The most difficult age for any man born in Nigeria should be between 24 and 29 years, the pressure to succeed- to be something, to be someone is so immense. When you look around you everyone seems to be doing something for themselves, people seem to be living a life you only dream of. You have applied for jobs and the results have been more disappointing than Yakubu Aiyegbeni goal miss at the world cup.


Sadly this is the age when most guys lose it because the disappointments become too much and you find alternative ways to face reality. Worse is when a few people you studied with have been lucky enough to land jobs. Soon your circle of friends gets thinner – mostly they don’t even cut you out but you will be real with yourself and cut yourself off. I mean what will you do when you are in a WhatsApp group of friends and they are discussing about last week’s trip in Dubai and planning another trip to South Africa while you are not sure of what your next meal would be?


Most times you follow the conversation silently, all alone like a cross on the grave. Soon you realize this is no longer your kind of crowd because the more you keep around, the more the pressure to be something, takes a toll on you. You know when stories about house parties
come up and you act deaf because you don’t know where an extra 5 guys would fit in your house. Have you ever sat in a group of people discussing the new iPhone on the market or how British Airways offers poo services and you can feel your heart whisper to you "boss this is chest pain hour, can we just go and find a group that talks about GMAT, SHL, Dragnet, jobberman or job vacancies sites". But you sit there as these people are lost in their lifestyle conversations, you are like a secretary taking minutes in meeting.


After a few years of job hunting, you are now ready to take anything even if is to smell a rich man’s farts as long as it pays, so you end up as an office messenger in one blue chip company in town. To imagine that 4-5 years of studying and getting a degree is now reduced to picking and dropping off letters and if you are not doing that, you are being sent for cheap lunch by the employees when they are broke and they can’t order with fast food. This is when conversations about where people schooled start, you go silent for it’s no longer of any use to say you also reached University, it doesn’t matter – you have resorted to surviving.


Once in while you will bump into your now well to do classmates, they would offer you lunch, but not even eating the meals at Eko Hotel or Sheraton will make you feel better about yourself, because in your mind you wish instead they would give you the 30k and you sort your meals for the next 5 weeks. As it is the norm you will have photos taken, and uploaded on Facebook, but always it’s your face that would look the odd one out – not even the best filters can hide a face which has suffered the city's dust and sun but survives on boiled beans.


The worst mistake you can do is to try and date at this point – there is nothing that a person going through such times can offer in terms of love. How are you going to do evening romantic walks when you are tired from walking delivering letters in offices around town? What are you going to tell your lady when she says she wants to go for relaxation at the bar, pool or love garden sites that are in town? That your financial religion doesn’t allow it or what? This is the age when you sit back and watch as the ladies you would want to date are dating or getting married to guys 10 years older than you. And you can’t blame them – it’s only that your life seems to be progressing slower than their goals in life. Most of the ladies you meet during this period, if you are lucky will be patient with you till you hit 28, and if by then your life is still in disarray, then my friend be prepared for a walk out.

In this video: the pressure to succeed, everyday Nigerians like you share their heartfelt experiences facing the pressure to succeed and how to hack through this stage of life. Their conversation exposes a lot about handling disappointments, friendships, love, career growth and personal responsibility as well as persevering and appreciating each day's small wins,


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iQXlcflI1D4

If you've ever felt alone, realize that there are several folks like you who are dealing with difficult times. How you live your life in the 30’s is determined by how you handled your life in this phase. Do not Give up. Do not Be Depressed. remain focused and create a Strategy. Be consistent, you must Surely Win. Peace

Change your Topic heading to Poor/Average Family.

If you are from a Rich/Wealthy Background. You will worry so less about Nigeria's Woes.

Evolutionlove:
Change your Topic heading to Poor/Average Family.

If you are from a Rich/Wealthy Background. You will worry so less about Nigeria's Woes.

done

ideamonster:


done

Are you within that age range?

This is depressing because it is true.

The rules of the game have changed, and fathers should be coaching their sons, to not go through the same path as others.

The time people wasted in uni studying a useless course would have been channeled to do better things.

But again, youthful exuberance won't allow lots of young people to just focus and understand that the playfulness of today is the regret of tomorrow.

A man will have to pick one of two poisons. The first one is to suffer very hard in his 20s, then life can be soft on him in his 30s,

or sadly, to live without intention thinking the future will just set itself up. It is sad that a lot of people have to get old before they know that time is life.

For men, their most golden age is their 20s. It's the age of no responsibilities, the best physical strength, no baggage, and time flexibility. He must spend this age wisely, to prepare for another stage of life in his 30s.

Then life will be very soft on him. Friends will love and respect him, women will love and want to be with him, and his society will give him warmth.

There is no guarantee of success after much suffering, but you miss all the shots you didn't take, so it's always better to shoot.

See as I just dey laugh...

Op u hav made valid points and ill like to say that contentment is the way to go for every young man out there . U may nt be where you want to be yet, but dont be too desperate to be like the other guys you see on social media who apear to be living the life. Take it easy. most of them are into a lot of shits to live such kind of lifestyle and drive big cars and all of it but deep inside of them they lack hapines and peace...

Start combing your friends and seeing what they do.

Look for skills to learn from them except fraud.

If I become president I will make a law that fraud will land you in 5 years jail term and no option of fine and also the forfeiture of all your wealth.

We can not build a nation where youths will see fraud and hook up as way.


I will be like peter Obi.

No stealing or any form wealth under in guise or loophole.

But the painful part in all these, is that those who support political leaders aimlessly are in this age bracket.
At times I just wonder if those monikers are really humans or computer virus. How can one be suffering and still be praising corrupt leaders that are flexing with Nigerian money?
To me, tribalism and religious fanaticism are mostly responsible for their annoying behaviors.
Lastly, another reason that a full grown adult will be supporting evil rather than thinking of calling out those wicked politicians is that they might be employed secretly solely for the purpose of propaganda or they might be foreigners who have nothing to lose if the country burn down.
I am even tired of lamenting in nairaland concerning the mindset of the youths. Everyone should continue with their nonsense attitude.

To anyone reading this, any mistake you make withing the ages of 20 to 30 will follow you for the rest of your life!

The most difficult age is between 25 - 30yrs due to societal and peer pressure to make it in life.
Everyone has their time and season... some are early bloomers, some bloom much later in life.

My biggest regret till today is that I failed to learn a skill before I went to university, I rushed into university, without tangible skills, after wasting so much studying stupiid courses offered by Nigerian schools that barely could equip you to face the reality of life, I realized I should have stayed back after secondary school to learn a skill

I wouldn’t want my children to make that stupid mistake, instead of them going to after school lessons I will rather enrol them in skills acquisitions programs

That’s more proactive

This is why i have no iota of respect for poor men. You have no land. No house. No business. No meaningful network. Not even a good job, and yet you go ahead breeding children you can never take care of. Even 3 square meals a day is a problem Nothing beats leaving a legacy for your children. It gives them a headstart in life. If you know you can't take care of yourself talk of a wife and a kid, please die alone. It's wickedness to bring a child to partake in your suffering.

Gadafii:
My biggest regret till today is that I failed to learn a skill before I went to university, I rushed into university, without tangible skills, after wasting so much studying stupiid courses offered by Nigerian schools that barely could equip you to face the reality of life, I realized I should have stayed back after secondary school to learn a skill

I wouldn’t want my children to make that stupid mistake, instead of them going to after school lessons I will rather enrol them in skills acquisitions programs

That’s more proactive

Same here bro, although i have learned a skill but I'm yet to be experienced at it. Had i learnt in 2013 when i finished my secondary school education, i believe I'll be more experienced by now.

True

Mehn. Life is humbling.

Siminialaye20:
Mehn. Life is humbling.

That's just the truth, life will humble you.

Omoh...poverty is a bastard

pansophist:
This is depressing because it is true.

The rules of the game have changed, and fathers should be coaching their sons, to not go through the same path as others.

The time people wasted in uni studying a useless course would have been channeled to do better things.

Brethren, the thing is having a degree is like having a "literacy" status. Graduates are littered everywhere and more struggling undergrads are coming in... What to do now?

Collinsaik:
Op u hav made valid points and ill like to say that contentment is the way to go for every young man out there . U may nt be where you want to be yet, but dont be too desperate to be like the other guys you see on social media who apear to be living the life. Take it easy. most of them are into a lot of shits to live such kind of lifestyle and drive big cars and all of it but deep inside of them they lack hapines and peace...

Contentment? With the way some "category of people" would be using money and cars to rub person face...
You are right... behind the scenes of some money eh

pansophist:
This is depressing because it is true.

The rules of the game have changed, and fathers should be coaching their sons, to not go through the same path as others.

The time people wasted in uni studying a useless course would have been channeled to do better things.

But again, youthful exuberance won't allow lots of young people to just focus and understand that the playfulness of today is the regret of tomorrow.

A man will have to pick one of two poisons. The first one is to suffer very hard in his 20s, then life can be soft on him in his 30s,

or sadly, to live without intention thinking the future will just set itself up. It is sad that a lot of people have to get old before they know that time is life.

For men, their most golden age is their 20s. It's the age of no responsibilities, the best physical strength, no baggage, and time flexibility. He must spend this age wisely, to prepare for another stage of life in his 30s.

Then life will be very soft on him. Friends will love and respect him, women will love and want to be with him, and his society will give him warmth.

There is no guarantee of success after much suffering, but you miss all the shots you didn't take, so it's always better to shoot.

This is wisdom. Pure golden wisdom

A friend of mine, his dad left him, 100m in the bank. This guy just fixed the funds in the bank and was earning about 10m per year.

This guy just sleeps, wakes, gym, eat healthy, flex and date women.

He lives in a three bedroom apartment, that is well furnished. And has a clean venza. He drives only at close proximity.

I have told him to invest in real estate, or airbnb, the guy is afraid to risk.

Bunkbars:
A friend of mine, his dad left him, 100m in the bank. This guy just fixed the funds in the bank and was earning about 10m per year.

This guy just sleeps, wakes, gym, eat healthy, flex and date women.

He lives in a three bedroom apartment, that is well furnished. And has a clean venza. He drives only at close proximity.

I have told him to invest in real estate, or airbnb, the guy is afraid to risk.

abeg, send me his contact. i want to check something

ideamonster:


abeg, send me his contact. i want to check something

send whose number, continue playing .

GodWrites:
This is why i have no iota of respect for poor men. You have no land. No house. No business. No meaningful network. Not even a good job, and yet you go ahead breeding children you can never take care of. Even 3 square meals a day is a problem Nothing beats leaving a legacy for your children. It gives them a headstart in life. If you know you can't take care of yourself talk of a wife and a kid, please die alone. It's wickedness to bring a child to partake in your suffering.

✔✔✔

Bunkbars:
A friend of mine, his dad left him, 100m in the bank. This guy just fixed the funds in the bank and was earning about 10m per year.

This guy just sleeps, wakes, gym, eat healthy, flex and date women.

He lives in a three bedroom apartment, that is well furnished. And has a clean venza. He drives only at close proximity.

I have told him to invest in real estate, or airbnb, the guy is afraid to risk.

Wait.. You mean the bank pays him an interest of 100M every year?

dominique pls move to FP

Most guys in their late teens and early 20s lack the blueprint of how they want their lives to be in the next 10 years.

If you want to experiment this, meet 100 random guys in their late teens and early 20s and ask them what they'll do if 5m is credited into their account.

You'd be shocked that more than 95% of them would be unable to give you a business oriented answer, aside telling you that they'll invest it or do business, if you probe deeper to know the kind of business or investment they intend to do and how they plan to execute it, they'll go mute...this is beginning of failure.

What occupies the minds of most of them are irrelevant things like women, more women, sex, gambling, masturbation, alcohol, clubs, more women, relationships...etc.

You can't carry all that gabbage in your 20s and expect your 30s to be successful. Life isn't magic.

If your parents can't afford to send you to the university, learn a trade. I know a distant family member who dropped out from secondary school at JSS3 and went to learn spare parts many years ago. Today he has his own building at okota.

The secret to a successful life is finding those things that distract you from focusing on your goals and eliminating them. Only then would you be able to achieve something meaningful in your 30s.

JasonNOTStatham:
Brethren, the thing is having a degree is like having a "literacy" status. Graduates are littered everywhere and more struggling undergrads are coming in... What to do now?

Do you know who I am?

You see the above statement, lots of Nigerians will die to be able to say it, and a university degree is what qualifies them to utter such statement.

The idea that graduating from the university somehow makes you so important and with levels is a thing of the past, maybe three decades after independence, not now.

Infact school now is where lots of people go in to get damaged. From having useless ego, joining cultism/gangs, establishing olosho career, party and sleep around full time, while wasting money and disappointing parental hope.

Lots of people are better without university. They should learn handwork, start a small business, or become an employee and grow from there. School now is where good girls go to get bad.

Nazgul:
Most guys in their late teens and early 20s lack the blueprint of how they want their lives to be in the next 10 years.

If you want to experiment this, meet 100 random guys in their late teens and early 20s and ask them what they'll do if 5m is credited into their account.

You'd be shocked that more than 95% of them would be unable to give you a business oriented answer, aside telling you that they'll invest it or do business, if you probe deeper to know the kind of business or investment they intend to do and how they plan to execute it, they'll go mute...this is beginning of failure.

What occupies the minds of most of them are irrelevant things like women, more women, sex, gambling, masturbation, alcohol, clubs, more women, relationships...etc.

You can't carry all that gabbage in your 20s and expect your 30s to be successful. Life isn't magic.

You are totally right.
Most youths are not prepared for the future that awaits them.
All they know is flexing, banging, clubbing etc
Tell a youth between 24 to 30 years what they will do with 3m and most will tell you to rent an apartment and furnish it or get a nice ride because the 3m is not enough to japa (which is virtually what is in their head).
No other thing. Nothing

emmaodet:
You are totally right.
Most youths are not prepared for the future that awaits them.
All they know is flexing, banging, clubbing etc
Tell a youth between 24 to 30 years what they will do with 3m and most will tell you to rent an apartment and furnish it or get a nice ride because the 3m is not enough to japa (which is virtually what is in their head).
No other thing. Nothing

@ bolded.
Without any sustainable income, they wouldn't be able to maintain the car or the house they rented.

I used to know a guy (about 28 years of age) In the former area where I lived in 2021.

One Sunday morning as I was going to church, I saw him in the midst of a crowd of guys, they were throwing him up, I slowed down and asked someone close by what the problem is and he told me that this guy just won a bet of about 9m from bet9ja.

That was the last day I saw him in that area until last year when I ran into him. He was looking so haggard and unkept, I couldn't even believe that this guy who had 9m just last year is practically broke a year later.

Most young guys have no plans for themselves, so even if by some miracle, money finds it way to them, rather than set up themselves and become financially buoyant for life, they'll just squander it on women and clubbing and remain poor.

This is why Yahoo boys are always broke.