Neweramify:
Op your wife was wrong, but try and understand her fear. Most women feel inconvenient around their mother inlaw. Not because she hates her mother inlaw but for the fear of the unknown.

Let her know how you feel knowing she wanna bring her mum in when she rejected your mum. I'm sure she will feel remorse of her action.

Permit her to bring her mum, cause if anything happen to the old woman, she may accuse you of one thing or the other.

remorse my yansh. She ain't bringing nobody to that house. Do me I do you, the world no go end.

ozalogbo:
I am the first child of my mother, and I have two younger male siblings. I am doing well financially. My wife is the last of four children in her family. My dad died when I was still in the university, and this affected my mum.

However, as she aged, her health waned. She was a retired teacher. My brothers are not in the country. Both of them are in Europe. I wanted to have my mother stay with me in her later years because of her health and loneliness but my wife did not want it.

Whenever she was ill and I brought her home to be with us, my wife was usually hostile, especially if my mum had stayed beyond a week. She did not hid her disapproval, and this caused problems in the marriage. People advised that I should send my mum away and pay someone to live with her and take care of her. They said that marriage was between a man and his wife, not between a man, his wife, and his mother. I did and peace returned. Eventually my mum passed on after a few years.

Along the line, my father in law also died. And down the line, my mother in law's health began to deteriorate. We live in the same town. Among my wife's siblings she is the only one doing quite well. Now there are suggestions that the mother should come and live with us so that my wife can give her proper care. I believe that her living with us and seeing her grandchildren will help her. And indeed i have no problem accepting her, but when i remember the treatment my wife gave to my mum, there is a strong revulsion, in fact, anger in me. I shared with a friend, and he advised i forgive my wife, but the revulsion is so strong that i would feel cheated if i agreed.

What do you guys think. She reminded me then that marriage was between a man and his wife only. Shouldn't this also apply to my wife now?

U are too daft! Kai women has finished naija men, tell ur wife to go and send her mom to a care home and use her money to look after her mother, if u do otherwise thun*** fire ..., if she wants divorce for u not allowing her, let her go and bring d divorce papers so u can sign and immediately hire an experienced divorce attorney, what's good for the goose is good for the gander, this is worth losing ur marriage over, wat shes doing is worst than cheating and infidelity to me

What goes around comes around, don't let her mum into your house

Exodus15v11:
You were your mom's only child left in Nigeria, hence she should have stayed with you to take better care of her and show her love during her remaining years, but you sent her away because of your wife, knowing fully well that she was not only ill but she was lonely. You did not do right by the woman. I can only imagine how she must have felt.

Yes, the same rule should apply to your wife's mom. You two can find someone to go stay with her and look after the finances involved. Or one of her siblings can go stay with her. As her siblings are there in Nigeria, she has a lot more family support than you did, which makes it even more baffling that she wants to be a hyprocrite and have her mom stay with you when she denied your mom of this same treatment and was hostile towards her.

Exodus 15:11 you have given me a scripture to read this morning. Thanks

I hardly comment here, but I'll comment on this even if you might not see it. If you agree, the spirit of your mom will forever be unhappy with you.

May God punish U if U let that woman live with You

EriMma1:
I would have told you to do what is in your mind but then, it wasn't the mother who offended you but your wife. Besides you had the choice to let your mother stay with you but you succumbed to your wife and let her will prevail. So don't treat the old woman badly because of her daughters sins.

Forgive and let the old woman come. After all she would be the one to do all the care job, not you.

pls are you married? If you are you will understand the pressure of a woman. He did the right thing by getting someelse take good care of his mother.

He should also at most get someone to take care of his Mother in law that's the best he can do.

His mother in law can be coming from time to time

Debunk her request for her to think ur mother doesn't deserve ur home her mother shouldn't as well.

Some men are so weak that's why their wife take advantage of their weaknesses, imagine this OP asking us this kind of question after what the wife did to his mother

Not all things forgiveness can solve abeg a times people need to feel the same pain they dish out to others too so they will experience how it feels too...

If she allowed you give proper care to your Mum there is possibility your mum might still be alive today...

U send ur mumm that carried u in her womb away as results in respect of peace between u and ur wife, but now ur wife want her own mother to come and stay and enjoy her life under ur wealth. Even in the first place I blamed u in away that u obey an unfortunate idea/suggestions from unwise friend. If u allow ur wife to separate u from ur mother time Shall come she also separate u from ur children. My submission is that method applied to A should be applied to B.

Your wife got that evil character from her mum. If her mum moves in with you, ur life will be miserable trust me. Your children will pick up that evil character too. I don’t know why men allow this things to happen. No woman should come into a man’s life and separate him from his family.

ojun50:
Discuss with her and remind her how she treated yr mum, then tell her to give you time to think about it.

In the end still allow her mother to come and stay for peace and unity.

Every married man should understand that the wife is not your blood so expect anything expectable but is children is his blood.

Your wife is not your blood! I feel over and over again.

Samantha124:
How can you identify when a person is stupid and dumb?

Let's start from there.

Like when they don't understand everything I said.
Your type only good for pumping and dumping. Anything other than that the man is in danger.

I bet you won't still understand what I just said cos you dumb?

For you to think about allowing your mother in-law come to stay in the house after all your wife did to your mum show she silently rules the house. My wife cannot bully me into sending my old dad away..
That is the least I can do after he brought me up into whom I am today. She wouldn't dare cos I've made it clear to her on how that important that man is to my life

Nitoriolohun1:
WOMEN SHA !!!

Forgive but never forget, I expected your wife to be more civil and never let such discussion or arrangement get to you not to talk of the fact that you are considering it maybe you should or not.

In fact if you do God will punish you !!!

You allowed your mother died an untimely death courtesy your wife, YES !!! untimely death because loneliness kills faster than a bullet

I was discussing with a lady recently and she said she's praying her mother in-law is dead before getting to marry any man that will come for her and I said to her immediately you will never see your grandchildren too

Apostle was right, truly marriage comes with alot of problems.

OP, I repeat God will punish you if you allow your mother in-law in your house. Bunch of selfish souls

Shout out to all women that are still humane, God bless you all.

The guy really failed his mum. He's supposed to be asking for forgiving from the woman that loved him first and most, even if she's dead. It's a pain and an insult to that woman's memory if her own son is about to do for his mother-in-law what he couldn't do for her, his own mum at her most vulnerable moments. He was the only person that woman had - her husband late and the younger siblings in far away Europe, yet this guy left her out in the cold till she passed away. I pity him cos that thing he calls a wife will give him a lifetime of pain especially if he doesn't agree to her proposition of bringing her mum oven. She's only just starting with this OP.

24 pages of guys calling OP a weak man and insulting him simply because he asked for an advise if you ask the same guys to be a provider to show their own strength story go enter and wailing will start. Na for here they go get mouth and be doing chochocho calling simp simp simp up and down.

Neweramify:
Op your wife was wrong, but try and understand her fear. Most women feel inconvenient around their mother inlaw. Not because she hates her mother inlaw but for the fear of the unknown.

Let her know how you feel knowing she wanna bring her mum in when she rejected your mum. I'm sure she will feel remorse of her action.

Permit her to bring her mum, cause if anything happen to the old woman, [/b]she may accuse you of one thing or the other[b].

Women and manipulation

ozalogbo:
I am the first child of my mother, and I have two younger male siblings. I am doing well financially. My wife is the last of four children in her family. My dad died when I was still in the university, and this affected my mum.

However, as she aged, her health waned. She was a retired teacher. My brothers are not in the country. Both of them are in Europe. I wanted to have my mother stay with me in her later years because of her health and loneliness but my wife did not want it.

Whenever she was ill and I brought her home to be with us, my wife was usually hostile, especially if my mum had stayed beyond a week. She did not hid her disapproval, and this caused problems in the marriage. People advised that I should send my mum away and pay someone to live with her and take care of her. They said that marriage was between a man and his wife, not between a man, his wife, and his mother. I did and peace returned. Eventually my mum passed on after a few years.

Along the line, my father in law also died. And down the line, my mother in law's health began to deteriorate. We live in the same town. Among my wife's siblings she is the only one doing quite well. Now there are suggestions that the mother should come and live with us so that my wife can give her proper care. I believe that her living with us and seeing her grandchildren will help her. And indeed i have no problem accepting her, but when i remember the treatment my wife gave to my mum, there is a strong revulsion, in fact, anger in me. I shared with a friend, and he advised i forgive my wife, but the revulsion is so strong that i would feel cheated if i agreed.

What do you guys think. She reminded me then that marriage was between a man and his wife only. Shouldn't this also apply to my wife now?

don't accept her never

ozalogbo:
I am the first child of my mother, and I have two younger male siblings. I am doing well financially. My wife is the last of four children in her family. My dad died when I was still in the university, and this affected my mum.

However, as she aged, her health waned. She was a retired teacher. My brothers are not in the country. Both of them are in Europe. I wanted to have my mother stay with me in her later years because of her health and loneliness but my wife did not want it.

Whenever she was ill and I brought her home to be with us, my wife was usually hostile, especially if my mum had stayed beyond a week. She did not hid her disapproval, and this caused problems in the marriage. People advised that I should send my mum away and pay someone to live with her and take care of her. They said that marriage was between a man and his wife, not between a man, his wife, and his mother. I did and peace returned. Eventually my mum passed on after a few years.

Along the line, my father in law also died. And down the line, my mother in law's health began to deteriorate. We live in the same town. Among my wife's siblings she is the only one doing quite well. Now there are suggestions that the mother should come and live with us so that my wife can give her proper care. I believe that her living with us and seeing her grandchildren will help her. And indeed i have no problem accepting her, but when i remember the treatment my wife gave to my mum, there is a strong revulsion, in fact, anger in me. I shared with a friend, and he advised i forgive my wife, but the revulsion is so strong that i would feel cheated if i agreed.

What do you guys think. She reminded me then that marriage was between a man and his wife only. Shouldn't this also apply to my wife now?

what goes around , goes around. No ever allow that woman close to your house.. even the Bible said , do unto others, what they do unto you.

Who would be responsible for the bills?

EriMma1:
I would have told you to do what is in your mind but then, it wasn't the mother who offended you but your wife. Besides you had the choice to let your mother stay with you but you succumbed to your wife and let her will prevail. So don't treat the old woman badly because of her daughters sins.

Forgive and let the old woman come. After all she would be the one to do all the care job, not you.

What's good for the goose is good for the gander.

Hmm.

This case looks more complicated.

Op I will tell you the truth,you should have stood your ground by atlist employing the services of a help giver to your mum in your house since you said you are doing well financially. My reasons is the fact that you were the only child of your mum in the country at that point in time and don't forget you are the first child of your mum.

I have read a lot of response,and I don't blame most people for their outburst.

The truth is that there can be no true healing without justice and letting loose of our emotions. You seriously need to talk to your wife and most importantly seek the forgiveness of your mum.

Some people just support the actions of the wife without even asking if the said lady has learnt any lesson from all that has happened.

Lessons must be learnt, corrections made and respect's given to every party involved in marriage.

Will stop with the story of one of my uncle's who use to be rich.
As I type now his remains is in the mortuary,since his death his wife hasn't visited home,his brothers are the one's contributing, meeting people and making sure he gets a befitting burial.

We must learn that table's can turn very fast in life.

No way

What goes around comes around......serve her same food she serves you

Zupay:


He should the end marriage with the first then remarry though there is no guarantee the second one would treat him when he is frail in as much men tend to endure in their second marriage what they couldn't in their first

Divorce isn't a play thing, especially when there are kids involved - then their lives become unnecessarily complicated.

Your wife must be a very wicked person from her actions,most wives hate their mother inlaw hardly do i see a man possess this evil and wicked character

They don't want to see your fams,they hate for no reason, but want you to cherish theirs

That is a very selfish thing to do as a wife,

When dey see ya mother for d first time Dem go dey form gentle and good person oya na MARRY Dem and see dem.explore their wickedness

OP no gree don't let her mother into that house do same thing......well no woman fir try that shit with me if she no gree make she go her Papa house

Idiot

Neweramify:
Op your wife was wrong, but try and understand her fear. Most women feel inconvenient around their mother inlaw. Not because she hates her mother inlaw but for the fear of the unknown.

Let her know how you feel knowing she wanna bring her mum in when she rejected your mum. I'm sure she will feel remorse of her action.

Permit her to bring her mum, cause if anything happen to the old woman, she may accuse you of one thing or the other.

does this make sense to you ?

Elsueno:
it's good that I am not u, bros ozalogbo, because I would rather chase my wife away than push away my sick mom.... absolutely impossible.....And now after she done reject my own momcy she wants me to accept hers... omoh 🤣😂😂😂😂......It would NEVER HAPPEN!

guy u get sense

Dtruthspeaker:


Guy, don't think about it. Do not, I repeat do not let her in!

Although, you should have kicked her out when she did her shit but now, you are gonna have to kick her out if she does not buckle. The same thing she did to you must be done to her. Imagine, she could even ask.

Unforgiveness is written in your heart. Yet you preach a gospel.

ozalogbo:
I am the first child of my mother, and I have two younger male siblings. I am doing well financially. My wife is the last of four children in her family. My dad died when I was still in the university, and this affected my mum.

However, as she aged, her health waned. She was a retired teacher. My brothers are not in the country. Both of them are in Europe. I wanted to have my mother stay with me in her later years because of her health and loneliness but my wife did not want it.

Whenever she was ill and I brought her home to be with us, my wife was usually hostile, especially if my mum had stayed beyond a week. She did not hid her disapproval, and this caused problems in the marriage. People advised that I should send my mum away and pay someone to live with her and take care of her. They said that marriage was between a man and his wife, not between a man, his wife, and his mother. I did and peace returned. Eventually my mum passed on after a few years.

Along the line, my father in law also died. And down the line, my mother in law's health began to deteriorate. We live in the same town. Among my wife's siblings she is the only one doing quite well. Now there are suggestions that the mother should come and live with us so that my wife can give her proper care. I believe that her living with us and seeing her grandchildren will help her. And indeed i have no problem accepting her, but when i remember the treatment my wife gave to my mum, there is a strong revulsion, in fact, anger in me. I shared with a friend, and he advised i forgive my wife, but the revulsion is so strong that i would feel cheated if i agreed.

What do you guys think. She reminded me then that marriage was between a man and his wife only. Shouldn't this also apply to my wife now?

Yes remind her. She cannot have her own way now after denying you the same thing. She should also pay someone to take care of her mum somewhere else.

This is not about revenge but to establish principles.

Eserise1:
Please forgive your wife, don't pay evil with evil, God will surely bless you,
But what you will do , first call few of your wife's extended family tell them what happened, and you must demand appology from her to you and your family for her hostile way towards your mother

apology kwa..d beds been made so she should just lie on it