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DM From A Man That Married An Older Woman - Romance - Nairaland

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DM From A Man That Married An Older Woman by AgbaJohnDoe: 3:24pm On Jun 02
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Re: DM From A Man That Married An Older Woman by AgbaJohnDoe: 3:24pm On Jun 02
I'm not sure what advise you seek for, but it's clear (from your story), why you're experiencing what you're experiencing in your marriage.
Your wife told you that her parents didn't want her to have a a boyfriend in uni, but they wanted her to just bring a husband.

Let us do a bit of arithmetic.

Your wife is presently 33 & you're 32.

And your marriage is 6 years this September.

Meaning you married her when she was 27 and you were 26.

At almost 27, she traveled to come see you on your birthday.

And she knacked you.


Meaning, you didn't meet her as a virgin.

This is someone that said her parents frowned at her having any relationships.

Did it not occur to you, that she wasn't a novice?

And then because of what she did, you fell on love with her & married her in 6 months without cohabiting or proper vetting.

It's true you said that her parents are good.

It's also possible that she was raised well too.

But what you didn't factor is that her upbringing & parents behavior is not a guarantee that it will automatically transcend to her being a good wife to you.

This is why courtship is very important.

And age is also important.

Your wife accepted to marry you to please her parents.


And she also needed to have kids in a proper family setting.

Remember what I have been saying about women marrying men that they're bigger than in age, money, exposure or experience?

They'll accept to marry you, get what they've always wanted, & begin to frustrate you so that you can ask for a divorce or separation.

Otherwise, tell me...

Why would a married woman move out of her room and starve her husband of sex for almost 2 years?

Is that not enough to frustrate you to seek for separation or divorce?

She even boldly told you that you can go out to satisfy yourself sexually.

Who does that & what does that tell you?

Meaning she doesn't care.


As far as she's concerned, you have given her what she wants (kids).

And you know that it's a shameful thing to voice out as a man, that your wife is starving you of sex correct?

Question:

In these 2 years, has your wife not been having sex?

Has it ever occurred to you?

What excuses can she possibly give that has made her refuse to have sex with you?

Is she incapacitated?

Can it be PPD?

Even if it's any of these, will a wife who feels for her husband not at least try to initiate sex so as to please her husband?

You also said that she's always arguing with you.

And that she wants to always have the say & decide for you.


Your wife sees you as her junior & like you said, the only thing that is still keeping your marriage is because you're the provider.

That's your shield.

But as for your ego, your wife has crushed it.

I don't want you young men to see this case as an exception.

It's not.

If men who are in his shoes come out to speak, 9/10 will echo this man's experience.

You as a man, must be ahead of your wife in almost all things.

And age, is top of the list.

A woman of you agemate sees you as her junior.

Then imagine the one that is older than you are?

Also, no matter how "nice" a lady treats you, make sure you go through the tenets of relationship before you conclude on marrying her.

Because men rarely get treated nicely by women, doesn't mean that they should sell their commitment so cheap because they met a lady that did the "uncommon".

When my wife gave me about 2k to go visit my father, I was elated because it was rare.

And immediately, I told myself that this lady will be my wife.

[b][/b]But that didn't stop me from being convinced through proper dating, cohabiting & several tests & quarrels.


You just have to pass through it.

Like I said yesterday, take the harder right, than the easier wrong.

Otherwise, when all the "love" fades, reality will dawn on you in marriage.

End.

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Re: DM From A Man That Married An Older Woman by Sunnyrado: 4:18pm On Jun 02
Am In interested in older women too
Re: DM From A Man That Married An Older Woman by Lalami3232(m): 4:22pm On Jun 02
Na wa ooooooo!!!
Re: DM From A Man That Married An Older Woman by Zonefree(m): 4:24pm On Jun 02
Weak man. Age has nothing to do with what you're passing through. A weak man is a weak man, regardless of the age difference.

7 Likes

Re: DM From A Man That Married An Older Woman by EmmyMaestro(m): 4:30pm On Jun 02
Sunnyrado:
Am In interested in older women too

Me too, but for knacks ooooo

grin grin grin grin grin grin
Re: DM From A Man That Married An Older Woman by Sunnyrado: 11:11pm On Jun 02
Are you Nackson by nature?
Re: DM From A Man That Married An Older Woman by RighteousDemon: 2:04am On Jun 03
Try again. This time harder
Re: DM From A Man That Married An Older Woman by Nukilia: 4:33am On Jun 03
Take your mind off these rubbish thoughts. If you married an American woman,, you will not come here to tell us all these stories. Hit the gym, care for your wife and kids and enjoy every bit of the moment.

Your experience is not different from a lot of those who married younger women. Everyday we see quarrels going on irrespective of age. Stay positive as somethingg beautiful is about to happen in your life. wink

Cheers
Re: DM From A Man That Married An Older Woman by LocalStandard1(m): 8:21am On Jun 03
Be very careful with older women!

The person I bought business from is in the very same predicament. The guy had to sell off his establishment and run back home relocating permanently leaving the wife and kids behind. Children he isn't sure are all his as he promised to do DNA test when he becomes capable. The last born looks more like the former married "boyfriend", who visited on the dedication and gave her fifty thousand in the husband's presence.

The man even though quiet and peaceful, but takes different women and sleeps with them at the establishment and almost never sleeps at home. Everyone critizes and condemns his behavior (even I) without hearing from his side making it one of the reasons he relocated.

On his last days in the city he told me only a glimpse of the problems the wife gives him and it made me greatly sympathize and pity him, she cheats with her former married "boyfriend" and sneaks out leaving the children behind. Doesn't allow him even sleep on the same bed as she, insults and demean him. But outside you'd think she's spotless.

The same woman began disturbing me for money after the husband she never appreciates relocated, I blocked both of her numbers.

We as a society most begin to listen to the man's side of every story, some women are highly guilty, pretentious evils.

2 Likes

Re: DM From A Man That Married An Older Woman by gerizzim: 1:29pm On Jun 04
AgbaJohnDoe:
[b][/b]

interesting......well marrying an older woman is not really the reason why you are having a tough time relating wit your wife. The challenge in that marriage is because of some things she knows that you DNT know.

she is 33yrs and you are 32yrs. she appears to be ahead of you in terms of exposure, real life experience and knowledge. That is her leverage over you.

I once had a female frnd like dt. she is 2yrs my senior. wen I was 35. She was 37. with all humility, I am ahead of her in terms of exposure and real life experience.
she most times ask me even up till now for my opinion on issues dt affect her for advice and guidance.

Before we got close, I use to assume she is loaded in wisdom abt life that I cud learn from. It was wen we became close dt I knew I was far ahead of her.
sometimes I wil scold her nd talk to her like my mate nt rudely anyway but after dt moment, I wil ask myself, am I really the one tongue lashing dis woman or na my spirit. The simple reason is because I know a lot of stuffs dt she doesn't know.

she is more verse and knowledgeable Dan you that is the source of your woes.

As we grow , get older and constantly seeking knowledge and more awareness , one wud realize he is constantly changing in his thoughts and behaviours.

between your first year and the sixth year of your marriage, she has been exposing herself to the good, bad and ugly scenario of life knowledge wise.

she may not necessarily be the actor in dt situation but frm oda peoples experience,from the internet and in her hunger for knowledge, she started agreeing to som of diz stuffs or experiences of odas and adopted it in her marriage that was what made her to change.

On your path, you stopped improving urself. You stopped engaging your mind as regrds reading or learning how to act manly frm odas dt are ahead of you. That is where you loose guard. Work on your mind. If you do, you wil start seeing results.

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