?! why would a child be bitter, when he has access to both his parents? why would a child be bitter when he/she gets twice as much as everything?! 3. LACK OF SELF TRUST/ SELF CONFIDENCE DELUDED NONSENSE #3 why would any babymama lack self trust/confidence?! you making it sound like these woman are crying all day and hiding away in shame because they are babymamas, lol! NEWSFLASH: some of these babymamas out there are proudly displaying their BM status without giving a fukc what you religious hypocrites think..... go ask Linda Ikeji or Genevieve! 4. STIGMATIZATION DELUDED NONSENSE #4 nobody should give a fukc what deluded total strangers think of you.... if you are ok with being a babymama, and fully understand what it entails, then so be it! 5. YOU MIGHT END UP BECOMING A DESPERATE PERSON FINAL DELUDED NONSENSE becoming a desperate person because they are babymamas?!?!?! BWAAAAAAAAh what type of nonsense wont we read on NL from religious people trying to shove down your throat "their" way of living and/or views?!?!?! 2 Likes |
| Re: Four Reasons Why You Should not Allow Yourself To Become A Baby Mama by socialmediaman: 5:35pm On Jan 10, 2022 |
The rise of feminism (in Nigeria's case, the rise of misandry) is believed by many to have destroyed traditional family values which affected mostly black families. 1 Like 1 Share |
| Re: Four Reasons Why You Should not Allow Yourself To Become A Baby Mama by Darlingme(f): 5:49pm On Jan 10, 2022 |
@mrbrownjay, I am not a religious person. One question for you. Can you marry a lady with a child? Have you ever loved another man's child as if it yours before? Most African men can't. Have you met Linda, chioma and Genevieve personally and they've been honest with you on their challenges? Cheering baby mama up online while you avoid them offline is hypocrisy. The essence of these, is not to discourage, insult or discriminate baby Mama's out there but to help future victims. 9 Likes |
| Re: Four Reasons Why You Should not Allow Yourself To Become A Baby Mama by FORWARDEVERLY: 5:52pm On Jan 10, 2022 |
Experience is the best teacher... Most well to do Men always about them like locust... Op.. like you said.. there choices are limited.. they (ladies) won't know until they become a single mom.. 4 Likes 1 Share |
| Re: Four Reasons Why You Should not Allow Yourself To Become A Baby Mama by yemmit90: 6:56pm On Jan 10, 2022 |
MrBrownJay1: I dont think you understand the contents of this write up. 1. Only tiny percentage of men will settle for single mothers irrespective of how beautiful or morally sounded they are. This eventually made their choice limited. 2. Children needs the present of both mother and father for their psychological wellbeing. Absent of one does not help in development of a child ( especially under the age of 10). 3. Since the society is built on social and family settings, she may feel less of herself for her inability to sustain or preserve this society settings. 4. No matter how strong a single mother thought she is, she will definitely experience a serious stigmatization. She will live among people that will include lovely couples, virtuous women, young couples etc. Besides, she can never be a good example or role model to single girls since society gives more value to marriage institution. 5. The stigmatization, low self esteem, limited choice etc, could actually leed to desperation the moment she find someone who accepted all her flaws. 7 Likes 1 Share |
| Re: Four Reasons Why You Should not Allow Yourself To Become A Baby Mama by MrBrownJay1(m): 7:37pm On Jan 10, 2022 |
yemmit90: so you are assuming that A) women dont know about the fact that African men frown upon single mothers?!?!? these women do not care what men with misplaced egos think, thats why they gladly become babymamas and live their lives happilly, do you know why? because a man who loves you will take you for ALL of you, single mother or not....but most importantly, B) there are babymamas out there, divorced mothers, widows etc.... and if a man puts value of a woman upon these issues, instead of judging her as a whole individual (character, values, lifestyle, personality etc), then no wonder so many deluded men marry total strangers that are virgins, instead of good women. here is a simple question for you: give me an "intelligent" reason as to why a single woman would be better than a single mother?!?!?! (important word here is "INTELLIGENT") 2. Children needs the present of both mother and father for their psychological wellbeing. Absent of one does not help in development of a child ( especially under the age of 10). thats because you WRONGLY assume that a father will automatically be absent from a child's life, simply because he aint married to his/her mother... look around you, what your assumptions are totally false! 3. Since the society is built on social and family settings, she may feel less of herself for her inability to sustain or preserve this society settings. thats because you wrongly assume that A) a babymama wont date/find a man anymore because she has a child....while if you open your eyes and look around you, its far from the truth....but most importantly, B) the above you wrote has absolutely no relevance to single mothers, and all to do with WOMEN in general. a woman past 30 will be more looked down upon by that society than a single mother. here is again a simple question to you: whats more important (about that society) to these women....MARRIAGE or BEING MOTHERS?!?!?! 4. No matter how strong a single mother thought she is, she will definitely experience a serious stigmatization. She will live among people that will include lovely couples, virtuous women, young couples etc. Besides, she can never be a good example or role model to single girls since society gives more value to marriage institution. AGAIN, stop wrongly assuming that a single mother cannot get a man in her life, just because some deluded Nigerian/African men wouldnt marry a single mother (but wouldnt care dating her). African/Nigerian men have no problem marrying a good woman who is a single mother (especially with the state of oloshism in the land), and the few that look down upon single mothers can settle for the other women, no big deal. trying to make it look like single mothers are miserable women that people point fingers at in the street, and that are ostracized from the community (like wild animal) is far from the truth... also, funny how you automatically ASSUME again that a single mother is NOT a virtuous, lovely person with someone in her life, ahahahahahah! society gives value to great women, and you dont have to be married to be a great MOTHER, a great ROLE MODEL TO WOMEN, a great PERSON...such failed mindset is lies from people desperate for marriage at any cost! we all know many devil/demons/wh0res/bad mothers etc that are married! majority of the boggest oloshos out there eventually get married! here is a question to you:" do you really think any of Davido or Wizkid babymamas have any problem finding a man who wants to marry them?!?!?! 5. The "assumed" stigmatization, low self esteem, limited choice etc, could actually leed to desperation the moment she find someone who accepted all her flaws. lol, what flaws exactly are you talking about?!?!?!? the flaws that you assume because deluded men with misplaced egos may look down on such woman?!?! all the above are all WRONG ASSUMPTIONS from somebody who doesnt come to this discussion with an open mind. you look down on these women and you are trying to make them look like miserable beings, while this is far from the truth. yes having a child isnt easy (whether married or single) and the minute you decide to value your life's blessing depending on the deluded people that may judge your actions, then you have lost the plot. the minute a woman has a child and she (with or without daddy) can cater for that child's emotional/physical/financial needs, then she, babydaddy and that child are BLESSED! regardless of what total strangers believe! 3 Likes 1 Share |
| Re: Four Reasons Why You Should not Allow Yourself To Become A Baby Mama by MrBrownJay1(m): 7:51pm On Jan 10, 2022 |
Darlingme: YES I CAN...i would rather marry a GOOD woman (who happens to have a child) than a single woman with failed character/mentality/state of mind ALL DAY EVERYDAY!!!! the problem here is that you people automatically wrongly assume that a single woman will be better than a single mother, while we all know that this is completely false. many beautiful single women out there are single because they aint shiiit, and nobody wants them due to their failed characater/lifestyle/state of mind etc Have you ever loved another man's child as if it yours before? Most African men can't. again, you are focussing on the wrong issues.... THAT CHILD HAS A FATHER, why whould you want me to love him/her as my own?!?!? that would be my woman's child, and there is nothing wrong with that. sadly, men with misplaced ego have issue raising a child that aint theirs. whats the big deal? you love that child as a friend, as the child of your woman, as your stepchild and basta...you certainly wont kill yourself for that child, like you would for your own flesh and blood! his mum knows that, everyone knows that, why cant you?!?!? Have you met Linda, chioma and Genevieve personally and they've been honest with you on their challenges? i doubt their challenges is any different than married mothers.... but hey, if you've talked to them, let us know about it! as from my own personal direct knowledge of babymamas and single mothers, they certainly aint suffering, as you wanna portray them. Cheering baby mama up online while you avoid them offline is hypocrisy. stop wrongly assuming nonsense online, and stick to the issue instead. The essence of these, is not to discourage, insult or discriminate baby Mama's out there but to help future victims. YES we have to educate women that being a babymama is not A CRIME, therefore you are not a "victim"...you are a woman blessed with a child, that is not married to the babydaddy (and as long as you can cater for the child's needs, all is well)... and as much as many people will be quick to selfishly look down on your life, you should dismiss their ignorant claim about YOUR OWN LIFE. its YOUR life and make the best of it. there is absolutely NOTHING Wrong with being a single mother, a divorced mother or a widowed mother.... deluded people with misplaced ego will try to tell you the contrary and call you a "victim", but that is far from the truth! ...and thats my humble opinion on the subject! 2 Likes |
| Re: Four Reasons Why You Should not Allow Yourself To Become A Baby Mama by Dainy1(m): 8:36pm On Jan 10, 2022 |
My opinion on this. Ladies, try as much as possible not to be a baby mama. At least, Davido and Choima will teach you something. I can never marry anybody's baby mama. 3 Likes |
| Re: Four Reasons Why You Should not Allow Yourself To Become A Baby Mama by Vision101(m): 1:32am On Jan 11, 2022 |
Baby mama or daddy just like lesbianism and homosexuality are devil's invention. Satan is a master at counterfeiting. He paints it so well that the world will love it but the end is destruction. 2 Likes |
| Re: Four Reasons Why You Should not Allow Yourself To Become A Baby Mama by DemMannaScam: 6:55am On Jan 11, 2022 |
E pain am die  E be like say baby mamas full ur family  Pele o MrBrownJay1: 3 Likes |
| Re: Four Reasons Why You Should not Allow Yourself To Become A Baby Mama by Darlingme(f): 8:27pm On Jan 11, 2022 |
DemMannaScam:The aim of this post is not to make anyone feel bad though. |
| Re: Four Reasons Why You Should not Allow Yourself To Become A Baby Mama by olabrinks(f): 8:52pm On Jan 11, 2022 |
Married women can still become single mothers. In fact it’s very common, go and ask women in their 50s and 40s. Nothing is ever guaranteed in life. Whether you have a child or not, most women have limited choices anyways when it comes to men especially after 30. Women should know this and have peace and never revolve their entire sense of being around a man. Vice Versa. Live life and create memories, if you make mistakes or find yourself in unfortunate circumstances, move on. Every day your are moving closer to your grave. |
| Re: Four Reasons Why You Should not Allow Yourself To Become A Baby Mama by Fiscus105(m): 8:58pm On Jan 11, 2022 |
Darlingme: Hope u take cognisance of number of available guys vs ladies into consideration? ........you also went deeper by micro zoning guys that ready for marriage from available guys? If u now insist that all ladies must get married, indirectly you are clamouring for so many ladies that would be single through out their life time without kids. Which one is better, baby mama and seeing ur kids but no hubby OR pure single, no kid and no hubby? Try not to solve "a problem" by creating more and bigger problems. |
| Re: Four Reasons Why You Should not Allow Yourself To Become A Baby Mama by Uyi168: 7:22am On Jan 12, 2022 |
MrBrownJay1:. everything you wrote up there is deluded nonesense. |
| Re: Four Reasons Why You Should not Allow Yourself To Become A Baby Mama by Uyi168: 7:30am On Jan 12, 2022 |
no matter how we or social media try to glamorize it, babby mama is nonesense. no sane lady would agree to that set up, except only in situations beyond your control. |
| Re: Four Reasons Why You Should not Allow Yourself To Become A Baby Mama by Biglittlelois(f): 8:14am On Jan 12, 2022 |
Fiscus105: If you are trying to insinuate that women are more than men in the world, step out of your sleeping coma and research for your own benefit and knowledge, MEN ARE MORE THAN WOMEN IN THE WORLD, so wipe off the delusion from your thought process and spread the info out to the likes of you who choose to wallow in continuous ignorance just to massage deflated ego And yes, if all ladies gets married, there will be no single women lacking husbands, instead there will be men lacking wives according to world population, So I support Op, ladies should ensure that they get married and have kids in a stable comfortable family life/settings.
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| Re: Four Reasons Why You Should not Allow Yourself To Become A Baby Mama by Fiscus105(m): 10:19am On Jan 12, 2022 |
Biglittlelois: Men are more than women according to window dress world population? I laugh in Swahili........ Abeg stop running away from ur shadow, it's great form of human deceit. Anyway, the day you will know the truth, its the day you shall set free! |
| Re: Four Reasons Why You Should not Allow Yourself To Become A Baby Mama by Biglittlelois(f): 10:39am On Jan 12, 2022 |
Fiscus105: Pls have sense, so we should believe the words of nl boys that springs up statistics from their ass instead of known world view? Your delusion must have clouded your sense of reasoning, and your deceitful shadow is yours and your ilks alone, Bring up clear facts with links backing you nairaland dull boys ignorant rubbish of women being more than men, if not, try not be dull next time, until then, statistics remains that MEN ARE MORE THAN WOMEN IN THE WORLD, let that sink in.
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| Re: Four Reasons Why You Should not Allow Yourself To Become A Baby Mama by drnoel: 12:22pm On Jan 12, 2022 |
Darlingme: This is all BS, everything U wrote. Reason being is that U streamlined yourself to our archaic African mentality were the man is the alpha and omega. That scenario is a fallacy cos when you teach our girls and empower them. Let them know they don't need a man to be happy, they will know their Selfworth and no man can take it from them |
| Re: Four Reasons Why You Should not Allow Yourself To Become A Baby Mama by Darlingme(f): 6:34pm On Jan 12, 2022 |
drnoel:I never mentioned men are alpha and Omega in my write up. Girls (female) are to be empowered. No gender need another gender to be happy. But there are consequences when a lady decided to stay on her own and turn herself to a baby mama. This topic is complex but there are many young ladies out there that needs certain orientation and counseling. |
| Re: Four Reasons Why You Should not Allow Yourself To Become A Baby Mama by drnoel: 6:38pm On Jan 12, 2022 |
Darlingme: Woman who knows her Selfworth won't call herself baby mama. The term is insultive. |
| Re: Four Reasons Why You Should not Allow Yourself To Become A Baby Mama by Darlingme(f): 7:29pm On Jan 12, 2022 |
drnoel:Yes of course. No woman call herself that name. It's the people, society (you and i) that calls her that name and it's insultive. |
| Re: Four Reasons Why You Should not Allow Yourself To Become A Baby Mama by drnoel: 7:47pm On Jan 12, 2022 |
Darlingme: Yes and if she was holding her own, knew her Selfworth and not whoring around. Nobody, even society won't call her baby mama. It's these slay queen's that that terms is used for |
| Re: Four Reasons Why You Should not Allow Yourself To Become A Baby Mama by kodix(m): 9:08pm On Jan 12, 2022 |
Marriedooo, baby mamas/daddies never pay anybody,just to get a suitable condition that will make u live your life happily na d best, no be say u be married dey get hbp and pretending all is well but very sad or b very unhappy baby mama/dady.after many thieves,ritualists,yahoo plus etc na married people pikin they get papa na mama.soooo life varies for everyone face ur own and make something out of it. |
| Re: Four Reasons Why You Should not Allow Yourself To Become A Baby Mama by yemmit90: 11:42pm On Jan 12, 2022 |
Biglittlelois: You are right, statistically men are slightly more than women, but in reality, less men are available for women later in life. Men are risk takers, they die in large number before making it to adulthood. There are more men in the prisons than women, more men die serving in the military than women. There are many dangerous mining jobs that takes men life than women. More men die in accidents than women. These and many other reasons affect the ratio of eligible men to women in term of relationship and marriage. |
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