Re: What Marriage Advice Would You Give Your Younger Self? by Kobojunkie: 12:16am On Jun 07, 2022 |
VULCAN: "Strong in this one the Confusion is" said in Yoda's voice Are you at least able to prove the confusion is not strongest with you?. ![undecided](https://www.nairaland.com/faces/undecided.png) Again.... Kobojunkie: Submission is born of God's curse on marriage which rendered marriage of this world and not of the Kingdom of God - Genesis 3 vs 16 & Luke 20 vs 34 -36. Therefore, there is nothing "Christian" about marriage, or your formula. ![undecided](https://www.nairaland.com/faces/undecided.png) |
Re: What Marriage Advice Would You Give Your Younger Self? by Kobojunkie: 12:25am On Jun 07, 2022 |
Yusufisraelj: 1.Then rest in the name of Jesus, REST!
Truth by it's very Nature does not need validation, it has a way of flowing to the top effortlessly, even though slowly. Learn this and stop trying to prove points by all means. 1. Proclaiming the Truth of God is a pivotal part of the rest Jesus Christ promised those who heed His call - Matthew 11 vs 28 - 30 ![lipsrsealed](https://www.nairaland.com/faces/lipsrsealed.png) 2. Prove points? I ain't trying to prove any point. Simply giving people opportunity to learn the Truth from the lies they hold to. ![undecided](https://www.nairaland.com/faces/undecided.png) The Truth has been with man since the garden of Eden (the tree of knowledge of good and evil) but it remained a mystery to men until Jesus Christ came and revealed it. Jesus Christ said that it is only when you use the understanding that you have that more understanding will be given to you - Matthew 13 vs 12 & Mark 4 vs 22 - 24 - otherwise even the little understanding you had will be taken away from you - Matthew 25 vs 29.. ![undecided](https://www.nairaland.com/faces/undecided.png) You see, I don't use the understanding I have because I want to prove points nor do I seek validation from anyone. Instead I use it because by doing so I obey Jesus Christ's own commandment to me, with the promise that I will receive even more understanding from Him as I continue to. ![undecided](https://www.nairaland.com/faces/undecided.png) 1 Like |
Re: What Marriage Advice Would You Give Your Younger Self? by NuclearReactor: 12:37am On Jun 07, 2022 |
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Re: What Marriage Advice Would You Give Your Younger Self? by NuclearReactor: 12:54am On Jun 07, 2022 |
2 Likes |
Re: What Marriage Advice Would You Give Your Younger Self? by Judybash93(m): 2:59am On Jun 07, 2022 |
Durabest: I have been married for six years now with two beautiful Childre.My advice would be that,1:Don,t be disperate to go into marriage,2: Don,t pretend to be what you are not in order to win a man's heart.3:When your guy friends are around him do not join their conversation when you are not invited even when they are talking about your village people joining a conversation you are not invited will devalue your guy,4:Try to knw when your guy is needt of food don,t always wait 4 him to ask b4 you serve him food.5:If you don't love a man,don't go into marriage with him.6:always be truthful don't ever belive a lie can gurantee you marriage.7:don't hide what you hate and don't hate what he love most just show litle advice if u don't like it.8: don't go into marriage with man who don't love you.9:When a man tells you things that he hates and asked you to stop doing those things he detest don't dare him.10: Be humble.11:don,t always feel without you he can't sx so there4 you will give him sx when you feel like. You're truly experienced |
Re: What Marriage Advice Would You Give Your Younger Self? by Hunter12: 3:01am On Jun 07, 2022 |
A young married man with a wife and a son. I do tutorial and assignment for undergraduate students but I've being struggling financially since the beginning of this ASUU strike. I borrowed from loan app to pay another loan app and I'm in serious debt right now which is making me contemplating suicide. I am not begging for money but give me a rewarding job. I hold a master's degree in Microbiology. Willing to relocate from Kwara state |
Re: What Marriage Advice Would You Give Your Younger Self? by ikevictor: 3:45am On Jun 07, 2022 |
The signs you see are real...
Its not your imagination, its your ancestors pre-informing you about the road ahead. 3 Likes |
Re: What Marriage Advice Would You Give Your Younger Self? by Chomsky1967(f): 5:18am On Jun 07, 2022 |
Mariangeles:
Your wife go don hear nwiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii! ![undecided](https://www.nairaland.com/faces/undecided.png)
I made it easier for others to read. You're welcome. ![smiley](https://www.nairaland.com/faces/smiley.png) Exactly my thoughts. Poor woman 3 Likes |
Re: What Marriage Advice Would You Give Your Younger Self? by folake4u(f): 5:21am On Jun 07, 2022 |
doggedfighter: And the thread died !
Religious people in a bid to outdo each other killed what would have been interesting thread. ![undecided](https://www.nairaland.com/faces/undecided.png)
The thing dey pain me oh. I say make I use this thread relax from small reading, fiammmmm!! Religious arguments upandan. Waste of attention. ![undecided](https://www.nairaland.com/faces/undecided.png) 2 Likes |
Re: What Marriage Advice Would You Give Your Younger Self? by Boobysmith: 6:02am On Jun 07, 2022 |
. |
Re: What Marriage Advice Would You Give Your Younger Self? by Jaculze(m): 6:04am On Jun 07, 2022 |
Hmmmm... I'm here to read comment and ...
Let me power up my phone with this powerbank and read these comments
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Re: What Marriage Advice Would You Give Your Younger Self? by Boobysmith: 6:08am On Jun 07, 2022 |
Durabest: I have been married for six years now with two beautiful Childre.My advice would be that,1:Don,t be disperate to go into marriage,2: Don,t pretend to be what you are not in order to win a man's heart.3:When your guy friends are around him do not join their conversation when you are not invited even when they are talking about your village people joining a conversation you are not invited will devalue your guy,4:Try to knw when your guy is needt of food don,t always wait 4 him to ask b4 you serve him food.5:If you don't love a man,don't go into marriage with him.6:always be truthful don't ever belive a lie can gurantee you marriage.7:don't hide what you hate and don't hate what he love most just show litle advice if u don't like it.8: don't go into marriage with man who don't love you.9:When a man tells you things that he hates and asked you to stop doing those things he detest don't dare him.10: Be humble.11:don,t always feel without you he can't sx so there4 you will give him sx when you feel like. 100 of those advice won't save you if you married a wrong partner 1 Like |
Re: What Marriage Advice Would You Give Your Younger Self? by Harrykn: 6:50am On Jun 07, 2022 |
SavageBoy: Don't marry Nigerian girls ![grin](https://www.nairaland.com/faces/grin.png) Shey nah psycho oyibo old women dem dey marry every Saturday for your area! You better start wife hunt now oh 1 Like |
Re: What Marriage Advice Would You Give Your Younger Self? by Yusufisraelj(m): 7:02am On Jun 07, 2022 |
Kobojunkie: 1. Proclaiming the Truth of God is a pivotal part of the rest Jesus Christ promised those who heed His call - Matthew 11 vs 28 - 30 ![lipsrsealed](https://www.nairaland.com/faces/lipsrsealed.png)
2. Prove points? I ain't trying to prove any point. Simply giving people opportunity to learn the Truth from the lies they hold to. ![undecided](https://www.nairaland.com/faces/undecided.png)
The Truth has been with man since the garden of Eden (the tree of knowledge of good and evil) but it remained a mystery to men until Jesus Christ came and revealed it. Jesus Christ said that it is only when you use the understanding that you have that more understanding will be given to you - Matthew 13 vs 12 & Mark 4 vs 22 - 24 - otherwise even the little understanding you had will be taken away from you - Matthew 25 vs 29.. ![undecided](https://www.nairaland.com/faces/undecided.png)
You see, I don't use the understanding I have because I want to prove points nor do I seek validation from anyone. Instead I use it because by doing so I obey Jesus Christ's own commandment to me, with the promise that I will receive even more understanding from Him as I continue to. ![undecided](https://www.nairaland.com/faces/undecided.png) you go like trouble pass fight, you just derailed this beautiful trend, with "truth" that's necessary but not needed here. 1 Like |
Re: What Marriage Advice Would You Give Your Younger Self? by UyaiIncomparabl(f): 7:10am On Jun 07, 2022 |
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Re: What Marriage Advice Would You Give Your Younger Self? by okoroemeka(m): 7:19am On Jun 07, 2022 |
UyaiIncomparabl: This post is for mature, married folks.
Married folks, you have all had experiences in your various marriages for however long you have stayed married. Most importantly, you have gained knowledge from them. That being said, wisdom is what you can do today but couldn't do before. It's what you would do before but never would now.
So, the question is, If you could travel back through time to advise your younger self about marriage, what advice would you give? I am now married for 23 years now to my best friend and companion,with 4 children and twins as the last borns,three of my children are in the university with my second daughter warming up for nursing school,I don't think there is anything I can wish to change about my marriage,my wife is reasonable, realistic and sexy,despite all of my numerous monumental fuckups she is always there will give you advice and correct you whether you like it or not,many people find it hard to believe she is the mother of my pretty 21 yr old first daughter,if there will be a next life after death I will want nothing more but to be with you,thank God I took that radical decision in December 1999 when I was just 23 years because I have seen the gem in you and you have proven me right,I remove my hat and bow to all the women around the world that are the foundation of their families,the rock for their husbands to stand on and the love of their life's,we appreciate. 9 Likes 1 Share |
Re: What Marriage Advice Would You Give Your Younger Self? by UyaiIncomparabl(f): 7:21am On Jun 07, 2022 |
camri: are you tribalistic when it comes to marrying? A bit. |
Re: What Marriage Advice Would You Give Your Younger Self? by Nobody: 7:40am On Jun 07, 2022 |
UyaiIncomparabl:
Can you just stop already? Going by all the Jagbajantis she has been writing. Seun of Nairaland is suppose to give us a feature to block certain usernames from our post, especially those we know will derail it. Just like how the Diary section is restricted, we should be able to restrict certain users. Instagram, Twitter, Whatsapp all have this feature too, so I don't know why NL cannot have it. 3 Likes 1 Share |
Re: What Marriage Advice Would You Give Your Younger Self? by blingxx(m): 8:08am On Jun 07, 2022 |
SavageBoy: Don't marry Nigerian girls ![grin](https://www.nairaland.com/faces/grin.png) Don't go for girls you like go for girls that like you and have peace of mind .. all pvssy is the same 1 Like |
Re: What Marriage Advice Would You Give Your Younger Self? by Tzar(m): 8:38am On Jun 07, 2022 |
1. NEVER marry out of pity or because of pregnancy (Do a DNA test for the baby if in doubt- it cost just 90-120k, take proper care of the baby if its yours. 2. Marry a woman that has a mother with moral pedigree (your wife will become a copy of her mum 80% of the time). 3. Only marry a woman who earns and spends her own money (support her financially when the need arises). 4 Marry a God fearing woman and a woman who comes from a God fearing and decent family. 5. Perform fertilty and STD test on you & your partner. 6. Pray and follow the direction of God 100%. If there is even 1% doubt, BACK OFF! 7. NEVER rush into marriage! It NEVER ends well if you rush! 8. NEVER prove your LOVE for your partner with marriage! 9. Marry your friend not just your lover. There must be common areas of interest between both of you outside what lovers do. 10. You are not obliged to finanacially suport your baby mama, but the baby's well being is the obligation of both of you. 3 Likes |
Re: What Marriage Advice Would You Give Your Younger Self? by Nelsonobj: 8:55am On Jun 07, 2022 |
I have been married for some years now I discovered that marriage is another institution itself My beloved brothers and sisters pls don't go into marriage because your mates are married or your girlfriend is pulling you to do so , go into it because u are ready for it both mentally, physically and most expecialy financially, No woman will love you if you are a broke ass, Marriage is not bed of roses. |
Re: What Marriage Advice Would You Give Your Younger Self? by Nelsonobj: 9:03am On Jun 07, 2022 |
I have been married for some years now I discovered that marriage is another institution itself My beloved brothers and sisters pls don't go into marriage because your mates are married or your girlfriend is pulling you to do so or out of pitty, go into it because u are ready for it both mentally, physically and most expecialy financially, No woman will love you if you are a broke ass, Marriage is not bed of roses. 1. Marty a God fearing woman
2. Don't depend on your woman's income, even if she earns more than you do, keep giving her money to support her
3. Last last never allow your pocket empty, cos there must be a time u will need to take some bottles of beer when the house is on fire Married men will understand this perfectly 1 Like 1 Share |
Re: What Marriage Advice Would You Give Your Younger Self? by ezanafe(m): 9:43am On Jun 07, 2022 |
Angela62: I am married for about a decade now, and I am enjoying my marriage. Honestly, if the worse happens and I became a widow, I will not marry any other man, I will train my kids alone. That is how much I love my husband and cherish my marriage. Since childhood, I have always been close to my grandmother, I grew up with her since my mum died when I was a child. I learned a lot from her. I can still remember the advice she gave to me when I wanted to marry my husband, and I will tell you exactly that.
1. Look at the qualities and characters of the man you want to marry. Most ''shine shine'' men, as my grandma will put it are not the real men. `Just as sugar is sweet but unhealthy, lots of men are like that. That bricklayer that sends his mum money in the village every month, that doesn't go to a club, doesn't smoke and buy expensive designers, he might not even give you butterflies, those are the real men. Ten years from now when you are pregnant with your third child, his masculinity will be like an umbrella to protect, provide and be the best father for your kids.
But you see those ones that are doing fine boys only, care more about the phone they use and the girl they sleep with this weekend than their future, those you must avoid. They may be attractive now, but when the difficulties of marriage come especially financially, then you realize that truly, internal beauty (characters and virtues) is what keeps marriage. So do not sacrifice the future due to your youthful exuberance.
2. Look at his patterns, those are the secrets to his future and of course, your future. Does he wakes up and go to work every day? What is the relationship he has with his family? How does he handle stress? is he hardworking? Do people around him respect him? Where does he go after work? What is your assessment of his friends? `What are his goals? etc. You might be clouded with feelings with this assessment especially when you are in love, so you might ask people you trust for advice. I saw this thread some few years ago by pansophist, where he wrote about qualities you should look for in a man for marriage, I implore you to check it out. The guy is on point. As I read through it, I kept nodding my head in affirmation because my husband easily covered all these qualities.
https://www.nairaland.com/6257463/part-two-traits-woman-should
Also when I first met my husband, I wasn't that interested. He appears so ordinary (if you know what I mean), but as I scratch further, the depth of his manliness opens up. I was not attracted at first, but everything fell into place, and I was glad I didn't just brush him away. But I couldn't see his qualities quickly, it was my grandma that pointed it all out. So you should really have someone older, that have walked the talk of marriage, to advise and guide you.
3. Support him. Men are at their best when their wive are supportive. For example, my husband never asks me about my income, but every of my penny goes to my household. The idea that a man has to carry all the financial responsibilities is a self-defeating adventure. Such a woman punishes herself due to her short-sightedness and selfishness by reducing her worth in his eyes, making her easily replaceable. Thank you! |
Re: What Marriage Advice Would You Give Your Younger Self? by Ajibade123(m): 9:55am On Jun 07, 2022 |
Kobojunkie: No one says you shouldn't marry abeg..Marriage is simply a choice available to all... and no one says you can't chose the curse over salvation either. ![lipsrsealed](https://www.nairaland.com/faces/lipsrsealed.png) you are really confused for real |
Re: What Marriage Advice Would You Give Your Younger Self? by UyaiIncomparabl(f): 10:00am On Jun 07, 2022 |
truthsayer009:
Going by all the Jagbajantis she has been writing.
Seun of Nairaland is suppose to give us a feature to block certain usernames from our post, especially those we know will derail it. Just like how the Diary section is restricted, we should be able to restrict certain users. Instagram, Twitter, Whatsapp all have this feature too, so I don't know why NL cannot have it. Fully in support of this motion. It's so sad to see how this thread turned into a religious war of words. I hope Seun looks into this urgently because it's beginning to get annoying. |
Re: What Marriage Advice Would You Give Your Younger Self? by Donemmy(m): 12:53pm On Jun 07, 2022 |
Comrade I am your Senior in the ministry but i can confidently say, you have said it all. In addition, show love to both family possibly on equal ratio. Durabest: I have been married for six years now with two beautiful Childre.My advice would be that,1:Don,t be disperate to go into marriage,2: Don,t pretend to be what you are not in order to win a man's heart.3:When your guy friends are around him do not join their conversation when you are not invited even when they are talking about your village people joining a conversation you are not invited will devalue your guy,4:Try to knw when your guy is needt of food don,t always wait 4 him to ask b4 you serve him food.5:If you don't love a man,don't go into marriage with him.6:always be truthful don't ever belive a lie can gurantee you marriage.7:don't hide what you hate and don't hate what he love most just show litle advice if u don't like it.8: don't go into marriage with man who don't love you.9:When a man tells you things that he hates and asked you to stop doing those things he detest don't dare him.10: Be humble.11:don,t always feel without you he can't sx so there4 you will give him sx when you feel like. |
Re: What Marriage Advice Would You Give Your Younger Self? by Donemmy(m): 1:00pm On Jun 07, 2022 |
wow. you're a blessing to your Man. May you continue to reap the good foundation of your marriage IJN. Angela62: I am married for about a decade now, and I am enjoying my marriage. Honestly, if the worse happens and I became a widow, I will not marry any other man, I will train my kids alone. That is how much I love my husband and cherish my marriage. Since childhood, I have always been close to my grandmother, I grew up with her since my mum died when I was a child. I learned a lot from her. I can still remember the advice she gave to me when I wanted to marry my husband, and I will tell you exactly that.
1. Look at the qualities and characters of the man you want to marry. Most ''shine shine'' men, as my grandma will put it are not the real men. `Just as sugar is sweet but unhealthy, lots of men are like that. That bricklayer that sends his mum money in the village every month, that doesn't go to a club, doesn't smoke and buy expensive designers, he might not even give you butterflies, those are the real men. Ten years from now when you are pregnant with your third child, his masculinity will be like an umbrella to protect, provide and be the best father for your kids.
But you see those ones that are doing fine boys only, care more about the phone they use and the girl they sleep with this weekend than their future, those you must avoid. They may be attractive now, but when the difficulties of marriage come especially financially, then you realize that truly, internal beauty (characters and virtues) is what keeps marriage. So do not sacrifice the future due to your youthful exuberance.
2. Look at his patterns, those are the secrets to his future and of course, your future. Does he wakes up and go to work every day? What is the relationship he has with his family? How does he handle stress? is he hardworking? Do people around him respect him? Where does he go after work? What is your assessment of his friends? `What are his goals? etc. You might be clouded with feelings with this assessment especially when you are in love, so you might ask people you trust for advice. I saw this thread some few years ago by pansophist, where he wrote about qualities you should look for in a man for marriage, I implore you to check it out. The guy is on point. As I read through it, I kept nodding my head in affirmation because my husband easily covered all these qualities.
https://www.nairaland.com/6257463/part-two-traits-woman-should
Also when I first met my husband, I wasn't that interested. He appears so ordinary (if you know what I mean), but as I scratch further, the depth of his manliness opens up. I was not attracted at first, but everything fell into place, and I was glad I didn't just brush him away. But I couldn't see his qualities quickly, it was my grandma that pointed it all out. So you should really have someone older, that have walked the talk of marriage, to advise and guide you.
3. Support him. Men are at their best when their wive are supportive. For example, my husband never asks me about my income, but every of my penny goes to my household. The idea that a man has to carry all the financial responsibilities is a self-defeating adventure. Such a woman punishes herself due to her short-sightedness and selfishness by reducing her worth in his eyes, making her easily replaceable. |
Re: What Marriage Advice Would You Give Your Younger Self? by frozen70(f): 1:21pm On Jun 07, 2022 |
UyaiIncomparabl: This post is for mature, married folks.
Married folks, you have all had experiences in your various marriages for however long you have stayed married. Most importantly, you have gained knowledge from them. That being said, wisdom is what you can do today but couldn't do before. It's what you would do before but never would now.
So, the question is, If you could travel back through time to advise your younger self about marriage, what advice would you give? Marry your best friend Never hide anything from each other Always make sure you settle your difference immediately Lastly Be truthful never tell lies to your partner you will loose the trust they built for you 3 Likes |
Re: What Marriage Advice Would You Give Your Younger Self? by Kobojunkie: 1:33pm On Jun 07, 2022 |
Ajibade123:
you are really confused for real I think you should stop trying to pass your confusion off as mine. ![undecided](https://www.nairaland.com/faces/undecided.png) |
Re: What Marriage Advice Would You Give Your Younger Self? by Kobojunkie: 1:43pm On Jun 07, 2022 |
Yusufisraelj: you go like trouble pass fight, you just derailed this beautiful trend, with "truth" that's necessary but not needed here. I didn't derail the thread at all. It was those who chose to attack my response to the one poster that instead did that beginning on mainly the second page. If you were impartial you would see this yourself. ![undecided](https://www.nairaland.com/faces/undecided.png) The thread is on marriage advice you would give your younger self, right? Well, everything I have stated so far is what I would relay to my younger self if my younger self would listen ofcourse. So why attack me or accuse me for derailing this here thread? ![undecided](https://www.nairaland.com/faces/undecided.png) 1 Like |
Re: What Marriage Advice Would You Give Your Younger Self? by WhisperedNoise: 2:16pm On Jun 07, 2022 |
Kobojunkie: I am not the one who made this thread about bible study. I simply corrected a person who made false claims about the Christianity. That is all I did. The resulting attack, I had absolutely nothing to do with. And if you notice, not a single one of those who rose to attack were able to even show me wrong in my submission. ![undecided](https://www.nairaland.com/faces/undecided.png) Hi Kobo, You know that your statement about Christianity was to twist general, well known facts. Using your intelligence as a means to strike up arguments can be funny sometimes. I'm not talking about whether your assertion is right or wrong. I'm talking about how you twist certain bible scriptures. |
Re: What Marriage Advice Would You Give Your Younger Self? by Kobojunkie: 2:17pm On Jun 07, 2022 |
WhisperedNoise: Hi Kobo, You know that your statement about Christianity was to twist general, well known facts.
Explain what you mean by twist? ![undecided](https://www.nairaland.com/faces/undecided.png) What general well known facts were twisted and how? That is what Jesus Christ Himself, the Christ in the word Christian told you over 2000 years ago when He said your marriage is of this world(unholy) and not of the Kingdom of God(Christian). ![undecided](https://www.nairaland.com/faces/undecided.png) Is this fact here unwelcomed? ![undecided](https://www.nairaland.com/faces/undecided.png) |