Talking to strangers in a business context or a networking session can be scary because we’re worried about what to say, and we’re worried about being rejected or snubbed.



Maybe that hasn't occured to you yet as the reason why you're tongue tied in these situations, but for most people it doesn't get more basic than that.



So how do we get out of these situations? Or how do we plough through?



The solution to the problem is to realize that it’s not all about you!



The reason why you are being stymied right now is because your focus, your fears and apprehensions are all around YOU and what YOU ought to do next.



Instead of focusing on what to say, how to appear, or how you will be assessed, focus on the right kind of questions to ask to get the other person talking.



The first time you meet a total stranger whom you hope to do business with in the future, the goal should be to find out some more about this person and what the mutual opportunities are for the future.



You won't get any of this information if you spend most of the time running your mouth!



If you find ways to get this other person (potential customer, stakeholder, investor, etc) talking, then the chances are that you'll get some insight into who this person is, and what possible cards the future holds for you doing business together.



Apart from finding ways to get the other person talking, you ought to realize that even when you have been “rejected” it not personal.



They are only saying NO to your value proposition.



If someone rejects or rebuffs you in a networking session or a sales conversation or negotiation, they aren't rejecting you PERSONALLY, they are saying that the BUSINESS PROPOSITION at hand is of little value to them.



The rejection is hardly personal.



There might be times when YOU DEFINITELY ARE BEING REJECTED, but those are the rare circumstances where you have personal defects like being obnoxious, poor personal hygiene, inappropriate fashion sense, etc.



If that is the case, then you have a lot of work to do... but outside of those rare situations, don't take it personal.



Engage freely and confidently because even when you are rejected, it's never about you.