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What Happens by lovelydoll: 4:40am On Nov 08, 2011 |
i am not sure but what happens when a guy somehow tricks you into a place alone, then asks for sex you say no,but somehow does not allow you to leave.then he touches your breast, you say stop but he doesn't, you don't want to be ashamed or hurt but you play along and give him what he wants so he can leave you alone. after you deny him sex,he gives you another option which is to go down on him, you say no again then he raises his voice to scare you into doing it.then he sweetens his voice and promises you he will leave you if you do it. Then you do for the desperation to leave. your confused and scared you don't scream because you don't want to be ashamed of falling for a silly boys trick,and you don't want to get in trouble. you don't fight back because the guy is huge and can knock you out with one hit. his loud voice scares you into thinking he will beat you. he says sorry anytime he hurts you,but continues. my question is this okay? ,who would you blame? may i add the girl went to an all girls school has no clue how the mind of a guy works,has no personal experience with guys, and believed he wanted to be friends and wasn't thinking about sex,the only boys she's been around are family members who denied boys thought about sex all the time,and were jerks,she also has low self esteem and didn't believe she was attractive. but she wanted to know how it felt like to have a guy friend like everyone else so she put her trust in him too quickly. btw this is not me but i am the only person who knows about this. |
Re: What Happens by Nobody: 5:43am On Nov 08, 2011 |
The damage has already been done. Hopefully she will learn from experience. Poor girl some guys are dog in the form of humans. |
Re: What Happens by Nobody: 6:19am On Nov 08, 2011 |
Very sad. This is the result of what low selfesteem could cause. She just have to love herself dearly. Pls tel her to stay off that guy. |
Re: What Happens by lovelydoll: 6:25am On Nov 08, 2011 |
yes low self esteem is very dangerous i believe she is very pretty,and no the girl is in hiding she is scared of the guy. i want to confront the guy,but she doesn't want anyone to know |
Re: What Happens by Nobody: 6:33am On Nov 08, 2011 |
Just send the gal phone numba 2 my email. I can bust her self-confidence. Edited. |
Re: What Happens by lovelydoll: 6:41am On Nov 08, 2011 |
yorke:lol i don't think she will go near a guy in awhile |
Re: What Happens by Emeka72(m): 6:48am On Nov 08, 2011 |
Dats how a true babe should react; just let d guy know u're not interested and don't disgrace him because boys don't like 2 b disgraced. U wil see dat He wil leave u alone because He's not mad. |
Re: What Happens by Nobody: 6:57am On Nov 08, 2011 |
lovelydoll: Emeka 7.:Rubbish. What d hell did u type above? Did u wake up from d wrong side of ur mind or u are just plainly stupid? If it were 2 be ur sister, would you have typed that gibberish. |
Re: What Happens by slimyem: 7:21am On Nov 08, 2011 |
the deed has been done already.nothing's gon happen.she should let go and learn to love herself. And then she should start trusting herself and her instincts first before anyone. |
Re: What Happens by Nobody: 7:51am On Nov 08, 2011 |
what a pity, she should takia of herself, love herself and work on her 'self esteem' and 'overcome inferiority complex' and move on. What has happened, has happened. Some guys are just plain heartless, poor girl. |
Re: What Happens by Ranoscky(m): 7:56am On Nov 08, 2011 |
Cannot fit read all dah tin now, go com back leta! |
Re: What Happens by Nobody: 8:26am On Nov 08, 2011 |
@ poster, Your friend sounds innocent and naive. And This is not ok and your friend has done nothing wrong. She can only learn from this. First of all, she must not put herself in this vulnerable position again. Second, he was manipulating her, and abusing her! I dont think this is low self esteem but lack of experience, innocence, and maybe the intimidation of authority/ a guy/ feeling one must go along with this Third, She could make nice guy friends but learn to recognize the red flags that may appear when a guy is pushing for something more. Like slimyem said: Start trusting yourself and your instinsts! Listen to Your Gut feeling!! It is always right! |
Re: What Happens by Nobody: 8:44am On Nov 08, 2011 |
This is sad. The guy was simply manipulative. No, op, it's not okay. And i may add it stems from low self-esteem, not innocence or naïvete. Your friend, cos she afraid what the guy would think of her if she declined, fell for his machinations. The guy waz simply stringing her along with his actions and words, he couldn't have done it any differently. It was certainly left to the girl to pull away from him, to find help for herself. The main problem here is that this could continue and could eventually mess up the girl's future. |
Re: What Happens by lovelydoll: 8:56am On Nov 08, 2011 |
i really like these comments one sec i will get her,even thought she may be mad at me for not keeping secret. i will still bring her to see ![]() |
Re: What Happens by freecocoa(f): 9:10am On Nov 08, 2011 |
I feel sorry for the girl and that guy is a ra pist,well she just needs to work on her self esteem and make this an experience she should learn from. But I must say going to an all girls school doesn't mean one won't know a thing about guys(believe me na them know pass),the girl is over naïve for this age and time,doesn't she read books?what has her mum been doing?I mean she must have at one point or another heard boys being discussed. what about movies?I don't believe any girl is totally clueless as to how guys reason. I'm in no way blaming her but let her not be so in a rush to be someone's girlfriend,she needs to know there are a million guys out there who will love and appreciate her. |
Re: What Happens by Spclst900: 9:26am On Nov 08, 2011 |
what a pity! |
Re: What Happens by lovelydoll: 9:31am On Nov 08, 2011 |
freecocoa: lol ofcourse she knew about guys she just never had any personal experience with them ,plus movies are superficial on love they often show a lost girls and all of a sudden prince charming appears out of nowhere they fight at first,then get married. |
Re: What Happens by freecocoa(f): 9:58am On Nov 08, 2011 |
lovelydoll:I can see you both have only be watching movies like cinderella,prince charming,beauty and the beast,TItanic,romeo and juliet and the likes,you need to stop for a while and watch the ones with names like understanding a man,Beauty and the briefcase,pains of love,why some men are jerks,Heart break,Two can play that game,Waiting to exhale,He lied,I could go on forever, Tell your friend to not be in a hurry to be in a relationship,she shouldn't let anyone take advantage of her cos she's naïve and don't think high of herself,I'm sure if she had said NO and stuck to it,maybe that guy would respect her more. |
Re: What Happens by simplymary: 10:08am On Nov 08, 2011 |
This is in no way okay. ![]() ![]() But with that being said, could you tell me how long she knew this guy and if they were family or close enough to be family? |
Re: What Happens by pendo89(f): 10:31am On Nov 08, 2011 |
lovelydoll: my dear listen. I feel sorry for what happened but I always say nothing new ever happens in this world. This girl grew up in an all girls school you say,well many of us did but we were not very ignorant. I was a closed up person,I completely avoided boys cz I didnt know much about them apart from what I read/heard so I can understand the being naive part.But that doesn't mean you be ignorant.Even biology lessons tell us how boys body's react. To be safe I never accompanied any guy to his place cz I knew anything could happen. I wasnt an angel.I had read about r-a-p-i-s-t-s and seen movies so I always had that in mind while dealing with boys.Playing safe was my tactic and it helped cz I avoided risky situations as much as possible. Now I know there's an age where every girl wants to know what lies on the other side.you want to be juliet and him romeo. I guess that's why she accompanied the dude home. risky. I hate to imagine what would have happened if she found other men there with him.Nobody dragged her there. A good guy would have let her go but did she even know the guy too well to go into his house? what if he was a murderer? Upbringing aside.We take risks and they come with consequences. Its unfortunate but let her rise up and move on.The guy is probably plotting for another girl. Responsibility lies with the girl. Then please warn her next time never to voluntarily walk into into a strange lion's den and expect not to be eaten.Lions are merciless.They bite their own cubs. And then tell her never to allow a guy boost her self esteem through sex. She has a lot of work to do on her esteem first before she starts dating |
Re: What Happens by lovelydoll: 10:44am On Nov 08, 2011 |
simplymary: lol that was easy how he got her alone, by simply asking her to go on a [b]date [/b]with her. freecocoa omg ,your correct that's why i want to confront this guy,he is most likely after another girl, i don't want him walking freely,but she won't tell me his full name. welll risk means consequences your right. |
Re: What Happens by sexsinners(m): 4:27pm On Nov 08, 2011 |
well your friend should pray,and boost her self esteem.never allow a boy to take her anywhere alone again. |
Re: What Happens by iice(f): 4:33pm On Nov 08, 2011 |
Very sketchy story. Sounds like something that happens to someone who has been living in a cave. |
Re: What Happens by sexsinners(m): 4:58pm On Nov 08, 2011 |
iice: Ice things like this happen all the time,maybe the guys she has been around were also innocent.Maybe she was kind and learned to not judge people to quickly.there are many times where people took advantage of my Godly kindness and left me stranded for giving them a chance.now am merciless to the devils. cave or no cave i don't think every girl would believes us guys are assholes.HECK! maybe she wanted to be like the other girls who had guy friends and thought this was the process of how to get them. you never know, that's why you can not make comments like that. there are many girls in my fathers church who had worse happen to them,every girl has a first time with a guy and it doesn't always end up pretty. |
Re: What Happens by izontimi(m): 5:00pm On Nov 08, 2011 |
yes |
Re: What Happens by iice(f): 5:09pm On Nov 08, 2011 |
sexsinners: Wetin be all this? I will make the comments i want to make because they are true. You do know, there is a thing like reserving judgement right? Same as understanding the capacity of a person is not the same as judging someone. Just because someone did something bad to someone doesn't mean all people of that gender should be painted with the same brush. And your end sentence falls into that category. People and their 'speak' claims. ![]() We are in a age of where 5yrs olds know about sex. To be innocent doesn't mean one should be without knowledge of some sort. Humans have instincts but for some reason, they don't use it. ![]() |
Re: What Happens by sexsinners(m): 5:15pm On Nov 08, 2011 |
iice: but you just said only people in a cave can fall for something like that? everyone makes mistakes, you shouldn't insult the victim. |
Re: What Happens by freecocoa(f): 5:31pm On Nov 08, 2011 |
@Sex sinners,its not an insult more like,it just seems kinda mushy the way the op presented the story,I mean an all girls school is not an excuse for being clueless,the victim just seem like someone who is not in this present Age the way the story was told. |
Re: What Happens by sexsinners(m): 5:55pm On Nov 08, 2011 |
freecocoa: but again[b] you never know[/b] this happens more then ever ,in this day and age this is called a date rape, the OP said the girl did not think she was attractive, so probably every guy she met wanted to be friends with her and didn't find any interest in her. you can't just base it on girls school there are other evidence in this story. like guys in the family low self esteem probably wanting to make friends doesn't know how to make frds(yes theres ppl like that) i really think the victim should come and tell us what happen maybe you two would understand. yes its an insult to compare someones innocent mistake to a caveman |
Re: What Happens by sexsinners(m): 6:04pm On Nov 08, 2011 |
@op am pretty sure the victim is blaming herself already and killing herself over it most victims of sexual assault blame themselves . That's why i said there's no use in blaming her, she needs to know God is there for her. OP you should take her to a psychologist or get her counseling, her self esteem has probably been lowered .but i am so glad she told you this is something they shouldn't suffer in silent |
Re: What Happens by iice(f): 6:07pm On Nov 08, 2011 |
sexsinners: Something must be in the water for ya'll cognitive development is something else. ![]() In layman's english. . .someone in a cave means someone isolated. There is no somehow did this, somehow did that, and somehow that this. People always use excuses for justification and sympathy to verify what they did or contributed to anything that went wrong in their lives. Accept that you shouldn't have done so and so, learn to be careful next time. |
Re: What Happens by sexsinners(m): 6:10pm On Nov 08, 2011 |
is this girl in college? college rape happens very often 1 out of every 5 girls will be a victim of a college rape. sadly, 12% report it and the rest suffer,so she is not ALONE. op i hope this helps |
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