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Women Aren`t Hardwired For Monogamy - Family - Nairaland

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Women Aren`t Hardwired For Monogamy by Hathor5(f): 10:03am On Jun 08, 2023
Please don`t kill the messenger. cheesy

"The Bored Sex

Women, more than men, tend to feel stultified by long-term exclusivity—despite having been taught that they were designed for it.
By Wednesday Martin

(...) Marta Meana of the University of Nevada at Las Vegas spelled it out simply in an interview with me at the annual Society for Sex Therapy and Research conference in 2017. “Long-term relationships are tough on desire, and particularly on female desire,” she said. I was startled by her assertion, which contradicted just about everything I’d internalized over the years about who and how women are sexually. Somehow I, along with nearly everyone else I knew, was stuck on the idea that women are in it for the cuddles as much as the orgasms, and—besides—actually require emotional connection and familiarity to thrive sexually, whereas men chafe against the strictures of monogamy.

But Meana discovered that “institutionalization of the relationship, overfamiliarity, and desexualization of roles” in a long-term heterosexual partnership mess with female passion especially—a conclusion that’s consistent with other recent studies.

“Moving In With Your Boyfriend Can Kill Your Sex Drive” was how Newsweek distilled a 2017 study of more than 11,500 British adults aged 16 to 74. It found that for “women only, lack of interest in sex was higher among those in a relationship of over one year in duration,” and that “women living with a partner were more likely to lack interest in sex than those in other relationship categories.” A 2012 study of 170 men and women aged 18 to 25 who were in relationships of up to nine years similarly found that women’s sexual desire, but not men’s, “was significantly and negatively predicted by relationship duration after controlling for age, relationship satisfaction, and sexual satisfaction.” Two oft-cited German longitudinal studies, published in 2002 and 2006, show female desire dropping dramatically over 90 months, while men’s holds relatively steady. (Tellingly, women who didn’t live with their partners were spared this amusement-park-ride-like drop—perhaps because they were making an end run around overfamiliarity.) And a Finnish seven-year study of more than 2,100 women, published in 2016, revealed that women’s sexual desire varied depending on relationship status: Those in the same relationship over the study period reported less desire, arousal, and satisfaction. Annika Gunst, one of the study’s co-authors, told me that she and her colleagues initially suspected this might be related to having kids. But when the researchers controlled for that variable, it turned out to have no impact. (...)"

https://www.theatlantic.com/ideas/archive/2019/02/women-get-bored-sex-long-term-relationships/582736/

9 Likes 1 Share

Re: Women Aren`t Hardwired For Monogamy by pocohantas(f): 10:06am On Jun 08, 2023
You want them to kill you?

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Re: Women Aren`t Hardwired For Monogamy by Hathor5(f): 10:09am On Jun 08, 2023
pocohantas:
You want them to kill you?

I will go into exile if I must. grin

5 Likes

Re: Women Aren`t Hardwired For Monogamy by Mindlog: 10:40am On Jun 08, 2023
It is a fact in human sexuality that females were socialized into monogamy, take for example many ancient tribes in today's Brazil practiced multiple paternity where a woman had multiple male sexual partners and when she gets pregnant, all the men she was in sexual relationships with would take care of the pregnancy and provide for the child after birth

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Re: Women Aren`t Hardwired For Monogamy by Acidosis(m): 11:27am On Jun 08, 2023
Lol cheesy
Re: Women Aren`t Hardwired For Monogamy by izonborn098(m): 11:38am On Jun 08, 2023
And you think those men live a reasonable life
Mindlog:
It is a fact in human sexuality that females were socialized into monogamy, take for example many ancient tribes in today's Brazil practiced multiple paternity where a woman had multiple male sexual partners and when she gets pregnant, all the men she was in sexual relationships with would take care of the pregnancy and provide for the child after birth

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Re: Women Aren`t Hardwired For Monogamy by Mindlog: 11:40am On Jun 08, 2023
izonborn098:
And you think those men live a reasonable life

In your own words, what does living a reasonable life mean?

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Re: Women Aren`t Hardwired For Monogamy by cococandy(f): 5:39pm On Jun 08, 2023
izonborn098:
And you think those men live a reasonable life
as reasonable a life as those multiple women married to one husband live

12 Likes 1 Share

Re: Women Aren`t Hardwired For Monogamy by izonborn098(m): 5:52pm On Jun 08, 2023
cococandy:
as reasonable a life as those multiple women married to one husband live
pls just tell the truth, will you allow your son to do that as a responsible mother u are, marrying one woman with different men. I need your sincere answer pls
Re: Women Aren`t Hardwired For Monogamy by cococandy(f): 5:57pm On Jun 08, 2023
izonborn098:
pls just tell the truth, will you allow your son to do that as a responsible mother u are, marrying one woman with different men. I need your sincere answer pls

Answer first. If you will let your daughter share one man, you should be okay with your son sharing one woman. I’ve never been in support of polygamy. So my answer is consistent regardless of gender. But the question is are you a hypocrite? Do you support polygamy when it’s a woman but suddenly frothing at the mouth when it’s a man?

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Re: Women Aren`t Hardwired For Monogamy by izonborn098(m): 6:07pm On Jun 08, 2023
cococandy:


Answer first. If you will let your daughter share one man, you should be okay with your son sharing one woman. I’ve never been in support of polygamy. So my answer is consistent regardless of gender. But the question is are you a hypocrite? Do you support polygamy when it’s a woman but suddenly frothing at the mouth when it’s a man?
why calling me Hypocrite, to your question, in nigeria a man can marry more than one woman it has being in existence before u were born, i dont mind my daughter been polgamy marriage if she is happy with the union i am fine, but i will disown my son for marrying one woman with another man because it is taboo and he doest not know his self worth and i dont even want my son to marry a single mom too.

2 Likes 1 Share

Re: Women Aren`t Hardwired For Monogamy by cococandy(f): 6:09pm On Jun 08, 2023
Oh a hypocrite. Got it!
izonborn098:
why calling me Hypocrite, to your question, in nigeria a man can marry more one woman it has being in existence before u were born, i dont mind my daughter been polgamy marriage if she is happy with the union i am fine, but i will disown my son for marrying one woman with another man because it is taboo and he doest not know his self worth, i dont even want my son to marry a single mom.

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Re: Women Aren`t Hardwired For Monogamy by izonborn098(m): 6:12pm On Jun 08, 2023
cococandy:
Oh a hypocrite. Got it!
are you a single mom?

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Re: Women Aren`t Hardwired For Monogamy by Mindlog: 6:40pm On Jun 08, 2023
izonborn098:
are you a single mom?

Has single motherhood been classified as a mental disorder?

7 Likes

Re: Women Aren`t Hardwired For Monogamy by talk2hb1(m): 7:19pm On Jun 08, 2023
je ne comprends pas
Re: Women Aren`t Hardwired For Monogamy by cococandy(f): 7:34pm On Jun 08, 2023
izonborn098:
are you a single mom?

Stupid question. What does my supposed single motherhood have to do with your glaring hypocrisy. You don’t think a man should share his woman because it means he doesn’t know his worth. Yet you can’t apply the same common sense to your hypocrisy of thinking it’s okay for women to do so.

Some of you don’t have the IQ of a gnat. You especially. I feel like I already know your other accounts because there’s no way two or more people of the exact same mental deficit exist in the same space at the same time. It’s gotta be you and your weird lopsided logic

16 Likes 1 Share

Re: Women Aren`t Hardwired For Monogamy by Belafonte(m): 8:45pm On Jun 08, 2023
Totally agree. Most men would want to deny this though

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Re: Women Aren`t Hardwired For Monogamy by izonborn098(m): 9:29pm On Jun 08, 2023
Madam calm down i am not the cause of your pains, sorry for adding salt to your wound you can go ahead and marry any amount of men u want to marry is your fucking life since you dey claim femenism
cococandy:


Stupid question. What does my supposed single motherhood have to do with your glaring hypocrisy. You don’t think a man should share his woman because it means he doesn’t know his worth. Yet you can’t apply the same common sense to your hypocrisy of thinking it’s okay for women to do so.

Some of you don’t have the IQ of a gnat. You especially. I feel like I already know your other accounts because there’s no way two or more people of the exact same mental deficit exist in the same space at the same time. It’s gotta be you and your weird lopsided logic

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Re: Women Aren`t Hardwired For Monogamy by izonborn098(m): 9:35pm On Jun 08, 2023
Mindlog:


Has single motherhood been classified as a mental disorder?
i have seen few with aggressive disorder

5 Likes 2 Shares

Re: Women Aren`t Hardwired For Monogamy by Vision101(m): 9:42pm On Jun 08, 2023
When a man marries more than one wife he takes responsibility for their up keep. Will the woman that has two or more husbands take responsibility for their up keep? Oya feminists answer

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Re: Women Aren`t Hardwired For Monogamy by Mindlog: 10:00pm On Jun 08, 2023
izonborn098:
i have seen few with aggressive disorder

just as we have many married men and women who exhibits aggressive behaviours.

Going by the standard for classification of mental disorders used by mental health professionals , aggressive disorder is not stated rather Intermittent Explosive Disorder (IED).

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Re: Women Aren`t Hardwired For Monogamy by izonborn098(m): 10:03pm On Jun 08, 2023
Mindlog:


just as we have many married men and women who exhibits aggressive behaviours.

Going by the standard for classification of mental disorders used by mental health professionals , aggressive disorder is not stated rather Intermittent Explosive Disorder (IED).
if you dont get it, then u can go to court

1 Like

Re: Women Aren`t Hardwired For Monogamy by Mindlog: 10:12pm On Jun 08, 2023
izonborn098:
if you dont get it, then u can go to court

I need not go to court because I can easily counter your falsehood of linking your "aggressive disorder" to single motherhood, a clear indication you know nothing about personality disorders nor have you administered and scored IED-SQs to reach the conclusion that it is exclusive to single mothers.

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Re: Women Aren`t Hardwired For Monogamy by izonborn098(m): 10:15pm On Jun 08, 2023
Mindlog:


I need not go to court because I can easily counter your falsehood of linking your "aggressive disorder" to single motherhood, a clear indication you know nothing about personality disorders nor have you administered and scored IED-SQs to reach the conclusion that it is exclusive to single mothers.
i think u have mental problem, but sorry i am not the cause of your pains. Cheers

1 Like

Re: Women Aren`t Hardwired For Monogamy by Mindlog: 10:26pm On Jun 08, 2023
izonborn098:
i think u have mental problem, but sorry i am not the cause of your pains. Cheers

I studied and get paid working with those struggling with mental health related issues.......you are not insulting me rather your every post gives me a clearer image of how the wheels of your mind is rotating . cheesy cheesy cheesy cheesy cheesy

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Re: Women Aren`t Hardwired For Monogamy by izonborn098(m): 10:29pm On Jun 08, 2023
Mindlog:


I studied and get paid working with those struggling with mental health related issues.......you are not insulting me rather your every post gives me a clearer image of how the wheels of your mind is rotating . cheesy cheesy cheesy cheesy cheesy
I cannot waste my precious time with u

1 Like

Re: Women Aren`t Hardwired For Monogamy by Mindlog: 10:46pm On Jun 08, 2023
izonborn098:
I cannot waste my precious time with u

You don't need to. cheesy cheesy cheesy cheesy

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Re: Women Aren`t Hardwired For Monogamy by Neverlookback: 11:07pm On Jun 08, 2023
I have always been under the impression that the it is the females that decide to marry into a polygamous household. They were not forced or coerced into it.

Since you are not a fan of such family setting, would it not be prudent for you to advise the unmarried females against going into these settings rather than attacking a man for the outcome?
cococandy:


Answer first. If you will let your daughter share one man, you should be okay with your son sharing one woman. I’ve never been in support of polygamy. So my answer is consistent regardless of gender. But the question is are you a hypocrite? Do you support polygamy when it’s a woman but suddenly frothing at the mouth when it’s a man?

2 Likes

Re: Women Aren`t Hardwired For Monogamy by cococandy(f): 11:33pm On Jun 08, 2023
Both of them are complicit?
Neverlookback:
I have always been under the impression that the it is the females that decide to marry into a polygamous household. They were not forced or coerced into it.

Since you are not a fan of such family setting, would it not be prudent for you to advise the unmarried females against going into these settings rather than attacking a man for the outcome?

1 Like

Re: Women Aren`t Hardwired For Monogamy by Neverlookback: 12:16am On Jun 09, 2023
How?
cococandy:
Both of them are complicit?
Re: Women Aren`t Hardwired For Monogamy by Hathor5(f): 4:46am On Jun 09, 2023
Vision101:
When a man marries more than one wife he takes responsibility for their up keep. Will the woman that has two or more husbands take responsibility for their up keep? Oya feminists answer

No, she will marry several men and they still will be taking care of her financially. I think that`s better. wink

7 Likes

Re: Women Aren`t Hardwired For Monogamy by Hathor5(f): 4:46am On Jun 09, 2023
Belafonte:
Totally agree. Most men would want to deny this though

Really? I was surprised when I stumbled upon it.

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