kkins25:
Help me and ask them. Their church pastors also demonize family planning.

Family planning is against growth as far as their Churchian businesses as concerned, so what do you expect?

Klass99:


No, sweet heart you and majority of others have got it twisted. There are essentially three purposes for marriage;

1. Companionship
2. Sex and
3. Procreation.

You can decide to get married for one of those reasons alone, two of them only or all three of them. I can decide I want marriage for the sex and companionship only without children and there will be nothing wrong with that. The purpose of marriage is not just to start a family but to love and be loved, to have a good companion to do life with through the highs and lows.

Please don't come back with the argument of God said [/i]mulltiply and be fruitful, that argument is stale and obsolete because;

1. We have since been given a superior commandment - love your God and your neighbour as yourself.
2. Multiply and be fruitful is not just about procreating more human beings, it is about increase in terms of knowledge, skills and wealth generation. Passing on that knowledge, training others with that skill/ability, to generate more wealth or replicate successful empires that do good for humanity.

We have serious issues with our thinking, mentality and[i] some cultural practices in Africa and the parts of your text I highlighted in bold is one of them, no offence to you because I don't mean that as a diss or insult. We need to rethink cultural practices that hurt us more than they help us, what is the point of marrying to start a family, when you cannot afford the children?

Marrying for companionship or marrying for sex ... neither has been .... or is the norm of African culture. The two come as a result of marriage ... but are never the primary purpose of marriage. The culture you are proposing we adapt is that of the LGBTQ community.

1. Marriage for companionship .... a man can marry a man or a woman marry a woman.... all will qualify.

2. Marriage for sex .... same as above.

3. Procreation ... the primary purpose of marriage.

African culture a man is expected to have enough to start and raise a family at the point of marriage. What happens after is not guaranteed. In what culture is it different?... where people who marry are all able to afford to raise their children? Should we rethink and involve the government in our family affairs? ... like in the "advanced cultures"?
Sadly... we are doing exactly that and yet we wonder what's wrong with "nowadays children".

This is a discussion forum and if I should feel insulted if you disagree with my view then I need not be here. Feel free to disagree.

Klass99:


No, sweet heart you and majority of others have got it twisted. There are essentially three purposes for marriage;

1. Companionship
2. Sex and
3. Procreation.

You can decide to get married for one of those reasons alone, two of them only or all three of them. I can decide I want marriage for the sex and companionship only without children and there will be nothing wrong with that. The purpose of marriage is not just to start a family but to love and be loved, to have a good companion to do life with through the highs and lows.

Please don't come back with the argument of God said mulltiply and be fruitful, that argument is stale and obsolete because;

1. We have since been given a superior commandment - love your God and your neighbour as yourself.
2. Multiply and be fruitful is not just about procreating more human beings, it is about increase in terms of knowledge, skills and wealth generation. Passing on that knowledge, training others with that skill/ability, to generate more wealth or replicate successful empires that do good for humanity.

We have serious issues with our thinking, mentality and some cultural practices in Africa and the parts of your text I highlighted in bold is one of them, no offence to you because I don't mean that as a diss or insult. We need to rethink cultural practices that hurt us more than they help us, what is the point of marrying to start a family, when you cannot afford the children?

Interesting @bolded. What knowledge and skills when there was no hard labour? It clearly meant multiply biologically.

kkins25:
■ Interesting @bolded. What knowledge and skills when there was no hard labour? It clearly meant multiply biologically.

○ No hard labor- Genesis 3 vs 16 - 19?
○We read in Genesis 4 of Cain building a city and you say there was no hard labor?
○ in Matthew 19 vs 11-12 we read that the same God created some Eunuchs from their birth so how could it have meant simply to multiply biologically?

Klass99:


You have gone off the rails and completely lost me with this rebuttal . I am not proposing and will never propose an LGBTQ culture of marriage. How on earth did you arrive at that conclusion from my post?

For your information the three essential purposes of marriage I cited was learnt from the Anglican church and an Anglican priest who officiated a wedding, which provided clarity and insight, and has stuck with me over the years. I am not even Anglican but his message was a profound light bulb moment for me.

We are not slaves to culture is what some of us are saying. If two heterosexual adults (male and female) who are Nigerians or Africans, decide to break away from this cultural norm of marriage you are fixated on, to marry for sex and companionship only, where is the harm in that? And what is wrong with their choice? Or evil about it?

Please note this, sit with it for a moment and think it through without arguing - marriage and children are life choices NOT mandatory goals or achievements, we all have to meet, in order to unlock happiness or the adult phase of our lives.

Two of the three "essential purposes of marriages" open the door for gay marriages. I briefly showed how. I'm not at all surprised you learned this from the Anglican Church ... a Priest ... after all ... doesn't the Anglican Church allow gay marriages?

I don't know who is saying or implying we must be slaves to culture. Culture evolves. Some people always break away from norms ... laws ... culture ... dress etc ... everyone cannot be on the same page. People can marry for their own reasons but that doesn't change the basic purpose of marriage .... to start and raise a family. Who is saying marriage is mandatory? Men marry men.... women marry women ... for sex or companionship.... but it's not normal in our culture. What would you say about a brother marrying a sister for sex and companionship to unlock happiness in their adult stage of life? Would you support it?

,

Kobojunkie:
○ No hard labor- Genesis 3 vs 16 - 19?
○We read in Genesis 4 of Cain building a city and you say there was no hard labor?
○ in Matthew 19 vs 11-12 we read that the same God created some Eunuchs from their birth so how could it have meant simply to multiply biologically?

was the command given before or after the said verses?

kkins25:
was the command given before or after the said verses?

Before.

Kobojunkie:
Before.

was there hard labor at this time?

kkins25:
■ was there hard labor at this time?

At what time?

You want them to be looking at each other like pictures, ur reasoning na wa

Skyview01:
This is a big question I try to wrap my head around and not getting any answer.

I see a lot of couple stressed out financially after marriage and within six month, the wife is pregnant.

If the wife is not pregnant after six months, the parents are worried if something is wrong with the woman or the man and the couple start getting strange stares from the pastor and members of the church.

Why not have a three year family planning immediately after the wedding, this has lots of advantage, first the couple is able to recover from the wedding, secondly, they are able to save and prepare for the arrival of babies, also they are able to enjoy each other before the babies.

This is a wrong aspect of our culture i would like to see changed in our society and its affecting marriages.


Whats your thought?

talented321:
You want them to be looking at each other like pictures, ur reasoning na wa

Keep quiet if you have nothing to say or rather learn and observe.

I blame the two people that bring you this world

Skyview01:


Keep quiet if you have nothing to say or rather learn and observe.

talented321:
I blame the two people that bring you this world

Keep quiet!

Klass99:


Read that again carefully - yes, in the biblical context and at the initial stage of humanity when only Adam & Eve existed, that may have very well meant multiply biologically only. But do not turn off your capacity to think because.......

In today's world where humanity has evolved, there is population explosion and hard labour, multiply and be fruitful can very well mean increase, in terms of knowledge, skills and wealth creation. Particularly in a business context, in economic enterprise, and not just biological increase of human beings.

Will you say the founder of Zenith Bank has not multiplied and been fruitful, in terms of providing work opportunities and income sources for thousands of people? From creating Zenith Bank to Visafone Communications, The Civic Centre and James Hope University, now that is the sort of increase (a.k.a multiply and be frutiful) I am talking about which empowers and serves humanity well. Not the biological one we are crazily obsessed with.

In context with the quote in question, it meant to reproduce. Don't mind me, I itch when i see verse given meaning to suit 21st century line of thought..

Originalsly:


Two of the three "essential purposes of marriages" open the door for gay marriages. I briefly showed how. I'm not at all surprised you learned this from the Anglican Church ... a Priest ... after all ... doesn't the Anglican Church allow gay marriages?

I don't know who is saying or implying we must be slaves to culture. Culture evolves. Some people always break away from norms ... laws ... culture ... dress etc ... everyone cannot be on the same page. People can marry for their own reasons but that doesn't change the basic purpose of marriage .... to start and raise a family. Who is saying marriage is mandatory? Men marry men.... women marry women ... for sex or companionship.... but it's not normal in our culture. What would you say about a brother marrying a sister for sex and companionship to unlock happiness in their adult stage of life? Would you support it?

Very good point. The logic should be spread across the board and not those that we like alone..

A poor man can become rich tomorrow. What I don't subscribe to is the very poor having more than 2 children.

Skyview01:
This is a big question I try to wrap my head around and not getting any answer.

I see a lot of couple stressed out financially after marriage and within six month, the wife is pregnant.

If the wife is not pregnant after six months, the parents are worried if something is wrong with the woman or the man and the couple start getting strange stares from the pastor and members of the church.

Why not have a three year family planning immediately after the wedding, this has lots of advantage, first the couple is able to recover from the wedding, secondly, they are able to save and prepare for the arrival of babies, also they are able to enjoy each other before the babies.

This is a wrong aspect of our culture i would like to see changed in our society and its affecting marriages.


Whats your thought?

U can't leave a goat and yam and expect it not to eat the yam

falcon01:
Then you are better of alone

I get the gist but no one is better off alone.