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Nairaland Forum / Entertainment / Jokes Etc / Good Laugh For Football Jokes (2376 Views)
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Good Laugh For Football Jokes by Nobody: 1:53pm On Sep 22, 2011 |
One evening Alex Ferguson’s phone rings. It’s the fire brigade telling him that Old Trafford is on fire. ‘The cups!’ shouts Ferguson. ‘Save the cups!’ ‘Don’t worry, sir,’ says the fireman. ‘The flames haven’t got to the canteen yet.’ 2 [/b]A chicken is playing in a football match and scores two early goals. ‘You’re very good,’ says the ref. ‘Do you train hard?’ ‘Yes,’ replies the chicken. ‘But it’s not easy. I’m a lawyer so I don’t get much free time.’ Hearing this, the ref pulls out the red card and orders the chicken off the pitch. ‘What’s the matter?’ says the chicken. The ref replies, ‘Professional fowl.’ [b]3 [/b]A football player is walking down the street when he sees a fire in a block of flats. He runs over to help and hears a woman calling from the top of the building. ‘Will someone save my baby!’ she yells. ‘The stairwell is blocked! There’s no way down! If I throw down my baby can somebody catch him?’ The footballer shouts back, ‘Fear not. I’m a professional goalkeeper! Throw down your baby and I promise I won’t drop him!’ So the mother throws down the baby and the goalkeeper makes a perfect catch – before bouncing it twice and kicking it 30 yards down the road. [b]4 A junior soccer team is playing a match one Sunday. Just before the kick-off the team coach approaches one of his young players. ‘Do you understand that you mustn’t swear at the ref if he gives you a card and you mustn’t attack an opponent if he fouls you ‘Yes,’ replies the boy. ‘Good,’ says the coach. ‘Now go and explain that to your mother.’ 5 Two flies are having a game of football in a saucer. ‘Our game had better improve soon,’ says one. ‘Next week we’re playing in the cup!’ ![]() ![]() ![]() 6 Harry has tickets for the World Cup final. As he sits in the stadium, a man comes over and asks if anyone is sitting in the seat next to him. ‘No,’ says Harry. ‘That seat is empty.’ ‘That’s incredible!’ says the man. ‘Who in their right mind would have a seat like this for the World Cup final and not use it?’ Harry replies, ‘Well, actually, I’ve got the tickets for both these seats. My wife was supposed to be here with me, but she passed away.’ ‘I’m sorry to hear that,’ says the man. ‘But couldn’t you find a friend or relative to take the seat?’ Harry shakes his head, ‘No, they’re all at the funeral.’ ![]() ![]() |
Re: Good Laugh For Football Jokes by lysaa(f): 11:04pm On Sep 22, 2011 |
Lol. the last n 1st tyt. |
Re: Good Laugh For Football Jokes by Nobody: 11:13pm On Sep 22, 2011 |
I never knew u were a soccer fanatic! ![]() |
Re: Good Laugh For Football Jokes by mcdokwe(m): 2:25am On Sep 23, 2011 |
sowie buh, i did not c d fun in this, maybe i need my jokestacle 2 c it |
Re: Good Laugh For Football Jokes by Nobody: 6:52am On Sep 23, 2011 |
Whateva |
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