Re: My 16 Year Old Live-in Maid Is Pregnant For A 20 Year Old Boy by Emperor88(m): 6:06pm On Oct 29, 2022 |
DSS1335:
Thank you for your honest advise.
We have been able to trace through the help of the estate caretaker and contacted her aunty who was their grandmother's point of contact in PH through out their 3 months stay. She has accepted to help us mediate in the case, she will inform her Mother (the boy's grandma) and her sister(the boy's mother) about all that transpired. That the boy lives with his parents in Obigbo before ABA. If all efforts to resolve this case peacefully fails, i will file for statutory rape charge.
This doesn't make any sense! What will she gain for withholding such a very sensitive information from us?
When she was in SS1, i was forced to change her school after 3rd term, she confided in my wife that one of her male teacher was giving her undue attention to the point of inviting her to his house coupled with the fact that senior boys in her school were also disturbing her.
This girl doesn't lack anything, whatever she needs or payment that comes, we clear it. We live comfortably in my 3 bedroom flat. She has her own room, i don't allow her to watch any kind of indecent movie or music by ensuring that such channels are under lock filtering out only cartoon, starlife, zeeworld, and other children friendly channels. my wife has her room but we sleep together with our 2 kids.
Sometimes in June, my wife went through her phone call history, she receives call only from the guy constantly and other female friends whom we assumed were her classmates. we inquired what association she has with this boy that calls her all time even at odd hours of the night. we knew something wasnt ok as WhatsApp chat and sms were deleted. She wasn't allowed to use Facebook as we tried our best to keep her under close watch. On weekends, in our presence, she isn't allowed to use phone as my wife always hold it. What else could we have done. Our best wasn't enough i guess! And yes, my wife taught her sex education, i guess she was just too stupid, gullible, naive to fall for whatever the boy said. This a big lesson to all parents. We have learnt ours in a very hard way You haven't learnt anything sir...The fact that you allow a 13/16 year old decive you says it all. You will be shocked to know that the girl have multiple sex partners. Just because she reported a teacher to you, why did she not report the boy to you when he was making advances at her? That by the way. It is disheartening that you and a lot of people in this forum did not see anything wrong in hiring a 13 years old as maid in this 21st century. If you want to help, why not just adopt her, why must she work for you at that age? As for the pregnancy, she is the only one who can help with the location of the boy, if the guy had unprotected sex with her then the guy should be the one to prove that he is not the one responsible for it. If parents can fail with their own child , I'm not surprised you fail with someone else's child. |
Re: My 16 Year Old Live-in Maid Is Pregnant For A 20 Year Old Boy by pocohantas(f): 6:12pm On Oct 29, 2022 |
NoToPile:
Well a lot of times these things don't happen as a direct maid sort of thing, it always start with one person saying let my daughter live with you people and you take care of her education feeding and all to them its one burden less.
So the girl lives with them and they send her to school, she takes care of the younger ones as siblings also does chores
Some of these situations is kind of similar to the nwa boy matter. Lots of girls who had no hope or means as a result of the poverty level of their parents have made something out of their lives from such arrangements.
9 out of 10 times these arrangements are as a result of poverty, like the scenerio of this girl /family the OP painted. Let nobody’s child live with me. A lot of times it starts as a maid. Most Nigerians actually go out to seek these kids from poor homes. It is the reason it is common among lower middle class homes. They don’t take these kids when they are single, it is until they are married with need for a nanny for house chores and babysitting that they automatically remember this arrangement. The rich do not have people’s kids living with them because they can afford cooks and drivers. If they are so nice, they embark on direct philanthropy and sponsorship of educations. It would never be right to me… |
Re: My 16 Year Old Live-in Maid Is Pregnant For A 20 Year Old Boy by kayperry: 6:12pm On Oct 29, 2022 |
pocohantas: This is another reason I don’t endorse underaged maid. Nothing on this earth can ever make it appealing to me.
If you are not 22yrs and above, I have no business with you. Shalom! Recap; A evening newspaper finally ties a man down @ 49yrs and she decides to get a fresh maiden as maid .... sounds like a perfect compensation 1 Like
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Re: My 16 Year Old Live-in Maid Is Pregnant For A 20 Year Old Boy by VirileNelly2420: 6:13pm On Oct 29, 2022 |
PJtech: Lack of supervision from parent/guardian. A girl got 5month pregnant under ur roof, you negleted ur guardian role(ur wife should take 90% of the blame)
do have a talk with ur wife, never leave ur kids with same fate as this poor girl.... Learn from this mistake Which supervision are I talking about? ...sth wey fit take less dan 5mins? If Heaven dey, even for there, angels fit dey get Belle... Na becos say she get Belle? Even ur own pikin or sister wey never get Belle fit dey run tins pass her. No b so o! |
Re: My 16 Year Old Live-in Maid Is Pregnant For A 20 Year Old Boy by nedekid: 6:21pm On Oct 29, 2022 |
Richy4:
Sorry to say this but I don't agree with your friend especially with the red ink ...
U can't administer anything like contraceptive injection to a minor that is not your child without getting the parent's consent... Or without the child even knowing what you were doing... It's wrong in all ramifications... Let's just say he said that under the influence of alcohol ![smiley](https://www.nairaland.com/faces/smiley.png)
My bro it is wrong, we know. But ultimately one is helping the person. Could it be considered different from condoms etc? After all there is no age limit to which a person can buy condoms abroad. Even in western countries, a doctor or nurse will administer contraceptives to even a 13 year old with strict guidelines not to inform the parents. Anyway I concur with you it seems to be unethical. (alcohol tins). |
Re: My 16 Year Old Live-in Maid Is Pregnant For A 20 Year Old Boy by Father4all: 6:21pm On Oct 29, 2022 |
The pregnancy is yours ![grin](https://www.nairaland.com/faces/grin.png) |
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Re: My 16 Year Old Live-in Maid Is Pregnant For A 20 Year Old Boy by Annahh(f): 6:26pm On Oct 29, 2022 |
That's how one 14 years old girl I know got pregnant, she got pregnant in her JSS3, the worst part is that an old man with grown up children is the one that got her pregnant, whether he used jazz on her is what I still can't comprehend, well she dropped out of school and her mum struggles to pay her school fees cause she is a petty trader. Close your legs and zip up, they won't hear. It is well. |
Re: My 16 Year Old Live-in Maid Is Pregnant For A 20 Year Old Boy by NoToPile: 6:27pm On Oct 29, 2022 |
pocohantas:
Let nobody’s child live with me. A lot of times it starts as a maid. Most Nigerians actually go out to seek these kids from poor homes. It is the reason it is common among lower middle class homes. They don’t take these kids when they are single, it is until they are married with need for a nanny for house chores and babysitting that they automatically remember this arrangement. The rich do not have people’s kids living with them because they can afford cooks and drivers. If they are so nice, they embark on direct philanthropy and sponsorship of educations.
It would never be right to me… I get your point sha but then even some rich people do have people's children living with them whom they sponsor through school / trade despite their cooks, maids, driver and all its still the please same help me train my child arrangement which the root cause is poverty. Anyway I am of the opinion that children should live with their parents but these things happen a lot. 1 Like |
Re: My 16 Year Old Live-in Maid Is Pregnant For A 20 Year Old Boy by Gentlechika(m): 6:27pm On Oct 29, 2022 |
mariahAngel:
You are disrespectful and a bully. You ought to be ashamed of yourself!
Also, you didn't make any sense. Not then, and certainly not now.
Your wish is to silence females, and that is never going to be possible. Everyone has the right to an opinion, but (some of) you hate it when females give their opinions. I will continue to "shalaye", whether you like it or not. Shalom |
Re: My 16 Year Old Live-in Maid Is Pregnant For A 20 Year Old Boy by Annahh(f): 6:35pm On Oct 29, 2022 |
pocohantas:
Let nobody’s child live with me. A lot of times it starts as a maid. Most Nigerians actually go out to seek these kids from poor homes. It is the reason it is common among lower middle class homes. They don’t take these kids when they are single, it is until they are married with need for a nanny for house chores and babysitting that they automatically remember this arrangement. The rich do not have people’s kids living with them because they can afford cooks and drivers. If they are so nice, they embark on direct philanthropy and sponsorship of educations.
It would never be right to me… I know a couple of ladies that if not for the fact that their parents sent them to live with someone , they wouldn't have even seen the four walls of teritiary institution, for example my aunt husband is rich and they had a young boy that stayed with them from a young age till he finished nysc, they trained him in primary, secondary and university, even sponsored his wedding, gave him a job cause he is very loyal. My employer has a girl that they trained from jss till she entered teritary institution, one of my employer's friend got married to her. It helps sometimes. I don't mind someone staying with me when I get married, I lived with my rich aunt when I was younger and things were tough for my family then, they trained me in secondary school till I later left their house when things got better for my family. 3 Likes |
Re: My 16 Year Old Live-in Maid Is Pregnant For A 20 Year Old Boy by Richy4(m): 6:36pm On Oct 29, 2022 |
nedekid:
My bro it is wrong, we know. But ultimately one is helping the person. Could it be considered different from condoms etc? After all there is no age limit to which a person can buy condoms abroad. Even in western countries, a doctor or nurse will administer contraceptives to even a 13 year old with strict guidelines not to inform the parents. Anyway I concur with you it seems to be unethical. (alcohol tins). My brother, I understand that a caregiver might might take some necessary decision to help a teenager in his/ her care but not stuffs like that without her real parents consent....It might be seen as illegal..
The teenager might not even want to do it if the side effects were explained to her.. just like any other drugs, it has side effect including depression and weight gain .. how many teenagers in this 21st century will really like to be identified as fat?..
1 Like |
Re: My 16 Year Old Live-in Maid Is Pregnant For A 20 Year Old Boy by Topsin4great(m): 6:38pm On Oct 29, 2022 |
Away goal
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Re: My 16 Year Old Live-in Maid Is Pregnant For A 20 Year Old Boy by pocohantas(f): 6:39pm On Oct 29, 2022 |
Annahh: I know a couple of ladies that if not for the fact that their parents sent them to live with someone , they wouldn't have even seen the four walls of teritiary institution, for example my aunt husband is rich and they had a young boy that stayed with them from a young age till he finished nysc, they trained him in primary, secondary and university, even sponsored his wedding, gave him a job cause he is very loyal. My employer has a girl that they trained from jss till she entered teritary institution, one of my employer's friend got married to her. It helps sometimes. I don't mind someone staying with me when I get married, I lived with someone when I was younger and things were tough for my family then, they trained me in secondary school till I later left their house when things got better for my family. You don’t need to live with me for me to train you. I have a dependent and she doesn’t need to do nanny duties for her to be trained. Once you have to work for me to have your fees paid, then it becomes transactional and I, Pocohantas, would NEVER indulge in such. Even if you have to live with me, then you will be just another child in the house. There would be an employed ADULT maid. 6 Likes 3 Shares |
Re: My 16 Year Old Live-in Maid Is Pregnant For A 20 Year Old Boy by VirileNelly2420: 6:42pm On Oct 29, 2022 |
Richy4: OP, Please ignore anyone that wants to blame you or your family on this thread... U did your best...
Just go ahead with your plans of tracking the boy down... Inform his parents that their son got responsibilities now...
What I have to tell u is that despite her pregnancy/ mistakes, some girls still gets their act right in terms of future endeavours... If she wants to go back to school 2 or 3yrs after child delivery, it's still possible... Pregnancy is not a death sentence... She's just a teenager and they make mistakes..
N.B Thank God it wasn't you buddy...I guess you are too honourable to do that.... But my mind was skipping on your behalf.. imagining the scenario and what would be going through your wife's mind as she was trying to extract the information from her....
Lol... Sorry I laughed, this should be a serious matter. But I was also afraid for d man. Such has happened to someone I know. D wife took dis young naive gal from village to Lagos. She was probably in JSS1 or 2... The way dis gal was transformed to pretty damsel surprised every one. She stayed till she was done with SSCE, den issues erupted. Oga of d house started making advances. He would leave for market, den comes back wen d wife leaves. But in her own case, d little gal pushed to leave. Madam was lamenting, dat d gal wants to leave wen she needed her most after everything she has done for her. After taking her back to d village, the gal told her why she left. (Madam had to recall one or two episodes dat justifies wot d gal alleged). Madam got d msg, understood it as a blessing in disguise. Today, everyone is happy. 2 Likes |
Re: My 16 Year Old Live-in Maid Is Pregnant For A 20 Year Old Boy by prophetfire: 6:44pm On Oct 29, 2022 |
DSS1335: I am writing this with a sorrowful heart! This is quite a lengthy piece!!
In 2018, My wife brought a live-in maid toward the end of her gestational period as we eagerly anticipate the birth of our first fruit after 8 years of marriage.
We took the young girl as part of our family, she was just 13 years old in JSS2 at the time she joined us. She does minor household chores, like washing the dishes, keeping the house in and out clean, that's all. I made sure her education was not interrupted, she continued her schooling from Js3 till she completed her SSCE this year. Outsiders thought she was my first child considering the way she was being taken good care of.
At 16 years age, the evidence of proper nutrition was so glaring in her physique, the young girl of yesterday was already a beautiful damsel. I protected her from ravenous men old enough to be her father. Even from her classmates. Perhaps the mistake i made was in buying her phone before WAEC exam started. Well, the need for constant communication can not be overemphasized because i and my wife go out for work in the morning. My wife comes back in the day while i return back in the evening. Living her our 2 kids in her care: My first Child is 3 years plus in Nursery, the second is about 2 years in Prenursery.
When her mother made a stop by to visit her daughter 5 months ago after 4 years, she was so full of praise and thanking us for taking good care of her daughter, and begged us to allow her stay longer with us rather than her returning back to the village after completing her WAEC. I and my wife plan that i will take up the responsibility to train her up in University so she can be light to her family. Her elder siblings didn't complete their secondary school!
Today, all those dreams and aspirations have been shattered! The innocent girl child i took as a daughter is 5 months pregnant without even knowing she was pregnant! How possible? I could have swear with my life that she was still a virgin and innocent. Damm it! Where do I start from eh??
Well, my wife was rattled up by a what she called a terrible nightmare, she dreamt that she saw her girl carrying a new born baby. That was around 3 A.M she woke her up from sleep and asked her if she was pregnant, the girl denied it ignorantly. My wife had no reason to suspect her as she always buy her pads for her monthly menses except for this month. Then examined her and her suspicion became heightened as she saw a remarkable changes, her bra can't fit any longer, her bellybutton was out with black line running down! She ordered her to pee and run her test kit, it came back positive! My wife broke down in tears.
That morning, we didn't go to work for the day. we grilled her with questions. She confessed to us that she had intercourse only once in the month MAY yet she was still seeing her monthly menses. That she had a boy friend whom they secretly communicate on phone every day. That she lost her virginity to the boy. And they did it only ones in less than 30 minutes as she came back to check the kids who were still sleeping in the afternoon.
The boy came to visit her grand mother who return from the USA, she refused traveling to the East due to insecurities and rented a flat opposite my compound for just 3 months from March to June. During her stay, all her children and grandchildren came to visit her. It was one of her grand son that lured my maid and took advantage of her innocences.
We contacted the boy on phone and told him what happened, he denied it that it is impossible for him to be held responsible that he had sex with her only once and that's not enough to get a girl pregnant! I swear,i could have dealt with him fatally if he were within my reach. Well, i was able to comport myself and explain to him in details after which he kept quiet. He is just 20 years old awaiting admission. We have informed the girl's mother too who became shock and cold! And asked her daughter to return back to the village!
Considering this scenario, i came up with the plan to make that boy and family take up the responsibility of the pregnancy, she can't remain with my family anymore so as not draw unnecessary attention. I will track down the boy and his family and file a statutory rape charge against them if all avenue to resolve this case peacefully fail. From Pregnancy to child care is no joke. My people that is no joke at all. I feel very bad and compassionate for the innocent young girl who will be forced to sacrifice her future to be in the family way.
Any honest advise on how best to tackle this issue at hand would be appreciated . It's very pathetic. I support your move. If the boy's people would take responsibility, good and fine. If not track the idiot down and file statutory rape charges. However, more important, don't abandon that girl. Still help her to get something doing. Even if it's learn a skill and do something. And let her get close to God and start early to pick the pieces of her life together. It's so sad. |
Re: My 16 Year Old Live-in Maid Is Pregnant For A 20 Year Old Boy by Annahh(f): 6:45pm On Oct 29, 2022 |
pocohantas:
You don’t need to live with me for me to train you. I have a dependent and she doesn’t need to do nanny duties for her to be trained. Once you have to work for me to have your fees paid, then it becomes transactional and I, Pocohantas, would NEVER indulge in such. Are you aware that some parents beg the family to take their kids? about the young boy that stayed with my aunt, his mum came one day to my aunt's house in the village and dumped the boy there and told him bye bye. ![grin](https://www.nairaland.com/faces/grin.png) , my aunt was like "what will I do with this little boy", but she still took him. Same way my parent told my aunt that they want me to stay with her when things were so tough for us, I am not yet married but I have a cousin that her mum is already telling me when I marry I will take her with me, though I refused cause I don't want any family issues, if I want to take someone, it will be a nanny that I will pay monthly. 1 Like |
Re: My 16 Year Old Live-in Maid Is Pregnant For A 20 Year Old Boy by donMIG(m): 6:54pm On Oct 29, 2022 |
The way this kids dei grown now ehn...I saw one on fb looking fine as f Thank God she was honest she told me she's not yet in school I just kuku delete God abeg oo 1 Like |
Re: My 16 Year Old Live-in Maid Is Pregnant For A 20 Year Old Boy by Tfx1: 7:00pm On Oct 29, 2022 |
How |
Re: My 16 Year Old Live-in Maid Is Pregnant For A 20 Year Old Boy by ecolime(m): 7:09pm On Oct 29, 2022 |
BlackAIIDay:
Can I apply to be your maid boss, I swear I won't misbehave We have one already. Sorry bro. |
Re: My 16 Year Old Live-in Maid Is Pregnant For A 20 Year Old Boy by BlackAIIDay: 7:13pm On Oct 29, 2022 |
ecolime:
We have one already. Sorry bro. You don't need online maid ![cheesy](https://www.nairaland.com/faces/cheesy.png) |
Re: My 16 Year Old Live-in Maid Is Pregnant For A 20 Year Old Boy by Goodman247: 7:17pm On Oct 29, 2022 |
Two of them should marry, d earlier the better |
Re: My 16 Year Old Live-in Maid Is Pregnant For A 20 Year Old Boy by Backlaw406(m): 7:20pm On Oct 29, 2022 |
sweetman2022: If the family of the boy will not take care of the baby. You can go ahead and report it as a statutory rape against the boy or you focus on helping the girl and her mother taking care of the baby coming on its way. You have tried for what you have done for the family. The only minus I can detect from your side is you guys failed to give the girl a good sex education in which every teenager needs. That is the stage of their life where their ignorance is at peak and can mar them for life. You guys probably assume her to be innocent and leave her just like that. Well this is an example to follow a better path towards your own children about giving them early sex education, so they will be better prepare for the wolves out there. You have said it all. They failed to give the girl early sex education. They were deceived by her teenage and innocent looks. Every parent must ready to give their girl child as early they start to develop puberty part. Nowadays is a modern era where as much as teenage a child could be, has highly exposed beyond imagination, especially those that we're carelessly left with smartphone. At puberty stage, a girl child really need to be educated about sex because at that time, they develop sexual urge, especially when she is being deceived by one handsome dude. That time, there is this natural urge in them that make them think they are ready to date and be with opposite sex. |
Re: My 16 Year Old Live-in Maid Is Pregnant For A 20 Year Old Boy by weslay: 7:30pm On Oct 29, 2022 |
The wife self. Just image what she discovered from her dream. |
Re: My 16 Year Old Live-in Maid Is Pregnant For A 20 Year Old Boy by Freethinker87: 7:52pm On Oct 29, 2022 |
I can feel your pain man. Someone will be working to improve a situation, one non-entity will just come from nowhere and spoil what someone have been working on for years. It hurt's man.
Why don't you file a case of statutory rape right now before you track this family. Then withdraw the case if they agree to settle peacefully. 1 Like |
Re: My 16 Year Old Live-in Maid Is Pregnant For A 20 Year Old Boy by mimicherry: 7:54pm On Oct 29, 2022 |
DSS1335:
Thank you for your honest advise.
We have been able to trace through the help of the estate caretaker and contacted her aunty who was their grandmother's point of contact in PH through out their 3 months stay. She has accepted to help us mediate in the case, she will inform her Mother (the boy's grandma) and her sister(the boy's mother) about all that transpired. That the boy lives with his parents in Obigbo before ABA. If all efforts to resolve this case peacefully fails, i will file for statutory rape charge.
This doesn't make any sense! What will she gain for withholding such a very sensitive information from us?
When she was in SS1, i was forced to change her school after 3rd term, she confided in my wife that one of her male teacher was giving her undue attention to the point of inviting her to his house coupled with the fact that senior boys in her school were also disturbing her.
This girl doesn't lack anything, whatever she needs or payment that comes, we clear it. We live comfortably in my 3 bedroom flat. She has her own room, i don't allow her to watch any kind of indecent movie or music by ensuring that such channels are under lock filtering out only cartoon, starlife, zeeworld, and other children friendly channels. my wife has her room but we sleep together with our 2 kids.
Sometimes in June, my wife went through her phone call history, she receives call only from the guy constantly and other female friends whom we assumed were her classmates. we inquired what association she has with this boy that calls her all time even at odd hours of the night. we knew something wasnt ok as WhatsApp chat and sms were deleted. She wasn't allowed to use Facebook as we tried our best to keep her under close watch. On weekends, in our presence, she isn't allowed to use phone as my wife always hold it. What else could we have done. Our best wasn't enough i guess! And yes, my wife taught her sex education, i guess she was just too stupid, gullible, naive to fall for whatever the boy said. This a big lesson to all parents. We have learnt ours in a very hard way you and your wife are really good people I have to give it to you guys You are wonderful people 1 Like |
Re: My 16 Year Old Live-in Maid Is Pregnant For A 20 Year Old Boy by aboyj(m): 8:09pm On Oct 29, 2022 |
Pregnancy is not a disease.. after delivery she can still continue her education.. 1 Like |
Re: My 16 Year Old Live-in Maid Is Pregnant For A 20 Year Old Boy by harmony75: 8:14pm On Oct 29, 2022 |
God bless you and your wife you guys are great �� please you guys can follow up on her, so she can go back to school after delivery her baby even if she's not living with you again � she will never forget you guys. 2 Likes |
Re: My 16 Year Old Live-in Maid Is Pregnant For A 20 Year Old Boy by adontcare(f): 8:30pm On Oct 29, 2022 |
DSS1335:
Thank you for your honest advise.
We have been able to trace through the help of the estate caretaker and contacted her aunty who was their grandmother's point of contact in PH through out their 3 months stay. She has accepted to help us mediate in the case, she will inform her Mother (the boy's grandma) and her sister(the boy's mother) about all that transpired. That the boy lives with his parents in Obigbo before ABA. If all efforts to resolve this case peacefully fails, i will file for statutory rape charge.
This doesn't make any sense! What will she gain for withholding such a very sensitive information from us?
When she was in SS1, i was forced to change her school after 3rd term, she confided in my wife that one of her male teacher was giving her undue attention to the point of inviting her to his house coupled with the fact that senior boys in her school were also disturbing her.
This girl doesn't lack anything, whatever she needs or payment that comes, we clear it. We live comfortably in my 3 bedroom flat. She has her own room, i don't allow her to watch any kind of indecent movie or music by ensuring that such channels are under lock filtering out only cartoon, starlife, zeeworld, and other children friendly channels. my wife has her room but we sleep together with our 2 kids.
Sometimes in June, my wife went through her phone call history, she receives call only from the guy constantly and other female friends whom we assumed were her classmates. we inquired what association she has with this boy that calls her all time even at odd hours of the night. we knew something wasnt ok as WhatsApp chat and sms were deleted. She wasn't allowed to use Facebook as we tried our best to keep her under close watch. On weekends, in our presence, she isn't allowed to use phone as my wife always hold it. What else could we have done. Our best wasn't enough i guess! And yes, my wife taught her sex education, i guess she was just too stupid, gullible, naive to fall for whatever the boy said. This a big lesson to all parents. We have learnt ours in a very hard way see that zee world alone make girls act foolishly. Eg my sis inlaw watches zee world from morning till midnight. After we secured admission for her, paid the fees, this girl get mind run away with our gateman that we sacked. She went to stay with the guy in abia State. After eight days, she reappear in d village with many fabricated lies. Right now, she is heavily pregnant for all these small boys that sag their trousers and be smoking igbo 2 Likes |
Re: My 16 Year Old Live-in Maid Is Pregnant For A 20 Year Old Boy by obua: 8:43pm On Oct 29, 2022 |
Beey: You taking the girl in and supporting her education is commendable. It sounds like she was a bit idle and that’s how she found time to meet with the young man. I want to believe that she’s not as naive as people may want to make it sound. At that age, she must have had some biology lessons. It was probably curiosity and the excitement of being told that she’s loved, that pushed her into that situation. Now with that said, my advise is for you to reconsider your decision. People fall down and then get back up again. Pregnancy though highly discouraged at her age, is not the cause for her to receive a lifetime of condemnation. Have her go to the village and have the baby. Let her stay till the baby is weaned. Am sure she’ll face difficulties that will force her to mature and focus. After that, she can leave the baby with her mother and go back to school. Please save her from becoming another addition to statistics of poverty and lack of education. Please continue to sponsor her studies as you had planned. Take her as if she were your own daughter who made a mistake and give her a 2nd chance. In the future, go for domestic help who are over 18 years old and can handle the consequences of their actions. best advice so far. You can still continue supporting the young girl to lessen the burden of early pregnancy and also to further her education just like you planned |
Re: My 16 Year Old Live-in Maid Is Pregnant For A 20 Year Old Boy by jmichael259(m): 8:45pm On Oct 29, 2022 |
DSS1335:
A minor according to our constitution is any child below the age of 18.. Sleeping with such a child despite her consent is called statutory rape.. He risks 14 years imprisonment.. That young girl must not suffer alone. So i don't care whatever method i deploy to ensure that they take responsibilities Ignore naysayers. Your family have no blame in terms of phone, supervision or not noticing the 5mths pregnancy. It's a busy world, she still collects pads and didn't report missing her period added that their wasn't history nor indidcation of promiscuity. Only idle gossips will blame you guys. As for the matter, you have to embrace love. Whether or not you hook the boy, won't make things any easier for the girl or ur own heartbreak. Time heals everything. If she's still submissive, don't let her miss any plans for her future except 1 or 2yr break nw 4 financial reasons. Pls, give her @least OND even wtout jamb, evening/wkend prog & She'd start hustlin 4support 1 Like |
Re: My 16 Year Old Live-in Maid Is Pregnant For A 20 Year Old Boy by rickleye: 8:55pm On Oct 29, 2022 |
DSS1335: I am writing this with a sorrowful heart! This is quite a lengthy piece!!
In 2018, My wife brought a live-in maid toward the end of her gestational period as we eagerly anticipate the birth of our first fruit after 8 years of marriage.
We took the young girl as part of our family, she was just 13 years old in JSS2 at the time she joined us. She does minor household chores, like washing the dishes, keeping the house in and out clean, that's all. I made sure her education was not interrupted, she continued her schooling from Js3 till she completed her SSCE this year. Outsiders thought she was my first child considering the way she was being taken good care of.
At 16 years age, the evidence of proper nutrition was so glaring in her physique, the young girl of yesterday was already a beautiful damsel. I protected her from ravenous men old enough to be her father. Even from her classmates. Perhaps the mistake i made was in buying her phone before WAEC exam started. Well, the need for constant communication can not be overemphasized because i and my wife go out for work in the morning. My wife comes back in the day while i return back in the evening. Living her our 2 kids in her care: My first Child is 3 years plus in Nursery, the second is about 2 years in Prenursery.
When her mother made a stop by to visit her daughter 5 months ago after 4 years, she was so full of praise and thanking us for taking good care of her daughter, and begged us to allow her stay longer with us rather than her returning back to the village after completing her WAEC. I and my wife plan that i will take up the responsibility to train her up in University so she can be light to her family. Her elder siblings didn't complete their secondary school!
Today, all those dreams and aspirations have been shattered! The innocent girl child i took as a daughter is 5 months pregnant without even knowing she was pregnant! How possible? I could have swear with my life that she was still a virgin and innocent. Damm it! Where do I start from eh??
Well, my wife was rattled up by a what she called a terrible nightmare, she dreamt that she saw her girl carrying a new born baby. That was around 3 A.M she woke her up from sleep and asked her if she was pregnant, the girl denied it ignorantly. My wife had no reason to suspect her as she always buy her pads for her monthly menses except for this month. Then examined her and her suspicion became heightened as she saw a remarkable changes, her bra can't fit any longer, her bellybutton was out with black line running down! She ordered her to pee and run her test kit, it came back positive! My wife broke down in tears.
That morning, we didn't go to work for the day. we grilled her with questions. She confessed to us that she had intercourse only once in the month MAY yet she was still seeing her monthly menses. That she had a boy friend whom they secretly communicate on phone every day. That she lost her virginity to the boy. And they did it only ones in less than 30 minutes as she came back to check the kids who were still sleeping in the afternoon.
The boy came to visit her grand mother who return from the USA, she refused traveling to the East due to insecurities and rented a flat opposite my compound for just 3 months from March to June. During her stay, all her children and grandchildren came to visit her. It was one of her grand son that lured my maid and took advantage of her innocences.
We contacted the boy on phone and told him what happened, he denied it that it is impossible for him to be held responsible that he had sex with her only once and that's not enough to get a girl pregnant! I swear,i could have dealt with him fatally if he were within my reach. Well, i was able to comport myself and explain to him in details after which he kept quiet. He is just 20 years old awaiting admission. We have informed the girl's mother too who became shock and cold! And asked her daughter to return back to the village!
Considering this scenario, i came up with the plan to make that boy and family take up the responsibility of the pregnancy, she can't remain with my family anymore so as not draw unnecessary attention. I will track down the boy and his family and file a statutory rape charge against them if all avenue to resolve this case peacefully fail. From Pregnancy to child care is no joke. My people that is no joke at all. I feel very bad and compassionate for the innocent young girl who will be forced to sacrifice her future to be in the family way.
Any honest advise on how best to tackle this issue at hand would be appreciated Dude this is easy now. 1. Adopt the child as one of your own. ( you guys already have 2 find another girl to be a maid live in ( God has blessed you ) 2. When the child is born do a DNA test . If the grandma of the boy wants to take responsibility then you discuss terms of parenting. If the boy is not the father then take the you become the parent till the maid is finish school and is working . 3. Hopefully both the young lady and boy WILL PRACTICE SAFE SEX in their respective lives in future !!!!!!!!!!!!. |