How Can You Tell Your Parents About Your Baby. - Family - Nairaland
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| How Can You Tell Your Parents About Your Baby. by Farid24224(m): 4:36pm On Sep 17, 2022 |
Please I really need help...I came from a Muslim family...My parents are strict, respected and religious. I have two siblings, am the only male...Our Parents suffered alot taking care of us from both strangers and within our relatives..We currently stay in Kaduna.. About 3 years ago, my Elder sister left the country to Turkey to study and she spent the rest of the years learning the language and working...My sister is someone everyone admire, she is joyful, respectful and really intelligent..Our Parents really admired her the most compared to me and my younger sister..She never did anything that made my Mom sad, she is a child every Mom wishes for.. After about a year after her departure everything changed, she's no longer that one's happy girl we knew...We don't talk frequently no more and she's no longer active on social media like before. I never suspected anything..Till when she got an accident a day before Eid..My mom became sick due to the tension and the problem...Both my mom and sis are suffering from BP complications. Then last week after my 20th birthday she was pressurizing me that she really wants to tell me something alone and I should never tell anyone about. I took it lightly but finally reached out to her today and then she told me she was pregnant..all this while and she has already given birth for her boyfriend...He's an Arab...I felt this cold compression on my heart, I couldn't say anything...She told me how she suffered a lot during her pregnancy...How she attempted to kill herself multiple times and that the accident she had was actually a suicidal attempt..She even wanted to abort the child but she couldn't because that's murder and she was convinced by her boyfriend and his parents.. During her late pregnancy period she suffered from life threatening situations to her and the baby due to depression and stress..She later gave birth to a girl..Her boyfriend's family took care of her during her postnatal period. She told me how she suffered and had her baby removed from her to save both their lifes...That when she was moved for operation the thoughts on her mind that what if she dies, what will she tell God...The baby was born prematurely and spent 90 days in an incubator..She told me how painful it is to give birth without mummy knowing about it all this while..How is she going to tell our mum that she's a mother...After the trust, the pain, sacrifice that she made to take her to school... Coupled with our mom's health... Please Nairaland brothers and sisters..Am just 20 years old, I have never felt this immatured and helpless before...Am feeling scared and shaky and haven't eaten anything today...How can we tell our parents about what happened..My sister is 22..Am sorry if I typed some words wrong, am just so tired.. Mods please I beg you!! 2 Likes |
| Re: How Can You Tell Your Parents About Your Baby. by Nobody: 4:40pm On Sep 17, 2022 |
You don kuku pour everything hear so paraventure your sis or parent sees it then that's f##ked.. Well what your sister have to do is tell your parent,as far as the guy no reject pregnancy no wam. Ogbeni leave religion and stop shaking, she's an adult so nothing dey sup, except your parent are extremist. Na because of your parent she attempt to commit suicide because normally una religion fit forbid something like that. Abeg call your sister and lend a helping hand here,let her know you got her back. 2 Likes |
| Re: How Can You Tell Your Parents About Your Baby. by Jashub: 4:40pm On Sep 17, 2022 |
My brother, the deed has been done and there is little or nothing you can do about it other than live with the consequences . As for your mother, the best advice I can give is for you to be honest enough to tell her truth about what has happened. Because sooner or later she will find out, and that would be worse than anything you can possibly imagine right now. But start by telling her the truth in the presence of of well respected people in the family(preferably elders or religious clerics). That way, the shock and worry would be something bearable for you and her  1 Like |
| Re: How Can You Tell Your Parents About Your Baby. by Zonefree(m): 4:43pm On Sep 17, 2022 |
. Am feeling scared and shaky and haven't eaten anything today.. A 22-year-old girl gave birth and you're scared and shaky Guy, your sister is already a baby mama, there's no need for you to starve yourself over nothing. She's fine with her baby and Bobo. Concentrate on your own life. 2 Likes |
| Re: How Can You Tell Your Parents About Your Baby. by robinso01(m): 4:48pm On Sep 17, 2022 |
You just have to tell your parents one or the other. |
| Re: How Can You Tell Your Parents About Your Baby. by Farid24224(m): 4:48pm On Sep 17, 2022 |
Zonefree: I can't just sit tight when she's going through this pain and stress... |
| Re: How Can You Tell Your Parents About Your Baby. by Nobody: 4:48pm On Sep 17, 2022 |
Zonefree:Na the parent em dey reason,you know say for Islam na abomi. 2 Likes |
| Re: How Can You Tell Your Parents About Your Baby. by Zonefree(m): 4:50pm On Sep 17, 2022 |
Farid24224:She's gone past the pains and stress level. She's enjoying her new born baby and probably planning on having another one. Chill guy. 2 Likes |
| Re: How Can You Tell Your Parents About Your Baby. by Farid24224(m): 4:55pm On Sep 17, 2022 |
Zonefree: She's not...She called me today that's a day after the baby left the hospital..She just can't find a way to tell our parents... |
| Re: How Can You Tell Your Parents About Your Baby. by advanceDNA: 4:59pm On Sep 17, 2022 |
Farid24224: What pain and stress?? Its been three months since the baby came She has a baby... Baby is fine Boyfriend and his family accept her and takes care of her.....what the problem here?? Just ask her if you can help her tell your mum...if she says yes or no...still tell your mum...as she has a right to know..the earlier the better....u can tell one of the elders at home like your mum's younger or elder sister to make it easy breaking it to your mum 2 Likes |
| Re: How Can You Tell Your Parents About Your Baby. by MrBrownJay1(m): 5:01pm On Sep 17, 2022 |
tell your sister:" you either tell mom NOW or i will, as you have NO RIGHT TO GO THROUGH THIS NIGHTMARE BY YOURSELF! 2 Likes |
| Re: How Can You Tell Your Parents About Your Baby. by juman(m): 5:03pm On Sep 17, 2022 |
Don't worry your mind, from what you wrote she and the baby are fine. Telling the parents can wait a bit. I believe they would be happy to meet their granddaughter. 2 Likes |
| Re: How Can You Tell Your Parents About Your Baby. by Kobojunkiee: 5:15pm On Sep 17, 2022 |
Farid24224:We? Who we? Na both of you carry the pregnancy? Dude, this is your sister's problem and it is her place to let your parents know. It is not your business and so you shouldn't be carrying it on your head as though it is. By the way, are you saying you learned that she is pregnant today, meaning this is the second child she is having with her Arab boyfriend at this time? |
| Re: How Can You Tell Your Parents About Your Baby. by Farid24224(m): 5:16pm On Sep 17, 2022 |
advanceDNA: Okay...I should ask her first...You think so right? |
| Re: How Can You Tell Your Parents About Your Baby. by Mindlog: 5:18pm On Sep 17, 2022 |
The 2 positives, she is alive and so is the baby. Let her video call your mum, she no kill person. After asking of everyone, she should tell your mum of her granddaughter and make sure the video call is when the baby is awake, so your mum can see her smiles.....your mum's heart will melt and will take it up from there. 1 Like |
| Re: How Can You Tell Your Parents About Your Baby. by Kobojunkiee: 5:18pm On Sep 17, 2022 |
Farid24224:You are not responsible for your sister's life and decisions... she has her own mouth and she has to tell your parents by herself. 1 Like |
| Re: How Can You Tell Your Parents About Your Baby. by Farid24224(m): 5:18pm On Sep 17, 2022 |
Kobojunkiee: No she isn't..I have a really close bond with my sister...She tells me everything and her slightest or biggest problem is definitely mine too.. 1 Like |
| Re: How Can You Tell Your Parents About Your Baby. by Kobojunkiee: 5:23pm On Sep 17, 2022 |
Farid24224:I understand the closeness you two share... but it is not your place to announce the news to your parents. She needs to be the one to tell her story to your parents and allow them to get it straight from her. Your sister unburdened after all this while to you, great! Now, she needs to do the same with her parents. 2 Likes |
| Re: How Can You Tell Your Parents About Your Baby. by Farid24224(m): 5:25pm On Sep 17, 2022 |
Kobojunkiee: Okay thanks for the advice..Am really grateful!! 1 Like |
| Re: How Can You Tell Your Parents About Your Baby. by 2Radii: 5:32pm On Sep 17, 2022 |
Farid24224:One tin I hate is this How come u forget Ur father in all this hiasco?? Ok mama will feel bad, agreed, is it dad that will feel good about it?? Mum cater for her yes agree, was Ur father an imbecilê that he was so handicapped to have impact in her life? So in one world now, u re all concerned about how mum will feel and not bothered about how dad would feel cus it was Ur mother that sent her to turkiye and not Ur father. Well, Goan tell Ur mum about everything then, pls leave ur father behind and don't tell him anything as he's not even in the picture. Mummy this mummy that..mtcheew. and if we look well now, na father dey incure all the debts and stress just to make sure she travel out ooh. |
| Re: How Can You Tell Your Parents About Your Baby. by Kobojunkiee: 5:35pm On Sep 17, 2022 |
Farid24224:She ought to do it herself out of respect for your parents. 1 Like |
| Re: How Can You Tell Your Parents About Your Baby. by Farid24224(m): 5:36pm On Sep 17, 2022 |
Kobojunkiee: I will tell her that... 1 Like |
| Re: How Can You Tell Your Parents About Your Baby. by Farid24224(m): 5:45pm On Sep 17, 2022 |
2Radii: The reason why I emphasized on our mom is because she's so emotional compared to my dad...My dad is strong and he can take almost anything..When my sister was admitted he was just cool throughout while my mom was already wailing.. 2 Likes |
| Re: How Can You Tell Your Parents About Your Baby. by advanceDNA: 6:11pm On Sep 17, 2022 |
Farid24224: Yes naaa....ask your sister.....advice her that the best thing will be to tell yor parents but that u want to get her permission and that you know how to tell your parents that they wont be angry.. |
| Re: How Can You Tell Your Parents About Your Baby. by 2Radii: 6:23pm On Sep 17, 2022 |
Farid24224: See, u will soon become a family man, Ur dad keeping quiet does not mean he's a wood, he has emotions. Ur mum showing her emotions does not mean she palpitate more than ur father. Men go tru tins. Don't assume for us, let us tell u ourselves. Well, to the subject matter, Ur sister is 22 and ripe for men already, afterall nobody raped her, and she was not blind Wen she was opening her legs, and we thank God she and her daughter her alive, the boyfriend and his family didn't deny her as well, so why unnecessary pressure?? |
| Re: How Can You Tell Your Parents About Your Baby. by fyzaila: 7:22pm On Sep 17, 2022 |
Is the baby daddy planning on marrying her? If yes then at least it will be easier to come up to your mum with the marriage idea. If not, then you'll have to go through your dad since according to you he his more calmer and can contain his emotions. After relating it to your dad, let your dad tell your mum himself in any way he can. How about her studies now? Is she making progress in it? At least let it not be that she went to carry belle instead of studying. |
| Re: How Can You Tell Your Parents About Your Baby. by Nicepoker(m): 8:02pm On Sep 17, 2022 |
Op are you the father of the child? Why are you so worried. |
| Re: How Can You Tell Your Parents About Your Baby. by Amopeekun(f): 8:35pm On Sep 17, 2022 |
I understand where you are coming from- the pain, the disappointment, the disgrace, after all the sufferings and expectations! It's very painful! Being Muslims and getting to know your daughter has a baby before her dowry is paid, can be very excruciating. The knowledge can be very devastating for your parents but you must tell them now and not later. It's her responsibility to tell your parents everything but because she is not home and you are close, you may come in for her. But, please do so in the presence of someone who is closest to your family, someone who loves your family. And you need to be very tactful and careful with your words. It's important to let them know Allah has the final say on everyone's destiny... Encourage them to be forgiving. This will prevent further calamity. Please pray about it too. All the best |
| Re: How Can You Tell Your Parents About Your Baby. by ZIMDRILL(m): 10:34pm On Sep 17, 2022 |
Farid24224: let your sister tell her own story by herself yes you are worrier as brother thats OK but she open the legs herself its her story to tell 2 Likes |
| Re: How Can You Tell Your Parents About Your Baby. by sylve11: 7:50am On Sep 18, 2022 |
Religion? Fear am!   |
| Re: How Can You Tell Your Parents About Your Baby. by Nobody: 9:15am On Sep 18, 2022 |
I don't have an opinion on this tbh! 1 Like |
| Re: How Can You Tell Your Parents About Your Baby. by advanceDNA: 9:37am On Sep 18, 2022 |
sylve11: How is this a religious problem??....them send pikin go school ...e go fvck carry belle and is now afraid to tell her parents....this is normal human feeling of letting those that held her on high standards down....... 1 Like |
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