Good Day everyone.
Everybody want care and love but that of the same-sex love is absolutely not accepted(I know that). I Choose to post this in the family section cause I think here have matured minds and People.
My Father have been really annoying and useless to me. I seriously hate him and wish I can change him but it's impossible, Either way, I Still Don't like him and never will.
My father left me/us when I was 10, the reason I said me is that I was the only male child. Growing up among 6 girls.
As I grow older, I realise every male child have needs his father to guide him to be a man, all of a sudden I developed hatred for my father and the whole family.
They get me upset with everything and make me do what I don't want to. I use to think if my dad was by me that shouldn't be happening or I rather want him to be the one to assign me.
NOTE: My dad travel and still haven't return he only call and sometimes send money that won't help at all.
I no longer want anything from him cause I think all I wanted was his presence, Advice and Guidance but he never gave me any attention.
Am currently 18 years old, young and somehow strong. But filled with hatred and anger for everyone. When I was 15 I was taken to the village, I don't like anybody but only someone that gave me Attention...... My Uncle. He is 35 years right now and might get married December this year or April.
He always ask if am Ok, and keep calling me his son..... He always congratulate me if I do things right. That's all I wanted to hear from my father.
My uncle made me stopped sleeping in same room with my mom or sisters saying am becoming a man I should not be with them, so I move to stay with him and his brother.
Since then he have been checking on me and asking me about my academic, giving me advice and all a father should give his son.
He made me feel alive that right now all I want is for me to be like his son I mean always with him. My mother stopped me from Working and now she's calling me weak. It makes me angry and hate everyone in the house, especially my dad that never care to find work for me.
Now even if I travel I use to stay with him cause I like it when he talks to me..... And the truth is I learn from him everyday.... Even think he and his friends talks about girls Alot.
I don't know if this is feelings or just happiness for what he Ave done for me. But right now, all I want is to be by his side. He appreciates my presence and work although I don't talk cause I was cut out from the environment by my mom in the name of DONT JOIN BAD BOYS.
I never had a girlfriend but I Ave 2 girls I crush on but don't talk about any cause he even told me to focus on education first.
Now my question is, is me being attached to him makes me like a Gay?
I never thought of any sexaul affairs with him all I want is for him to rub my hair when I do something good since that's what parents do to tell their children they're proud of them.
I Just don't know why he's always been on my mind. And I feel like I shouldn't leave him. Please why do I have such feelings?
I will accept of advice, insult and Suggestion.....

I no know wetin de control people for nairaland.

I go soon leave this forum for una

Hmmm....
Your condition is called "Youthful Exuberance" and I'm positive that you will see things differently as you grow older.

I read it over and over, but I didn't see anywhere you mentioned the...your (you and your mom's) reason your father left you guys. And since he sends money, you never mentioned his own reasons for staying away.
If he never told you himself, you never mentioned the efforts you made to reach out to him either.

Maybe you...we...can start from there, as it is the primary concern.
As for your gay perception, it is secondary for now because your father has nothing to do with it.

You are 18 bro relax, as you grow older you'd realise that all these hate towards your dad is unnecessary. A change of environment will reset your brain, I mean away from your mum and sisters

.

It's normal, u are simply yearning for a father figure in your life and somehow in ur subconscious u have seem to replace ur dad with him....now d issue of feeling gay it's simply ur dirty mind at work
...now back to d main issue...I want to advise u about your mum...U hv to understand that it's not easy for that woman...first your father and then you...U must learn how to lessen the load on your mother's head...forget what she said. In the past..U have to realise by virtue of your position in the family you have to lead those women right.

Your uncle is already playing a father's role in your life. That's the point. You will understand more about life as you grow older.

why you are feeling like that is because you grew up among women as the only boy. Somehow you have assimilated women's behavior and thought process. you need to stay in a house full of men to adjust your thought process and feelings

Alooone:
It's normal, u are simply yearning for a father figure in your life and somehow in ur subconscious u have seem to replace ur dad with him....now d issue of feeling gay it's simply ur dirty mind at work
...now back to d main issue...I want to advise u about your mum...U hv to understand that it's not easy for that woman...first your father and then you...U must learn how to lessen the load on your mother's head...forget what she said. In the past..U have to realise by virtue of your position in the family you have to lead those women right.

" yearning for a father figure in your life"

tee59:
Your uncle is already playing a father's role in your life. That's the point. You will understand more about life as you grow older.

as you grow older, you would begin to understand more about life. Pour out your heart to "this uncle of yours" , hear what advice he would give to you.

Jay5mie:


I no know wetin de control people for nairaland.

I go soon leave this forum for una

No matter how bad your opinion is. It still matters.

Bluezy13:
Hmmm....
Your condition is called "Youthful Exuberance" and I'm positive that you will see things differently as you grow older.

I read it over and over, but I didn't see anywhere you mentioned the...your (you and your mom's) reason your father left you guys. And since he sends money, you never mentioned his own reasons for staying away.
If he never told you himself, you never mentioned the efforts you made to reach out to him either.

Maybe you...we...can start from there, as it is the primary concern.
As for your gay perception, it is secondary for now because your father has nothing to do with it.

Ok. The reason he left is for the name of work and it's 8 years now. We only hear him on phone. I don't even talk to him anymore

R2bees2:
You are 18 bro relax, as you grow older you'd realise that all these hate towards your dad is unnecessary. A change of environment will reset your brain, I mean away from your mum and sisters

Am thinking of that. Am in ND 1 and schooling from home. I don't know how to leave home to experience life outside

UpInTheSky:
You're simply yearning for a father figure in your life, that's all.
So long as you've no sexual thoughts about your Uncle or any other man, then you're fine.
As for you not having any gf so far, you're only 18, you're not supposed to have had any gf at 18.

Blaming your father for leaving (for reasons known to him) isn't doing you any good.
Making his leaving about you (he abandoned your whole family and not only you) also isn't doing you any good.
I understand you've felt abandoned by him and it's unfortunate he left y'all, but let that hurt go and start building your own life.

As for your Uncle, he has his own life to live and if he's getting married soon, don't rely on him too much, as you might be disappointed.
He's a good man if he has told you to focus on your education, asks about your well-being and checks on you, but aim to be your own man
and put your trust only in God and yourself, not anyone else.

God is the only one I trust. As for my dad he left in the name of work. My uncle said that I should always share him my problem and he'll find a solution. He sometimes talk about my dad being a good and busy man. But why would he be busy for even his family?

Alooone:
It's normal, u are simply yearning for a father figure in your life and somehow in ur subconscious u have seem to replace ur dad with him....now d issue of feeling gay it's simply ur dirty mind at work
...now back to d main issue...I want to advise u about your mum...U hv to understand that it's not easy for that woman...first your father and then you...U must learn how to lessen the load on your mother's head...forget what she said. In the past..U have to realise by virtue of your position in the family you have to lead those women right.

I am the 4th Child. I will try to hustle and make them happy. And like you said. My mom is really tired. She takes nearly everything on her head. Makes me wish I should die if I will be a father like my dad because I know what my mom goes through and won't like any woman to go through it

tee59:
Your uncle is already playing a father's role in your life. That's the point. You will understand more about life as you grow older.

I hope I will. I really want to be a good man and provide for the family or at least my family. All I want is a guide.

Gift96:
why you are feeling like that is because you grew up among women as the only boy. Somehow you have assimilated women's behavior and thought process. you need to stay in a house full of men to adjust your thought process and feelings

I don't know what it is to be among men but at least I won't have to be staying alone Right?

henrimoto:
as you grow older, you would begin to understand more about life. Pour out your heart to "this uncle of yours" , hear what advice he would give to you.

I always listen to him. And right now I'll say he's the only person I can't get angry with cause I owe him Alot. He help me in my academics and more

Naofumi:
Good Day everyone.
Everybody want care and love but that of the same-sex love is absolutely not accepted(I know that). I Choose to post this in the family section cause I think here have matured minds and People.
My Father have been really annoying and useless to me. I seriously hate him and wish I can change him but it's impossible, Either way, I Still Don't like him and never will.
My father left me/us when I was 10, the reason I said me is that I was the only male child. Growing up among 6 girls.
As I grow older, I realise every male child have needs his father to guide him to be a man, all of a sudden I developed hatred for my father and the whole family.
They get me upset with everything and make me do what I don't want to. I use to think if my dad was by me that shouldn't be happening or I rather want him to be the one to assign me.
NOTE: My dad travel and still haven't return he only call and sometimes send money that won't help at all.
I no longer want anything from him cause I think all I wanted was his presence, Advice and Guidance but he never gave me any attention.
Am currently 18 years old, young and somehow strong. But filled with hatred and anger for everyone. When I was 15 I was taken to the village, I don't like anybody but only someone that gave me Attention...... My Uncle. He is 35 years right now and might get married December this year or April.
He always ask if am Ok, and keep calling me his son..... He always congratulate me if I do things right. That's all I wanted to hear from my father.
My uncle made me stopped sleeping in same room with my mom or sisters saying am becoming a man I should not be with them, so I move to stay with him and his brother.
Since then he have been checking on me and asking me about my academic, giving me advice and all a father should give his son.
He made me feel alive that right now all I want is for me to be like his son I mean always with him. My mother stopped me from Working and now she's calling me weak. It makes me angry and hate everyone in the house, especially my dad that never care to find work for me.
Now even if I travel I use to stay with him cause I like it when he talks to me..... And the truth is I learn from him everyday.... Even think he and his friends talks about girls Alot.
I don't know if this is feelings or just happiness for what he Ave done for me. But right now, all I want is to be by his side. He appreciates my presence and work although I don't talk cause I was cut out from the environment by my mom in the name of DONT JOIN BAD BOYS.
I never had a girlfriend but I Ave 2 girls I crush on but don't talk about any cause he even told me to focus on education first.
Now my question is, is me being attached to him makes me like a Gay?
I never thought of any sexaul affairs with him all I want is for him to rub my hair when I do something good since that's what parents do to tell their children they're proud of them.
I Just don't know why he's always been on my mind. And I feel like I shouldn't leave him. Please why do I have such feelings?
I will accept of advice, insult and Suggestion.....

That's not how sexuality works man. There's nothing gay about wanting fatherly love,I had that and it was hell for me. You just want a father figure and it's valid

Naofumi:

I am the 4th Child. I will try to hustle and make them happy. And like you said. My mom is really tired. She takes nearly everything on her head. Makes me wish I should die if I will be a father like my dad because I know what my mom goes through and won't like any woman to go through it

Don't worry everything will be alright.

Flamemignon1:

That's not how sexuality works man. There's nothing gay about wanting fatherly love,I had that and it was hell for me. You just want a father figure and it's valid

Thank You. I only needed father love and Guidance to grow and be a good man.

Jay5mie:


I no know wetin de control people for nairaland.

I go soon leave this forum for una

This cracked me up

Bro, there is nothing in wrong.
All you have is a son to a Father figure feeling.
Not a sexual feeling.
Get much advice from him as much as you can.

Isn't that what you are getting?
And also listen to other wise old men as well.
Read their books and all.

Naofumi:
Good Day everyone.
Everybody want care and love but that of the same-sex love is absolutely not accepted(I know that). I Choose to post this in the family section cause I think here have matured minds and People.
My Father have been really annoying and useless to me. I seriously hate him and wish I can change him but it's impossible, Either way, I Still Don't like him and never will.
My father left me/us when I was 10, the reason I said me is that I was the only male child. Growing up among 6 girls.
As I grow older, I realise every male child have needs his father to guide him to be a man, all of a sudden I developed hatred for my father and the whole family.
They get me upset with everything and make me do what I don't want to. I use to think if my dad was by me that shouldn't be happening or I rather want him to be the one to assign me.
NOTE: My dad travel and still haven't return he only call and sometimes send money that won't help at all.
I no longer want anything from him cause I think all I wanted was his presence, Advice and Guidance but he never gave me any attention.
Am currently 18 years old, young and somehow strong. But filled with hatred and anger for everyone. When I was 15 I was taken to the village, I don't like anybody but only someone that gave me Attention...... My Uncle. He is 35 years right now and might get married December this year or April.
He always ask if am Ok, and keep calling me his son..... He always congratulate me if I do things right. That's all I wanted to hear from my father.
My uncle made me stopped sleeping in same room with my mom or sisters saying am becoming a man I should not be with them, so I move to stay with him and his brother.
Since then he have been checking on me and asking me about my academic, giving me advice and all a father should give his son.
He made me feel alive that right now all I want is for me to be like his son I mean always with him. My mother stopped me from Working and now she's calling me weak. It makes me angry and hate everyone in the house, especially my dad that never care to find work for me.
Now even if I travel I use to stay with him cause I like it when he talks to me..... And the truth is I learn from him everyday.... Even think he and his friends talks about girls Alot.
I don't know if this is feelings or just happiness for what he Ave done for me. But right now, all I want is to be by his side. He appreciates my presence and work although I don't talk cause I was cut out from the environment by my mom in the name of DONT JOIN BAD BOYS.
I never had a girlfriend but I Ave 2 girls I crush on but don't talk about any cause he even told me to focus on education first.
Now my question is, is me being attached to him makes me like a Gay?
I never thought of any sexaul affairs with him all I want is for him to rub my hair when I do something good since that's what parents do to tell their children they're proud of them.
I Just don't know why he's always been on my mind. And I feel like I shouldn't leave him. Please why do I have such feelings?
I will accept of advice, insult and Suggestion.....

Blue86:
Bro, there is nothing in wrong.
All you have is a son to a Father figure feeling.
Not a sexual feeling.
Get much advice from him as much as you can.

Isn't that what you are getting?
And also listen to other wise old men as well.
Read their books and all.

Yes. I will