Should I Bring Him Over To Canada? - Travel

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Should I Bring Him Over To Canada? - Travel - Nairaland

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Should I Bring Him Over To Canada? by Confusedgirlie: 4:52am On Oct 12, 2022

I knew him before leaving the country. He was in Nigeria and was doing quite okay, even though I was earning more than him.

We separated for a while since I wanted to focus a little on my new life. But recently, we connected again. I'm just realizing I still have something for him in spite of the time and distance. But I'm really confused about starting anything because it will mean that I have to bring him over.

What are the chances he won't take advantage of me?

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Re: Should I Bring Him Over To Canada? by chigoziri2403(m): 5:03am On Oct 12, 2022

What is your aim of bringing him to Canada
To be your errand boy and Tomboy?
And make him sleep outside anytime you have any misunderstanding
Loneliness has hit you, you are now remembering the people you dumped

434 Likes 19 Shares

Re: Should I Bring Him Over To Canada? by Nobody: 5:19am On Oct 12, 2022

Not everyone is like saro in Anikulapo movie

Pray about it and if he has no questionable characters... you Good to go.

255 Likes 16 Shares

Re: Should I Bring Him Over To Canada? by Nobody: 5:47am On Oct 12, 2022

And what package do you have for him soon as he arrives? If you're not the type that go on wailing and cursing men with the "after all I did for him" then I suggest you weigh the situation. If the cost outweighs the benefits, then you know what to do.

Meanwhile, I can't really understand why a man will leave his home for a woman. Never a good move to make. It should be the other way round

Commissionguru:

Sapa never sapalize you.

Old things have passed away, behold all things have become new.

Berankis:

What is this one saying? "Why a man will leave his hone for a woman". So if your girlfriend invites you to Canada, you won't go? Except you have something really worth it here.

This is exactly why men shouldn't leave their home to go join a woman especially when they are building something stable. From the thinking of these two, you can be assured that they will fully depend and hope to be fed by a woman.

If you're a man with a tail between your legs, don't think like this. It's the fastest way to lose your self respect and worth. Build yourself up, set standards and any woman who doesn't meet those standards should be left alone.

202 Likes 3 Shares

Re: Should I Bring Him Over To Canada? by superCleanworks(m): 6:26am On Oct 12, 2022

Confusedgirlie:
I knew him before leaving the country. He was in Nigeria and was doing quite okay, even though I was earning more than him. We separated for a while since I wanted to focus a little on my new life. But recently, we connected again. I'm just realizing I still have something for him in spite of the time and distance. But I'm really confused about starting anything because it will mean that I have to bring him over. What are the chances he won't take advantage of me?

Amazing!
somehow you just had to announce that you earned more than him. I wonder the relevance of that information in relation to the matter at hand.
Secondly, you declared here that YOU still have feelings for him. Did he ever beg or ask you for travel assistance? Or you just want to keep him close to you and keep reminding him of how LARGE your earning is and how you are the alpha and omega that BROUGHT HIM OVER.
Do you genuinely desire him or just want to fulfil your own desire. What about what he wants?
Take advantage of you? Please save yourself the self imposed trauma and leave that guy alone let him enjoy his peace of mind than to be around a woman who is already standing on RED ALERT because she has all the ADVANTAGE that every man wants to take.
you really need to work on your state of paranoia. do not drag the man into it abeg.

I wonder what your level of panic and self consciousness would be like if you were even a quarter of Ngozi Okonji or Kristalina Georgieva.

Even billionaires like Dangote still get favours from women in higher places but here you are feeling like fresh meat pie.

I feel so sorry for men that stand under the umbrella of such women. It would be far better to stand in the rain.

232 Likes 14 Shares

Re: Should I Bring Him Over To Canada? by superCleanworks(m): 6:31am On Oct 12, 2022

chigoziri2403:
What is your aim of bringing him to Canada

she is probably full of konji and wants to keep him around in the house as a steady human dillllldo and keep him locked so he does not ever get any job opportunities that would pay more than hers or God forbid he meets other people that could enhance him in life as this would be summed up as TAKING ADVANTAGE OF HER.

I wonder what this world has turned to.

52 Likes 5 Shares

Re: Should I Bring Him Over To Canada? by Freestainworld(m): 6:36am On Oct 12, 2022

If you want to help me him, you do it without no strings, the Bobo no be your husband oo.

19 Likes 2 Shares

Re: Should I Bring Him Over To Canada? by Jimmythewise: 6:40am On Oct 12, 2022

The answer is yes.

That being said, do it as a favor. Expect nothing in return, that's how to overcome disappointment before it happens. If he is wise you won't regret it.

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Re: Should I Bring Him Over To Canada? by superCleanworks(m): 6:45am On Oct 12, 2022

Jimmythewise:
The answer is yes.

That being said, do it as a favor. Expect nothing in return, that's how to overcome disappointment before it happens. If he is wise you won't regret it.

I disagree, she better let him enjoy his peace of mind.
She will choke the guy. Even if the guy is a good person, she will make him bad with this her I EARN MORE THAN YOU AND I DO NOT WANT YOU TO TAKE ADVANTAGE OF ME mentality. You can never be a good person around such paranoid women. Even if you buy a new shirt, you have taken advantage.

Yes I have gotten good contracts and connections from women that pushed me in the right direction and I thank God for them. if that was not advantage, then I wonder what to call it.
I pray my woman gets 5 times richer than me because she will gladly let me take advantage for us to get more growth. Not selfish thinkers like this one who feels she has made it in life with a little change in location.

41 Likes 2 Shares

Re: Should I Bring Him Over To Canada? by 1x2x3: 7:00am On Oct 12, 2022

Confusedgirlie:
I knew him before leaving the country. He was in Nigeria and was doing quite okay, even though I was earning more than him. We separated for a while since I wanted to focus a little on my new life. But recently, we connected again. I'm just realizing I still have something for him in spite of the time and distance. But I'm really confused about starting anything because it will mean that I have to bring him over. What are the chances he won't take advantage of me?

Help without expectations or don't help at all.

20 Likes

Re: Should I Bring Him Over To Canada? by mrblessed(m): 7:06am On Oct 12, 2022

Bring him over or not, I think you still need him, that's the reason for the recollection in the first place. Or is the alleged boredom Nigerian ladies suffer in Canada the reason for bringing him over? Ruminate deeply on it.

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Re: Should I Bring Him Over To Canada? by surgevessel: 7:15am On Oct 12, 2022

Confusedgirlie:
I knew him before leaving the country. He was in Nigeria and was doing quite okay, even though I was earning more than him. We separated for a while since I wanted to focus a little on my new life. But recently, we connected again. I'm just realizing I still have something for him in spite of the time and distance. But I'm really confused about starting anything because it will mean that I have to bring him over. What are the chances he won't take advantage of me?

You will subconsciously abuse the man in the end. Go and write it down.

At first, you are trying to spy before rendering a favour that should have been willingly done without expecting return.

Secondly, you would go extra mile and causing all kinds of frustration for the guy to see you as a small god.

We have seen similar cases, they claim they dont need a man in their lives but they are not even capable of logical evaluation on decisions.

If it's a business that you would bring him and he wouldn't have to look at any other person nor move freely or be binded to your orders, spell it out and avoid potential issues that may ruin whatever you shared together in the past.

Let him know conditions surrounding your bringing him to Canada. If it's a give and take thing as business let both party understand.
If it is a favour, then you should zero your mind and do it without expecting returns. If on his own he wants to compliment the favour and remain loyal to you, so be it.

My humble piece.

75 Likes 4 Shares

Re: Should I Bring Him Over To Canada? by NwaliE01: 7:15am On Oct 12, 2022

Confusedgirlie:
I knew him before leaving the country. He was in Nigeria and was doing quite okay, even though I was earning more than him. We separated for a while since I wanted to focus a little on my new life. But recently, we connected again. I'm just realizing I still have something for him in spite of the time and distance. But I'm really confused about starting anything because it will mean that I have to bring him over. What are the chances he won't take advantage of me?

My dear, to get husband abroad hard oh. If you have chance with him, give it a try but be wise not be used. You get what i mean? You might not know if he will . . . because no one knows the heart of man except God.

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Re: Should I Bring Him Over To Canada? by Nobody: 8:44am On Oct 12, 2022

Your tale will end up like that of the men that take women abroad. If you won't feel bad and used if he leaves you, you may or may not take him. But if you'll feel bad, don't take him.

5 Likes 1 Share

Re: Should I Bring Him Over To Canada? by NoToPile: 9:03am On Oct 12, 2022

Lool why so much wailing on some posts.

she asked a legit question 'what are the chances he won't take advantage of me' which is not out of place and is a very valid question.

They have not even started the relationship proper yet, she knows if they start something that will lead to something better (I am saying marriage) he may have to come over eventually or she will have to come back to Naija, it's either of the two

If it's a guy asking this question you all will be saying how a man shouldn't bring a lady over blablabla how she will turn to a monster now its the other way around.....

Well Confusedgirlie my half sister brought her husband to Canada she's a Canadian citizen and had left Naija for Canada since 1996, they had known since her uni days and they got married here in Naija 2007, both left for Canada and as far as I know they are doing fine, So it works for some people,

Do note that they got married before they both moved.

But well shine your eyes, and only God knows the thought and the intents of the heart so your concerns are not out of place.

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Re: Should I Bring Him Over To Canada? by SonOfEl(m): 10:18am On Oct 12, 2022

Confusedgirlie:
I knew him before leaving the country. He was in Nigeria and was doing quite okay, even though I was earning more than him. We separated for a while since I wanted to focus a little on my new life. But recently, we connected again. I'm just realizing I still have something for him in spite of the time and distance. But I'm really confused about starting anything because it will mean that I have to bring him over. What are the chances he won't take advantage of me?

There are grey areas in your story.

How did you suddenly realize you STILL had a thing for him after separating in the name of "I don turn janded babe"?

He is now an afterthought after you tried in futility to grab a new "overseas" dude.

If you truly love him, come home let him marry you properly before you both jet off as a couple. Overseas no dey shak people like before o...

43 Likes 1 Share

Re: Should I Bring Him Over To Canada? by Richy4(m): 10:20am On Oct 12, 2022

People take risks everyday... even the cars we drive or enter into is risk on its own... what is the probability that the break won't fail while in motion...

Take the risk my dear girl.. he might be the real deal...

11 Likes

Re: Should I Bring Him Over To Canada? by Mercury12(m): 10:49am On Oct 12, 2022

Confusedgirlie:
I knew him before leaving the country. He was in Nigeria and was doing quite okay, even though I was earning more than him. We separated for a while since I wanted to focus a little on my new life. But recently, we connected again. I'm just realizing I still have something for him in spite of the time and distance. But I'm really confused about starting anything because it will mean that I have to bring him over. What are the chances he won't take advantage of me?

if you won't start nagging and abusing him in Canada then go ahead and do it.
Some women are something else when they do little thing for a man. They will keep rubbing it on his face for years and run their husband into depression. Lotta plenty stories like that

4 Likes

Re: Should I Bring Him Over To Canada? by NemoDatQuod(m): 11:10am On Oct 12, 2022

If I understand you clearly, you have just told us you are planning to take advantage of a brother. Then you turn around to ask us about the chances of he himself also taking advantage of you?

I'm clapping and dancing for and with you.
Because you live in Canada, you think you will be doing him a favour by bringing him over. I've lived in several different countries in the Western World. Sometimes, it can be a disadvantage to pluck someone from their friends and cultural orientation to an environment where they are actually designed not to ever excel. It takes the exceptional to overcome that. It may be that you will be doing him a disservice.

If you are lonely, like a large number of Africans abroad, go home. If you want to bring him over, do that with loads of respect and self dignity that a wife is required to display towards her husband. Else, you know where this will head to....

Confusedgirlie:
I knew him before leaving the country. He was in Nigeria and was doing quite okay, even though I was earning more than him. We separated for a while since I wanted to focus a little on my new life. But recently, we connected again. I'm just realizing I still have something for him in spite of the time and distance. But I'm really confused about starting anything because it will mean that I have to bring him over. What are the chances he won't take advantage of me?

34 Likes 2 Shares

Re: Should I Bring Him Over To Canada? by 2dice01: 11:32am On Oct 12, 2022

Lmao
You earn more than him grin

We know already

He never forced you to help him
You are doing it outta Love

We don't wanna hear i help him from nothing in the nearest future

Cus this particular Business you are trying to venture might work or not

If it does Congrats
if it doesn't abeg no deport the Bros oo cheesy

9 Likes

Re: Should I Bring Him Over To Canada? by Nobody: 11:36am On Oct 12, 2022

Make sure
1. He's not seeing anyone else in Nigeria.
2. He has no wife and/or kids in Nigeria.
3. He's of sound character/has no bad qualities (e.g. abusive, liar, lazy, sexist, narcissistic)
4. He will make an excellent husband & father

You would have to marry him in Nigeria before sponsoring him.
It's a risky and huge thing to do for a [Nigerian] man.
Only you will bear the consequences should things go haywire.
Thread carefully.

21 Likes 1 Share

Re: Should I Bring Him Over To Canada? by Richy4(m): 11:58am On Oct 12, 2022

TooMuchJuice:
Make sure
1. He's not seeing anyone else in Nigeria.
2. He has no wife and/or kids in Nigeria.
3. He's of sound character/has no bad qualities (e.g. abusive, liar, lazy, sexist, narcissistic)
4. He will make an excellent husband & father

You would have to marry him in Nigeria before sponsoring him.
It's a risky and huge thing to do for a [Nigerian] man.
Only you will bear the consequences should things go haywire.
Thread carefully.

I don't mean to quote you. I just did based on your comment (red ink)... why do you feel it's a big deal for a lady to take a Nigerian man abroad.... but Many Nigerian men have been doing/done it and some are even planning to do it... why should one raise a dust when it comes to female doing it...but if it's a man, it's normal?

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Re: Should I Bring Him Over To Canada? by NoToPile: 12:05pm On Oct 12, 2022

Richy4:

I don't mean to quote you. I just did based on your comment (red ink)... why do you feel it's a big deal for a lady to take a Nigerian man abroad.... but Many Nigerian men have been done it and some are even planning to do it... why should one raise a dust when it comes to female doing it...but if it's a man, it's normal?

Read some comments of your fellow Nigerian gender, how they are already saying she's taking advantage of the man, how she will nag him, how she will choke him, how she will make him see her as a small God, how she will subconsciously abuse him, how she did not beg him for assiatnce all sorts then you will understand why the person you quoted stated that point.

Some just can't cope when they get help from a woman.

They didn't even consider that she has asked a very valid question.

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Re: Should I Bring Him Over To Canada? by Richy4(m): 12:28pm On Oct 12, 2022

NoToPile:

Read some comments of your fellow Nigerian gender, how they are already saying she's taking advantage of the man, how she will nag him, how she will choke him, how she will make him see her as a small God, how she will subconsciously abuse him, how she did not beg him for assiatnce all sorts then you will understand why the person you quoted stated that point.

They didn't even consider that she has asked a very valid question.

The way u interpreted it and said "my gender" is funny...
I believe that my gender sometimes are on the war part and also looking out for each other as per bro code ...
I agreed with you that she asked a valid question and I really liked the fact that she was thinking toward the direction of solidifying the relationship.....

What I liked more was the fact that they parted ways previously without fuse...It's something that is commendable in my opinion... If she knows the guy very well, she should know what he can and cannot do.. though human are unpredictable... if she doesn't take that risk, she will never find out if he was real or not

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Re: Should I Bring Him Over To Canada? by Corporate2020: 12:36pm On Oct 12, 2022

Confusedgirlie:
I knew him before leaving the country. He was in Nigeria and was doing quite okay, even though I was earning more than him. We separated for a while since I wanted to focus a little on my new life. But recently, we connected again. I'm just realizing I still have something for him in spite of the time and distance. But I'm really confused about starting anything because it will mean that I have to bring him over. What are the chances he won't take advantage of me?

He has not asked you to bring him over because he is not an item you bring over. Just as you stated, he is doing okay for himself, so he doesn't need the small change you are making. He is also not in need of a wife. You are the desperate and pathetic one here. So, go and continue in your Freezing state.

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Re: Should I Bring Him Over To Canada? by NoToPile: 1:36pm On Oct 12, 2022

Richy4:

The way interpreted it and said "my gender" is funny...
I believe that my gender sometimes are on the war part and also looking out for each other as per bro code ...
I agreed with you that she asked a valid question and I really liked the fact that she was thinking toward the direction of solidifying the relationship.....

What I liked more was the fact that they parted ways previously without fuse...It's something that is commendable in my opinion... If she knows the guy very well, she should know what he can and cannot do.. though human are unpredictable... if she doesn't take that risk, she will never find out if he was real or not

let them continue to look out for each other.

Is it not a bit odd that the same question many of your gender have asked about bringing a woman abroad ( with the no don't try it response by the majority) is still the same question she's asking and interestingly shes getting a backlash from your gender. Your gender are very hypocritical on NL sha.

Just wait for it more are coming If this thread gets to FP.

People have done it and people will still do it, both male and female besides it does make sense for a married couple to be together .

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Re: Should I Bring Him Over To Canada? by Clinghton: 1:39pm On Oct 12, 2022

If you are not in love with him bring him and set him on his path.

1 Like

Re: Should I Bring Him Over To Canada? by faithfull18(f): 1:44pm On Oct 12, 2022

Corporate2020:

He has not asked you to bring him over because he is not an item you bring over. Just as you stated, he is doing okay for himself, so he doesn't need the small change you are making. He is also not in need of a wife. You are the desperate and pathetic one here. So, go and continue in your Freezing state.

we know your type, Mr. Macho on NL and you are in some girl's DM acting all jelly, continue.

6 Likes

Re: Should I Bring Him Over To Canada? by WantsandMore: 2:33pm On Oct 12, 2022

Confusedgirlie:
I knew him before leaving the country. He was in Nigeria and was doing quite okay, even though I was earning more than him. We separated for a while since I wanted to focus a little on my new life. But recently, we connected again. I'm just realizing I still have something for him in spite of the time and distance. But I'm really confused about starting anything because it will mean that I have to bring him over. What are the chances he won't take advantage of me?

Before you make any dumb moves, do you intend to get married to him and may that be the reason fueling your feelings and reasons to relocate him? Ask him about marriage and settling down, it's advisable y'all get married before he comes over. Genesis 2:24 ... if your reasons aren't any of the above, perhaps out of altruism or whatever, state your terms and proceed. Whatever happens next will be a life lesson for you.

3 Likes

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