deols: I mentioned exposure as a reason that I think my parents would act the way I think.

I understand that some people can act differently even when being exposed. But then, the question has to be, exposed to what?


Tribal lineage shouldnt be having this much effect on us. But then, it is a big issue in Nigeria.

If we have become a nation speaking the same language and with a cultural integration, this would nit have been a problem at least in a Nigerian context.

Even when they speak the same language, the dialect or where the person comes from will become an issue. It is far more irritating for me when muslims do it because we should not be doing things from Jahiliyyah...

tbaba1234:

Even when they speak the same language, the dialect or where the person comes from will become an issue. It is far more irritating for me when muslims do it because we should not be doing things from Jahiliyyah...

I agree.

In some places, when his first wife is from elsewhere, the family would find for him 'their own' wife.

Ever since I became conscious of dating,I have never dated a muslim sister before. Why? The reason is not far fetched,muslim sisters are always seem too reserved for me. They are not easy to woo. I had had hard times dating them. I know deep inside me that I can never marry a christian. Please,any available sister should feel free to contact me on my bb pin(2387F6A3) or reach me on ma mobile on 07085123439. Ma salam!

kill-lie:
Ever since I became conscious of dating,I have never dated a muslim sister before. Why? The reason is not far fetched,muslim sisters are always seem too reserved for me. They are not easy to woo. I had had hard times dating them. I know deep inside me that I can never marry a christian. Please,any available sister should feel free to contact me on my bb pin(2387F6A3) or reach me on ma mobile on 07085123439. Ma salam!

What an intro. A sister is going to see this and just like that be interested? I think not.

But who knows?

^^^ hahahahahahahahahaha......dats wot has bcom of life wit internet

kill-lie:
Ever since I became conscious of dating,I have never dated a muslim sister before. Why? The reason is not far fetched,muslim sisters are always seem too reserved for me. They are not easy to woo. I had had hard times dating them. I know deep inside me that I can never marry a christian. Please,any available sister should feel free to contact me on my bb pin(2387F6A3) or reach me on ma mobile on 07085123439. Ma salam!

Alhamdulilah for my sisters....

I. Dating is haram.

Ii. Good thing, you are not willing to marry a non muslim.

Iii. I am sure if you expressed an intention to marry not date. A sister might take you more seriously.

Though i came in late, but i must still acknowledge the fact that tbaba stole my though on that...

“Testing the waters“ is an unislamic idea, so it should be debunked...

One can't be wallowing in sins and except an increase in mercies, though one might experience more blessings on earth(if Allah wants) but its for a short while(earth)....

Its a different thing if one is not informed bout an issue, but issue haven't been cleared, then a muslim should opt for the best

We have to be careful of these-

“A man will follow the way of his close friend, so let oneof you look at who he takes as a close friend." (Abu Dawud)

Culture came from People. Religion came from Allah. Soremember when you choose culture over Religion, you're choosing people over Allah.

^^
I dont think anyone is going to choose culture over religion.

Choosing culture over religion means that you would marry people from your culture irrespective of their religion and that definitely is not the issue here.

2.If a Muslim gets married without all the requirements intact, would the marriage be regarded as legal according to Islam?

I mean, if for example the marriage is in a court and there is no wali involved.

2. Does a woman who is previously married need a wali for her second marriage? Aee all the requirements same in both instances?

deols: ^^
I dont think anyone is going to choose culture over religion.

Choosing culture over religion means that you would marry people from your culture irrespective of their religion and that definitely is not the issue here.

Ma'am! It means more than that.

Dating,parenting,marriage,death rites(procedures),finance,food consumption, etc etc.... Have their islamic guidance/laws and also some cultures have their ways of handling such cases, so if a muslim opt for other law aside from the islamic on issue, then such person has choose culture over deen.

Note- Don't get me wrong, am not talking bout secular state or not.

Tribes,customs and tradition has always been my fear for considering a mate around here(though i usually pray bout it) when the time comes....

Around here, alot still mix culture wit religion, which is two different issue... And that led me to considering people outta here(europe and asia). For normally i expect religion to supercedes the culture but the case has been relatively scarce around here.
Though in recent times there has been a partial change on that thought but have hardly seen or heard of such scarce case.
Example of some of those acts- aso-ebi, modern wedding,incisions,some traditional medications, some odd beliefs etc.. To me, they're off tracks

I once shared this opinion wit someone and the person said “i doubt it if you ll get married“

What do you mean by here

And what is traditional medication or incision.


Finally, I dont think aso ebi is haram.

deols: 2.If a Muslim gets married without all the requirements intact, would the marriage be regarded as legal according to Islam?

I mean, if for example the marriage is in a court and there is no wali involved.

2. Does a woman who is previously married need a wali for her second marriage? Aee all the requirements same in both instances?

If the woman doesn't have her wali and the required witness isn't present and dowry isn't paid the wedding is not valid.

2. The woman still needs a wali. Yes.
The difference is in the acceptance of a groom.

deols: 2.If a Muslim gets married without all the requirements intact, would the marriage be regarded as legal according to Islam?

I mean, if for example the marriage is in a court and there is no wali involved.

2. Does a woman who is previously married need a wali for her second marriage? Aee all the requirements same in both instances?

If the woman doesn't have her wali and the required witness isn't present and dowry isn't paid the wedding is not valid.

2. The woman still needs a wali. Yes.
The difference is in the acceptance of a groom not the marriage requirements.

@showietee culture doesn't always go against religion.
What incisions, what do you mean by modern wedding?
Asians and Europeans don't they have their culture?

And how's aso ebi off track.

*clears throat*

As salaam,
Vacancy vacancy vacancy
Position: second wife
DICIPLINE: aabidaat, qaanitaat, saa'ihaat, thayyibaat and abkaar
Not less than 23 years old
Renumeration::::::...........

Gosh! My wife just saw me typing this.

UPDATE: VACANCY WITHDRAWN

Mai-suya:
*clears throat*

As salaam,
Vacancy vacancy vacancy
Position: second wife
DICIPLINE: aabidaat, qaanitaat, saa'ihaat, thayyibaat and abkaar
Not less than 23 years old
Renumeration::::::...........

Gosh! My wife just saw me typing this.

UPDATE: VACANCY WITHDRAWN

Very funny.

Sissie:

If the woman doesn't have her wali and the required witness isn't present and dowry isn't paid the wedding is not valid.

2. The woman still needs a wali. Yes.
The difference is in the acceptance of a groom not the marriage requirements.

How is d acceptance of a groom different?

For question 1, if they did d wrong thing out of ignorance of defiance. Would you call their relationship that of zinna? Are their children seen as born out of wedlock?

deols:

How is d acceptance of a groom different?

For question 1, if they did d wrong thing out of ignorance of defiance. Would you call their relationship that of zinna? Are their children seen as born out of wedlock?

If a virgin is asked by her wali and she keeps quiet her quietness is seen as her accepting to marry the man. But a divorcee has to verbally consent to it.

I don't understand your question 1. Can you explain better please.

If the marriage is invalid, does it mean everythn btwn d couple is invalid?

Are they having zinna(fornication)when they have sex?

deols: What do you mean by here

And what is traditional medication or incision.


Finally, I dont think aso ebi is haram.

Here- west africa.

Traditional medication- example is mixture of alcoho wit some other things for medication and relating matters.

Incision is called “gbere“ is sw nigeria... Having some marks on the body wit some odd beliefs about it.

Aso-ebi to me is totally off track... The best outfit for sisters should be your niqab.

[quote author=Sissie]@showietee culture doesn't always go against religion.

Easier said than done!


What incisions, what do you mean by modern wedding?

Elaborate noise pollution we see/hear today in our society accompanied wit wastefulness
Asians and Europeans don't they have their culture?

They do have, but some has let religion take over tradition/culture and that's what am talking about.

And how's aso ebi off track.

Mummy wa.... Its totally off track to me.


I already said some said i might not get married wit my thought.

showietee:

Here- west africa.

Traditional medication- example is mixture of alcoho wit some other things for medication and relating matters.

Incision is called “gbere“ is sw nigeria... Having some marks on the body wit some odd beliefs about it.

Aso-ebi to me is totally off track... The best outfit for sisters should be your niqab.

Differentiate your opinion from what Islam says. Even sisters can wear aso ebi if they want to and still wear their niqab. Abi are clothes not supposed to be worn below the khimar?

No one forces anyone to have gbere or drink agbo..

stop making an issue from something so not tangible.

deols: If the marriage is invalid, does it mean everythn btwn d couple is invalid?

Are they having zinna(fornication)when they have sex?

Hmmm
1. Did they do it out of ignorance or knew and went ahead.

This is my opinion, since the marriage itself is not valid, it means they are technically not married, and based on that I say the sexual intercourse is illegal. If we say it's not zina it means we agree the marriage is legal and it's somewhat ok to do it because the procedure is allowed.

And many people do this. Infact there are people who divorce their wives more than 3 times and still reconcile
without her marrying someone else.
If I know someone who did that I would ask them to re-do the marriage rites just to be safe.

[quote author=showietee][/quote]
How's noise pollution and wastefulness just a modern wedding thing, are you saying it never happened in the olden days.

Please don't call me mummy.

And aso ebi is no big deal.
Besides like deols said all this is not tangible.
This are part of culture not everyone does or accept.

deols:

Differentiate your opinion from what Islam says. Even sisters can wear aso ebi if they want to and still wear their niqab. Abi are clothes not supposed to be worn below the khimar?

No one forces anyone to have gbere or drink agbo..

stop making an issue from something so not tangible.

Heard you ma.

Neva talked bout force, but i said you can hardly see situation whereby the two issue is distinct. Rather it is infused.

"Make Marriage easy and Zina Difficult"
Today we are living in society where marriage has became difficult and it is getting more and more difficult. Becuase of this new generation is falling into other side and that is "Zina".
"O ye who believe! Save yourselves and your families from a Fire whose fuel is Men and Stones, over which are (appointed) angels stern (and) severe, who flinch not (from executing) the Commands they receive fromGod, but do (precisely) what they are commanded. [Holy Quran: Tahrim 66: 6]
•Keep marriage as simple as possible and less expensive

Religion teaches absolute moral and modesty, culture brings about wastefulness.

Sissie:
Hmmm
1. Did they do it out of ignorance or knew and went ahead.

This is my opinion, since the marriage itself is not valid, it means they are technically not married, and based on that I say the sexual intercourse is illegal. If we say it's not zina it means we agree the marriage is legal and it's somewhat ok to do it because the procedure is allowed.

And many people do this. Infact there are people who divorce their wives more than 3 times and still reconcile
without her marrying someone else.
If I know someone who did that I would ask them to re-do the marriage rites just to be safe.

I want to think dr is some leverage.

If a christian got married and later bcoms a Muslim. He wont have to make the marriage Islamic.

There should be a way out for the erring Muslim if they ask for forgiveness later on. We wouldnt want to see their children as bastads(i couldnt find a less offensive word)

Salam, talkin about mixing culture with religion, ow about cases where the groom and friends are required to prostrate before the bride parents. Wat can d groom do in such a situation?

kayword: Salam, talkin about mixing culture with religion, ow about cases where the groom and friends are required to prostrate before the bride parents. Wat can d groom do in such a situation?

Very funny...You mean you won't prostrate to your in laws when seeking the hand of their daughter in marriage if it is required by the culture?

Hmmm....you are taking it way too far..


Pray tell me what else would you do? Walk away when asked to do so or plainly refuse...Everything is judged by your intentions bro.

deols:

I want to think dr is some leverage.

If a christian got married and later bcoms a Muslim. He wont have to make the marriage Islamic.

There should be a way out for the erring Muslim if they ask for forgiveness later on. We wouldnt want to see their children as bastads(i couldnt find a less offensive word)

There might be but I don't know of any.
Will find out and tell you if no one else answers the question on the thread.

onegig:


Very funny...You mean you won't prostrate to your in laws when seeking the hand of their daughter in marriage if it is required by the culture?

Hmmm....you are taking it way too far..


Pray tell me what else would you do? Walk away when asked to do so or plainly refuse...Everything is judged by your intentions bro.

Prostrating is adjudged by some scholars as a form of worship, dat means u may actually be paying obeisance to ur in-laws without knowing, something meant for God alone. That could be a sin u know