I stumbled into this letter so i decided to share it with y'all


LETTER TO NIGERIAN PARENTS

Friends,

Let me add the benefit of my time as a student and then resident in
the UK - and I live in Lagos now. The first thing that I discovered
about UK-born, white, English undergraduates was that all of them did
holiday or weekend job to support themselves - including the children
of millionaires amongst them. It is the norm over there - regardless
how wealthy their parents are. And I soon discovered that virtually
all other foreign students did the same - the exception being those of
us status-conscious Nigerians.

I also watched Richard Branson (owner of Virgin Airline) speaking on
the Biography Channel and, to my amazement; he said that his young
children travel in the economy class -even when the parents (he and
his wife) are in upper class. Richard Branson is a billionaire in
Pound Sterling. A quick survey would show you that only children from
Nigeria fly business or upper class to commence their studies in the
UK . No other foreign students do this. There is no aircraft attached
to the office of the prime minister in the UK - he travels on BA. And
the same goes for the Royals. The Queen does not have an aircraft for
her exclusive use.

These practices simply become the culture which the next generation
carries forward. Have you seen the car that Kate Middleton the lass
married to Prince William drives? VW Golf or something close to it.
But there's one core difference in them and us (generally speaking).
They - the billionaires among them work for their money, we steal
ours!

If we want our children to bring about the desired change we have been
praying for on behalf of our dear country, then please, please let's
begin now and teach them to work hard so that they can stand alone and
most importantly be content, and not have to "steal". This seems to be
the norm these days.

"30 is the new 18", which seems to be the new age for testing out the
world in Nigeria now. That seems to be an unspoken but widely accepted
mindset among the last 2 generations of parents in Nigeria .

At age 18 years, a typical young adult in the UK leaves the clutches
of his/her parents for the University, chances are, that's the last
time those parents will ever play "landlord" to their son or daughter
except of course the occasional home visits during the academic year.

At 21 years and above or below, the now fully grown and independent
minded adult graduates from University, searches for employment, gets
a job and shares a flat with other young people on a journey into
becoming fully fledged adults.

I can hear the echo of parents saying, well, that is because the UK
economy is thriving, safe, well structured and jobs are everywhere? I
beg to differ and I ask that you kindly hear me out. I am UK trained
Recruitment Consultant and I have been practicing for the past 10
years in Nigeria . I have a broad range of experience from recruiting
graduates to executive director level of large corporations. In
addition, I talk from the point of view of someone with relatively
privileged upbringing.

Driven to school every day, had my clothes washed for me, was barred
from taking any part-time job during my A-levels so that I could
concentrate on studying for my exams?! BUT, I got the opportunity to
live apart from my parents from age 18 and the only time I came back
home to stay was for 3 months before I got married!

Am I saying that every parent should wash their hands off their
children at age 18? No, not at all, of course, I enjoyed the savings
that I made from living on and off at my parent's house in London -
indeed that is the primary reason for my being able to buy myself a 3
bedroom flat in London at age 25 with absolutely no direct financial
help from my parents!

For me, pocket money stopped at age 22, not that it was ever enough
for my lifestyle to compete with Paris Hilton's or Victoria Beckham's.
Meanwhile today, we have Nigerian children who have never worked for 5
minutes in their lives insisting on flying "only" first or business
class, carrying the latest Louis Vuitton ensemble, Victoria 's Secret
underwear and wearing Jimmy Choo's, fully paid for by their "loving"
parents.

I often get calls from anxious parents, my son graduated 2 years ago
and is still looking for a job, can you please assist! Oh really! So
where exactly this "child" is my usual question. Why are you the one
making this call dad/mum?

I am yet to get a satisfactory answer, but between you and me, chances
are that big boy is cruising around Lagos with a babe dressed to the
nines, in his dad's spanking new SUV with enough "pocket money" to put
your salary to shame. It is not at all strange to have a 28 year old
who has NEVER worked for a day in his or her life in Nigeria but
"earns" a six figure "salary" from parents for doing absolutely
nothing.
I see them in my office once in a while, 26 years old with absolutely
no skills to sell, apart from a shiny CV, written by his dad's
secretary in the office. Of course, he has a driver at his beck and
call and he is driven to the job interview. We have a fairly decent
conversation and we get to the inevitable question - so, what salary
are you looking to earn? Answer comes straight out - N250,000.00. I
ask if that is per month or per annum.

Of course it is per month. Oh, why do you think you should be earning
that much on your first job? Well, because my current pocket money is
N200,000.00 and I feel that an employer should be able to pay me more
than my parents. I try very hard to compose myself, over parenting is
in my opinion the greatest evil handicapping the Nigerian youth. It is
at the root of our national malaise.

We have a youth population of tens of millions of who are being
"breastfed and diapered" well into their 30s. Even though the examples
I have given above are from parents of considerable affluence, similar
patterns can be observed from Abeokuta to Adamawa! Wake up mum! Wake
up dad! You practically love your children to death! No wonder
corruption continues to thrive. We have a society of young people who
have been brought up to expect something for nothing, as if it were a
birth right.

I want to encourage you to send your young men and women (anyone over
20 can hardly be called a child!) out into the world, maybe even
consider reducing or stopping the pocket money to encourage them to
think, explore and strive. Let them know that it is possible for them
to succeed without your "help".

Take a moment to think back to your own time as a young man/woman,
what if someone had kept spoon feeding you, would you be where you are
today? No tree grows well under another tree, children that are not
exposed to challenges, don't cook well. That is why you see adults
complaining, "my parents didn't buy clothes for me this Christmas",
ask him/her how old are you? 30 years +. Because of the challenges we
faced in our youth, we are where and what we are today. This
syndrome-my children will not suffer what I suffered is destroying our
tomorrow.

Deliberately, reduce their allowance or mum-don't cook on Saturday
till late afternoon or evening-do as occasion deserve.

I learnt the children of a former Nigerian head of state with all the
stolen (billions) monies in their custody, still go about with
security escort as wrecks. They are on drugs, several times because of
the drug, they collapse in public places. The escort will quickly pack
them and off they go, what a life! No one wants to marry them. Anyone
who stops learning is old, whether at twenty or eighty. Anyone who
keeps learning stays young. The greatest thing in life is to keep your
mind young.- Henry Ford. Hard work does not kill; everything in
Nigeria is going down, including family settings. It is time to cook
our children, preparing them for tomorrow. We are approaching the
season in Nigeria where only the RUGGED, will survive. How will your
ward fare?

If the present generation of Nigerian pilots retires, will you fly a
plane flown by a young Nigerian pilot, If trained in Nigeria ? People
now have first class, who cannot spell GRADUATE or read an article
without bomb blast! Which Way Nigeria ?, Which Way Nigerians!! Is this
how we will ALL sit and watch this country SINK?
(Please forward to as many Nigerian parents as you know)


Best regards,
Obinna






I believe in prayer. It's the best way to draw strength from heaven.

its a lie

Read in between the lines cos i kinda agree with him,

this so called letter was on saharareporters as an article submitted few weeks ago.

You are a big fool,I repeat big fool,it seems u need a job,how can u just write this kind of nonsense.

You senseless being

Whether it was on saharareporters or sudanreporters doesn't matter. Its the truth. I was almost a victim. I had to break loose from home myself. Normally its parents that should initiate this. I love my parents but sometimes a man has to go out on his own.

Good!!

How can we save the situation when the rich refuse to allow the masses to get anything? all they need is a phone call or Biz card

its a good write up but how do we save the situation?

I Fully agree. Nigerian parents are part of the problem facing our youths today. They encourage laziness in their children, all in the name of showing love (or class). Most parents are also too controling, and find it hard to allow the child to think and experience life for his/her self. How many parents will allow their 18yr old to work in a filling station or at a grocery store or in mr biggs. The mentality they have is that such work is for the less fortunate.
The result- lazy kids with no working ethics whatsoever.

pappy2000:

You are a big fool,I repeat big fool,it seems u need a job,how can u just write this kind of nonsense.

You senseless being

You are the big fool!!! Nigeria is a waste of space, Nigerian Youths are excuse of young human. I completely agree with most things the guy wrote. It is guy like you that refuse to think outside the box that weight Nigeria down. That country is doomed with the present youth inside.

if you think this is a nigerian problem, or a problem exclusive to nigerians then you have another think coming. this is a problem in countries with static economies and inflated cost of living. in italy kids stay at home till their mid forties before they move out and get their own places. even in england, with the soaring cost of houses, kids are staying home till their mid thirties and late thirties. i think its barbaric kicking your kids out of home in a static economy with crazy house prices in a country with no walfare services. if you are not ready to look after your own from cradle to grave, then do not have them. PERIOD.

I don't think its an issue of the rich. Poor parents only send their children out because of poverty. If they had more money they wouldn't. Look around, even middle class parents don't allow their kids do such small jobs. Its the mindset not necessarily a status issue. Like the OP said, hard work doesn't kill.

I read this thing 2 months ago and I must say I quite agree with what he has written.

I think its an old letter. well still a good read

This letter should be read on the floor of the National Assembly and then on the network news.

@poster

Please about those people in nairalanders sending you nonsense,please continue sending more advising we have a lot of dependant here in our nation who always snicking some one house looking moi-moi,akara,hand set,even Biro not left behind for their selfish desire and so on.


@nairalanders

Generally speaking many of our youths today are depend on their parent pocket,putting them in to hypertension and so on.Why my fellow youth? we suppose to shine bright and make next generation to look good.I my self i started with a security job here in Yola after having my diploma with only N8k monthly salary,gradually as i,m telling you now N40k is not my problem monthly.Every thing with God is possibly,even the Bible emphasized don't give a lazy man food.Cheer up my brother and work with thy hands for HE will surely see you through.


May God bless Nigeria.

[size=15pt]In the UK where you studied more young adults in 20s and 30s are living with parents than in past 20 years[/size] 



[size=13pt]The Office for National Statistics says many young adults in their mid-20s and early 30s, and especially men, are increasingly postponing the transition to adulthood.

One in three "adult-kids" who have not left the parental nest say they are still living at home because they cannot afford to get a toehold on the property ladder by buying or renting. But others, who have been dubbed kippers – kids in parents' pockets – are, say the demographers, staying through choice.[/size]

http://www.guardian.co.uk/society/2009/dec/08/young-adults-living-parental-home-ons

Win a brandnew IPAD here in nigeria. . . http://tinyurl .com/3w4ygu5

nolongTing:

[size=15pt]In the UK where you studied more young adults in 20s and 30s are living with parents than in past 20 years[/size] 



[size=13pt]The Office for National Statistics says many young adults in their mid-20s and early 30s, and especially men, are increasingly postponing the transition to adulthood.

One in three "adult-kids" who have not left the parental nest say they are still living at home because they cannot afford to get a toehold on the property ladder by buying or renting. But others, who have been dubbed kippers – kids in parents' pockets – are, say the demographers, staying through choice.[/size]

http://www.guardian.co.uk/society/2009/dec/08/young-adults-living-parental-home-ons

hey so you agree that nigerian youth should follow suit?

Anyone calling the poster a fool is THE REAL FOOL.

How many of you can even stand the author of this timely article published on the Opinion pages of The Guardian newspaper of September 21, 2011?

NIGERIAN FOOLS WILL NEVER LEARN ROM THEIR MISTAKES.
INTELLECTUAL MORONS!
IGNORANT POPULATION OF MASS FAILURES.

Go and read this book The Nigerian Fools Who Think They Can Fool God ,
http://www.amazon.com/Nigerian-Fools-Think-They-Fool/dp/1440401284

babaearly:

hey so you agree that nigerian youth should follow suit?

lol!

You are the big fool!!! Nigeria is a waste of space, Nigerian Youths are excuse of young human. I completely agree with most things the guy wrote. It is guy like you that refuse to think outside the box that weight Nigeria down. That country is doomed with the present youth inside.

Do I heard you called Nigeria a waste of space

Do  heard you say youth are excuse of human

Please kindly first identify yourself and tell me who a H E L L are you before I say anything to you but I bet you by the time I finish with you with that your unutured and leaked mouth you will hate the day you were born I bet you.

Please identify yourself??

You are the big fool!!! Nigeria is a waste of space, Nigerian Youths are excuse of young human. I completely agree with most things the guy wrote. It is guy like you that refuse to think outside the box that weight Nigeria down. That country is doomed with the present youth inside.

Please come back onlin and identify yourself

You are a big fool,I repeat big fool,it seems u need a job,how can u just write this kind of nonsense.

You senseless being

Does the article touch some familiar issues?
u dont have to overreact, the writer is simply trying to encourage us to take the right path

Before I proceed with my post, I would like to state that EVERYONE IS ENTITLED TO HIS/HER OWN OPINION:
THIS IS MINE:

I have seen this post before and I have taken time to read it once again and it keeps annoying me! I PERSONALLY BELIEVE WITH NO IOTA OF DOUBT IN MY MIND that the AUTHOR of this article IS NOT IN TUNED WITH THE REAL NIGERIAN YOUTH. (my opinion)

I have taken time to cut out some of his postings below:






1.Let me add the benefit of my time as a student and then resident in
the UK - and I live in Lagos now -    the writer was trained in the uk and may hardly have any idea of what nigerian undergraduates go thru



2.The first thing that I discovered
about UK-born, white, English undergraduates was that all of them did
holiday or weekend job to support themselves - including the children
of millionaires amongst them. - Of the total number of nigeria youth who write jamb year in year out how many are offered admission? talk less of being undergraduates

3.A quick survey would show you that only children from
Nigeria fly business or upper class to commence their studies in the
UK  - how many nigerian youth can their parents afford to send them to universities even here in nigeria talk less of abroad

4. "30 is the new 18" - wrong! it is even 14 years here in Naija, I know of hundreds of teenagers who hawk to make ends meet for their parents - the writer should go up north and see the level of poverty (almajiris etc) and know what's up

5. At age 18 years, a typical young adult in the UK leaves the clutches
of his/her parents for the University, chances are, that's the last
time those parents will ever play "landlord" to their son or daughter
except of course the occasional home visits during the academic year.  - Millions of even parents are still tenants to landlords, how much more the children

6. At 21 years and above or below, the now fully grown and independent
minded adult graduates from University, searches for employment, gets
a job and shares a flat with other young people on a journey into
becoming fully fledged adults. - At 21 yrs YOU GRADUATE IN THE UK/US ABROAD AND NOT IN NAIJA WITH STRIKES! 30 YEARS OLD ARE STILL JOB HUNTING HERE (2.1s inclusive0

7.I am UK trained
Recruitment Consultant - Ok now - uk trained - no wonder!

8.I enjoyed the savings
that I made from living on and off at my parent's house in London -
indeed that is the primary reason for my being able to buy myself a 3
bedroom flat in London at age 25 with absolutely no direct financial
help from my parents!  - at 25, the writer bought himself a 3 bedroom flat - here in Naija, 40 yrs HARDWORKING people are still struggling and hustling to buy a plot of land!

9.Meanwhile today, we have Nigerian children who have never worked for 5
minutes in their lives - THIS IS A LIE!!! (I STAND TO BE CORRECTED WITH EVIDENCE- EVEN ADENUGA'S CHILDREN WORK)



chances
are that big boy is cruising around Lagos with a babe dressed to the
nines, in his dad's spanking new SUV with enough "pocket money" to put
your salary to shame. It is not at all strange to have a 28 year old
who has NEVER worked for a day in his or her life in Nigeria but
"earns" a six figure "salary" from parents for doing absolutely
nothing. - ANOTHER LIE

We have a youth population of tens of millions of who are being
"breastfed and diapered" well into their 30s. - LIE

want to encourage you to send your young men and women (anyone over
20 can hardly be called a child!) out into the world, maybe even
consider reducing or stopping the pocket money to encourage them to
think, explore and strive. Let them know that it is possible for them
to succeed without your "help".




IN MY OPINION: I STATE THAT THE WRITER IS NOT IN TUNE WITH THE REAL NIGERIAN YOUTH!

CONSTRUCTIVE CRITICISMS ARE WELCOMED FROM THE REAL NIGERIAN YOUTHS!!!

@OP tanx 4 yur letter .

my God, what is going on here, why are people smarting from this article. this guy is obviously concerned about the state Nigeria youth and is trying to correct some anomalies. lets face it, we have lost our values, lets learn from this and try to make our children responsible adults they are supposed to be.

if you dont agree with this article, then pls go back to wearing your 20s and 30s diapers and feed them formula.

pls stop insulting the guy.

Old letter really though the message is still very much relevant. I got it from a friend like 6 months ago.

Guy , tell them! I appluad your courage and sense of reasoning

Poster, thank you very much for this beautiful Letter. I think this is a good advice for parents and in coming parents, because a lot of parents today have done more harm than good to their children in the name of i don't want my children to suffer or past through what i have past through. Please in other to change our country to a better place, please let us heed to the advice it will help the country and our children in the future. NOTE: THE POSTER DID NOT SAY, YOU SHOULD NOT TAKE CARE OF YOUR CHILDREN.

The author of this letter is a retarded autistic buffoon,

Please, all of you who fly abroad on a regular like myself, how many kids or teenagers do you see seated in business class?

How many children in the UK know how to hawk merchandise in traffic?! How many of those UK raised kids have ever had to walk miles to fetch water to bath or carry merchandise to the market for their parents and do some chores before going to school in the morning?

What has the car kate middleton drive have to do with anything?! At the age of 14, I could change a flat tyre in record time. I was already pushing the vehicle that took me to school to start every morning, I could change a car spark plug, at 18 I could diagonise the fault of a Yahama 2600KVA generator and even buy and change the bad parts. Whats this fool talking about?! So he is now going after rich kids?! I fly first class or business class everytime I travel becos my father has racked up so much air miles over the years that its would be a waste to fly economy when I could fly business. This retard schooled in the UK and has the ballz to spite Nigerian kids?! He is part of that rich wealthy class he is talking about.

My kid sister is 19, and she rocks Prada, Louis Vuitton, Gucci, Jimmy Choos, Fendi, Versace, e.t.c because I can afford it. I wouldnt want some Aristo somewhere to think he can woo her with money. Rather than say parents should kick their kids out at 22, I would say at 16, give them some assistance to venture into business of some sort. Let them try and fail so by the time they are 22, they would atleast be some sort of enterprenuer. Nigerian parents never tend to let their kids in on their source of income nor teach them the rope on how to make and manage money.

He bought a 3 bedroom flat at the age of 23 in London, but I can bet you it was on a mortgage that he would pay till he dies and transfers that debt to his kids. Meanwhile Nigerians would buy, build and rent houses by the time he is done financing that house. I hate the likes of him.

250'k per month?! And he thinks it too much?! This guy sucks monkey testicles,




The authour of this article is probably angry because while he was squeezed in between two obese people in boot class, some kids where sitting in first and business class sipping on champange (though they werent even 18) and eating cavier,

To the author:: Dont player hate you broke ass retard

To the poster,

In ur write up, between the lines of some paragraphs, u made sense. It is true that no matter how rich ur parents are in this part of the world, the children would work for their own money. They may enjoy certain priviledges because they have rich parents but not ridiculously as in the case of Nigeria.

But between the lines of some other paragraphs, u did not make sense. U took things too far, talking as if everything is okay in Nigeria. Do u think that this ridiculous trend would be sustained if there are holiday jobs here and there in Nigeria that young ppl can do as its the case in UK? No is the answer.

If u dont know, many young people are ready to leave their parents' house whether the parents like it or not and find a job so that they can earn their own money and feel responsible for themselves but unfortunately they have no option than to stay home cos there are no jobs out there. No adult will be comfortable with dad and mum telling u what to do even if they have bought u a car. U would have prefered to use ur own money to buy ur own car so no one tells u what to do with ur car.

Even the so called rich became so stupid about spoonfeeding their "ädult children" because these children have no other option. If u know that ur child can get a job that pays reasonably out there, they would bother less about over protecting them. Now pls read my comment very well, I am not defending these parents, I am just raising it as a point because one must discuss the cause of a problem before discussing the effect and then the solution.

Conclusion: As long as the Nigerian situation remains as it is, all these crazy trends will be sustained. Therefore u should have written a letter to the govt to at least provide job for young ppl and see whether this trend wil not die naturally