Mindlog:


If she packs out of the home to another rented apartment or the one she built, what happens?

Nothing, but she cannot bring another man to her matrimonial home especially where she has kids for the late husband

mmadu5:
in my place ondo state you will be shot and killed by the mans family before you can follow another man.

Where in Ondo state is this?

So after sleeping with her it's now you want to cut ties, after enjoying your self it's now that things are running through your mind. Just tell us you didn't see her the way you expect and you want to dump her and move to the next woman. Fear God, From what I know once a man dies, the ties is broken after she has performed the mourning rites to her late husband, except she didn't do the needful and who knows if she has a hand in the man's death. Just discuss with her to know if she did all that was required after the demise of her husband.

eldoradoxx:
Nothing, but she cannot bring another man to her matrimonial home especially where she has kids for the late husband

Matrimonial home, I guess you mean the house the man built because if she is moves into another rented house or a house she built, there is nothing matrimonial about it anymore.

fineboynl:
I’m in a serious situation. i have been dating this young widow for a while now without any issues.

But From the day I slept with her i have been noticing some things i don’t want to talk about.

Many things have been going through my mind concerning her.

From the igbo/Yoruba and all other cultures in Nigeria. What should a widow do before she start sleeping with another man? Should she returned the bride price?

Because I’m considering cutting ties with her and go for deliverance.

What killed the husband?? B4 it kills you too!!!!!


Think deep

mariahAngel:



How long has her late husband been dead before you slept with her?
Does she have children (by her late husband)?

she has children and she keep tie with the family as they still assist her.

Berrityga:
For better for worst till death do us part. Simpl English but hard to understand. I don’t know why a widow who swore till death do us part wants to still chop gbola. It’s just insane.

Did you even understand what you typed

Till DEATH do us part not FOREVER.

after death, nothing bind you with the person irrespective

Berrityga:
For better for worst till death do us part. Simpl English but hard to understand. I don’t know why a widow who swore till death do us part wants to still chop gbola. It’s just insane.

Widow: woman wey her husband don die

Till death do us part: D death of her husband already separated them

fineboynl:
I’m in a serious situation. i have been dating this young widow for a while now without any issues.

But From the day I slept with her i have been noticing some things i don’t want to talk about.

Many things have been going through my mind concerning her.

From the igbo/Yoruba and all other cultures in Nigeria. What should a widow do before she start sleeping with another man? Should she returned the bride price?

Because I’m considering cutting ties with her and go for deliverance.

Return to who?
The dead?
The husband paid bride price, not family members.
My answer is NO

IamAsiri:


Where in Ondo state is this?

Ikare Akoko to be precise

fineboynl:
I’m in a serious situation. i have been dating this young widow for a while now without any issues.

But From the day I slept with her i have been noticing some things i don’t want to talk about.

Many things have been going through my mind concerning her.

From the igbo/Yoruba and all other cultures in Nigeria. What should a widow do before she start sleeping with another man? Should she returned the bride price?

Because I’m considering cutting ties with her and go for deliverance.

She should let her late husband's family know about her intention and also the bride price should be returned

Berrityga:
For better for worst till death do us part. Simpl English but hard to understand. I don’t know why a widow who swore till death do us part wants to still chop gbola. It’s just insane.

You typed the commitment promised by both party yet you do not understand what you typed, death of either party automatically set the other person free from the commitment.
Come to think of it, if you are in her shoes, will you keep out of sex forever? Witchcraft is not by flying at night alone, it also involved forcing others to do what you can't do half of

Death ends it all. Start afresh.

She refused some burial rites to detach the husbands spirit form her , a soul tie is present and its dangerous, she should go back to his family and redo or complete those rites or the malevolent will strike

MrsTwrite:
Hmmm... This is weird, I think you should discuss with her, she should open up, perhaps she's hiding something.

@Op, listen to this post here.

I will also add, her family should return her bride price if she wants to move on with her life.

Although I don't know if I agree with this next line buy returning the bride price, the late husband's family could collect everything that their brother bought for her.. if she is living in the late brothers house, they could kick her out , some might even go to the extent of collecting the kids from her (if they have a kid together).

But yet still, the first thing first. Have a candid conversation with her and you both can figure a way forward.

Cheers!!

@fineboynl

In some cultures if the widow as much as cook for the children she had with the late husband with money from the new man without returning dowry and prayer, the children will fall sick and might lead to their death if not discovered and addressed quickly. When it comes to married women and widows, tread with uttermost caution.

author=TotoGame post=125366508]

Igbo Culture! A widow that wishes to remarry must return her bride price to her husband's family [/quote]

Brideprice must be returned

Mindlog:
In Igbo culture, the widow and her family do not return any bride price upon the death of the husband as the marriage ended with the death of the husband, not divorce.

That's incorrect.

Respectfully speaking, may be in your hometown that's how it is done.

But I have seen a scenario in igbo land were after the mourning period they ask the widow if she wants to stay with the husband family or move on and go back to her parents house.

Then if she chose to move on and move back to her parents house. Bride price is returned (at a later date).

Generally, one cannot pay a bride price twice on top of one lady. The old bride price have to be returned before they can pay the new bride price.

Cheers!

Whalis:

The same with my tradition.

wait. For example, we know that Igbo bride price could be high running into millions. Are you saying if she is Igbo she should return every dime, when she is probably not in a good place financially?
@ badgers14

In Urhobo tradition, the family of the woman will return the bride price to the late husband's family and then she can move on with her life.

Omoluabi16:
wait. For example, we know that Igbo bride price could be high running into millions. Are you saying if she is Igbo she should return every dime, when she is probably not in a good place financially?
@ badgers14

Aside all the items there is usually an amount specifically called bride price

Death did them part. Nothing else matters

fineboynl:
I’m in a serious situation. i have been dating this young widow for a while now without any issues.

But From the day I slept with her i have been noticing some things i don’t want to talk about.

Many things have been going through my mind concerning her.

From the igbo/Yoruba and all other cultures in Nigeria. What should a widow do before she start sleeping with another man? Should she returned the bride price?

Because I’m considering cutting ties with her and go for deliverance.

fineboynl:
I’m in a serious situation. i have been dating this young widow for a while now without any issues.

But From the day I slept with her i have been noticing some things i don’t want to talk about.

Many things have been going through my mind concerning her.

From the igbo/Yoruba and all other cultures in Nigeria. What should a widow do before she start sleeping with another man? Should she returned the bride price?

Because I’m considering cutting ties with her and go for deliverance.

When did her husband die

Badgers14:


That's incorrect.

Respectfully speaking, may be in your hometown that's how it is done.

But I have seen a scenario in igbo land were after the mourning period they ask the widow if she wants to stay with the husband family or move on and go back to her parents house.

Then if she chose to move on and move back to her parents house. Bride price is returned (at a later date).

Generally, one cannot pay a bride price twice on top of one lady. The old bride price have to be returned before they can pay the new bride price.

Cheers!

It will be interesting to know the community or communities in igboland that practices such.

Omoluabi16:
wait. For example, we know that Igbo bride price could be high running into millions. Are you saying if she is Igbo she should return every dime, when she is probably not in a good place financially?
@ badgers14

Igbo bride price is not that high.. what could be high there is other things requested in the list like 20 tubers of yam.. 10 carton of this and that ..

But the actual bride price is usually not that high. And typically what the girls family normally do is, if the bride price was say 20k, the father of the bride will take 2k and give the rest back to the inlaws and tell them , his daughter is not for sale.. let them take care of his daughter etc...

(At least thats what my father did and I have been at other places in igbo land where the same was done as well).

Mindlog:


It will be interesting to know the community or communities in igboland that practices such.

Where do I start

I have witnessed that in Imo and Anambra state, heard about it in Abia state as well.

gare2510:


Aside all the items there is usually an amount specifically called bride price

wow. Okay..

Badgers14:


Where do I start

I have witnessed that in Imo and Anambra state, heard about it in Abia state as well.

Name the communities in Imo and Anambra that do that, so I can enquire further.

This is oddball.
It is better you discuss it with her. she may be ignorance of your own assumption and whatever you envisage.
However, she may open up to you if she is hiding anything from you the moment you tell her your own observations.
Good luck

Badgers14:


Igbo bride price is not that high.. what could be high there is other things requested in the list like 20 tubers of yam.. 10 carton of this and that ..

But the actual bride price is usually not that high. And typically what the girls family normally do is, if the bride price was say 20k, the father of the bride will take 2k and give the rest back to the inlaws and tell them , his daughter is not for sale.. let them take care of his daughter etc...

(At least thats what my father did and I have been at other places in igbo land where the same was done as well).

okay. Thank you for your response.

Death do them apart is a white man wedding.

Africa wedding is marriage to the family that's why bride price are paid.

The white people don't pay bride price.

As far as she is still using her late husband surname. She is still married to that family.

And each family with their culture and traditions.

The white people culture the marriage ends. But Africa culture is different.